High End Esc*rt @parody_escort Twitter profile

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

My favorite appointments are where my patrons and I can slurp oysters and hate on the homeless together. ❤️

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

SEX WORKERS Today I’m being interviewed by FOX News about sex work. I’ll be discussing how high my rates are, the clientele I attract, and how this work pays for my investments. Feel free to give me some more talking points!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

2 months

I've officially reached the highest level of honor in this career... he booked me the same day as his vasectomy so I could be his last full ejaculation.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

My whale just sent me an entire year’s worth of rent and doesn’t expect anything for it! We haven’t even met yet! There are truly some altruistic, AMAZING men living in this world.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

New cancellation policy! 🚨 My new cancellation fee will now be $30,000. You must cancel 2 MONTHS ahead of the time we meet, or you will be charged this cancellation fee. Any questions can be directed towards my assistant that I haven’t paid in 3 weeks.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

2 months

He said the normal paper envelopes from the bank made it feel too transactional. Honey, whatever makes you comfortable.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Actual photo of me on my suitor’s private jet this Saturday! What were you poors doing this weekend?

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

Wow! This rando guy saw me at Agent Provocateur trying on £2,000 worth of lingerie and decided to buy everything I liked! I gave him my business card and now I’m flying out to see him for a week for 50k! Dreams really do come true if you work hard, ladies!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

THOU HAST SUMMONED ME FROM THE DEAD.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

🚨 CLIENTS! There is a reputable provider going around stealing $50k worth of deposits! I know this because fun2fuck69 told me on Twitter. Guard your wallet and see good providers like me instead! #pickme

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

For $3000/hr I can teach you how to screen. Trying to be more generous to this community and extend a helping hand at a fair and low price!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I tell everyone what I do for a living, including strangers! On planes, on trains, on boats. I give them my business cards. My entire family knows, including my third cousins! I even tell the police and pay them off afterwards.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Doing sex work for the money cheapens it and makes it seem so dirty. My clients know that I do it because I love being around them so much. No way I’d ever use them for their wallets!!! Men aren’t ATM machines, ladies. They have feelings. They matter.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

11 Madison Park. Tomatoes doused in luxurious olive oil and miniature basil leaves. So unique and expensive that not even the poors can replicate this rare, exquisite dish. 💅

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I’m not a hooker, I’m a geriatric penis priestess, a temptress of trysts, a siren of semen, a duchess of dick, an elf of ecstasy, a fellatio fairy.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

16 days

Updated date packages moving forward! Five 4 hr dinner dates: $50,000 Five overnight dates: $75,000 Five 24 hr dates: $100,000 80% deposit. Contract valid for 1 month after the first date.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

No, this is not the type of selfie that is acceptable for screening, as I have already stated in the 3 previous emails 🙃 my nerves are being tested daily lmao.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Just got drinks with another provider. Ladies, it’s time to stop it with the extreme face editing! I can’t believe clients want to see her because I had secondhand embarrassment and had to dip out early. No wonder bad reviews are rampant!! 🤮

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

Booked a six hour date with a client. We couldn’t even make it to dinner without tackling each other to the ground. I made him eat me out for 2 hours straight. He had to cancel our dinner at Sons & Daughters in SF because his mouth was so sore & tipped me $5k. Seethe, peasants.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

18 days

Clients! How much of your connection with your favorite provider do you think is real intimacy (i.e. stalking, looking up her family and home address, forcing her to date you because you spend 50k on her per year, crossing boundaries)???

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I am LUXURY. $700 is cheap. Rooms at the St. Regis START at $1300. But if you want this client be my guest, I’m sure he would be delighted to pay $200. I’ll text you his number. I don’t want him.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

2 months

Broke up with my ex-whale boyfriend only to get a FMTY request in his dream vacation city from my other whale who didn’t know about my ex-whale. Feels good to be rid of a loser who only paid me $50,000 a month. God really is good!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Wow! Sixth car gifted to me this year. Guess it goes to show how much my patrons love me.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

3 months

When you only wanted luxury trips and Jimmy Choos, but your whale insists on giving you two oil wells and a $15 million company. (Picture as evidence.)

