letmeout @letmeout55 Twitter profile

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letmeout

2 years

6 years ago I was a homeless IV drug addict who thought life was over. I wanted to die Today, at 55, I just earned a bachelor's degree in psychology, with straight A's. There is always hope. It's not over until the last breath

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letmeout

@letmeout55

4 years

I'm a 53 year old recovering addict who screwed up my life a great deal. I have almost 5 years clean. I started college in the fall and just got notified- I made the Dean's List!!

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letmeout

@letmeout55

3 years

I dropped out of high school when I was 15, and spent a tortured lifetime immersed in my addiction. I’m 54 now, 5.5 years clean. Today is the first day of my senior year in college. I can’t even believe it #RecoveryPosse

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letmeout

@letmeout55

2 years

I got a nice message from a MAGA republican. He told me I should go back to being a homeless drug addict, because I share openly about my long-term recovery. It didn’t hurt my feelings, because the message said more about him than it did me

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letmeout

@letmeout55

2 years

In 2019 I was raped. I’ve stayed in the dark, locked house almost all the time since then. No hiking, being out at night, or feeling safe anywhere I got a rescue GS dog who’d been in the shelter for a year. We have been healing each other’s hearts one hike at a time

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letmeout

@letmeout55

2 years

I used to be one of those addicts you passed in the streets. I thought about dying every day. I got clean in jail at 49. Today, I celebrate 7 years clean. I’m in grad school, about to have a real career for the first time. I’ll graduate at 57. It’s never too late to live

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letmeout

@letmeout55

5 months

I did it! I graduated with my Master’s degree at 57! I received this message from my brother. It may be TMI, but I share it because there’s always hope for a different life

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letmeout

@letmeout55

2 years

I’m a 55 year old recovering addict. It’s my first day of grad school. I never thought I’d be here. I’m nervous, excited, feeling impostery. Recovery has taught me it’s ok to feel those things. I just have to keep moving past those feelings to succeed. #RecoveryPosse

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letmeout

@letmeout55

2 years

6 years ago I was a 49 year old homeless drug addict, parked in the county jail. Yesterday I secured a really coveted internship for grad school. If you think it's too late to change your life, I promise it isn't. #RecoveryPosse

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letmeout

@letmeout55

2 years

Im a 55 year old recovering addict who just finished my first semester of grad school. Did I feel like I couldn’t do it, almost every day? Yes. Did I do it? Also yes. Keep doing the thing you think you can’t do

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letmeout

@letmeout55

4 years

@deweybbadd I was so afraid to start. I didn't think they would want me. I didn't think I could do it, and I thought it was too late. The world needs your cooking

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letmeout

@letmeout55

4 years

@MeidasTouch I'm a Covid-unemployed single parent, watching our country and democracy die a horrible death, and #ImVotingForJoe to return America to sanity and not condemn my kids to this madness

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@letmeout55

7 months

I ordered my cap and gown. I’ll be 57 when I graduate with my MSW in May. I’ve been in school 4 years- half as long as I’ve been clean. I’m so glad to be done, but it’s a little scary too. Much of my identity has become succeeding in school. #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

Another fight with addict son, until I cried, then I was finally able to say what is on my heart- I love you. I miss you-the real you. I’m your biggest fan, and your life can be so much more than it is now. I can’t control the outcome, but he goes to sober living Tuesday

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@letmeout55

3 years

I used to walk by homes in the cold, looking at the people inside, thinking I could never be part of life again. 1 day clean was torture. I wanted to die, but I couldn’t escape myself I have 6 years clean today. #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

For many years I was a hopeless, homeless addict, a felon. I just wanted to die. At 49 I got clean. This week I became part of a team that goes out with police on mental health crisis calls. I have life I could never have imagined #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

Last year, when I started college, I cried a lot. A lifetime of drug addiction made my brain mush, but it's healing. This semester was much easier. I got a 98 or higher in every class, including biopsych. Straight A's again, baby #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

