Mark R. Yzaguirre Profile Banner
Mark R. Yzaguirre Profile
Mark R. Yzaguirre

@markyzaguirre

5,974
Followers
3,036
Following
3,280
Media
58,420
Statuses

I’m a lawyer, but I’m not your lawyer. Opinions stated here are mine alone. Theorist of the Normie Restoration. And there should be a Texas flag emoji.

Houston, Texas
Joined December 2013
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
@DailyCaller WATCH: The Daily Caller has nothing better to do than hassle a college student
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@Cobratate Yes. I understand that you are in jail.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
3 years
I guess it’s politically incorrect to refer to JD Vance as a Yale-educated venture capitalist now?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@costareports Congressional Democrats: you have one job today. Do it. No one cares if you’re bored.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@kenolin1 @CheriJacobus @RepThomasMassie Perhaps Rep. Massie, who makes much of his status as an MIT alum, should ask MIT whether political science is a legitimate (non-science) academic discipline.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@td2411 @madison_tayt If the bill is $700, then you have every right to complain about a $70 tip if you’re an American waiter. And one should learn the tipping customs of places one is visiting.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@mtgreenee You heckled the President at the State of the Union, and confronted a teenage mass shooting survivor when he was visiting the Capitol. If this uncivil incident happened, you only have yourself to blame.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@RepSwalwell So Silicon Valley startups should get after-the-fact depository insurance that other Americans don’t have? No way.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
Elon losing Catturd2 is like when Walter Cronkite said the Vietman War was unwinnable.
@steinkobbe
Wild Geerters
2 years
lol this is exactly what you deserve if you pay for twitter blue
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@Fintweet11 @iamharaldur Frankly, stiffing the waitstaff isn’t a blow against the system.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
@matthewjdowd @SenBobCorker Corker should primary Trump. He's retiring from the Senate in 2018, so why not? He'll have time on his hands.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@SashaPezenik Good. But next question - how did this now-debunked allegation, from the niece of a failed GOP Senate candidate, get to ABC News and who was pushing this story?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
Said before & will say again. Purpose of carrying guns openly at protests is attempted intimidation. No other legitimate reason.
@letsgomathias
Christopher Mathias
7 years
A lot of dudes with big guns here at Lee Park in #Charlottesville
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 months
@EndWokeness A tiny, mostly unnoticeable change in prices for customers, but a big benefit for workers?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
@DonaldJTrumpJr I'm sorry you aren't the President's favorite child, Don.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
3 years
@JDiamond1 Joe Biden appropriating and brushing off an intended insult that was issued by someone Biden just wished a Merry Christmas to was the proper thing to do, and says a lot about Biden and the guy who was trying to be clever.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 years
WILL YOU BE MY SON, ONE OF THE OTHER ONES MAY BE IN TROUBLE
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@Santos4Congress Will you start telling people you are a sea captain now?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@josh_hammer Ownum Selfum
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@RealCandaceO @kathleen_belew According to the University of Chicago’s website, Kathleen Belew is a professor there. Calling simple facts “made-up” or “fake news” because they don’t align with your ideology isn’t convincing. And neither are self-declared victories.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 years
@charliekirk11 @taylorswift13 “Your career has never recovered since Kanye ended it.” Millions of record sales and a whole bunch of sellout concerts say otherwise. But don’t let anyone keep you from whining.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@hughhewitt If this was 1861, Hugh Hewitt would be chastising Lincoln for not being willing to work with Jefferson Davis.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@TheRickWilson I bet Donald Trump Jr. wishes his name was Hunter Biden because that would mean he had a dad who cared about him.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@Lancegooden You mean Air Force One isn’t subject to the same scheduling hassles as Southwest Airlines? Stop the presses!
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
3 years
@mattgaetz Why didn’t you say that when General Milley was in the room? Actually, we know why.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@JudiciaryGOP Look what’s sitting next to the Time Magazine covers, champ.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@EndWokeness China’s military looks like the sort of standard-issue goose-steppers that the US has a history of defeating.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@BillAckman @SVB_Financial Shouldn’t the venture capital boys be responsible for the cost and risks of their…ventures?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@baseballcrank Free lunches for minors isn’t perpetual childhood. It’s simply making sure kids get fed adequately for at least one meal a day.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@ourobororoboruo As a Mexican-American, I can tell you your pico de gallo has way too much onion in it. But I won’t mock or discourage you for trying to make it because I’m not like you.
