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A scientific lizard 🧬🦎 Profile
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎

@sciliz

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Followers
4,057
Following
6,208
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114,075
Statuses

"Just the right balance of nerd and badass". Much science. Much snark. Too much politics.

sweet coast
Joined January 2010
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
12 years
the eppendorf tubes were "shaken like a polaroid picture" until that part of the song ended #overlyhonestmethods #truth
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@JortsTheCat Please enjoy this drawing by my 6 year old, who understands you deeply:
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
My 6 year old asked me why trees don't have brains and friends I have been studying biology for 20 years and I haven't got a clue
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@JasonMW45 @Emerald37227481 @MartinDougher12 @DoomScroling @LolaMontez2 @LilaGraceRose 1,205 women died of childbirth in the US in 2021. 0 men died of fatherhood. You never have to see or have anything else to say about this topic ever again. You have that choice. Choose wisely.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@CatDocMD I am microbiologist and I eat raw cookie dough
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
10 months
@KSchaferPhD I don't so much resent "I am unable to pursue research with the same intensity"- quite frankly, pre-kids I had an unhealthy commitment to grind when it was actually counterproductive. I resent the HECK out of sacrifices of the "society makes me chose for stupid reasons" type
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@ChantelleBakerr sweetie, even men can look chubby in a floofy sheet if they try
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
A PhD costs $781,526.45, for someone who starts filling their Roth IRA at age 31 instead of 22 (assuming 7% return).
@llmunro
Dr. Lisa Munro
1 year
@TheStrugglingS4 Retirement savings. You can expect to be approximately a decade (or more) behind your non-PhD peers in retirement savings. I don't hear anyone talking about this nearly enough.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@RexChapman
Rex ChapmanπŸ‡πŸΌ
3 years
A couple put a mic on their 4-year-old while snowboarding, and dressed him up in a dinosaur outfit. In case you could use a smile today…
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@johngreen John, if it's actual hate I'm not defending it because @hankgreen is fully awesome full stop. But if dunking on his quote about how "voting" is the key? This is an opportunity for both of you to reflect on the sociological factors that lead people to have faith in politics.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@IAmDylanLewis "oh it's very clear you've focused on development of technical skills instead of leadership in the context of problems with ambiguity and nuance. But I'm sure you can learn some of the problem solving tools from the humanities if you apply yourself"
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@TheBcellArtist NIH postdoc payscale for 0 years in 2021: $53,760. College grad 2020 starting salary: $55,260
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@punkrockscience "Can you help me understand your reasoning process?"
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
HARVARD VS BROAD: WHOSE MICE WILL DIE?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
11 months
How much does a graduate student cost per year? Salary: $27,144 Benefits + Tuition: $28,262 Mice per diem: $392,293 Travel: $2,000 Overhead: $14,934 Total: $ 464,600 WON'T SOMEONE WHO IS GOOD AT NIH PLEASE HELP ME BUDGET? MY LAB IS DYING!!!
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
11 months
@dougboneparth What are they doing paying for Ubers when they have a car?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@anne_theriault I think what hits me so hard is that... it's not so much that people are doing horrible things, it is that they aren't capable of identifying them as horrible. It's not a brainwashing dystopia, because they lack brains.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@kalydoscopio @DrLesterColl reading this tweet changed my DNA and I want a refund
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@TheBcellArtist People don't go to grad school to make money, but opportunity cost of 6.5 years of grad school at 25k vs 55k is already 200k, when you compound that over 38 working years, 2.6 million. Postdocs are throwing good money after bad.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@hankgreen I mean it's an entire ecosystem and a real time adaptive evolution experiment in adaptive immunity to get the inflammation tolerance /alert system calibrated to that ecosystem. It's a miracle any of us can eat food, actually. But I would still be mad in your situation.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
10 months
@z3r0c001_ @JoshLekach He's excessively earnest. It's like Jim Henson, Mr. Rogers and Bob Ross had a librarian baby, and his hair is extra. So he's going to attract hate from haters.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
10 months
@clhubes I *think* that what that means is that developmentally, the desire to play in hiding places peaks much younger than parents feel climbing skill peaks. But yes, the net impact is quite sad.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@PsychNiles Most advantages/drawbacks of faculty life are visible from the undergrad vantage. The biggest thing you realize in grad school is that becoming faculty/getting tenure *requires* using the labor of grad students who aren't paid a living wage.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
truly, has there ever been a tweet more about tweeting
@EffinBirds
Effin' Birds
2 years
