AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch @mathwits Twitter profile

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 months

About this list, if you want to read up on the various bills, here are the links [THREAD]:

🇵🇸❄New Singapore Opposition Party❄🇰🇪

@WJWahiga

3 months

The Finance Bill isn't a win yet. There are also others: Agriculture & Livestock Bill AI & Robotics Bill Appropriations Bill Conflict of Interest Bill IEBC Bill ICT Authority Bill Land Act Amendment Bill Protest Bill Prison Reforms Bill Public Participation Bill #RutoMustGo

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 months

This is an Alice Ng'ang'a hate account!! #RutoMustGo

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

11 months

Got an internship that pays in USD, two months after graduating from uni

Kuwams🍉

@kuwamocho_

11 months

Your biggest achievement this year?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Chasing the bag but ni kama bag pia ni Mkale😭😭

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

"Umesomea exam??" "Zii wallahi hata mimi sijasoma😭"

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 months

Guys, najua tumejam but msisahau hashtag kwa all your tweets #RutoMustGo

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

@Juli_nPls Me when I saw the bag of chips:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

What if Rao's purpose in life was to show us not all dreams are valid?😭😭

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 months

The bodies in the sacks were tied using rope lakini wameweka hapo cellotape. Jeez, hata drama fest had better plays😭😭😭 #RutoMustGo

Capital FM Kenya

@CapitalFMKenya

3 months

Evidence recovered from the serial killer prime suspect in the Mukuru quarry murders

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

Sawa nilisema manifesting but nilikuwa najua naenda

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

9 months

"Niekee Ombachi"😭

dennis ombachi OLY

@ombachi13

9 months

Yo! I make other delicious meals you just cant make me the face of Ugali mayai 😭😭😭

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

RIP Owang' Sino, you would have loved fish fillet😔

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 months

Ukianza kuingia CBD there's usually this tension that builds up inside you until upatane na fearless people kwa ground, unasahau kwa nini hata ulikuwa unaogopa #NaneNaneMarch

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

My mum wallahi Being a Luhya wasn't enough, she had to go and be a Kiswahili teacher😭😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Bash kwa kina Joan ni top tier. Watu wa gengetone one living room, trap another, wa shash pale kwa gazebo, men kwa laundry room, wa hot girl summer kwa pool😭😭. Munchies house managers will sort you out. Then drinks zinacome tu from the cellar 😔

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Labda shash😂

Owichezzz

@PiocheBrio

5 years

Juja kuna kanisa?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

11 months

Dropping spoons in class at lunchtime since the teacher pretended not to hear the bell😂>>

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

Honestly, The River and The Source is such a beautifully written book💯

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Being single is definitely okay, ni sawa yaani. But not having anyone to fuck? That shit is messed up and it's not for me😭😭😭

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Hizi zinakaa kusema "We only do lemon grass with a touch of morning dew"😭😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Niko convinced the guys who say "Mtaachana tu" are the same ones who used to say "Ati umesema uko Kadi" tukicheza poker😂🚮

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Just a reminder that I'll write your C, C++, Java, JavaScript, Python programs and assignments for you at an affordable price Please rt, my people might be on your tl❤️

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Kumbe this wasn't a hotel 😭😭😭

Joankubai❤

@Joankubai2

4 years

Meet my baby,Amani🐶💙

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

@prof_pius Me stopping him mid strokes like:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

"Basi mkipata hiyo 1M mnaweza kunisukumia thao juu hamngekuwa hapa bila mimi?"

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Fun fact😂 Time in Kiswahili is measured from sunrise to sunset, then from sunset to sunrise So saa nane is basically 8 hours from sunrise😂😂

McLovin

@3malinh0

5 years

People who read time in Kiswahili are a different breed of people. How is 2 o’clock saa nane

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

"You don't text me anymore" "Si you also have a phone?"

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 months

Amkeni buana. Please don't forget that tusipoendelea kufinya inamaanisha our comrades died in vain😩 #RutoMustGo

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

Ati Tems iko wapi?😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

Luhyas seeing people in the gym training their calves:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Me: Hello sem- 'You have received a reverse call request..."

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Can we talk about how Highschool teachers weren't punishing us to teach us better but just to show us that they have power over us by humiliating us?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

You mean kuna time nilikuwa nauliza "What are you doing?" naambiwa "Thinking about you" Then nafurahi for 2 weeks?😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Me in form 1: I woke up at the crack of dawn and dashed to the frog's Kingdom, taking a shower that left me as fresh as a daisy and as cool as a cucum... My teacher of English:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

"Kuna msee anacome, dim kwanza"😂

ishâq🇩🇿

@ishaqBarlou

5 years

Bomboclaat

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

"ntsntsnts" vs "Come here Amani"

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Someone: Class imebounce tushike 'kaquorra'? Rest of us:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 months

"Tano Nane" "Nane Nane" 🫱🏾‍🫲🏿 Kwani ni kesho #NaneNaneMarch

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Listening to DJ Evolve saying "..not really because these were my tools of trade, so when I don't have them I'm not able to work..." while talking about his hands😩

videos you have to watch

@mustseenvideos

4 years

Bomboclaat

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

😂😂😂💉

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

You just had to be there😫

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Mshaanza kujog? Si I thought tunaanza Monday?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Lakini being in Strath is a struggle Sasa class imebounce lakini I still have to wear official clothes nikienda out ndio mama yangu asiniulize Naenda wapi Nairobi!!!!! Nairobi!! 😣😣🤚😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Sahi wameandika hapo kwa corner ya blackboard "11 days to go"😭😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Me: Niaje Classmate: Nishasign Me:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Sauti stole