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

2 months

I’ve had multiple clients tell me recently that I’m not charging enough (my minimum is 3k/hr). I’m confused on the economics of this.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Welcome to the High End Hookers Collective where we meet on the weekends and talk shit about anyone who charges less than 1k per hour. Oh and if you’re over a size 2, you’re immediately disqualified from hanging out with us. We’re the elites of the elite.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

A suitor just informed me that he pulled his kids out of their elite private school so he could spend their tuition on me. Don’t accept anything less, ladies.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Today I touched my client’s chest and felt the imprint of a provider friend on him. I asked if he’d worked with her and he said yes, for years. It was so beautiful to feel- I felt tears come to my eyes. Thank you, babes, for all that you do. 🫶🏼

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Not all coochie is equal. Mine is pristine, refined, gleaming. Top shelf coochie. Medium rare coochie. First class coochie. Five star coochie. Blue ribbon coochie. Nobel peace prize coochie.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

6 months

I've been seeing many providers talk about how “slow” it is. I can assure you it's not. Maybe change your business plan and marketing bc baby girl is booked and busy months in advance. Switch it up and take accountability and not blame the market. Just a thought.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

BRB, gonna get married to a wealthy suitor that’s 30 years older than me and sit in his penthouse all day while he ignores me and fucks off to work 14 hours a day to afford my expensive lifestyle while having no friends of my own as he consistently controls my life. 😍

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

This isn’t sex work, it’s ✨ financial dating ✨

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I can barely live on 80k a month.

Adriana Nicole •✨

@adriananic428

1 year

Is $1,000 a week enough for you to live comfortably?

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 month

Survival sex work is no longer a thing... we all have access to the Internet, many advertising sites are free, and aren't we all trying to survive by a job??? This word is overused.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I lost all of these bracelets in the ocean TWICE and this wonderful gentleman bought them all back for me!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

Sometimes I wonder about all those girls who have no review policy… in 4 years being in the industry I haven’t gotten one bad review, and if you keep getting the bad ones and saying that they are fake and you refuse to have reviews… it must have been true what they say idk

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Look what was waiting for me as I came back to our private suite in Bali! 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Currently intubated and in the ICU from multiple bullet wounds. Please send $$$ (for my plastic surgery). Anyone who doesn’t will be blocked immediately.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

December is filling up fast! Reach out while you can!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I’m in sex work to accomplish my goals, like becoming a landlord, so I can collect the majority of my peasants’ income while I’m wined and dined by my number one patron in the Maldives. 🥹

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

Being w/ my patron last night, I realized that I want something real. I’m not like other hookers who do this for transactional reasons. My client treated me w/ Basic Human Decency™ & now I need to find my true love. I can’t do that when I’m blowing geriatric dicks at the Ritz.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

2 months

I met an escort that received a small loan of a million dollars from her client to buy a 10 million dollar property that now she’s wealthy from years later. I’m also a landlord because it was either a choice of sitting on my ass (👍) or a real job (👎). Fix your own sink, poors.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

If you don’t speak French fluently as a high end companion, you might as well quit and be a backwoods bumpkin in peace, somewhere in Alabama making taxidermy possums, using toilet seats as picture frames, and spooning your cousins. Spare us all of your provincial ineptitude. 💅

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Today I: - told another escort she’s trashy for wearing platform Louboutins - bought a new building and will now be a landlord to poors - flew private to Connecticut to attend a Yale fundraising event with a patron Take notes, brokies.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Me, snorting high quality booger sugar from Colombia with my suitor in his penthouse. You, doing crack with Hunter in your cockroach infested apartment. We are not the same.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

3 months

I have too many Birkins. Other gift ideas: 1. The Holy Grail 2. Harry Potter OG Manuscript 3. Wreckage from the Titanic 4. Stolen Artifacts from the Vatican 5. Stele of Hammurabi 6. A Single Unicorn Horn 7. The Sankara Stones 8. John Cage’s 4’33” on Vinyl 9. Spice Melange