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@remax281 @fawfulfan textbooks are a racket, but for publishers not profs. What do you think an adjunct prof makes anyway?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@ProfDAHammer "peer review" is not an almost-300 year old institution with 20 billion dollars that told Dr. KarikΓ³ her work wasn't "faculty caliber" who is now trying to borrow her prestige to further their own branding mission and having it spectacularly and deservedly blow up
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
New rule: using the term "unskilled labor" gets you sentenced to 80 of these fields with two machetes and no bathroom until it's done
@UrOrientalist
Heshmat Alavi's Trenchcoat
4 years
Good morning to agricultural workers only
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@MistressSnowPhD "Wow I wish *I* had time for that reasonable hobby/enough sleep/exercise/cooking food"
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@JasonMW45 @Emerald37227481 @MartinDougher12 @DoomScroling @LolaMontez2 @LilaGraceRose Pro-life means donating bed nets to save the lives of children from malaria, not being a busybody re: other people's uteruses. You are thinking of anti FREEDOM Taliban-esque religious terrorists subverting Christianity for the purposes of oppression.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@Becky_Faith @aimsinpeng @Worse_Reviewer @AcademicsSay OK, but tech startups: *Sexist *terribly wasteful of human talent *only care about making money *incapable of ethics
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
8 years
@ParkerMolloy @JNRutherford I for one applaud @Wendys for going from corporate bland to actually funny twitter snark in record time
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@Swilua valid, although also relevant is that *every* job as construed by Boomers in leadership is actually a 2 person job, and the assumption is that one of the people doing the job is an unpaid women is baked in everywhere
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@hankgreen I am a molecular microbiologist and I will tell you I hate using anything other than 70% ethanol and since that also kills Covid we should all just switch to it forever and also it works on cell phones.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@sebatlab Counterpoint: the creativity of young scientists is actually at their peak when they transition to a new field. In order to become an established PI with a genuine niche opened up by novel work, you generally have to be using new tools brought to you by postdocs NOT in YOUR field
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@hankgreen ok, this may be the best example of Barbie doing some good in this dang world.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
When people found out I studied malaria as a grad student, 1/10 wanted to give me an opinion about Bill Gates and 9/10 wanted to tell me about this crazy chloroquine experience they had. I am weirdly prepared for the current political moment.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
@JSheltzer @Caroline_Bartma Load the cells into syringes and threaten to inject my PI with both. Whichever she is more scared of is the cancer. #WhyAmILockedInALab
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@johngreen @JNJNews lol my god John you just do not quit
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
8 years
@maddow "What a small, cruel thing" about sums up Trump's MO. And him.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@vanjchan no no. Do not be embarrassed you went off script. In fact, you showed us a new and better way.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
omg they are both so great
@rodefer
Josh Rodefer πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ πŸ₯₯ 🌴
5 years
who wore it better?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
I see nothing scary about this majestic and delightful rave reindeer
@kakslauttanen
Kakslauttanen Arctic Resort
5 years
Herders spraying reflective paint on their reindeer's antlers to avoid road accidents leads to absolute surreal and scary pictures #Lapland #Finland
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@DaveAlvord @KamalaHarris The fetus is an obligate parasite until viability. A fetus steals Mom's vascular system for placenta and nutrients for body (including iron and calcium). It alters her body more than most organ donations. Babies do not magically float in bubbles in either Mom or Dads bodies.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@BushsBeans ok, you guys know what to do. Massive donation to food pantries that focus on child hunger, WITH pull tab cans OR can openers! MAKE IT RIGHT AND THE INTERNET WILL REWARD YOU WITH ALL THE PURCHASES
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@TPP_MD is this a humblebrag of obfuscation like "I went to school in the Northeast"
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
Periodic reminder that the US *government* already spends more on healthcare than peer nations, and gets less for it.
@fuckyouiquit
Fuck You I Quit
1 year
It will never make sense to me
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@mcdowell_is @dan_munz I want a cheery "beep boop" for like "hey pedestrian I'm waving you across" honk and a "F YOU!!!" for when a truck cut me off because he's driving like a racecar
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
10 months
Something that sounds crazy but is true is that for most of human history if you wanted to experience music you had to actually *be there while it was produced*. Dr. Pepper is older than the idea of recorded music. And look at what we've done. Truly astonishment.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
10 months
If you fill your Roth IRA for 10 years at the beginning of your career, and get 7% real returns, and never contribute another dime during 30 additional working years, we're talking $670k at retirement. 10 years in your 20s is worth so much more than 10 years in your 30s.
