buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma. @notbuhlengoma Twitter profile | Pikagi

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buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

@notbuhlengoma

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96

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Joined August 2020

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

i hope that one day someone chooses you. i hope that one day someone loves you enough to want to keep you. i hope that one day you feel less alone. i hope that one day you will have someone you can lean on without fear. i hope you find someone.. someone good, someone kind.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

there’s so much pain and pressure being the first born child. particularly the first born girl.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

as a person, you must learn the subtle art of ukuphuma emntwini.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

i hope you find a love that chooses you. a love that doesn’t keep you up at night wondering if you’re good enough. i hope you find a soft love. a love that takes care of your body and your soul. i hope that love comes soon. i hope you let that kind of love in.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

one thing about me

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that understands that i am fragile but also strong. so that the love is soft and does not cause me pain just because i’m strong enough to take it.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

depression is so inconvenient. the fact that you are at a standstill while everything around you is moving so fast. your duty to eat, to bathe, to make money and to just breathe. all these things are looking at you and you can’t move. the only peaceful task is sleeping.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

10 months

i hate it when someone presents themselves as someone good with good intentions, then they break your heart. you were fine in your corner and then they came and disturbed your peace.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

why am i sulking?💀

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i don’t respond well to silent treatment. no one is saying you can’t be angry at me. no one is saying you can’t take some time to process. “hey, i’m upset about something. when i have the language and strength to communicate, i will.”

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

the nurse putting the injection in: “it’s in” michael: “that’s what she said”

@Tumi213

Tumi

3 years

Imagine an episode of The Office where they all have to get vaccinated

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i hope that i never have to feel like i’m forcing someone to stay with me ever again.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i don’t believe that true healing is being able to wish someone who hurt you well. i can wish nothing. i can be indifferent to your entire existence. i don’t even have to like you. healing and reconciliation can exist separately. the one doesn’t justify the other.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i think i need to remind myself that i’m allowed to love people but i shouldn’t make them my everything. only i can be my everything.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

he said i’m the best, he ain't never lied.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

grief is killing me but i’m alive i guess.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

#NewProfilePic

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i need to learn how to love people without making them my everything. only i can be my everything.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i have always belonged only to myself. @BlckPorcelain

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

there’s literally nothing you can be or do for someone to want you, even as a friend. you can be the most beautiful, the kindest, the best everything. you can be everyones dream but not their dream. so stop trying. be yourself and let whoever sees your worth see it.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

11 months

you deserve a love that gives more than it takes. you deserve a love that doesn’t deplete you.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

people aren’t yours to keep. let them leave. there’s nothing you can do to make them stay. they aren’t yours.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

@westerosies this and “tell cersei, i want her to know that it was me”

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love of grand gestures, cute gifts and words of affirmation.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

it’s important to understand that you cannot love someone into loving you. you can show them how much you care about them, check up on them, send them gifts and support them. you can be everything and they still won’t love you because they just don’t want you.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

you will find your people. i know you get lonely and sometimes you need someone who worries about you and your wellbeing. you deserve good people and good people are what you’re going to get.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

life is incredibly painful and there is no reason that i can accept. the amount of pain we’re experiencing is irrational.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

got 88% for admin law😭

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i don’t want a love that makes me anxious. i don’t want a love that triggers me. i don’t want a love that isn’t attached with respect, softness and commitment.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

love arrives exactly when loves supposed to and love leaves exactly when love must.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i wonder who taught us that we need to act like everything is okay when we are hurting. you’re hurting and it’s okay. feel it through, you don’t owe anyone a brave face.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that allows me to be comfortable in love. not one that thrives at making me anxious.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

maybe we’re just not for some people, despite the fact that we love them and maybe they love us.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

being the woman who looks at your persons other women and comparing yourself to them. concluding that you’re nothing like them. not as beautiful, not as put together. this is not something anyone deserves. this isn’t it. it’s hard to recover from this.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that stays.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

you might have stumbled and made mistakes but get up. the floor isn’t a place for someone like you.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

your heart is tired from all the love you give but never receive.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i had to unlearn a lot of acts of self hate. i admit that i am a slow learner but i have grown so much and i am proud of every little move i make towards healing.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

choosing the finest.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that comes with respect.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i don’t know who needs to hear this but stop telling everyone your plans. you have enemies dressed as allies. keep your circle as tight as possible.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve love that comes with peace not chaos.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

don’t plant seeds of commitment in my mind if you never intended to water them.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i want a love that wants to know that i’m okay.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

she’s quick to say no coz she know she’s a diamond.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that doesn’t keep me up at night.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

we cannot be begging for love.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

🙃

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

10 months

the worst thing is losing trust in yourself because you will constantly second guess your decisions and more importantly, your intuition. you will end up ignoring your intuition, putting yourself in danger.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

