Spent ages digging for coal and finally found a little bit. It was a miner success. Puns and one liners on the theme of Coal Jokes....

Great Eggspectations. A classic novel by Charles Chickens... Saw the world's largest egg this week. That will take some beating. Egg Jokes

Got a great book about tribute bands. I read it from cover to cover. Puns and one liners about Tribute Band Jokes...

I do enjoy playing "telekinetic snooker". However, you've got to be in the right frame of mind for it. Corny jokes, puns and one liners.

I do enjoy playing "telekinetic snooker". However, you've got to be in the right frame of mind for it. Corny jokes, puns and one liners.

A swan walks into a pub, and the barman says "I named my pub after you." The swan says "you called your pub Dave?" Pub Jokes....

I do enjoy playing "telekinetic snooker". However, you've got to be in the right frame of mind for it. Corny jokes, puns and one liners.

I went game fishing today. Came back with two ludo sets, a Monopoly, a Cluedo and a Scrabble set. Puns and one liners on the theme of Fishing Jokes...

Got camping insurance but apparently if someone steals my tent in the middle of the night I'm no longer covered. Tent Jokes....

This week’s puns and one liners are all on the topic of Bee Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Friend of mine keeps taking all of one letter out of the...

Friend of mine won the Phillipines National Origami championship. He's a Manila folder. Puns and one liners on the theme of Origami Jokes...

A dictator complained fiercely about the neck wear he received. What a tie rant. I gambled on a giraffe race the other day. Mine came second. Lost by a neck. It was nowhere near. Neck Jokes...

Friend of mine just lost his job as a hacker. I told him there are plenty more phish in the C: Hacker Jokes...

Saw a squirrel having a boxing match with a hedgehog in my garden. The hedgehog won on points. Squirrel Jokes...

Saw Darth Vader looking disappointed working out of the phone shop. They didn't have the androids he was looking for. Disappointing Jokes.

The king asked his fool for a joke and the fool just shrugged. He was the court gesture. King jokes...

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on 'Finding Bigfoot'. The librarian directs him to the large print section. Library jokes...

Delighted to have won the local fancy dress competition dressed as a bee.  I'm still buzzing. Some puns and one liners on the topic of Insect Jokes

Went for dinner with the zoo animals the other day. They didn’t all bring their wallets, I ended up paying the lion’s share. Cat Jokes...

Saw a group of people competing to see who could end up putting most knots in a series of ropes. They ended up tied. Rope jokes...

I saw an Irish dancing show today called 'Streamdance'. It's not quite as good as 'Riverdance', but then it is only a tributary act. Dance Jokes...

"At the third stroke, it will be six o'clock, my precious." My new Tolkein Clock. Clock Jokes...

I used to do a bad impression of Eric Morecambe, but now I've seen the error of my waheys. Corny Jokes, puns and one liners...

Why don't monks vacuum in the corners of monasteries? They have no attachments. Puns and one liners on the theme of Monk Jokes.

A friend was struggling with their baking, so I offered to help them make it rise. It was the yeast I could do. Yeast Jokes...

Bought a friend a fridge for his birthday. You should have seen his face light up when he opened it. Birthday Jokes......

I was asked at an interview to describe myself in three words. I said "not very good at following instructions". Interview Jokes....

Singing in the shower is great until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it's more of a soap opera. One liners on the theme of Shower Jokes..

Went shopping online for a new toaster, and found a specialist site for it, but gave up. Got too many pop ups. Internet jokes.

What do you get if you cross Captain America with the Incredible Hulk? The Star Spangled Banner. Star Jokes...

Saw a sign for a beginner's yoga class. It said "enquire within".... Yoga Jokes.

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Brick Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       How do you hire a horse? Put a brick under each hoof.   Had some...

Bought a new television remote control with fifty buttons. I was quite surprised they allowed me to pay with buttons. Remote Control Jokes..

I started composing a song for Spandau Ballet, but then I found it hard to write the next line. Puns and one liners on the theme of Line Jokes

Spotted a lizard on a portable toilet. Suspect it was a commode-o-dragon. Jokes, puns and one liners on the theme of Dragon Jokes...

What programme do you use to predict the music tastes of former US presidential candidates? An Al Gore Rhythm. Programmer Jokes...

Bought a new television remote control with fifty buttons. I was quite surprised they allowed me to pay with buttons. Remote Control Jokes..

A friend of mine has taken up eating watches, but takes forever to get through each one. It's time consuming. Time Jokes...

I used to think the film Alien was about the traumas of making a cup of tea. “I can’t open this milk!” “In space, no one can. Here, use cream.” Milk Jokes

I think the ghost in the chicken coop was a poultrygheist.. Ghost Jokes....

A ship load of blue crashed into a ship load of red paint. The crews were marooned. A series of puns and one liners on the theme of Ship Jokes

I was asked at an interview to describe myself in three words. I said "not very good at following instructions". Interview Jokes....

A friend of mine loses his cool every time he tries to arrange his shirts in the wardrobe. I think he needs some help with hangar management. Shirt Jokes...

Darth has a sister who's going up in the world, Ellie Vader. Star Wars jokes...

ook my giant spoon to my cooking class last night. It caused quite a stir. Puns and one liners on the theme of Giant Jokes...