TerriAnn Kibiriti

@terrikibiriti

4 years

Name the band

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

Remember, the goal today is to not get arrested. Juu ni mpaka Tuesday 😭😭

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

During preps when you see the teacher on duty at the window** Me pretending the deskmate I was laughing with ananisumbua:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

I keep wondering what growing up in a home like this would feel like

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Kukuwa masikini huku mtu hutreatiwa aje?😔

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

That Runtown, Eazi, Maleek Berry era>>>>

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

Wanatutishia na job cuts like guys even have jobs

BusinessDaily

@BD_Africa

3 years

IMF warns protesting Kenyans face job cuts, taxes without loan

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Goes to Instagram and sees people vacationing abroad** Me:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Si mrudishe tu Tusker Project Fame😣😭

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

BREAKING NEWS: The number of girls with tongue piercings declines rapidly after one Mercy Mutai from Moi, alias Mamacita, expresses high disgust in them. More news within the hour.

Mamacita

@Mercymutai_

5 years

Girls with pirced tongues disgust me.

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

Oh she the Head Honcho😒😂

Miss Sarah Bellum 🧠

@BananasSmoking

3 years

Y’all be gagging on 6 inches...if you don’t get the fuck out!

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 years

Why am I more afraid of disappointing my parents than I am of disappointing myself?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Nikikuwa incognito na wanaact sana before waanze:

Amdas Blackman🇺🇬

@amakomasoud

5 years

Bomboclaat

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

"Enda ushikilie meza tunacome na mzinga"

ᖇᗩZᗩ

@razonater

4 years

Bomboclaat

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

If you fail KCSE you won't be successful in life

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

What makes you think we take advice from murderers?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 months

Monitoring: #NaneNaneMarch

IPOA

@IPOA_KE

2 months

IPOA is monitoring police conduct in today's protests. #GuardingPublicInterestInPolicing #PoliceAccountability ^SC

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Fr you don't put tissue inside the toilet before pooping ndio the water doesn't splash?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

@Cynaammon @chuuzus "Cindy, this bitch is messing up my floor" always gets me😂😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

We're not outraged enough by the ongoing corruption for me.

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

When the doctor asks if I'm sexually active and I hesitate My mum:

SUMEYA MEDIA AND EVENTS PR

@SumeyaeventsPR

5 years

Caption this

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Woman down😔😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

6 years

Blunt hits back: Sex inaitwa Mechi juu condom kwa Kiswahili ni mpira ama juu mimba ni ball?🤔😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

This could be us lakini kuku yangu haiendi na hawk mimi

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Not-

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

How to eat matumbo:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

In 3 lines

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Yaani even after Jimwat said: Hata akuwe msawa aje Hata akuwe anagawa aje Under 18 kizee tafash jo, tafash Hamkusikia?😂😂😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Siku hizi going through my clothes before nioshe ni depressing😭 instead of kupata Soo kwa mfuko napata tu masks 😔

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Me realizing I ACTUALLY need to remember the things I'm learning in uni to use in my career:

CAPTAIN👨🏾‍✈️🍾

@arno_diii

4 years

BOMBOCLAAT!!!!!!!!

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

Everyone: Fancy Fingers: Okay sawa naweza kuimba

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Niggas too idle😭😂😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

🌞

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

Even if you won't speak about the case, just push the hashtag: #JusticeForKianjokomaBrothers

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Kuwasha na gas then running out of the kitchen ndio isinuke kwa nyumba >>> 😂😂😂😂

Stiorra

@_njauu

5 years

Kuwasha kindukulu na candle>>>>>

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

My brother has introduced 4 girls to us na he's still going.

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

Lessgoooo 😤

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

2 months

Praying we gain momentum kama ya that week of 25th tena #RutoMustGo

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 months

Na si ati you take 300 years to produce those autopsy reports. Treat this matter as URGENT. We want those results immediately!! #RutoMustGo

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

Me henceforth when my friends call me to go swimming:

Onchari

@Oncharionchari

3 years

Her dressing code disqualified her. She was half naked, everything was out. I tried to convince him but he was firm with his decision. So I called my bestie explained to her. May this information be helpful Lesson learned

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Naona pia watu wa iPhone wakilia😂😂😂 si I thought hiyo ndio inakuwanga measure of wealth ama?

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

3 years

"Can't wait to join uni, ukimalizana na one unit ni hivyo" Units being building blocks of each other😩:

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Kama I've always wanted you, hata uingie na fullstop I will continue that conversation with '...'😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

😚

Debbie with the good hair💗

@barbbiaa

4 years

Here it goes, quote with your resting bitch face 😍😜

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

Kuna rhumba ya Lang'ata, maji nayo ni story, Ukitaka kuoga, labda ununue ya Lorry, eh yeah😭

Droid

@droid254

4 years

Kuna Rhumba Roysambu iyo ni ya Wanaija... Kuna Rhumba Rongai utahitaji passport... Kuna Rhumba ya Ruaka utasikiza kwa giza CONTINUE....

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

5 years

Jana when I got home nilipitia kwa duka kwanza and since the mama is my mum's friend ilibidi nimaintain. The mission failed when I asked her credit ya 50 inakuwanga how much and she looked even more confused after she noticed I was being serious 😂😂

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AliceNgangaYouRaggedyAssBitch

@mathwits

4 years

No one: Artcaffe: