Kat @ollkorrect0 Twitter profile

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

I think my therapist hates me. Wish I had someone to talk to about this.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

My coworker's family just finished the toilet paper they bought in 2020, in case you're wondering who the real villains are

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

I firmly believe the reason this tweet didn't do better is that people don't know what Pangea means

Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

My coworker thought English was spoken in so many countries because of Pangea

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 months

I'm shy. But I will do absolutely filthy things for a man who makes me feel attractive and comfortable.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

10 months

Last night my dad said, "She's really that superstitious?" and I landed a flawless, "She's just a little stitious," and not a single person laughed. This is the true Christmas tragedy.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

My coworker thought English was spoken in so many countries because of Pangea

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

He canceled, so I'm taking myself out. Feeling self-conscious but fuck him. Please don't make me regret this.

Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

Tomorrow I'm seeing a guy I had sex with five years ago. I'm older and fatter now and terrified he'll reject me.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

I bet rebooting feels so good to a computer

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

When we told her the real reason, she immediately realized how silly her thinking was. She said she had a very Catholic upbringing and still struggles to put human history on the right timeline scientifically.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

7 months

Women don't want flowers. We want a Victorian mansion with a wraparound porch and a haunted library with a rolling ladder

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

New Year's Eve 1999. My brother sneaks down to the basement. As the clocks strike midnight, he flips off all the fuses in the house and cackles as everyone loses their minds upstairs.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 months

Why do men always tell me they're allergic to cats? Bitch, so am I. Take a Zyrtec and come meet my cat.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

I'm at a comedy show about to start. It's me, the comedian, the bar owner, and one random couple. This will either be the funniest thing I've ever seen or an absolute train wreck.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 months

My doctor told me "good luck" and gave me finger guns so obviously I'm dying

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

I don't trust trees. They seem shady.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

Tomorrow I'm seeing a guy I had sex with five years ago. I'm older and fatter now and terrified he'll reject me.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

If I'm wrongly accused of a crime, I'm going to prison. I'm way too introverted to have an alibi.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

Guys actually DM total strangers "hey" thinking it's gonna lead to sex

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

It finally happened. I farted off mute in a meeting. Time for a new job.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

@BFSEsq @KatieDeal99 Haha just like that!

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 months

It's not drinking alone if you're on Twitter

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

Married men, I'm gonna need you to go ahead and leave the dating pool

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

@Ris622 Yep, you're reading that right.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

Coyote Ugly but with dogs on the bar and you're allowed to pet them

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

Just spelled "rendezvous" correctly on the first try. Somehow still single.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

So lonely I texted my ex

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

Randomly DMing a woman is a red flag. Therefore, NOT DMing is a green flag. But how will she ever notice your green flags if you don't DM her?

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

5 months

So excited for my coworker to get married this week so I can finally stop hearing every detail of her wedding planning

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

9 months

give me a nerdy, awkward man, and I will be happy forever

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

Alright, I'm hurting. Name some pros of getting dumped.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

He knew me at this weight, for the curious among you

Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

My favorite picture of myself is a douchey mirror selfie

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

@KaufmanAudrey Once, after finishing what I thought was a normal meal, my server brought me a big sticker that said, "I can't believe I ate the whole thing!"

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

I love taking a lil nap on the couch before bed. It's like a sleepy appetizer.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

Is watching porn a hobby? It feels like a hobby.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

99% of you are incredibly kind

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

Hell is meeting the versions of yourself that exist in other people's minds.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

Pangea | Definition, Map, History, & Facts | Britannica

Pangea, supercontinent that incorporated almost all of Earth’s landmasses in early geologic time. Fully assembled by the Early Permian Epoch (some 299 million to about 273 million years ago), it...

www.britannica.com

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

Not to brag, but my computer issues made the IT guy say, "Woah!"