@ourobororoboruo
Frankie Huang 黄碧赤
3 years
Made pico de gallo while pork cooks in the oven 😌 Trying not to snack on this too much but it’s so good
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@autovate @iamharaldur That’s nice but also irrelevant when the topic is payment practices in the United States.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
@AllForTheSpurs @DonaldJTrumpJr The Grammar Police caught me and I thanked them and fixed my comment. Blessings to all.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@justinboldaji Yeah, but speaking personally, if I saw that someone’s religion gave them the power to choke someone with psychic powers, I’d respect that religion and maybe want to study it more.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@TheBabylonBee Another reminder that the Babylon Bee is staffed by people who couldn’t get an internship at The Onion
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
Not sure why the Democratic Party should be taking planning suggestions from someone who hates the Party and won’t vote for Joe Biden in any circumstance, but hey, it gave Liz Bruenig something to write about.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
3 years
@amconmag “Mussolini’s mistress was a Sephardic Jew.” Well, this takes “some of my best friends are…” to a new level.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@stoolpresidente Dave, I’m not sure you should believe that guy.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@labourball @madison_tayt “Just move to another country” is a ridiculous response here, and even if it was a viable option for most workers, one needs money in the meantime. And in the US, tips for waitstaff aren’t customer charity, they are part of the business.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@tedcruz Mocking Americans who lost their jobs is classless, Senator.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@DavidSacks So Silicon Valley startups should get additional, after-the-fact depository insurance that other Americans don’t have? The FDIC isn’t there to cover deposits on an unlimited basis.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
19 days
@AidanSimardone Popular fronts against awful political movements need to be wide and popular. Did they not teach you that at clown college?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
So Trump is now sending his social media mob after an individual journalist, @daveweigel . Note that @davidfrum warned that this sort of thing would happen.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@hughhewitt @realDonaldTrump @washingtonpost Hugh, you could have said this in five words: I am a Trump sycophant.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
3 years
If every state is a border state, then the intrusive law enforcement tactics used on the border (no need for a warrant to search your car at a border checkpoint, for example) can become justified everywhere. Hard to avoid suspecting that is the endgame here.
@therecount
The Recount
3 years
Sen. Joni Ernst (R-IA): “The reality is that every state is now a border state.”
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
I don’t think this is a good sign for Matt Gaetz.
@Acyn
Acyn
4 years
Tucker: That was one of the weirdest interviews I’ve ever conducted
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@SteveKingIA @KamalaHarris Good work showing everyone your lack of knowledge about the history of slavery in the United States, you bigoted has-been.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
I remember seeing Roy Clark playing a guitar solo on a show like Austin City Limits when I was a kid. I only knew him from Hee Haw and was stunned. He was an Eddie Van Halen / Jimmy Page level guitarist. Seriously underrated.
@RexChapman
Rex Chapman🏇🏼
4 years
1975: That time Roy Clark played “Malagueña” on 'The Odd Couple'...
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@edwardrussl Oh, look everyone, a self-styled free thinker.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 years
This interview was surgery performed in front of a live TV audience.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@stkirsch Once again, why would anyone believe some rando sitting next to them would have the money to cover that offer? Unless you have a briefcase of cash ready to show the people you’re making the offer to, they have every reason to dismiss you. And I don’t wear masks myself anymore.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@pkcapitol @emilyaheil That is bizarre and you should try to be more normal with your dinner crew.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@DineshDSouza Well, you certainly can identify as an intellectually dishonest felon.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@bgmasters Tell us all about how to win Senatorial campaigns, Blake.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@CatholicLeague No one should seek your legal advice.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
8 years
@MerriamWebster @gabrielroth This needs to go in the dictionary as an example of ownership.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
@Evan_McMullin I used to be a Republican & saw how good, decent conservatives acted like if they ignored the bigots, they'd go away. That didn't happen.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
If DC was a state, it would have been able to call out its own National Guard. Today is an argument for DC statehood.
@byaaroncdavis
Aaron C. Davis
4 years
BREAKING: A source tells me The Defense Department has just denied a request by DC officials to deploy the National Guard to the US Capitol.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@RadioFreeTom @tedcruz Not to mention the fact that “read my book to find out” isn’t a good response from a US Senator who put the image of a Soviet militaristic statue on his book that is supposedly about justice
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@benshapiro You start with a bad premise but in any case, the GOP nominated and stuck with Donald Trump. If he loses, the failure is on them as well, not Trump alone. Don’t try to create a distance where none exists.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@esthercrawford So basically what you’re saying is:
@dril
"Wabe"
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"im not owned! im not owned!!", i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a corn cob
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
3 years
@AndrewYang Why I’m having a tantrum after losing two primaries, by Andrew Yang
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@DanCrenshawTX You’re saying Texas Republicans (who have run the state for decades) took their cues from California? That is hard to believe.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@RealCandaceO Just leaving this here, in case you’ve blocked @KevinMKruse .
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@john_sipher @RexChapman Jenny Cudd was a mayoral candidate from Midland? It’s like Friday Night Lights for fascists.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
*Assistant Principal voice* Unfortunately for you, this is going on your permanent record.
@thehill
The Hill
5 years
JUST IN: Trump told Republicans he doesn't want impeachment on his "resume": report
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@kenklippenstein @travis_view A live shot of Trump Tower, as Trump begins to take notice of Ron DeSantis.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@td2411 @madison_tayt Oh and one more: “I don’t like American payment customs, so I’ll stiff the waiter to prove a point.” Clownish.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@td2411 @madison_tayt Amazing how many replies to this tweet are simply some version of “I’m obstinate, cheap, and refuse to acknowledge actually-existing American customs.” And note that the OP’s manager told the visitors of the 20% custom, and they ignored it anyway!
