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Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯 Profile
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯

@jencoleslaw

2,966
Followers
2,325
Following
4,966
Media
51,171
Statuses

Find me EVERYWHERE else as @ jencoleslaw & podcasts: Two Chocolate Cakes, SideCar w/ Jen Coleslaw & aJENda Podcast

mastodon.world/@jencoleslaw
Joined December 2008
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
Folks have been kind enough to send stuff and now I have a dedicated address where it will not get swiped, or melted, or be carried off by owls. If you send a regional snack or a recipe I can talk about it on SideCar!
@twochoccakes
Two Chocolate Cakes 🎂 Podcast / SideCar Podcast
2 years
I have a mailing address now if you feel the need to send copies of old handwritten recipes, or if you're the Lindt truffle people wanting me to try a new flavor 🙂 8665 Sudley Road #150 Manassas, VA 20110
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
@AITA_reddit Anyone else think that the husband is not so much an asshole but maybe a serial killer?
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@dog_rates @dannkong Chilly & Griffin nappin’ in a bed One uses the other as a pillow for his head They both look soft and 100% cuddle Surely all doges want to be in that puddle. The bed looks big so pile right on & listen as I sing you this pupperdog song. (quietly tho, because they's sleeping')
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
Today is a good day to save a dog.
@dog_rates
WeRateDogs
2 years
This is Rue. She was found severely emaciated and living in an abandoned building. Her diaphragm is broken, allowing her organs to shift and potentially crush her heart or lungs. She’s safe now, and you can help her get the surgery she needs below ❤️‍🩹
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@dog_rates @kleedew Thanks for the pupdate!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@dog_rates Oh Todd I bet you never thought when you went out for a walk that you’d be talkin’ one for the team now recovering from a rattlesnake dream Now you’re the hero in this story with yr golden schnoozze of glory!! So rest up fren & feel better soon so you can run & play & zoom
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@dog_rates On Fridays we take a deep breath (because we can) & we reach into our pockets (when we can) & we support our frens (as best we can) who need surgeries. Blue doesn't get enough air so it only seems fair to pay contribute a share so he can live w/out a care (but w/ lots of flair)
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
@dogfather Can we get a page-a-day calendar of just these kinds of responses? I would pay double.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@dog_rates @zachbraff it would be so cool if it was like a wiper blade.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Today, the tennis ball launcher came. Rodeo Clown was a little confused but I think he'll eventually get it but we need like 100 tennis balls because he doesn't bring them back. In other news, he had a visitor today who brought some offerings. He was pleased. 👑
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
Hey @TheGoldenRatio4 look what I found today. We should do a one of them charity Ks in honor of Hops and raise some shredded cheese for doggie prosthetics for less fortunate dogs or cancer research.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
@nickwestphal @darth @Kevinliptakcnn They should also sign away their rights to use hospitals.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Does anyone need a boop? On this schnoop?
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
Someone, who's name rhymes with Shady Rug, at an entire cherry pie today and wasn't a bit sorry. @darth
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
I donated in honor of Hops- May we tell every fish we see that she was loved, that she will be missed, and to take good care of our Mermaid Queen. Help support The Golden Ratio Foundation
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
Barny has left the building. Thank you, everyone for your support and kind words. We had a good experience with our friends who treated us all with care and love.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
So, @TheGoldenRatio4 and @GoldenRatioFdn what do you think of this?
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
We let Mimi go into the great kitty unknown last night after we found that she had a sudden onset of a kind of autoimmune anemia that only MIGHT have been treated with a series of transfusions. At almost 15 years old, it did not seem like something we should put her thru.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
Listening to @TheGoldenRatio4 podcast this morning & just had this thought, I know you're sad that his health/epilepsy didn't get better, But his LIFE was x100,000 better with @jenrunswithdogs & @IngoBurghardt I wish we had made him our 4th board member for @GoldenRatioFdn 🤍
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
Waffles has joined #TeamGreenBean with @TheGoldenRatio4 but he eats them one at a time, in bed.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
So who wants to hear about our new highland cow/ grocery run?