6 yrs ago I was homeless. I was shooting drugs because I hated myself and my life. I had no hope and thought death was my only way out, and I wanted it. I was 48. I’m living proof that it’s never too late to have a different life. We do recover #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

Watching my son deteriorate into addiction is so heartbreaking. He’s a shell of his normal self, and he can’t see it. When he’s clean he shines like the sun. The way he is now reminds me of Gollum. Fuck drugs

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@letmeout55

4 years

@EsotericMike I love hearing that. There was a big ol biker in a meeting who spoke about how afraid he was to start school. He inspired me

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@letmeout55

3 years

The graduate school I wanted to attend only has a 50% acceptance rate. I just found out I got in. #recoveryposse

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@letmeout55

3 years

Dealing with my addict son is draining me. I’ve worked so hard to build a life as part of society, rather than being on the fringe. I live my life differently now, and he keeps bringing the addict chaos back in. I know the lines I have to draw for my sanity, but it’s so damn hard

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@letmeout55

3 years

Having my son home from prison has healed a part of my heart that was frozen. He just texted me goodnight and said “you’re my best friend, Momma.” Thanks to recovery I am present in all four sons’ lives today. There’s nothing better than this #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

I made the Deans list again. I was afraid to start school in my 50’s. This recovering addict was too old, too broken, not good enough. Every part of the process terrified me. I learned to just move one inch at a time #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

While I was in a locked rehab 5 years ago, my son was arrested and sent to prison. A huge part of my heart has been missing. I haven’t touched his face in 5 years. He comes home Sunday #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

I am on my way to Hawaii this morning, with two women I’ve been friend with for 35 years. I never thought I’d be able to have a real life, but here I am! Recovery is real!

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@letmeout55

3 years

My upstairs neighbor makes my life hell. I’ve asked politely about the music, tried to compromise. I’m done. I’m older, and I have way better speakers. The power of Metallica is on my side. Don’t fuck with Gen X

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@letmeout55

4 years

This is what recovery from addiction looks like. 5 years clean today. I spent my 49th birthday in jail- hopeless, homeless, and broken. I thought my life was over. Today I'm a full-time mom, community member, and a straight A college student. It's never too late.

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@letmeout55

4 years

@AndrewMRossi @LinDorton It's so hard sometimes. My brain doesn't retain information like it used to, but it's getting better

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@letmeout55

4 years

Sunday I tweeted about my addiction and recovery. You people surrounded me with love, support and encouragement. I felt like the whole world hugged me. I am honored and so touched. I haven't gotten to read everything or follow back yet, but I will. Thank you!

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@letmeout55

4 years

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@letmeout55

3 years

@kingmanmarie39 I was struggling, being alone and feeling shitty all the time. All my kids came home for a minute, and it reminded me that my life has been beautiful. It gave me the motivation to start the couch-to-5k program. Exercise is becoming a huge help

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@letmeout55

2 years

@RpsAgainstTrump

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@letmeout55

3 years

@BohoLobo Sometimes I can’t believe I made it out. I spent so many years of my life just wanting to die. I feel so lucky

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@letmeout55

3 years

My mom died 5 min after I had them take her off life support. I haven’t been able to cry yet. She was so abusive, yet could be angelicly sweet, too. She never really parented me, it feels strange to be parent less, and to have these decisions to make

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@letmeout55

2 years

@TomFitton

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@letmeout55

2 years

@vtgstickerlove We've been exploring so many cool places. I think the worst part of everything was losing my ability to feel safe in nature. He makes me feel safe again

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@letmeout55

4 years

The last five years of my addiction, I thought of suicide every single day. I didn't believe I could have a life. In five years of recovery, I've thought of it several times. It hasn't been easy. I've been planting seeds in my life that are just now flowering. Don't give up

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@letmeout55

4 years

@TVA1967 @DanRather God, I love Dan Rather!!! His tweets have to be my favorite

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@letmeout55

3 years

My son just casually told me he has a boyfriend, right before he slipped back into his cave. I’m at his door, begging for scraps. What is his name? When can I meet him? Show me a picture? Im so flipping excited!

