rizcriz | too ugly to function @rizcriz Twitter profile

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

3 months

Disclaimer: if you see a prompt on my feed that I posted it’s free to take. Take it and do whatever you want with it I actively encourage it. In fact, if you write one, add it to the spreadsheet so people will see it!

USER RIZCRIZ HAS TOO MANY PROMPTS /pos

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

3 months

THATS MY PRESIDENT

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

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3 months

The night before Henry’s wedding he sneaks out to a pub all by himself. While there, a charming drunk American man takes the stool next to him—the American has no idea who he is. But he somehow knows all the right things to say to convince Henry to do two things:

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1 month

After the queen dies, Catherine, Pip and Bea all come to Henry to tell him something devastating. Catherine was going through Mary’s belongings and found something. “Can’t be worse than everything we already knew of her,” Henry quips. But they’re all deathly quiet. “What?”

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1 month

Alex realizing he wants to bang his on campus mortal enemy and can tell said mortal enemy is also interested so he offers it up. “Look, let’s get this sexual tension situated.” “Oh?” “You. Me. One night. Then we can be free and move on.”

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4 months

Henry has a ring doorbell on his apartment. Why does his cute neighbor who he’s never met constantly leave life updates on his doorbell? “Passed my LSATS!” “Worst date of my life.” “My sister is the devil. I’d kill for her.” Eventually Henry opens the door while he’s talking

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4 months

Alex telling his roommate who’s bent over trying to grab his keys he dropped. “I’m not gay, but your ass could probably turn me.” And Henry stands up and gives him a look, before saying, “do you hear yourself when you speak?” Alex just shrugs.

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@rizcriz

3 months

Omg what is Henry Fox doing in season 3 of bridgerton

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1 month

Alex going on a blind date—Henry’s in the restaurant and Alex approaches. “Hey, are you James?” And Henry blinks. “Yes.”

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2 months

Henry coming home from the shelter and finding Alex knocked out on the couch with their toddler curled up on his chest and David tucked up against their side. The toddlers awake. “Shhh,” she says, loudly. “Daddy’s sleepin’.” Henry nods and kneels in front of the couch,

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5 months

TW: su!cide attempt: Alex receives a call from Henry in the middle of the day. They’ve been broken up for a year ever since Henry made him leave Kensington. All communication has gone unreasoned to, and Henry’s set to be married to a lady of some sort by the end of the week.

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1 month

Alex and Henry deciding to do their vows at home alone the night before their wedding, sitting on the floor of their bedroom, legs crossed and hands held between them, because every other intimate of their life has been made public, they’re taking this for themselves.

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4 months

Alex and Henry are both doctors at the same hospital—everyone’s crushing on one or both of them. Imagine their surprise when randomly one day they witness Alex kiss Henry after a bad ending with a patient. They’ve been secretly married the whole time.

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3 months

Alex and Henry being obliviously in love with each other and one night they’re drunkenly watching bake off as is their weekend tradition and Alex rests his head on Henry’s shoulder. “Hen?” “Hm?” “Could… I mean. Would…” “What?” “Just once.” “Just once what?”

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4 months

David not liking anyone but Henry bc everyone Henry’s around before he moved to the states is kinda awful (except bea) and having trouble finding a roommate bc of it but then Alex walks through the door and during the roommate interview David curls up on Alex’s lap

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1 month

Alex and Henry starting casual relationship and Alex starting with a warning of “I’m terrrible at casual and I like you so don’t be surprised if I fall in love with you.” “Quite the warning.” “When I walk away it won’t be because I want to. That’s all I’m saying.”

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3 months

Casey ended the book with “we won” and blessed an entire fandom forever to never lose

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3 months

HE FOUND A BOOK

keely ☻

@liamsbloodymary

3 months

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

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2 months

In graduation day, Alex sees his college life nemesis standing alone, seemingly about ti cry after a phone call so Alex approaches. “Yaknow, generally people smile during graduation.” “Not now, Alex.” “Since when are you anti-fight with me? I need one last one for the road.”

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1 month

Henry wearing a plug to a crown event as an act of rebellion but then he runs into Alex and trips and the remote falls out of his pocket and Alex picks it up and is all “what’s this?” And like instinctively presses the button and Henry’s eyes go wide and he tenses

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17 days

Alex and Henry break up. A photo of them leaks but you can’t tell it’s Alex, only Henry. The crown decides to let Henry come out, on the condition they choose the man he’s out with. He and Alex have already broken up so he says yes.