@llmunro
Dr. Lisa Munro
10 months
The dead horse I won't stop beating: your PhD will cost you approximately 5-10 years of retirement savings
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@queeersocialist If I offer to buy all the Doritos and you buy all the weed, that is, for reasons unknown, not "synergistic in-kind exchange of creative entrepreneurs" but "abuse", because the people doing so aren't rich
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
Guys, I had a job interview today. It was scary, and hard, and I probably didn't get it. But... I met some lovely people and I'm fine now. So if there's something you aren't *quite* qualified for, but would love to do. Apply. It's worth the effort.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@MrPeanut Blink twice if this social media account is run by an unpaid intern
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
@PATreasury never change, mysteriously not-bland tweeter of the @PATreasury
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@briansantamaria @paulg Pshaw stop using math to try to prove taxes don't make dumb people think the gubmint won't take everything
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@foofdawg @CatDocMD Truly, food scientists are living in the future and we do not give them the credit they deserve
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
THEY TRICKED US ALL
@TheOnion
The Onion
3 years
Scientist Really Thought Job Would Be Less Grant Writing And More Glow-In-The-Dark Lizard Making
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@RepHumphrey @sammy_hayes12 @UNC Sir, your profile says you are an Eagle Scout. This tweet is not Kind. It is not Trustworthy. It is not Helpful. You are not living up to the Scout Law. Your daughter, and all of our children, deserve better leadership.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
tweets like this bother me because while I fully appreciate PhD students have a wide range of experiences, to me there is implicitly a vibe of "the system is fine" in these tweets, and friends? The system sucks.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@Dr_Stoat You do not photosynthesize because I have yet to get IRB approval to CRISPR some euglena genes into my skin to prove it's a viable choice
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
10 months
I made a helpful chart!
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
HIV, TB, and malaria have entered the chat
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@Yash25571056 Society requires, among other things, that we set up systems that are forgiving of cognitive lapses. If a street is only safe if kids can't run across it, engineer the whole street for traffic calming instead of assuming you need smarter kids.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@VDion_and_Lab "we thank Reviewer 2 for their comment, and the Editor for their hard work in obtaining not one, but multiple, qualified reviewers. We do not feel this dilutes the reviewers helpful peer review contributions in any way"
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@brettjgall @olgakhazan It is not. I had my son during my PhD in molecular medicine, and childcare subsidy was the only thing that made it possible. Many people make less than 40k, even STEM majors. STEM majors are in many ways more rigid training paths, and less forgiving of ovary expiration dates.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
6 years
@HaleyMancini @saladinahmed This. Running gags between friends, quoting campy movies/musicals, doing very low key deviant things like moving people's garden gnomes or spray painting hair bright pink. We were very weird as a bonding thing.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@annehelen Things like dance, photography and gardening *can* all take up as much time as golf. But to the best of my knowledge none of those have *entire resorts structured around them*, and the sheer land use doesn't compare.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@eLife This is a very bad look for you. I think you've taken far more reputational damage by making this move than you ever would have by either standing with or issuing a statement disagreeing with Eisen.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@WriterJewell Sharpie a pink bikini onto one (1) of the babies, then create a dragon pinata out of paper mache. When the dragon's belly bursts open, the babies will fly out. Who-ever gets the pink bikini baby gets a cosmo.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@Akito__Tenkawa @1gillianfrank1 How about it? The wait list for organ donations does not mean it would be morally correct to slaughter you and steal your kidneys. It's not OK for you to steal my uterus. WTF is this hard to understand??
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@VirusesImmunity I've been assuming all the variants can cause long Covid, but perhaps at different rates. What patterns are you seeing with regards to variants and long Covid?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
1 year
@DEC0L0NIZE One of the Great Disappointments of the pandemic was that no one besides me seemed to think a nice socially distanced picnic with handpies/turnovers should replace all other group meals
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
This story seems like it is everywhere on my science twitter, so I want to address some things
@hankgreen
Hank Green
2 years
This should get a Pulitzer. Knowing this is a huge step forward, even if the implications are devastating and deeply depressing.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@sweetentweeten @new_user_name12 @chicagosmayor @CTULocal1 how many vacuums does the average classroom have? have you considered which kinds of cleaning operations can generate tiny aerosols and what kind of PPE is advised when changing hospital air filters?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
although spite is a rare motivation for beginning a PhD, surveys show that 88% of PhD completion is driven at least in part by spite. Citation: I made it up, but you know I'm right
@TMPHopkins1
Tom Hopkins
3 years
Has anyone ever done a PhD out of spite?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
Unpopular opinion: if you are a basic scientist in biomedical work, you should not shift to doing Covid19 work (unless you were already working on *close* stuff, like other RNA enveloped viruses).
