lord crunkington III 🇵🇭 @postcrunk Twitter profile

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

19 days

roll #1 is up!

lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

1 month

crossfaded taking double exposures… brought 3 rolls and i intend to use them all

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Last Seen Profiles

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

1980's: nerds suck 1990's: nerds are lame 2000's: being a nerd is cool now! 2018: on second thought, maybe people who feel a smug superiority to everyone else because of the niche esoteric hobbies they define their lives by are actually insufferable to be around

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@postcrunk

8 years

Biden: These memes are just an illusory escape from the public's feelings of utter powerlessness and uncertainty right now Obama: Joe...

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

6 years

watching porn but then you notice a scar on her forearm. you start to wonder how she got it. maybe a burn. you imagine her entire life. the town she grew up in. you aren't even horny anymore. just entangled in this notion of capitalist alter-egos vs true selves. you cum anyway.

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

During this pandemic there are only 4 social classes: Billionaire Zoom user Essential employee Unemployed

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@LucyXIV america did this weird thing where they combined family/country/religious/brand loyalty into one patriotic emotion so shit like this really gets them in their feelings

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

me: i don't give a fuck also me: i will spend years reliving this moment in detail so excruciating that i cannot breathe

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

it's really cool to be alive in america at this point in history because it's like the collapse of the roman empire but with wi-fi

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@postcrunk

10 years

first no tooth fairy then no santa and no god and then your parents are only human your government is corrupt and the universe is a hologram

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@postcrunk

7 years

no contact with other humans = loneliness any contact with other humans = anxiety

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@postcrunk

9 years

PERSON: how have you been? YOU: *recall feeling entire spectrum of human emotion from highest highs to the deepest depths* YOU: fine. you?

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY TO EMOTIONALLY WRITE OFF ANY HUMAN BEING WHO DOESN'T FIT INTO MY IDEOLOGICAL NARRATIVE

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

WHO NEEDS EMOTIONS WHEN YOU CAN JUST SPEND YOUR ENTIRE LIFE GRADUALLY ADAPTING TO THE SOCIOPATHIC TENDENCIES NECESSARY TO SURVIVING CAPITALISM INSTEAD

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

6/12/1967: interracial marriage is legal in america 6/26/2015: same sex marriage is legal in america

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@postcrunk

7 years

went from slave labor to child labor to sweatshop labor to undocumented labor to prison labor &no one says "capitalism only works in theory"

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

hi. i'm physically incapable of relaxing. how are you?

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

america is where nobody gives a fuck but everybody's offended

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@postcrunk

11 years

our biggest mistake is pretending all of this is normal and not accepting the beautiful insane surreal tragedy of earthbound existence

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

6 years

HISTORY OF THE USA: 1600s: FUCK NATIVE AMERICANS 1700s: FUCK AFRICANS 1800s: FUCK IRISH AND CHINESE PEOPLE 1850s: FUCK MEXICANS 1900s: FUCK WOMEN, ITALIANS, & GAYS 1940s: FUCK JAPANESE PEOPLE 1950s: FUCK COLOREDS 2000s: FUCK MUSLIMS 2018: it's hard being a straight white man 😰

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

it's always "is looting a good look for the black community?" and never "was 400 years of capture, enslavement, family separation, housing/employment discrimination, and state-sanctioned murder a good look for the white community?"

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

thank each of your ancestors for successfully passing on their genes for millions of years so we could sit in front of screens feeling lost

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

2 years

@newypost she said

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

what a cosmic joke to unwillingly appear in a universe and be unable to afford it

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

hold on, let me just compartmentalize these emotions to continue functioning in society real quick

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

getting enraged by something, growing passionate about it, becoming apathetic toward it, and forgetting it all in a single 24hour news cycle

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

i can't stop binge watching the slow motion collapse of civilization as we know it

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@jaboukie the writing in this season is kinda unrealistic 😕

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

that weird planet where apelike creatures evolved and killed each other over abstract concepts like numbers and outer epidermal layer color

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

the world's on fire and everyone's just trying to go viral describing the fire

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

white people be like "these reusable grocery bags will make up for thousands of years of imperialism"

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

baby's first smile baby's first steps baby's first words baby's first realization of its socioeconomic status

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@bocxtop we really pay for them to have 200 days off and subsidize 70% of their healthcare for them to say "hmmm are these poors getting TOO much? 🤔

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@natetweetsbad @m91ik @ech0astral “yeah i’m from manhattan”

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@MissMeganMilan katrina all over again. it’s “finding” not looting when white people do it.

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@jaboukie bro out here looking like an 80's movie bully that's about to sabotage the whole ski trip 🙄

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

war on drugs: we can stop illegal drug use gun control: criminals are going to get guns no matter what, so why bother?

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

netflix and reevaluate every aspect of your existence

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

living in the golden age of anxiety and comfort food

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

fifty shades of grey is a reminder that we're all being brutally fucked by billionaires

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

if you need me, i'll be over here minimizing others' pain in an attempt to avoid facing the reality of my own personal traumas... thanks

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

if the universe didn't need you, you wouldn't be here

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

2 years

@pjayevans not to judge but you really should be learning simlish in this economy

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

i have trust issues with reality

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

oh my god becky, look at our absurd existence

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

my retirement plan is the fall of capitalism

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

6 years

teens: i'm going to CHANGE the world! 20s: i'm going to IMPRESS the world! 30s: i'm going to... attempt to continue surviving the world

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

dissociating from your emotions in order to work and afford shelter so you have a place to reconnect to your emotions by creating art

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

birth outfit montage death

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@postcrunk

4 years

jeff bezos has made $24 billion during quarantine

Michael Sainato

@msainat1

4 years

Whole Foods is giving workers a new work uniform shirt with "hero" on the front and "hardcore" on the back as hundreds of workers have gotten sick and at least 2 have died from coronavirus for just a $2 an hr wage increase

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

nah, we don't need universal healthcare. watching friends and family gofundme major surgeries and funeral costs is perfectly acceptable.