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@letmeout55

3 years

My son started an LGBTQ supportive charter highschool today. Most of the students are LGBTQ, and he’s so excited to not be a minority there. Imagine how freeing this will be for him! I’m excited to see him be able to fully express himself

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@letmeout55

1 year

In May I’ll earn my MSW. This year I practice being a clinician, with 10-15 clients of my own. I’m humbled, honored, and nervous AF 7 years ago I was a homeless IV addict. The court system gave me tiny chance, disguised as punishment, and I’m never gonna stop running with it

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@letmeout55

3 years

This is one of the happiest moments of my recovery. It’s the first time in 10 years that I am with all four of my sons, my dil, and my grandson. My family is healing #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

Depression is kicking my ass. It lies and says nothing is ok, and it never will be. I have every reason to live, but it tells me I don't. I've been in bed for days. Today I'm gonna take small steps, accomplish one thing every hour, and try to stay off my bed #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

2 years

@RonJohnsonWI

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2 years

@stclairashley

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@letmeout55

3 years

One of my big regrets in wasting a life stuck in addiction is that I didn’t travel. I found at last night that I get to go to Hawaii in January. I’m beyond excited. I haven’t been on a plane in 20 years, and I feel terribly anxious about airports. What do I need to know?

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@letmeout55

3 years

I’ve shrunk to 5’3 1/4, while all my sons are over 6’1. Coincidence? I think not. This is what raising teenagers will do to you. Save yourselves

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@letmeout55

3 years

I stood on s step stool and measured my sons, because it’s the first time I’ve been able to in a million years. The little one is 6’1, the two middles are both 6’4, and the big one is 6’6 1/2. I have 25 feet of sons

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@letmeout55

3 years

All my life I have despised running. I chose it now because of depression and lethargy. On my worst depression days I would get less than 200 steps per day. 6 weeks ago I could only run 1 min at a time. Today, I ran 30, and it wasn't even hard. Couch-to-5k is changing my life

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@letmeout55

3 years

Today I had a homeless client. He was so broken, crying, explaining what a shit show his life is- always walking, nowhere to rest, always carrying what few things he owns. He can’t take his meds because he doesn’t have access to water. Forfuckssake, we have to do better than this

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@letmeout55

2 years

@Jim_Jordan You mean the guy who raised our taxes while pretending to give us a break? That’s right, it was only for the rich, just like the PPP loans where millions upon millions of dollars were given to his rich buddies on our dime

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@letmeout55

4 years

@JustLikeBecky @MatthewJshow @WhiteHouse @realDonaldTrump He's just so busy from all the lying, lining his pockets, trying to steal our rights in one way or another, and butchering the english language, that it's all he has the energy left to accomplish

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@letmeout55

4 years

Damn, this has been a good, emotional week. We've been living in two rented bedrooms since I lost my job. We were just approved for our own apartment. I am bawling.

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@letmeout55

2 years

Yesterday I finally told addict son he can’t stay here bc it’s affecting other sons’ emotionally. All day he railed at me by text. I never loved him, he’s bleeding (shows pictures), he never wants to see me again, he hates me. My heart is fucking broken 1/2

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@letmeout55

3 years

Since being sexually assaulted 2 years ago, my world has gotten small. I no longer hike alone. I keep my windows barred. I don’t let anyone in. I want myself back, but she is gone, and I’m not sure who this person left behind is. She feels like a shell, still

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@letmeout55

3 years

@acnewsitics I feel like he's cheating on me then, since he was also here to take Christmas, my toilet, and any hamburgers lurking around the house. He also dropped off an entire small country of immigrants and asked me to hide them

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@letmeout55

3 years

In Sept I lost my county job because of Covid budget cuts. I got so depressed. Yesterday I interviewed for a similar position and I got the job!!!! I have a job!! Finally a job!! And I love it. I get to go out with mental health counselors on police calls. I’m crying!!