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@jmrphy What the Dickens are you talking about?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
“the board accused O’Keefe of spending “$14,000 on a charter flight to meet someone to fix his boat under the guise of meeting with a donor,” blowing over $150,000 on high-end limo services, and taking thousands of dollars more for personal DJ equipment.”
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@BCAppelbaum LSU’s team is playing 90 minutes down the highway in New Orleans for the #NationalChampionship . This is a once in a lifetime moment for the students and canceling classes for two days so they can savor it is perfectly fine.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
3 years
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@cafreiman Wealth and status are relational goods tied to time and place. Telling me that I have a better and more varied diet than Julius Caesar doesn’t make me wealthier or more powerful than Caesar was in his day.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@RealSaavedra So were the people who booed Trump at the Nats game and UFC fight. It’s a big country, and claiming that one set of Americans is the Real America while another isn’t is...un-American.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@BasedMikeLee @TheRealBeliveau Being taken on expensive trips by billionaires makes someone a hero?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@Acosta “That’s right. I ordered the hit on that balloon.”
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@marceloclaure It bothers me when I hear people tell young people that they should waste their youth. And there’s a big difference between encouraging good hard work where one can live well vs. encouraging bad hard work where one lives to work.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@basedfloridians @DavidSacks Bossing around Apple? More like, continuing to pay the 30% fee to Apple after Tim Cook gave him a free tour of the premises.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
@Casey Did you serve in Afghanistan or Iraq? You’re the right age to have been able to do so. If not, why are you fantasizing about fighting in wars in the past when you didn’t sign up to fight them in your era?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@charliekirk11 You were saying?
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 years
@baseballcrank @KatzOnEarth This isn’t a very good evasion, Dan.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 years
@SanofiUS Cancelled by ABC and owned by Ambien. Tough week for Roseanne Barr.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@av_cova @tedcruz Because he was frightened and trying to keep things from escalating. The video speaks for itself and your “just asking questions” schtick is weak.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
“If a president can pardon himself as well as his or her subordinates, a president can order any crime, or commit it himself, with absolute impunity...And given the Raffensperger recording, who doubts that Trump will try it?” @davidfrum states the stakes.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@Nigel_Farage Hey Nigel, the plan is to take down the balloon when it’s over water, so debris doesn’t land on Americans who are on the ground. Go back to the pub with your little rants.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@JennaEllisEsq Opposed the Regime? He was the Prime Minister of Japan and his party has run Japan for most of the time since World War Two.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@MedvedevRussiaE @trussliz See, in a free society, people like Liz Truss resign or get fired when they lose political favor, rather than mysteriously fall out of windows. You have no business mocking or gloating here.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@AnthonySabatini Admiring a fascist dictator offends God and History.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
Mexico should deny Jenny Cudd’s entrance into Mexico at the airport as an undesirable foreign insurrectionist.
@RawStory
Raw Story
4 years
Trump-appointed judge lets Capitol insurrectionist leave the country for vacation in Mexico: report
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
2 years
@JDVance1 You worked for a venture capital firm until you decided to run for public office. Maybe women can make their own choices regarding what they want to do with their lives also.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 years
Roseanne says she is going to be on the Joe Rogan show. So all the Intellectual Dark Web jokes people were making on Twitter today (like @chrislhayes below) came true within hours.
@chrislhayes
Chris Hayes
6 years
Now, she can join the Intellectual Dark Web full time!
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
5 years
@LarryOConnor “You were AWFUL to us.”
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
6 years
No attorney-client privilege for translators. Just saying.
@OrinKerr
Orin Kerr
6 years
As one does.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@medeabenjamin @asiatimesonline I have some news for you regarding the terrible truth about jumbo shrimp.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@SMurphyTV @POTUS @KearneyRob @AllBlacks Biden is busy making things happen.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
@seanhannity Remember when Sean Hannity was a man of great stature, who commanded respect from all who met him? Me neither.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
1 year
@JayLouis @ConroyForReal This response makes you sound petty, not clever. In case you were wondering.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
Scrolling through Twitter while watching “The Mandalorian”, and coming to the conclusion that the Proud Boys are basically like even less-competent Imperial Stormtroopers.
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
4 years
Matt Bruenig got himself fired, Neera Tanden didn’t do that. But your “Bad Faith” podcast is appropriately named.
@briebriejoy
Briahna Joy Gray
4 years
Who better to discuss Biden's pick for OMB director, prolific poster, & "progressive" think tank president Neera Tanden than a man who founded a lefty think tank after Tanden got him fired for posting? We spoke to @MattBruenig on the new @BadFaithPod .
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@markyzaguirre
Mark R. Yzaguirre
7 years
@AaronTheH @chrislhayes Thanksgiving is going to be a little tense
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