8 months

grief will creep up on you in the happiest places. it’s supposed to be a celebration and you’re crying over a loved one who passed away 2 years ago. sometimes there’s no apparent trigger. you just miss your loved one in the middle of the club dancing to amapiano.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

i wish i had the luxury to unravel; to fall apart. i wish i had the luxury to take some time off to grieve, to cry, to feel sorry for myself. this way of living takes a toll on you- you suffer losses and your world shatters but the real world continues and you must partake.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

i need igbo and shayo.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

still healing. still hurting.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

not allowing yourself to break down and be sad is an act of self harm. you’re accumulating grief that needs to be released because you believe that you need to be strong.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

you deserve a good love. a kind love. a shoulder to cry on. someone who spoils you. someone who makes you feel safe. someone who reminds you of your beauty. you deserve the good kind of love.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

8 months

you deserve a love that does not come with conditions. you deserve love that doesn’t ask for anything in return. you deserve a love that gives more than it takes. you deserve a love that protects your vulnerable self and appreciates your strength.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

being the ✨support system ✨friend is crazy because you’re being used for your softness and compassion. they know that you’ll always let them vent, comfort them and advice them, but you’re not important to them. you are only their friend when they need comfort and kind words.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

when my heart is overwhelmed. lead me to the rock that is higher than i. -psalm 61:2

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

you do not owe anyone a thick afro. you do not owe anyone an hourglass figure. you do not owe anyone perfect mental health. you do not owe anyone an explanation. you do not owe anyone heterosexuality. you don’t owe anyone anything. You only owe yourself softness & kindness.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

you need to be stronger than you’ve ever been before. life isn’t getting any easier, you must be stronger or you will drown. people like you don’t have the luxury to give up. we need you. we need your mind. we need your ideas. you need to fight.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that worries about me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i don’t need to be validated in my taste. i like a song, you don’t. i like avocados, you don’t. i like the outfit, you don’t. fine, bru. i’m not going to convince you. like what you like.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that loves me in public and doesn’t hide me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

i can assure you. in fact, i promise you. he won’t call you, he won’t text you and he won’t apologise. he doesn’t care.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that is conducive for my healing space.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i’m in that stage of depression where mundane tasks are hard to do. i just sit for hours needing to pee but lacking the strength to go pee. showering literally makes me want to cry because it’s just so much and i cannot eat. literally everything is hard right now.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

for each like, i’ll take a shot. like this tweet if you care about me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

if i’ve made it this far, i can make it all the way.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that doesn’t make my heart sting when i see them being good to others but horrible to me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

10 months

you don’t miss him, you’re lonely.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i’m dead! please look at what this filter did to my brows. 💀

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

a scorpio, a big deal. a leo, a lion.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that isn’t mean spirited.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

it’s so hard being depressed and having to act like you’re not.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that doesn’t ignore me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

comment a heart emoji if you’re feeling down. i will give you some words of affirmation.💗

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

10 months

i just want to be free and healed from my trauma.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

10 months

i just want someone to cuddle me and treat me right.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

i deserve a love that isn’t violent or volatile.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

you won’t get an apology. you have to move on without it.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i need to unlearn playing devils advocate because in some way, i’m gaslighting myself. i can never just feel what i feel without trying to understand and justify the other person’s actions. here i am considering them and no one is considering me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

you’re scared that this is all you will be. you will be more. you will do better. you will succeed.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

if i give a man the power to feed me, i am ultimately giving him the power to starve me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

watching your dad father people and treat people well while he couldn’t care less about you.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

sadly, you don’t get a break from yourself. you can’t block, breakup or leave yourself. you can dull your pain for a while, maybe with alcohol or avoidance but grief will wait for you, guilt will wait for you. so instead of running away, work on forgiving yourself and healing.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

you need to be okay with the fact that you are not certain people’s everything, you are not their world, even if they are yours.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

8 months

ubuhle bama Hlubi fr🛖

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

please like this tweet if you’re from eastrand. especially people near tsakane and kwa thema area. please like even if it’s not those two areas. just like if you’re in eastrand johannesburg. i’ll dm you.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

cannot believe i did 63 readings today while grieving 2 of my family members who died 9 days apart. may not be enough but wow. i cannot believe how strong i have come to be.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i always try to be a good friend. being a good friend is important to me.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

1 year

the bible says that eve’s sin was punished by pain in child birth, but the older i get and the more i see, it has become clear to me that eve’s punishment wasn’t the pain, her punishment was adam himself.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

before anything and anymore, i have an obligation to myself to protect and love myself. if anything or anyone puts me in a situation where i have to deviate from this obligation, they do not belong in my life.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

2 years

he like it this with a bounce.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i need to constantly remind myself that my failures during the times where i was depressed, ill, grieving or where my mental health was shaky aren’t my fault. i did what i could and it wasn’t enough but it was not my fault.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

we will push through though. we will make it, the same we made it last time and the time before that.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

i had to bargain with myself. that i would allow myself to love you for as long as i need to but i must unlearn needing you, depending on you and wanting you to be present.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

3 years

no ways, at the very least, if birth control doesn’t work and i fall pregnant, can i be alerted early enough to go to stopes. it’s kinda rude to just randomly be 6 months pregnant.

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@notbuhlengoma

buhlebamahlubi “buhle” ngoma.

4 years

protect your peace and your heart at any cost necessary.

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