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@letmeout55

3 years

It’s a great day to never go to jail again because I’m clean #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

2 years

I'm too old to need an abortion, but I live in California. If you ever need to come visit your "aunt" here, message me. I will pick you up at the airport, give you my bed, and take care of you for a few days. #GOPHandsmaidsTale

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@letmeout55

3 years

The reason I choose social work for low pay is that as a child, my ACES score was 10. Not a single person cared enough to intervene. I spent a tortured lifetime with all the wrong coping skills. I'm still learning how to live. I want to be the person that makes a difference

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@letmeout55

4 years

I’ve lived through domestic violence, natural disaster, homelessness, rape, losing my kids, being a felon, suicide attempts, and addiction. At 5 years clean I know there’s nothing you can’t come back from. Keep going. It’s not over

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@letmeout55

2 years

@ReginaSinclai15 @mnbeamj @DashDobrofsky “BLOATUS” that made me snort laugh

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@letmeout55

1 year

This beautiful boy was in a shelter for a year before we found each other. He smiles with his entire body, and I am honored to be his person #Rescues

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@letmeout55

2 years

@crss1969 @BlackKnight10k I have them all bolted really well, but in an apartment. I swear my new boy can hear something going on a block away.

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@letmeout55

2 years

It’s a struggle to manage grad school, internship and work at 55, but I am learning and developing so much. I feel like a real person, maybe for the first time in my life without drugs I used to watch recovering people and think that could never be me, but it is

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@letmeout55

3 years

Not to be morbid, but my moms body went to science. They file the death certificate, pick up the body, wherever it is, use it for learning, and then cremate and return the ashes to you in a beautiful urn. It doesn’t cost anything, and it actually helps the universe.

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@letmeout55

3 years

California, I'm getting real sick of your shit. Entire summers/falls gone to fire. Air so smoky and hazardous you can't go outside. Trees falling everywhere, when they're not too busy being on fire. Power shut offs constantly. I feel like we've wrecked our planet pretty good

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@letmeout55

2 years

It took a year for me to be able to set this boundary. I ache because I know the addiction tells him all these things are true, but they are lies. I would carry him over hot coals to save him if I could. My heart will never be whole without him

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@letmeout55

2 years

@GOP This is really not true. Most of us understand what is happening with inflation, which will only get worse if Republicans are allowed to keep lining their pockets at our expense

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@letmeout55

3 years

I didn't want to take meds, but nothing makes the depression stop. It's like a big blanket over my head, blotting out all the good. Fine, I'll try this. First 3 days I couldn't eat or sleep. Yesterday I took a picture and I realized I hadn't in so long. Maybe...

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@letmeout55

3 years

Recovery from addiction isn't easy. Depression and a lifetime of trauma make some days really hard, but those days pass, and I gain ground in this new life. No feeling lasts forever, no matter what your head tells you. Keep your eye on the prize of recovery #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

2 years

@Nursing_Heretic @LbudisaLila Nice for you, but with a $10,000 bounty on our heads, we can't afford to trust anyone

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2 years

@TudorDixon @DougDucey

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2 years

@lavern_spicer

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@letmeout55

3 years

I made the Dean’s list again at Chico State. I’m 54, and a recovering addict. It was terrifying to begin, but new life is entirely possible, no matter how far down we are to start. One sober foot in front of the other #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

I'm not a mean person, but forfuckssake, please stop saying "I seen...", or "we seen..." I have seen so many people using this recently, and it makes me want to poke my own eyes out with a stick. How about trying "I saw...", or "we saw..." This makes me so tense