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2 months

Newscaster Alex Claremont-Diaz being the internet’s famous news guy (bc of his blooper videos to start, but then comes the little stories he tells about his husband; in todays other, more exciting news, my husband…)

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20 days

Alex and Henry in the same zoom class. Nora’s over at Alex’s house during one of his classes behind the computer. Henry’s doing a presentation, and Alex clicks his tongue and says to Nora, “the things I’d do to him if he’d let me.” Henry stops talking. Alex wasn’t muted.

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3 months

Alex has a kid and works with Henry. They’re working on a big project so Henry comes to Alex’s house frequently. One day while Alex is cooking dinner, his daughter asks Henry, “Are you dating daddy?” And Henry smiles at her, whispers, “not just yet. I’d like to, though.”

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7 months

So uh. Arthur Fox? Writing letters to his children from his death bed? To be given to them on their wedding days?? Phillip doesn’t tell Bea or Henry about his so Henry’s completely shocked when his mom gives him the letter before the wedding

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

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25 days

Alex moves to London and gets a UK phone number. It just so happens to be the old phone number of Arthur Fox. Every holiday, anniversary, or important ever. Henry texts that number bc it’s been vacant since his dad died.

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1 month

Alex out with June and Nora, getting a text from his roommate about grocery shopping and he just freezes in the middle of the busy walk way and June and Nora are like ??? Alex, gobsmacked by the realization that he’s in love with Henry, standing there staring at his phone “uh”

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1 month

Alex befriending a kid he met online who claims to be “the prince of England” which is obviously a lie but Henry’s been his friend for years now and honestly it’s just a part of who he is, he’s blonde, intuitive as fuck, and thinks he’s the prince of England.

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4 months

a place in this world (i could belong) (Massive Massive Massive trigger warning for a main character suicide attempt)

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16 days

actor Henry going on live television to come out, in the process upsetting his very much in the closet boyfriend and costar and getting dumped for it. enter his friend who works on a show across the lot, ACD, who offers to come out as his (pretend) boyfriend -

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6 months

In a world where Henry has a twin brother, Alex is the /only/ person who without fail can correctly identify which is which. (He’s bffs with Henry’s twin, and enemies with Henry)

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3 months

Henry starts dating a guy who’s vaguely similar to Alex (hair, eyes, height) and Alex gets increasingly jealous and every time the guy does smth “impressive” Alex is just like “I can do that, I’ve done that.” He keeps taking up new hobbies and the lot and then the guy

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4 months

Drunk Henry, sober Alex. Alex hasn’t shaved in a day or so, drunk Henry is rest his head on Alex’s shoulder, nuzzling into Alex’s jaw. “What’re you doing?” “Mm… scratchy,” Henry hums, continuing to nuzzle, pressing little kisses into the skin. “ ‘like it.”

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3 months

Fuck it—hey prime? You know what would be a great way to celebrate the sequel? The Kensington breakfast deleted scene 👀👀👀

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3 months

Alex purposefully spreads a rumor around his college campus that he has a massive embarrassing huge crush on Henry Fox in order to get Henry Fox to notice him. As if being the lacrosse captain and everyone favorite it boy hasn’t already done that on its own.

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1 month

Alex and Henry watching magic mike and Alex declaring, “I could do that.” To which Henry, his platonic roommate, snorts. Alex gives him a /look/ before getting ip and grabbing a dining room chair and putting it in the middle of the living room. “I’ll prove it. Sit.”

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20 days

and so it begins

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2 months

Young Alex Claremont-Diaz finding a fan mail email address for Prince Henry that he’s convinced is fake but emails it anyway. He certainly didn’t intend to make lifelong friends with a fraud Prince Henry but they’re finally meeting in London and there’s an awful lot of security

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4 months

I want a fic where Alex is the one with a twin solely so someone, probably Phillip, can say, “Christ, there’s two of them?”

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5 months

And if Alex started acting out after the divorce and Ellen and Oscar sent him to a British boarding school to protect their political reputation and there he met Prince Henry and became one of his boarding school conquests before being promptly dumped like all the others

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4 months

Alex owns a flower shop and handles the flower deliveries. He frequently has deliveries for Pez at the shelter from their many, many admirers. Alex notices Henry tucked away in his office or playing with the kids or reading during story time during the deliveries

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1 month

Henry getting broken up with while in line for coffee and the ex storming out. The hot barista witnessing everything, taking Henry’s dazed order and then immediately going on break. Henry sitting in a corner with his tea when said hot barista flops into the chair across him

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3 months

Roommates Alex and Henry who are super close. Henry says something that makes Alex roll his eyes and he pokes Henry in the side like “come on,” but then Henry giggles and Alex realizes— “Oh my god you’re ticklish.” “I most certainly am not.” “Oh yeah?” “Yes.” “Prove it.”

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

3 months

Hey guys There’s gonna be a sequel. We won the fan favorite glaad award. There’s still the Emmy’s and all the future bts content for the sequel and the eventual promo tour for the sequel and I can’t wait to experience all of it with you

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6 months

Henry and his PPOS go to a coffee shop and cut the line and Alex, late for class and pissed is all “what are you? The queen of England?” And Henry’s like “the prince, actually.”

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1 month

Alex is the planner hired for a massive charity gala for Pez and Henry’s charity. Henry keeps his distance but Alex is constantly seeking him out for seemingly obvious choices. Eventually Henry’s all “isn’t this your job??” And Alex is like “oh. Sorry I—thought—

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3 months

Hey guys Guys Hey Fancy another slice????

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5 months

🫣

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3 months

Alex meaning to text Nora when he sends “I need to get laid so bad it’s not even funny” and doesn’t realize he’s sent it to Henry—his sisters best friend who he seldom talks to—until he gets a “am I meant to be the cure in this instance or?” In reply

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4 years

@dylanobrien It’s so funny bc they’re just painting over the letters which means it will still say black lives matter when they’re done, just in a different color

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2 months

Alex and Henry laying on the floor of their living room lamenting their love lives. “Life would be so much easier if you loved me.” Henry turns to look at Alex, frowning. “Would it?” Alex nods. “I’d never have to love anyone else.”

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3 months

ROAST HIM MADAM PRESIDENT

Deadline Hollywood

@DEADLINE

3 months

Uma Thurman takes a selfie with her #RedWhiteAndRoyalBlue co-stars Nicholas Galitzine and Taylor Zakhar Perez #PrimeFYC | Deadline Studio At Prime Experience

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2 months

Established relationship Alex and Henry but nobody believes they’re together bc they act the same as they always have and Henry’s kinda tired of people trying to get Alex dates so he grabs Alex in front of all their friends and kisses him hard. Pulls away and says, “understood?”

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4 months

Actor Henry Fox going on hot ones and doing so incredibly terribly and Alex is a fan with a large following who tweets, “if you wanted to get spicy without getting burned, IM RIGHT HERE” It goes viral. Henry ultimately replies. “Where’s ‘here’?”

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4 months

Listen, Emmy voters, I don’t know who you are, but you have one job. Do it for the gays, Emmy voters, do it for the gays

marta ❁

@galitzinecmfort

4 months

"Red, White and Royal Blue" enters Variety's Emmy predictions in the Television Movie category. #RWRB @RWRBonPrime —

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3 months

Author Henry who’s queer romance blows up who’s asked during an interview if he has any picks if his book ever gets pick up for a movie and he blushes and says “I have a vision for <insert MCs name here>. Alex Claremont-Diaz is the blueprint.”

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3 months

And if there’s only one bed—

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2 months

Henry getting a physical letter while visiting London from Alex. “I missed writing you, and I’m so full of love for you that it’s about to burst out of me and we just got off the phone but I want to write to you, and obviously email is off the table. So I hope this finds you

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4 months

Alex and Henry have been dads for years now. They find their daughter in a state of distress and ask her what’s wrong. Turns out the father daughter dance at her school is coming up, and she’s been stressing over which one to ask because she doesn’t want to hurt either

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2 months

Alex and Henry are sitting in the living room reading, and Henry hears Alex go, “Huh.” In this kind of awestruck tone and Henry looks up from his book. “Everything all right?” Alex nods slowly. “I think I’m in love with you?” “Pardon?”