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
PSA: if the baby of the family has the tummy troubles, get yourself tested (ideally a few days later?). That was my first warning.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
I understand absolutely why people are focusing on the "you might not even know, this bans most abortions!" messaging, but really it bans *all* of them. You can't *get* an abortion before 6 weeks. The pills work best at 7, surgical is an option later.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@philritz1 @SipOfKoKo 58% of Americans are employed; of those 68% have a 401k, of those, 12% max (according to Vanguard). So at most, 4.7% of Americans (about 16 million people) max their 401k.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
@matthewfdesmond @JStein_WaPo @bernie @AriRabinHavt Oh it's fully explained. Whenever anyone is in *sufficient* pain to consult a doctor, they don't want it minimized. But if you answer "10" they assume you are Dramatic. It IS a bullshit question, even if common.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@ravenscimaven I feel like as a Culture we should just develop a coded leash system. Like "all dogs with red leashes are Do Not Pet"
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@markowenmartin it's the theranos machine. You put in a drop of blood, and measures every antibody you've ever had. It costs $4.5 billion dollars.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
Inheritance tax should be 100% above 10 million. I will not be taking questions.
@wealth
Bloomberg Wealth
3 years
Americans can expect to inherit $72.6 trillion over the next 25 years – but almost half that wealth will come from the top 1.5%
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
9 months
For a small fee, I will read your course evaluations, pull positive quotes for your tenure packet, and distill any negative but actionable advice into a 3-5 bullet item list.
@Prokaryota
Elisa Granato
9 months
For a small fee, I will reply "Not your best work 🫀" to your arch-enemy's paper announcement tweet
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
@chronicfab @MadLibrarySci My kiddo tried to say a Smug Boomer thing the first time we saw a mask, do not worry I shut it down. That said, do you have an N95 and have you done a fit test? Or are you just hoping all the infected but healthy feeling people see it and give you space?
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
@chronicfab @MadLibrarySci oh thank goodness! I did not know they even hand washable ones. Those are neat! I will... go out and NOT order one, since I am not immunocompromised :-)
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
About 330,000 cases of Covid are happening each day, that we are catching. Assuming each is infectious for 5 days (hahahaha), at least 5 in 1000 strangers you lick at NYE will have Covid. Only 1 in 10,000 eggs has Salmonella
@CDCgov
CDC
5 years
Tempted to have a bite of batter while baking? Raw dough and batter are never safe to eat, even if they don’t contain raw eggs. Learn more: .
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@jackallisonLOL 1) our Democracy should avoid having load bearing 87 year olds with metastatic cancer 2) there are like 50 different things that RBG has done in the past few years that "should" have done her in, not counting the 500 mandatory for her job 3) even so I'm kinda mad at the couple
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
@SarahCAndersen Everytime I think "Pixar movies are SO GOOD, why arent there more?" I remember how much goes into them
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
2 years
PSA: do you know a grad student who has to make their buffers? Save a life. Share the chart.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
9 years
"I think we're gonna need a bigger sample size" #scienceamoviequote
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
4 years
@profmusgrave Ok but it is actually the Great Depression for job opportunities right now. Any other year I'd agree, but this year people should consider how to take on the least total debt
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
8 years
All arrived safe and sound. Am recovering pretty well.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@gbosslet Ok but here's the thing. If I gets the Long Covid, do you have any idea how many doctors will not believe my home rapid test? Doctors wouldn't belive my home rapid test when I was pregnant, and insisted on their own rapid test *and* a transvaginal ultrasound.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
Son of a BITCH. It got me. (I'm "fine". Fatigue much more flu-like than cold-like). Rapid test blared my test line after like 15 seconds though. Bet I'm shedding like mad.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
3 years
@sebatlab The failures of postdocs to succeed at opening up a genuinely novel research direction is not PRIMARILY due to them being inept, but rather the inherent difficulty of creating new knowledge, and the high risk one takes creating it in a lower-resource environment
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
@LouisatheLast Bread and circuses. Not sure Netflix isnt subsidized by the government to provide distractions at key times. Like, we would've had a socialist revolution, but there are new episodes of The Good Place.
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@sciliz
A scientific lizard 🧬🦎
5 years
Dear academics- believe it or not most industry scientists do actually know this, but your suggestion they use a non-kit actually just conveys you do not understand FDA and CLIA regulations
@ACasadevall1
Arturo Casadevall
5 years
Time to go back to the old papers and learn how to isolate RNA without a kit. If you are of a certain age you learned how to do this with chemicals and it worked. Not hard to do and...unlike what happens with a kit...you knew what you were doing
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