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jamie amalea pappas Profile
jamie amalea pappas

@jamieamalea

3,586
Followers
737
Following
5,016
Media
30,143
Statuses

jokes and opinions are my own. both are terrible. more content avail on my OF.

215
Joined February 2011
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
easily the funniest thing I’ve seen happen all year.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
Don’t blame COVID for cancelling your holidays. Blame the government that did nothing while 250,000+ people died, lost their jobs, and fell into poverty.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
what in the wildwood boardwalk is that…
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
I saw this vicious fight at John Heinz Wildlife Refuge. It’s one of my favorite places to watch birds, see turtle fights and to ignore humans.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
Kris Bryant is coming here. He just has to. The Phillies have to make their annual move that sucks me back in so I hate myself for another 6 months like with every guy I’ve ever dated.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
Thinking about all the times I defended Ben Simmons. He didn’t deserve me.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
happy father’s day.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
If Trea Turner comes here… I’m sleeping in CBP until opening day.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
@JohnFetterman I know you hate Wawa and I get it, but it’s also very apparent you’ve never stumbled out of a Sea Isle bar into the holy land that is a 4 am Wawa in the summertime.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
SO FREAKIN EXCITED
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
playoffs.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
Every season I defend the sport of baseball. I can never defend MLB itself. They run the league into the ground. Baseball as a sport? Top tier. MLB as a league? Straight garbage.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
business casual for game day.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
5 months
please, dear gawd people, enjoy the Phillies now. enjoy every gd minute of it.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
Someone just sent me this and I nearly cried. Rhys is it. He’s our guy.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
Jean Segura - running through that stop sign like a true Philadelphian
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
playoff mode
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
in honor of @JHarden13 and supporting our hoagie prince @ericjawn
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
This you?
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@Patriots
New England Patriots
4 years
Black Lives Matter.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
absolutely worth my first bid on ebay.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
5 years
I don’t trust you if you don’t trust the process
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
Who is coming to the Phils game with me Apr 9th? Applicants must be: -hot -knowledgeable about baseball, funny or quiet -at least 6’1 (will consider 5’10-6’ for the right candidate) -willing to get me drinks during the top half of the innings -able to win a fight
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
he’s definitely wearing flip flops in AZ all week
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
But for real, be kind. Don’t litter. Use less plastic. Vote for candidates who keep the environment in mind so I can keep posting turtle vids before everything dies out.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
“my neck, my back, my jumpshot and my contract” - Ben reporting his injury to the staff
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
cannot wait to be safely in a stadium again having my heart broken in front of me
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
1 year
good morning
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
if @BenSimmons25 just tweeted, "..my bad" - I'd be all in.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
grateful for the @PhandemicThe and for the @Phillies of course
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
Can’t wait to have my Uber called by someone in these
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
went out to take photos tonight fully prepped: long pants, long sleeves, mask, hat, bug spray. got bit by a deer fly three times on my left thumb while taking this so you are required to like and appreciate this photo in solidarity.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
Is this my time to shamelessly self-promote? Here is my website where you can find upcoming comedy shows where I will be performing (objectively less funny than these turtles) and some of my photography (sometimes turtles)
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
Anyone want to go in on a billboard with me? Thinking around the Penn’s Landing area....
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
1 month
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
doing a test run on Twitter before this hits IG. @LZD325 made me do it.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
mirror is up, it finally has a purpose.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
@feministabulous I stopped him from buying my friend who was falling over drunk another drink.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
someday I’ll hang up this mirror. not today though.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
As I got dressed this morning, I thought about when a family member told me heavy people shouldn’t wear stripes while I was wearing a striped shirt. This heavy person likes stripes. Bring it bitch.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
I am so over this "I can't pronounce this person's name" conversation from announcers. Learn it. You had time to prep. It's not funny.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
it is I, comedian took viral video.😧
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
hey @36westbrook we met 13 years ago today. xoxo. love ya.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
1 year
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
9 years
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
good morning party people.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
7 months
go owls
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
best day of the year. #gophillies #RingTheBell
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
15+ yr old photo of the city and about 3 comments in before booing Santa is mentioned.
@cnnbrk
CNN Breaking News
4 years
The Philadelphia mayor's office says all large public events requiring city permits are canceled through February 2021
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
getting this tattooed across my lower back
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
no matter what happens today… it was a heck of a season to decide to make an OnlyFans with the handle “Go Birds Babe”
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
I am in mid-season form. 🍑👀
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
8 months
I love sports which is why I never listen to sports radio.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
don't you all say "I f-ing hate this place" like 4x a day?
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
getting this tattooed across my back
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
Lost a bunch of followers when I was saying words on here last night. Come back. I still look like this.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
@LaneJohnson65 @RealDGunnNBCS @LaneJohnson65 photo from one of your first days in Philly 💚
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
I am running for office.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
While you are all arguing with bots in these mentions, take a deep breath and check out some photos; maybe even buy some. Make sure you are shopping small this weekend.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
bloom city views
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
quick shoutout to my trainer. and genetics.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
currently on a date to the Phils game during a losing streak in 85 degree weather because I want him to see me at my absolute fucking worst.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
Is this now where I follow up and tell you to donate to a charity? Here is one for a very sad human with a tragic backstory etc etc .. Venmo: jamie-pappas
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
tonight’s playoff date xoxo
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
philadelph.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
welp...
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
wfh fits. ☀️ edition.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
first day phone snaps
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
My shadow looks like Danny Devito singing a ballad.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
my jacket is now perfect. @SixersFranklin pin secured. (Sorry @PhilaUnionPhang working on it)
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
watching this World Series like:
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
Halloween costume: sexy Doc Rivers
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
“best book I’ve read in my life” - me @mikerainey82
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
remember when JT got drilled in the face earlier....
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
🥴
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
5 years
*gets @kyliecosmetics *posts selfies no one asked for 💋
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
I thought we were keeping this a secret @RealDGunn @JOEL9ONE @GunnOnOne
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@GunnOnOne
Gunn On One with Derrick Gunn
4 years
Just a heads up, folks! We had to delay this week’s show til tomorrow because of scheduling. You’ll definitely enjoy our guest though 😎
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
little did we know…
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
at a show tonight. repping our guy.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
oh, another dinger?
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
another pro tip: enjoy your Friday night
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
work from home outfits are evolving.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
5 years
Men on dating apps: 1. First photo is a group photo? He’s the least attractive 2. Hats in every photo? Lebron James’ natural hair line 3. Dog/baby photos? Distraction from their face 4. Guys only take photos at weddings, cliché vacation spots, while fishing or car selfies
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
I have a first time meeting today with someone who refers to me as “Mr Jamie” in emails. This is the first time I am very excited about a gender reveal.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
I...am.. speechless
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
tomboy in the streets // lady who doesn’t want anyone near her clean sheets
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
hi NY. see you soon.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
Thought I’d bless your feeds with my face today since you got the rest yesterday
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
Glad to see Armie Hammer found a new job as a writer for the New York Times.
@nytimes
The New York Times
2 years
Cannibalism has a time and a place. Some recent books, films and shows suggest that the time is now. Can you stomach it?
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 months
just an absolute 10/10 day
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
I am once again asking the @WNBA to have a team in Philadelphia.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
3 years
It has been 432 days since I have attended a sporting event. Specifically, 584 days since I’ve been to CBP. The streak ends tonight. And I’m going to cry.
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
5 years
@feministabulous Realize or admit?
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
2 years
LFG
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@jamieamalea
jamie amalea pappas
4 years
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