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

Let's see those stickers

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

Might get drunk and start some shit on Goodreads

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

How do serial killers find the time

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

Twitter men are built different

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

I picture all of you as super hot, so it's surprising when you post selfies.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

10 months

I am easily the hottest person in this local indie bookstore

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

16 days

A guy once DMed me on here, and I made the mistake of interacting. When I wasn't "entertaining" enough, he blocked me and tried to publicly shame me by tweeting about how "boring" I was. Anyway, just a reminder that women are real people who don't owe you anything.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

I'm afraid to buy a new can opener and find out the problem is me.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

The original post had 170 likes when I QTed it...

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

My favorite picture of myself is a douchey mirror selfie

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

Honestly I would be so relieved if a guy on a dating app told me he follows me on Twitter. It would eliminate so much pressure to try to act normal.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

Thank you all for the ridiculously kind words. Update: I sent him a nude last night and he almost immediately started setting up to bail. This morning he said he has a headache and may want to reschedule. Telling myself correlation is not causation but the timing is damning.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

10 months

I've had a bottle of champagne in my fridge for three years and all I want in 2024 is someone to drink it with.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

7 months

I'm lonely but not make-small-talk-with-the-cashier lonely

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

I'm old enough that being single is a red flag.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

No, Google Photos, I would not like to order a print of my nude

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

I'm sorta pretty as long as you don't compare me to a single other person.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

I sexually identify as disappointing.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 months

Please don't forget me. I'm still this messy bitch.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

The comedians outnumbered the audience members. It was terrible -- fucking god-awful -- but we met cute guys.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 months

hahaha I'm gonna be alone forever. I rejected a nice, educated, successful man simply because he sucks.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

Hey sorry I was weird before, it was just because of who I am as a person

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 days

sent a guy a dirty pic. his responses, in order: "ha," "oh no," "thanks"

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 months

Friday night

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

I just broke up with a guy and he told me to leave his things with the doorman

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

6 months

Show me the derpiest pics of your pets

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

Swallow my pride? I dunno, that's like six lions

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

in the mood to share bad selfies and drink terrible alcohol out of a vintage playboy glass

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

I like to pretend anyone younger than me doesn't exist.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

When I die, please don't give condolences to my family. Give them to me. I'm the one who died.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

5 months

[losing my mind] good and you?

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

Everyone's talking about "boy math" and "girl math" and I don't think people know what "math" is

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

A guy once called my boobs "not gross" so get in line, boys.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

9 months

[on my deathbed] This is nice. Being in bed is nice.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

that awkward moment between childhood and retirement

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

Working from home is great because I also get to cry from home.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

Changed my body from the way God made it. It reflects my altered mind.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

Real talk 1. Not doing amazing lately 2. Twitter is getting to be a pretty lonely place for me

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

10 months

Thinking about that time I accidentally took a married couple to see a live polka band before our threesome

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

Sorry, I can't be friends with anyone whose life isn't in shambles.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

I was trying to take a cute pic but when I got close she started purring and I melted

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

4 years

Gonna start saying "hey stranger" to complete strangers.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

Just woke up from our catnap together

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

8 months

I'm becoming increasingly convinced that the bigger your social media account, the worse it is for your mental health

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 months

being a weirdo, but quietly

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

I was a different person when I wrote that to-do list.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

My phone made an album of me looking like this

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

10 months

I'm doing a juice cleanse and all I can think is this would be a great time for anal

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

7 months

They should invent a cop who actually protects people

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

Why are men always looking for women with a "positive outlook"? What is a "positive outlook"?

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

9 months

just because

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

Jeopardy is only fun if someone's around to see how smart you are.

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

2 years

hey sorry I made things awkward the whole time you've known me

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

11 months

QT with the oldest selfie on your phone

JP 🍍

@JPLFR80

11 months

Qt with the oldest selfie on your phone The kid and I, around 2005. With my original ears

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

1 year

technically you can only laugh your ass off once

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Kat

@ollkorrect0

3 years

Real friends don't make you hang out.

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