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5 months

Okay last sneak peek and then I’ll leave yall alone until I finish it

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2 months

Henry kisses Alex and things go further. It becomes a Thing; Henry comes to Alex’s room; Alex goes to Henry’s room. They have sex, they go out. They make out. Henry thinks they’re Together. Alex thinks Henry wants this to be casual, and is fighting his every instinct

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2 months

While at a news years party, Henry kisses his roommate at mignight in a “well might as well it won’t mean anything but I’ll know what it feels like” way Only said roommate is hyperfixated on the way Henry’s lips had moved against his and Henry walks into the apartment one day

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25 days

Henry and Bea (mainly Bea) operate a David insta account. Henry’s taken more interest as of late because of this *one* account that likes every David post as soon as it’s up. So what if he’s started taking pics with himself in it to see if that garners as much immediate attention

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1 month

Philip giving a surprise toast at their wedding, he’s quiet for a moment after he grabs the mic and then he just starts chuckling. “Do you know,” he says, “I don’t think we’d be here today if not for Alex and Henry falling into my wedding cake. I was angry then, but

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17 days

Alex, after getting dumped, choosing to stay single because he knows he’ll never love like h that again, and thinking that once Henry’s out he’ll come back to him. Only there he is, six months later, on the front page with another man.

7

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

25 days

Alex, in a fit of desperation to find the hot Brit he shared a drink with at the airport between flights, goes on Reddit and does a missed connection post. Pez, having heard all about Beautiful Alex, finds the whole scenario oddly familiar and sends the post to Henry.

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24 days

Prince Henry going up for auction for a respectable bachelors auction for charity and June winning a date with him but getting sick and sending Alex in her wake bc Nora’s also sick. Alex showing up like “sorry,” And Henry being gobsmacked bc he expected a woman not Danger

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4 months

Henry has a crush on his and Alex’s neighbor and Alex is getting increasingly jealous. Henry comes home one day and falls against the door all dramatically and is all “he talked to me~” and Alex is offended and is like “how come you never had a crush on /me/?”

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1 month

Officially, Alex’s favorite sport is lacrosse. Unofficially, when he was 17 he stumbled across a stream of a Polo match with the most beautiful man he’s ever seen killing it for his team. Unofficially, he’s been following that polo team for several years.

2

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6 months

Child star Alex who played Arthur’s son on tv. Henry who hates Alex because he got so much more time with Arthur because of the show. Alex who loves Henry because of every little thing Arthur shared about him.

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3 months

The American doesn’t seem to perturbed. “Hm. Homewrecker. That’s a new one for me.” And Henry laughs. “Hardly. That’s also not the exciting bit.” “Oh?” “I’m the prince of wales?” “The prince—as in the one who’s supposed to be getting married today?” “The very one.”

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5 months

Alex finding out that the reigning monarch has to approve of any royal marriages so he finagles a meeting with her. “Here’s the deal. I love him. You don’t have to understand that. You don’t even have to like it. But you are going to give your approval, otherwise

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2 months

Henry turns Alex away at KP. Alex keeps emailing Henry without Henry knowing bc he logged out of the email account and never logged back in for his own sanity. He learns about the emails when all of their emails get leaked, and Alex’s heartache is front page.

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5 months

The gang talking about marriage one night and Alex is all “nah I’m never getting married” (he and Bea high five) he takes a sip of his drink and then shrugs, “actually, I’d marry hen if he asked.” “What?” “Yeah. I think Henry’s the only one I’d consider marrying.” “Me??”

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3 months

Alex bursts into his and Henry’s apartment “where’s my favorite roommate?” Henry emerges from the kitchen with a cup of tea. “Of course, in his natural habitat. Anyways, February 14. You. Me. This fancy place downtown. Already reserved it.”

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3 months

Okay so now we campaign for the trilogy yes?

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3 months

“He doesn’t post on—“ “he wasn’t—“ “you’re making excuses—“ He literally signed on for the sequel shUT UP AND ENJOY THE MOMENT MY GOD

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1 month

Zahra, in her wedding dress giving Alex and Henry a verbal beat down. “If there’s even a drop of frosting that escapes that cake—“ Shaan, standing beside her, grinning and besotted with her. Alex and Henry staring at her wide eyes, their hands held between them.

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6 months

Alex and Henry at a club, Alex asking Henry “how am I supposed to get plowed tonight when the hottest guy here is my best friend?” And Henry replying, “you could ask your best friend.” And Alex kind of staring at him for a beat before going all husky and saying “I could?”