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@letmeout55

2 years

I went to a college ceremony. I was going to leave bc I felt out of place. They described the recipient of a big award. I compared myself to them, thinking I’m not near as good. It was meee! I forget how much I’ve changed in recovery. #RecoveryPosse

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2 years

@TheLeoTerrell

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@letmeout55

2 years

I’ve worked so hard to pull my life out of the gutter of addiction. Every part of me had to be rebuilt. I just got a promotion from Peer Support to Counselor I at Behavioral Health. Life is pretty exciting, and I’m here for it

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@letmeout55

4 years

@MeidasTouch My finances are ruined. We gave up our home to live in 2 rented bedrooms. UI is $189 weekly. Trump doesn’t care. My country is divided in a way I’ve never seen #TrumpDepression

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2 years

@mchooyah

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3 years

@BPrevitus @AndifromWI As a woman the same age, I can tell you that you should absolutely be your goofy, silly self. That’s the hottest thing there is, other than kindness

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@letmeout55

3 years

Emotional today. I looked back at the last messages between my son and I before he went to prison. I was living in a "crack" house, trying to OD, about to be arrested for the last time. How did I escape that life? What a gift it is to be clean, to have hope, #recoveryposse

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@letmeout55

3 years

I’m 55 today. I now qualify for the senior discount at restaurants. I’m not sure one dollar is worth it. I wish I could get a little trophy or something instead

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@letmeout55

3 years

People think being an addict is a moral failing, but that isn’t it at all. It’s a soul sickness like a cancer. It’s roots deepen inside you, twisting every part. When you wake from it, the despair is so deep, that it sends you right back. Push past that #RecoveryPosse

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@letmeout55

3 years

I dropped my adult son off at the sober living house yesterday. He’s only a mile down the road, but I miss him already. It occurred to me that this is like the white trash version of dropping your kid off at their college dorm

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@letmeout55

2 years

I want to be there for addict son, but instead of helping, I'm letting him drag us into chaos. If he wants to be here, he has to be making an effort daily. Recovery isn't something that's always a month away, it's right now, every day. I'm writing and posting the clear rules

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@letmeout55

3 years

Just took an Uber. The driver explained the pandemic to me. He said I should follow the masks to see who’s making the money, and that the WHO is in the shots, because they decided there are too many people and they have to kill some off. Send brain bleach ASAP

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@letmeout55

3 years

Omicron led to pneumonia. My bp, normally 120/80 is 156/100. Pulse, usually 60, races up to 120 while sitting. It’s scary! I’m glad I have savings, because I haven’t worked in a month. I am the one with the compromised immune system that you protect with masks. Thank you.

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@letmeout55

3 years

Money scares the hell out of me. I was poor my entire childhood, and most of my adult life. I'm not sure how it happened- a series of events that added up over time, but if I'm careful, I'll never have to worry again. That is so freaky and weird to me

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@letmeout55

4 years

@BMeiselas I’m a Californian too. We’re probably supposed to pick up our special masks where we pick up our forest rakes

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@letmeout55

3 years

We have a different kind of family

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@letmeout55

3 years

Sometimes people say that my story is inspiring. I want you to know there are very dark days, days I can't dress or do much other than be a ball of anxiety and depression. If you feel that way, it's not the end. It's just one spot on a wheel. Keep moving forward. You arent alone

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@letmeout55

2 years

@DianaDemarest I've never had one before, He's so smart and so funny.

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3 years

#NewProfilePic

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2 years

@MonicaCrowley

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@letmeout55

2 years

Graduate school feels insanely hard. I have low moments where my head says there’s no way I can do this. My brain is old, and feels like it’s full of holes. I’m not stopping, though. One foot in front of the other. That’s all I have to do

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@letmeout55

3 years

I watch my son in active addiction. He fights the whole world- everything is a personal affront. He’s tormented, and I hate it. I recognize it because it used to be me. It makes me see how much I’ve grown #RecoveryPosse

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2 years

@NickAdamsinUSA

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