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

wake up in america like 'will i get killed by a cop or a mass shooter today?'

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

there's nothing wrong with just wanting to eat, travel, and fuck for the rest of your life

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

6 years

stages of white acceptance of black slang (AAVE): 1. Refusal “That’s ignorant/not real English.” 2. Ironic usage “Me and bae so TURNT UP rn. Lol not really just listening to NPR” 3. Sincere usage “It’s lit” 4. Brand usage McDonalds: #SquadGoals Wendys: this aint it chief

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

baby boomers had the worst memes: hang in there cat, never give up frog, trickle down theory, destroy the economy with your unbridled hubris

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

this is the part of monopoly where one person owns everything on the board and it's not fun anymore so you either pack up the game or someone flips over the table

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

5 years

charging your phone at work for free is the only social safety net americans have

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

surely there's no racism or sexism in a society that decided god is a white male human

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

anxiety is the price we pay for constant instant information

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

6 years

millennial success is being the least depressed person in your friend group

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

i came i saw i got various rushes of dopamine from specific behaviors

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

6 years

being in your 30s is weird because every day is a battle of ❌ should I go back to school? ❌ should I have kids? ❌ should I update my résumé and pursue a “real” career? ✅ or should I just get really high and go to target?

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

11 years

my favorite drugs are sunlight and memory

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

all i want is an economic system that doesn't turn having a body into a financial burden

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

give me one contrived media narrative i can feign outrage at as a brief escape from an existence defined by consumption and labor, please

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

cash me outside the socioeconomic and cultural implications of why this meme got popular how bow dah

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

coping with depression by converting it to lust works until you orgasm & are left with the same chasm of emptiness that's always been there

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

the future that liberals want

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@postcrunk

6 years

i'm bad at capitalism because i believe all human beings regardless of ability to work, intelligence, mental health status, or unique talent are deserving of food, shelter, and health care by virtue of being alive

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

nostalgia for the past detachment from the present anxiety for the future

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

TAKE A SHOT EVERY TIME A CONSERVATIVE USES CHICAGO AS A SCAPEGOAT EXCUSING AMERICA'S PERVASIVE GUN VIOLENCE WHILE IGNORING THE FACT MINORITIES WERE SEGREGATED TO SOUTH SIDE NEIGHBORHOODS, ECONOMICALLY SEQUESTERED, AND LEFT TO DIE DECADES BEFORE THE GANG VIOLENCE WE KNOW TODAY

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

IF WE JUST KEEP IGNORING OUR DEEP STRUCTURAL PROBLEMS AND ONLY TREATING THE SYMPTOMS, I'M SURE EVERYTHING WILL FIX ITSELF EVENTUALLY

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

another day, another set of social interactions to spend years unwillingly reliving and analyzing

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

being a temporary flesh vessel for an inexplicable consciousness is so on trend right now

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

the elves are sweatshop children the reindeer are truck drivers and santa claus is a multinational corporation

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

i reject your reality and substitute my phone

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

10 years

pumpkin spice tear gas

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

so this whole denying the human condition to benefit an economic system thing is going pretty alright i guess

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

the most dangerous thing about the internet is you can always find someone to validate your horribly toxic worldview

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

everyone 'saving money for the future' is sure gonna be embarrassed when we are all instantly vaporized in the shadow of a nuclear holocaust

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@onethouwow @icedoutomnitrix fuck around and get called a moon cricket

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

you have the right to assemble, but you will be maced, attacked by dogs, shot with rubber bullets, and blasted with water cannons

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

so if i commute to a job i hate for 50 years to afford a family that resents me i can do what i want for maybe 10 years? where do i sign up?

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

a republican shooting you in head while a democrat fights for your right to get shot in the leg is basically what voting in a 2 party system is like

The Recount

@therecount

4 years

Biden today on police training: "Instead of standing there and teaching a cop when there's an unarmed person comin' at 'em with a knife or something to shoot 'em in the leg instead of the heart is a very different thing."

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

THE DAB IS THE ANTITHESIS OF THE NAZI SALUTE

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

4 years

@zackfox future school shooter type beat

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

you know what's cool? doing demeaning things and compromising your values on a daily basis just to barely afford basic food and shelter

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

early 20's: i'll be famous and change the world with my major! late 20's: maybe i can feed myself through sporadic paid work in my field!

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

too busy trying to prove each other wrong to listen to one another

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

9 years

bitch better have my childlike sense of wonder

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

7 years

there’s no way that chip brand intentionally baited the public with an obviously sexist product so they could get an entire day of free advertisements through the articles, memes, and tweets generated in our daily outrage content cycle... is there?

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk

8 years

me: life is an insurmountable series of obstacles resulting in death *smokes* me: life is a profound journey of heartbreak, discovery, & joy

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lord crunkington III 🇵🇭

@postcrunk