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4 months

Alex falls asleep against Henry on the couch during roommate movie night. Which is no biggie it happens all the time. It’s just. Alex is having a wet dream and moaning a bit into Henry’s shoulder and moving a bunch and Henry’s maybe losing his mind

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4 months

Au where Alex is an accident of some sort—Perhaps he’s gotten reckless since he and Henry broke up—but Ellen takes his phone while he’s in the hospital. Those first few days/hours are rough, there’s no certainties that Alex’ll pull through. So Ellen calls Henry.

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5 months

Arthur finds Phillip &Bea at an event whispering in a corner and wants to know what they’re doing “Hen has a crush on the first son,” says Bea. “And the first son keeps looking at him,” says Phillip. Arthur looks between them. “I suppose we’ve work to do, then.”

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6 months

‼️Gather round RWRB fans! It’s the 6 month anniversary of RWRB and time to remind @PrimeVideo we’re still watching! Get #RWRBmovie trending again with a global watch party. We’re recreating the magic of August 10th. February 10th. 8pm EST. Spread the word. #Happy6MonthsRWRB ‼️

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3 months

June and Nora are getting married. Alex and Henry have a pep talk with each other before the reception. “So we’re agreed. Stay away from the cake.” “At all cost.”

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2 months

Former first son Alex Claremont-Diaz reveals what’s in his pockets for a buzzfeed interview. It’s all totally normal things bc obv he prepared for this, but they get to his wallet and he reveals a picture of him and Henry tucked delicately in the sleeve. He smiles.

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4 months

Henry’s just moved into a new apartment, the main window faces the courtyard separating the two sections of the building. He was focused on the garden down below when he picked the apartment. But.

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5 months

Phillip and Alex work together. Phillip’s got a family portrait on his desk. “Who is /that/?” “Bea? You’ve met Bea. And I’ll remind you she’s not interested.” “Not Bea. Tall, Blond, and Beautiful.” “Oh, that’s Henry.” “/Thats/ the Henry you tried setting me up with?!”

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4 months

Henry tells Alex he’s moving out as an April fools prank, it seems harmless at the time. Only Alex actually looks kind of devastated by the idea of not living together anymore. “Hey—I was joking. It was a prank?” “You’re not leaving?” “No. I love—living with you.”

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3 months

Alex and Henry meet in art class—they have. Crush on each other but don’t really speak until they get paired for a partner project where they’re meant to paint one another. Henry admits to struggling. A: “cmon am I that ugly?”

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3 months

Alex and Henry are at a college party. Henry’s wandered off for drink refills and Alex is in the thick of a game called confessions. Confess a secret or drink. Henry’s gone so he feels safe to say, “sometimes I think about what it’d be like to kiss my roommate. Sometimes

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@rizcriz

2 months

Roommates Alex and Henry. They don’t really ever talk or anything and Alex has had enough of it. He hops onto the couch in just a pair of boxers and holds his arms out for Henry. “Come on. Skin to skin. Like you do with newborns.” “…pardon?” “Gonna get to know each other.”

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

3 months

Sir I’m so disappointed in you rn

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

3 months

Okay so Beas wedding? They knock the cake over again. They spend most of the night avoiding it like the plague but then it comes time to cut it and she pulls them up after the first slice and Alex is teasing Henry and Henry rolls his eyes and playfully shoves Alex

2

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

8 months

LOOK WHAT MY FRIEND MADE ME I AM CRYING

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

4 months

Alex and Henry are in an open relationship bc it started as friends with benefits and they’re both too scared to make things official but neither of them take advantage of the open part of their relationship but then Pez convinces Henry to go on a date bc he doesn’t know

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

5 months

I lost my train of thought noooo

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

4 months

13

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rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

6 months

WHAT THE TUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAY THE FUCK WHAY THE FUCK WGAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FCUK WHAT THE FUCK WHAY THE FUCK

7

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623

rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

25 days

Alex scrolling on TikTok and coming across a hot blonde guy reading to his beagle on live. He’s never watched a live before but here he is a month later having made space and time for that man’s every live that only like 10 other people watch, well.

2

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624

rizcriz | too ugly to function

@rizcriz

24 days

Henry “just moved from the uk and have no money until I get access to my trust in a few years” Fox and Alex “overworked attorney with a big house” Claremont-Diaz Alex comes home from work, miraculously, early one day and literally crashes into Henry in the living room

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