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
I see that #Remi is trending and I just assume he won his elected office! Happy Birthday Remoulade, you smell better than old cod you're 100% not a fraud with caramel fur & dog dad bod you're definitely a little odd but a pretty good addition to the squad @TheGoldenRatio4
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
Hey @darth I'd like to report that Ladybug was a very good dog this week.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
So I have interesting little tidbit story! As you many of you know I have been a cancer patient for the last 8 months, a cancer that my dog Ladybug 🐞 detected back in December 2020.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
You guys, Peat has been reading #MuellerReport and he has some thoughts.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
@eve_ettinger Just an FYI to anyone interested-I have a friend in Kansas who will take your mixer and paint it (professionally!) any color you want. And he'll service it so it is like new. You can find him in insta Mr._Mixer_ and the TikTok as Mr_Mixer. Tell him I sentchoo. ❤️
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@dog_rates @sventhelost @AlexaBliss_WWE We should really discourage bodyshaming the good dogs.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Big Red Goofus Burger Update: This time we did it a little bit different, he was sedated into a full sleep, gave him his shot, and woke him up and now we're on our way home. He also got the full spa treatment, nail trim and paw fur trim and ear clean.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
First, no one is being held down and vaccinated against their will. Second anyone who equates mandatory vaccines with rape has clearly never been assaulted before, so miss me with that particular repulsive hot fucking take, my dudes.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
Hi friends, I wonder if I could ask a favor. Barny is not doing well tonight and it's time to let him go. But he is hanging on so I need everyone to get into their Box of Zen, and tell him that it's okay to go. His shift is over and we can take it from here.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
. @darth wake up, darth. First day of spring
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
Here. It is going to be a rough day. Remember that someone loves you & wants you to not self harm. Eat a decent meal if you can. Drink some water. Get some fresh air. Take a few deep breaths. Take your meds. If you're not sure who that person is right now, it's me and Ladybug. ❤️
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@dog_rates @_byoung17 Behold poor Melly and her swollen smelly let's make her a snack and plop in front of the telly popcorms & pb in our bellies Later, a walk in the rain in our favorite wellies to the beach to watch the swellies, but first, maybe a benadrylies. Feel better, Melly! <3
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
The speed at which Team Nacho Transport for @GoldenRatioFdn was put together has me wondering what else @jengolbeck and @tine_theherd should be figuring out for this country?
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@dog_rates Chance is running out of legs On which he often stands This dog colored white & nutmeg Wld love to learn to dance and maybe do a waltzes (Cuz of course its not his faultses) So dip into your pockets, dears & pull out some $ So Chance can dance w/out fear W/ a fancy tie & collar
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
We were able to go up to the clinic a little earlier and so ladybug has moved on. It was peaceful and lovely and all of her friends came and gave her kisses. We had ice cream with peanut butter cups and we all shared a bottle of Peeps Pepsi because she would love that.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
@RoxanneSaylor @AdamSerwer That's a bridge too far, Roxanne
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
We are on our way to our first heartworm treatment.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
One of our favorite Jens has a birthday today. Can you guess which one? #HappyBirthdayJen
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
This dog just ate the loaf of bread I bought specifically for French Toast dinner tonight!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
I got an Easter Basket from my sister yesterday. It had a chocolate bunny, some gummy bunnies and a pack of white chocolate dipped dog biscuits for Ladybug and Waffles. LB thinks she should get one early to make sure it isn't stale or anything. @darth
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@dog_rates Riley looks for frens, my fren While he waits upon the wall A patient doge whose love transcends Through his beloved tennis ball So if you pass this way, my fren please provide this task so small And pick up his toy again It’s required by good fren protocol. @darth
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Hi, it's Blueberry 🫐
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@CoryMichaly @kylegriffin1 Yes. They don't care about other people.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
It's me. I am this cat.