A man says "I keep finding custard in one ear, and jelly in the other". The doctor says "I'm afraid you are a trifle deaf". Dessert Jokes...

A friend used to be addicted to drinking detergent, but he's clean now. Puns and one liners on the theme of Addiction jokes

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Herb Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…       Great to hear The Doctor’s new herb range has won awards. He is a...

Tried to tell the doctor I'd hurt my hand opening French sparkling wine, he told me it was a sham pain. Pain Jokes...

A friend of mine loses his cool every time he tries to arrange his shirts in the wardrobe. I think he needs some help with hangar management. Shirt Jokes...

A bald friend had some rabbits tattooed on his head. They look like hares from a distance. Tattoo Jokes....

I saw a singing fish once in the Choral Reef. Fish Jokes...

Was arguing with a friend over a curry when the waiter ran over and grabbed the pickles and rice. I wish he’d stop taking sides. Pickle Jokes...

A couple of friends have opened their doors recently a been slapped by a large, obnoxious spider. There's a nasty bug going around. Door Jokes...

Wore my new jacket to see the local bonfire and it burst into flames. Started as a smoking jacket, ended as a blazer. Bonfire jokes...

Saw a monster at a party who was an amazing dancer. Think he was the boogie man. Puns and one liners on the theme of Monster Jokes...

This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Dash Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality… What’s the longest morse code message? The 100 yard dash. Ok, got to go...

Went to a space themed party, and the burgers were better than normal. They were a little meteor. Puns and one liners on the theme of Burger Jokes...

The king asked his fool for a joke and the fool just shrugged. He was the court gesture. King jokes...

Tried to find the birthplace of the person who invented a toothbrush. Couldn’t find the plaque. Puns on the theme of Brush Jokes....

Going to a recycling party this weekend. The invite said to bring a bottle. Bottle jokes, ready for the Christmas Party season....

What do you call a parrot with an umbrella? Polly unsaturated. Umbrella Jokes...

A new tennis player goes to the library and asks for books about aces. "No way", says the librarian, "you won't return them". Tennis Jokes....

Of course, it's not a real sponge cake unless you've had to borrow all the ingredients. Puns and one liners on the theme of sponge jokes.

I was driving down a road that was surfaced with emeralds, rubies and diamonds. I think it was a jewel carriageway. Puns and one liners on the theme of Jewelry Jokes

I saw an Irish dancing show today called 'Streamdance'. It's not quite as good as 'Riverdance', but then it is only a tributary act. Dance Jokes...

A friend showed me the impressive model of Mount Everest that he had just built. I asked if it was to scale, he said, "no, just to look at". Scale Jokes...

A friend showed me the impressive model of Mount Everest that he had just built. I asked if it was to scale, he said, "no, just to look at". Scale Jokes...

Worst thing about millipedes playing football is how long it takes them to put their boots on. Puns and one liners on the theme of Boot Jokes...

A friend bought a new wig before going on holiday, so I got him a comb as a parting gift. Presents Jokes....

I was in a shop the other day, and there was an empty tester bottle of perfume with a sign saying "out of odour". Sign Jokes...

Got sent wedding photos by email but I couldn't open them. I always have problems with emotional attachments. Wedding Jokes...

Farmer thought that the barn he kept his chickens in was haunted. Had to call an eggsorcist. Turns out it was a poultrygeist. Barn Jokes...

My pet snake is 3.14 metres long. He's a πthon. Bottle of venom walks into a bar. Barman says "sorry mate, we don't serve snakebite in here". Snake Jokes

Heard a microchip making all sorts of awful puns. Turns out it was made of silly cone. Puns and one liners on the theme of Cone Jokes.

Got a pair of spider silk trousers. They look great, but the flies keep getting stuck. Puns and one liners on the theme of trouser jokes...

Unscrewed a lightbulb earlier. I was delighted. Light Jokes...

A friend has bought an old plane, taken the wings off, and turned it into a restaurant. I don’t think it will take off. Some puns on the topic of plane jokes

Needing paper, I went in a shop, and said to the assistant, "Do you keep stationary"? She said "No, I move about a bit". Shopping Jokes.

A clown held a door open for me the other day. I thought, "what a nice jester". Clown Jokes.

A friend of mine has a vegetable patch. It stops the cravings for turnips all day. Puns and one liners on the theme of turnip jokes

Was in a friend's garage and he had a Delorean. I asked if he used it much, he said he only drives it from time to time. Garage Jokes....

A swan walks into a pub, and the barman says "I named my pub after you." The swan says "you called your pub Dave?" Pub Jokes....

A chap goes to the doctor and says "I keep seeing a vampire, with big teeth and a cloak". The doctor says, "have you seen a psychiatrist?" The man says "no, just a vampire". Dracula Jokes: Some one...

Owls don't like mating in winter. It's often too wet to woo.  Owl Jokes...

I'm reading a book about a short ballerina. The girl with the dragging tutu. A cheesy one-liner collection, which may make you groan more than laugh...

What network is Luke Skywalker on? Yodafone What's the most popular network in Yorkshire? T'Mobile. Puns and one liners on the theme of phone jokes...