If you think
@trussliz
was being profligate with her ยฃ500,000 flight to Australia, it turns out that
@BorisJohnson
signed a contract for ยฃ75,000,000 for the lease of that jet from Titan Airways.
It spends most of its time sat on the runway at Stansted and costs us ยฃ72,000 a week
So, according to Katie Hopkins, the next set of "patriotic events" kick of on Wednesday. The targets? "Lefty Lawyers" etc.
I'm not sure quite how long the Home Office can pretend that Hopkins, Farage, Yaxley etc are not part of the problem.
Does anybody know why Boris Johnson's A330 Voyager jet flew to Las Vegas on Monday and this afternoon is flying from Las Vegas to Bermuda?
#JohnsonOut45
BREAKING
@10DowningStreet
and "the Prime Minister has asked
@nadhimzahawi
to resign as Chairman of the Conservative Party and as Minister without Portfolio," a spox told reporters.
"Nadim refused," she added, "so Mr Sunak just sort of wandered off."
Surprising news that disgraced former-PM Boris Johnson plans to spend a week staying at a luxury resort in Sharm El Sheikh, bathing in the Red Sea, rather than rock up in his constituency in Uxbridge or attend Parliament.
#COP27
BREAKING - Pandemonium at the Foreign Office this morning as 211 Foreign Secretaries arrive to take up their position as promised.
#JohnsonOut134
#The148
Surely, the whole point of paying former Prime Ministers a stipend of ยฃ115,000 per annum - is to prevent them needing to pimp their services to the highest bidder?
So they paid 100 x what the (failed) app was worth.
And Air Farce One's paint job is 10 x the going rate for a respray.
Anybody else spotting a trend here?
A moment of sympathy for
@LanceForman
who today found that his century-old family business can no longer export to the EU, US or Japan because of standards issues.
Were we still in the EU, he'd have his principal export left. Sorry Lance, but this one is on you.
#Brexithasfailed
UPDATE Coronavirus's spokesperson says today's events have exceeded even the wildest of expectations.
"The drunken mask-free crowds couldn't have delivered a more perfect environment."
And "a special thanks" to
@BorisJohnson
that nobody else could have delivered this so well.
BREAKING
@10DowningStreet
confirm that letters are being submitted to the 1922 Committee to call a new leadership race.
"Given the race to the bottom of the past 12 years, MPs want to cut to the chase and put Chris Grayling in charge of the country next," a spox told reporters.
A Foreign Secretary goes to an Italian villa, owned by a Russian billionaire - and without his security team - and looks like this the morning after.
What could possibly go wrong?
This is G-GBNI, Johnson's second Presidential Jet.
It has been parked at Stansted Airport since
@trussliz
abandoned the G20 and flew back to campaign as leader.
It still cost the taxpayer ยฃ288,461.53 for the week's rental. As it does every week of its five-year contract.
If the Rwanda hotel experience is so wonderful, as the Daily Mail keeps telling us, I suggest a working group of MPs are taken on the first flight and left there for 90 days.
They can report back after the Summer recess. I suggest
@pritipatel
and
@Mike_Fabricant
for starters.
"Miss Symonds and some other staff had a password enabling them to book a taxi on account.
"Sources claim she disguised the number of cabs she was using by booking them in the names of junior employees without telling them.
.
#Carriegate
#JohnsonOut146
BREAKING -
@10DowningStreet
reports that the PM is absolutely livid to discover that
@RishiSunak
was a US resident.
"Mr Johnson never recalls appointing Rishi and came across him unexpectedly running the Treasury," said a spokesperson. "He was ambushed" she added.
#JohnsonOut75
Our
@Tobias_Ellwood
is getting a lot of heat for pointing out what nobody has dared say since 2016: that leaving the SM is hurting our economy and our people.
That candour may not win him a residence in
@10DowningStreet
, but saying it has shattered the glass Brexit falsehood.
Why does the British Govt continue to contract the services of an Australian company to provide barges in Dorset? The same firm that also supplies Sunak's private jet and contracted the lockdown hotels...
A reminder that
@ChrisPincher
is still a Member of Parliament despite the groping scandal that, arguably, was the final straw that brought down
@borisjohnson
's reign of ignomy.
BREAKING
@10DowningStreet
.
New electronic voting machines will be rolled out across the UK before the next General Election.
"We've asked party donor's
#Fujitsu
to provide the software," a spox told reporters.
#FujitsuPostOfficeScandal
2015: MP rushes towards danger to save a Constable's life in a terror attack.
2022: Johnson fires MP for not following Govt whip on a concocted VONC orchestrated by a departing despot, while said MP is in Moldova discussing security.
@Tobias_Ellwood
The usually monotonous
@TomSwarbrick1
@LBC
show tonight revealed that Hungary has a strategic reserve of 120 days of gas supplies, whereas UK reserves are...