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

1 hour bookings are synonymous with “broke” and real escorts don’t do them 🤷🏼‍♀️

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

My FMTY client booked SIX first class flights to ensure there was no way I was going to miss him this weekend!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

6 months

Normally I don’t share my secrets with the poors, but here are my streams of income: 1. Whales 2. The Stock Market 3. Investment Building 1 4. Investment Building 2 5. Investment Building 3 6. Ponzi Scheme 1 7. Ponzi Scheme 2 As you can see, I get by. 💅

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Me and my whale had a fight again today and he’s taking 10k out of my 100k monthly allowance. Idk how I’m going to survive at this point. :(

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

If you’re not here to become a landlord, why are you sex working???

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

10 months

Not to be rude but if you’re only making $10k a month as a sex worker you might not be doing it right and may want to think about investing in another career.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 month

Are you even high end if you do hour appointments? Booking for one hour is like ordering a starter with tap water in a restaurant.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Straight male escorts ARE real escorts. I should know because the one who I’m sleeping with at the moment stays at my place for weeks on end, eats all of my food, and works twice a year.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Finally living out my dream as a sacred goddess prostitute on a remote island where suitors leave on ships for and never come back so they can serve me their entire lives at my temple after they sign over their bank accounts to me. I feel sorry for you poors, I really do.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Drop your rates for 1 hr below so I can rate shame you. 👇🏻

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Won’t anyone care about the old billionaires who get taken advantage of by hot women? 🥺😭

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I’m still offering mentorship! Just $1000 for 120 minutes! Payment plans attract the wrong group of people (poors) so unfortunately I don’t offer them.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Just to piss off the lefty sex workers, I’ve made a donation to the local police department. I’m a hooker, but I stand behind the men & women in blue maintaining law and order and protecting public safety.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

9 months

Went to get the envelope out of the bathroom when I discovered my client had left me a few thousand over. I went to go speak to him about it, then he asked for it BACK. The AUDACITY. Can someone please tell me I’m not an idiot in this situation???

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

Today is my social media planning day! I’ll be writing and mapping out the problematic tweets I’m going to send this week to garner attention and engagement. The way you heauxs are going to be mad. 😋

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I only follow and retweet the same 5 people. They’re my friends in this industry that I go skiing with every year in Aspen, Colorado. We love to compare our new designer bags and laugh about how wealthy our whales are.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Great minds think alike!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

4 months

Lucky girl syndrome: Some random man walked up to me at the bar, dropped $10k in my bag, then walked away.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Business is slow? Just doxx your competition and out them to their families. They have kids? Call CPS. You’ll be taking their clients and making that money in no time! #girlboss #empowered #yasqueen

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Patrons pay for my TIME, not sex. This statement holds up in court, trust me.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

My escort copy is so good, it makes me want to hire myself, treat myself to a 10 course dinner, and have mediocre sex with myself afterwards for a total of 5 minutes. I really know how to pull in the best suitors!!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Ladies!!! Use all of that money you’re spending on utility bills and invest in the stock market!! You might be without electric or water for some time, but you’ll make it back, trust me!!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

WOW! My favorite client just bought me and my assistant an Aston Martin for each of us! We’ll be screening in style while you peasants weep over your empty inbox that’s growing cob webs. 💅

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

If you’re dealing with violent clients, just raise your rates! The higher your rates are, the chances of dealing with these people go down to 0!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I’ve been swept up. I’ve entered a semi-exclusive arrangement with a suitor. I now require a 3 day minimum, which is $40k if any of you are curious.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I just bought my first $50,000 painting. You just paid your rent for a closet in Washington Heights. We are not the same.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Anons are the worst! How dare they expose how sex work can be emotionally and physically taxing! You just need to see better clients and adjust your marketing.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I just lost five of my MacBook Pros by my lake house. Somebody please replace them and send along a tip of $50,000 so I don’t cry myself to sleep tonight.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I love living beyond my means! Taking selfies in my 10k/month grey and white apartment with a bland, five figure furniture set helps with my marketing. I’ll probably never retire at this rate!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Went thru Whale C’s phone this week and found out he’s been splitting my monthly income with some stinky essential oil crystal toting hippie in San Francisco. May have to use my first resort in this case: *clears throat* *faintly whispers* ……. psychological manipulation.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