@stevenhalter
Steve Halter
2 years
@JortsTheCat Our cat once was limping. It turned out he had a cherry cough drop stock to the bottom of his paw. He didn’t like the taste when he tried to remove it and so decided that was just his life now. (We removed the cough drop.)
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
Here are some pics of Baby Big Sugar to cleanse your timeline.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
I'd just assume it was @jengolbeck but I don't think she's in FL this week.
@proletarat
tara
1 year
Everybody at this Home Depot is getting hurricane supplies except this one woman is buying the 12 foot skeleton
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
So I know folks have been waiting patiently for an update on Rufus Doofus Texas Toast Red Hot Chili Pupperoni Brisket Crunchwrap Supreme: He is still pretty sick with an upper respiratory infection (kennel cough) and he & Waffles have to be separated so Waffles doesn't get sick.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
How bonkers is that!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
A Little Extra was built to help pets like Rufus Russo Rojas; his 1st adopters couldn't have paid for his heartworm treatment. Rufus is @GoldenRatioFdn adjacent and his care is covered, but ALE helps close the gap between care & cost for other pets,
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
The official @jengolbeck pride rainbow inflatable has been deployed
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
@TheGoldenRatio4 Golden Ratio Camping Services tee shirt STAT
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@jjcj0294 @chrissyteigen DO NOT THROW SHADE AT PEANUTBUTTER!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
She is so pleased with herself. She wants a special vest that says Cancer Detecting Blind Dog (who also does economics reports)
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
Today is #GingerCatAppreciationDay so let's see your kitties. I'll start with Peat.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
So this is what is going on at my house today. Cherry and peach blossoms, plus ice follies daffodils
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
An Update on Rufus Poofus all around Doofus: He is finished with his 30 days of doxy and now he will have 30 days of it continuing to work, then he'll start his heartworm shots, so around first week of July. He'll be on crate rest for 60 days or more after that.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
9 months
ROCKET RUFUS RUPDATE: Guess who is at sleep away camp with @TheGoldenRatio4 's favorite trainer MICHAEL? I already have gotten 6 videos of him playing with his new besties Garrus and Proximo in the woods, and splashing in the stream. Everyone is going to sleep well tonight.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Things Rockin Roddy Radler destroyed today: 1. Small cat bed- 100% 2. Full sized ottoman - 50% 3. Tennis Ball 2x 100%
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
I do not know about you, but there are not enough hugs in a day these days.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
8 months
Guess who is coming home from Reform School Sleep Away Camp? Trainer Michael is bringing him home to get a lesson with us here and we have missed him so much!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
8 months
Happy Birthday @jenrunswithdogs !!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
RufusTrufusWishHeWasYoufus update: Tomorrow he gets his last heartworm shot. Because he is such a berserker at the vet they may fully sedate him so please hold some good thoughts for him tomorrow (probably mid to late afternoon) We are near the end!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
Can I get a ruling @TheGoldenRatio4 - blep or melm?
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@dog_rates Winston Winston walked down the hall Winston Winston fell off the wall He fell on the rug And is cute as a bug (after a hug) Then did a Ted Talk on the perils of Urban Sprawl.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
On this day 5 years ago, Waffles was rescued.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
Please do not violate my HIPPO
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
I feel like @IngoBurghardt Should go out of the country more often @jenrunswithdogs --just think of the dogs we could amass.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@dog_rates Fish are frens To you & me They belong not here But in the sea & I keep tellin But no one listen So now I’m yelling’ My wild eyes glisten So I make a stream Right 2 the water A fishies dream I have to, I gotta. And if I had to I’d do it again Oh yes I whoo Cuz fish is my fren
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Speaking of 🌊 @KAZurcher Someone is absolutely bonkers for his splash pad. We were so shocked at how much fun he was having, just absolute joy we didn't video it until he got a bit tired!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 years
@dog_rates O Lana, I bet when you got up today You were so sure that you would slay & you would make that epic jump but instead you fell down with a thump & your bud on the other bed Did nothing to assist you overhead Keep on tryin that leap my fren- cuz we know success isn't "if" but when.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
Thanks for the great masks @CincinnatiZoo we love them. When I put on the red panda one I suddenly crave smosh potato extra crispy. @darth
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
7 months
Big Red says "Dis is not enuff. Moar snows. Come on."