... two days. I kid you not.
Two days.
You have to hand it to the Rwandan Govt. They have Sunak on the ropes.
They can charge any fee.
Impose any new clause.
Decline any renegotiation.
And still walk away with ยฃ170 million without ever hosting more than three people.
All of them Home Secretaries.
#ToryChaos
The mere idea, that the actual PM's wife can
a) be richer than the King.
b) be a non-dom for UK tax while living with the actual Prime Minister of the UK.
c) continue to earn revenues from
@Infosys
's earnings in Russia
beggars belief!
It would appear that Lady Mone is prepared to take the British Govt. down with her.
"[The Govt, Sunak,
@michaelgove
] all knew about my involvement from the very beginning.โ
Delicious!
#ToryCorruption
#PPEScandal
This is Johnson leaving home yesterday. Gone are the crumpled suit and scruffy shoes. Where's he off to now?
Clue: not Uxbridge.
Note the suitcase and Carrie's handbag.
If a non-binding referendum can take Scotland out of the European Union against her wishes, a non-binding referendum can take her out of the United Kingdom if that is what her citizens vote for.
BREAKING
@10DowningStreet
- Prime minister will not be present for the vote on
@BorisJohnson
โs future on Monday due a flash visit to Ukraine.
โTo show his support, the PM will also fly back to Kyiv on Wednesday thus avoiding
#pmqs
,โ a spox told reporters.
Jacob Rees-Mogg claims the Parliamentary Privileges Committee is a "political committee against Boris Johnson" and says Johnson was deposed by "haters of Brexit".
The committee consists of 4 Tory MPs and 3 opposition MPs.
Johnson was deposed by Tory MPs - all voted for Brexit.
Simon Case is trying to block Sue Gray's appointment with Labour for up to a year, as payback for her role in criticising
@10DowningStreet
, according to The Times.
Anybody else spotting a trend?
#SimonCase
#SueGrayReport
(no paywall)
How would Oscar Wilde have put it?
"To spend ยฃ140 million once on a deportation scheme that deported absolutely nobody, might look like carelessness.
To do so twice, looks a lot like a criminal prosecution for Misconduct in Public Office."
#MIPO
#ToryChaos
BREAKING - No 10 confirms it has suspended David Warburton MP after photos surfaced of him next to what appeared to be five lines of cocaine.
A spox said, "we would have expected at least a dozen lines and a crate of vodka from any self-respecting Conservative."
#JohnsonOut69
We truly crossed the Rubicon today, when
@William_Wragg
decided to "resign the whip" to prevent
@RishiSunak
having to decide to do it.
Has there ever been a more useless PM?
How on earth are these
#Radio2
salaries justifiable?
Zoe Ball - ยฃ1,360,000-ยฃ1,364,999
Graham Norton - ยฃ725,000-ยฃ729,999
Steve Wright - ยฃ475,000-ยฃ479,999
Vanessa Feltz - ยฃ405,000-ยฃ409,999
Ken Bruce - ยฃ385,000-ยฃ389,999
Claudia Winkleman - ยฃ365,000-ยฃ369,999
Forget the duck houses - this is political dynamite and, unless I am mistaken, the end (rightly so) of all MP second incomes.
Well done
@ByDonkeys
, well done!
Did I miss
@borisjohnson
or
@DominicRaab
announce sending the UK Army & specialist equipment to help the Germans, Dutch & Belgians with their catastrophic floods?
BREAKING
@10DowningStreet
- an RAF jet has been despatched to Maryland (USA) this afternoon.
"The crew have been ordered to capture former-PM
@trussliz
and return her to her care facility in the United Kingdom before she does any more damage," a spox told reporters.
#CPAC
People are missing the whole point of the
#BibbyStockholm
- this not about solving anything, it is about lighting a culture war in the hope that it may minimise Tory losses.
"And I speak to you now from my new incredibly small
#Brexit
crisis desk which, as you may have realised, is as diminished as my relevance on the world stage."
#JohnsonOut31
Watching Glasto this evening, I'm struck by the true super-power of the UK - that global melting pot of culture, food, music that we should be celebrating.
We are so much better than
#ReformUK
The UK's sole cod catching vessel (cost ยฃ52m) unable to catch cod because Norway turned down "fair and reasonable offer" from the UK, putting "hundreds of jobs" at risk.
Couldn't have seen that coming.
#BrexitReality
#BrexitDisaster
@BorisJohnson
And since we're celebrating the (political) funeral of one of the country's greatest thinkers, let's just cherish the moment that
@DominicRaab
as Brexit Secretary discovered Dover.
We come not to bury
@William_Wragg
, but ask how the fcuk he retains access to Parliament while utterly compromised.
@CommonsSpeaker
this is on you.
Lola is not holding her breath.