10 months

Providers who post their political views on social media? Absolute morons. Men with 50k to blow don’t want to hear that you’re an insightful human being or that not everyone thinks like them. It might make them fragile manbabies on the verge of a meltdown. Zip the lip ladies!!!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

10 months

Real high end escorts don’t pay for ads. They get a membership at their local yacht club and meet billionaires for $50k a night. Those bank transfers are TRANSFERRIN. Stay mad, poors. 😘

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

10 months

At one point, being high-end meant something. Knowing how to hold your wine glass. Knowing all of your operas backwards and forwards. Writing a pretentious blog the brokies couldn’t relate to. Now being high-end is just showing a Birkin in a photo & snapping photos of oysters.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

My 50th Chanel purse! Thanks so much R!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

What’s the point of doing SW if you’re not investing all of your money into real estate? It’s like the easiest, smartest way to become a landlord!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I’m happy with going to a hole in the wall just as much as I am with going to a Michelin star restaurant! (Please don’t pick the hole in the wall, actually. I can’t use those ugly dishes for marketing purposes; I’m just trying to seem down to earth and approachable.)

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

9 months

Client-provider relationships are BETTER than normie relationships. For example, I had a whale who fell in love with me and when I cut him off for crossing my boundaries, he stalked me for 1 year straight. Had to get a restraining order and move 3 times. Love that for me!!! 😋🥰

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

All you brokies wish you had clients like mine.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 months

I love chatting with my patrons at our Michelin star dinners. We talk about the most Intellectual and Cultured topics such as funding the NYC ballet, seeing the latest MOMA art exhibit, and complaining about all of the addicts and homeless people on the street who scare us.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

If you don’t charge 1k per hour, you’re not adjusting your rates for inflation. Know your WORTH.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

If you want to aspire to live my life, all you have to do is acquire multiple multi-millionaire boyfriends to buy you homes around the world, virtue signal about how much you give to charity (the environment, never the poors), & make fun of girls charging less than 1200 an hour.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

11 days

What is considered mid-range these days? Enlighten me, an elite courtesan, what you poors are up to.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

£7k for a BBFS overnight??! 🤢 That’s some chump change. I make that in just four hours without offering bare services. Maybe if you worked hard like me, you wouldn’t succumb to such disgusting measures to get rent. 🤣

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I have a Birkin for my wallet, a Birkin for my makeup, a Birkin for my toiletries, a Birkin for my dog, a Birkin for my keys, a Birkin for my shoes, a Birkin for my Pilates gear, a Birkin for my lingerie, a Birkin for luxury salads. The poors could never compete with me.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Exclusive for less than 40k a month? Are you for real? Idc how bad the economy is or even if we’re living during an apocalypse, NEVER undersell your time!!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Looking for a duo partner! Preferably someone I can one-up. 🤗

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I do 60 hours a week of sex work admin in the privacy of my whale’s new 30 million dollar penthouse drinking rare imported wines from Italy. When I say you peasants could never…

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

If you, as a companion, don’t have 20k+ followers, don’t talk to me. Don’t look at me. Don’t even blink in my direction. I don’t entertain or acknowledge despos.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

I post all the books I’m reading because patrons care about my intelligence more than what’s between my legs. Sex is a very small part of the equation because I’m an EXPERIENCE.

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

Took my dad to a strip club for his 60th birthday! He really hit it off with this dancer named Cinnamon. She squirted on him during a lap dance, then did a handstand & proceeded to shake her ass in his face while giving him a BJ at the same time! I love spoiling him!

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

If it’s slow, it’s probably because of you. Have you tried changing your marketing or doing a photoshoot?

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High End Esc*rt

@parody_escort

1 year

For $50,000 I can show you how to never get shadowbanned! #gatekeeping #girlbossing

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