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
Ok so we never heard back from the goat people BUT BUT BUT there's a local LAMB MOWING company! and I am going to have them come out and tell me if we're good candidates! I am so excited. LOOK HOW FLUFFY THEY ARE!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Ok friends, here's the story of my grocery trip. As you know I live in the DMV, not that far from the Northern @TheGoldenRatio4 household. So the other day (Monday) I get a message from my friend Lauren who lives at the other end of the county...
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
@dog_rates Ladybug!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
8 months
Someone is excited to meet his grandparents
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
@calicocaty Seriously. WHO IS IN CHARGE IN THOSE HOUSEHOLDS? I mean, I could come home with a HUMAN CHILD and Ben would be like, "I guess we should get another bed and some furniture and do we know what this little person eats?" without blinking an EYE.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
@mariskreizman @darth Ladybug had an icebreaker joke already to go.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
An update on Canine O'Brien: He's done with the kennel cough antibiotics but had to wait another 14 days before he's allowed back into the animal hospital for testing for his heartworm. He clearly feels fine. I however have two paw print bruises on my pubic bone. 😬
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 years
To whom it may concern: no one likes the corn. Please get more peanuts. Thank you in advance for your anticipated cooperation. -Tim
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
9 months
Do you all remember when we raised money last month for Dixie who needed a heart surgery? I heard from her mom today and she's doing great! She got her stitches out today and got her doggy flu shot!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
3 months
Rufus was very excited to go for a walk with his dragon. He didn't know which way to go first.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@johnlegend I love that I have a good health insurance plan. I suspect that I have a kind of Stockholm syndrome because I am so afraid of losing it. I would not say that I LOVE MY PLAN. I just love that I have one so I don't die or go bankrupt. I suspect folks are a lot like me.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
5 years
@dog_rates @WboolPenguins Tula fights the good fight protecting all penguins in sight she worked all day & night never wrong, only right & now it's time to rest because she's done her best new dogs protecc the nests from the east to the west They all past the test Because of Tula, & we're so impressed. <3
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
The Animal Hospital where I have been volunteering has been caring for this working farm dog who was seemingly shot by a neighbor and left for dead. His vet bill will be a big one. You can also call the hospital and pay some toward his bill
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Hey so @GoldenRatioFdn @TheGoldenRatio4 . Ben and I are going out for some groceries this morning. You all need anything? 👓
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
So friends of SideCar know I started a small nonprofit organization that provides small medical grants for pet health care, and it is called A Little Extra. I spent the last few months getting tax docs and business permits/ banking etc and I'm ready to start taking donations.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
I struggled with whether to tell folks now or wait til Saturday but I really do want the good vibes & energy tomorrow night for my dear Ladybug so I'm posting this public patreon this now so you can join us virtually in celebrating a life well lived.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
2 years
A reminder that if you’re a fan of @ElieNYC and the work he does here on Twitter and on TV (FOR FREE) you should subscribe to @thenation —I just renewed my subscription for another year—$29 for a year of print and digital plus a newsletter in my email.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
Dropped off the Maple Frosted Dognut at the hospital and they put him in isolation because he *may* also have kennel cough 😷 This is the worst harness, BTW.
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
@darth DARTH! I met a baby possum yesterday. Her name is Peppermint! She has a wonky jaw just like me!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 months
Thanks for all the birthday wishes! I got a new inflatable!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
@CNBCnow and do what with the gains?
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
4 years
@dog_rates Waffles!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
6 months
Rufus is officially cured!
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@jencoleslaw
Jen Coleslaw 🥥💯
1 year
@TheGoldenRatio4 "On my way" Rufus
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