Zoë Kristin @iamzoekristin Twitter profile | Pikagi

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Zoë Kristin

@iamzoekristin

1,276

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1,119

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NHS worker with lived experience +++ Working in forensic mental health Cat Mum🐈‍⬛️ Spiritual🌙 Alive 🤸‍♂️ @AsylumMagUK

England

Joined October 2021

Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

6 months

Those who have never been detained and confined with no idea when it will end, will never truly understand the effect that this has on you. I want to describe it but words won't ever come close. At the very least, it destroys something within your soul that you never get back.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

Do people not realise that autistic children will eventually grow up & become adults? Where are all the resources for adults?

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

When you have chronic unstable emotions, whether due to trauma or neurotype or mental illness, it can be so hard to trust your own perceptions of how healthy your relationships are. How much of it is me? How much of it is them? Am I overreacting? Am I being unreasonable?

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

'We can't stop you from committing suicide, if that's what you really want to do" is something we increasingly hear from mental health professionals in the NHS. In that case, why bother having crisis services? Aren't they meant to keep people ALIVE? 1/2

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

10 months

I have been homeless in psychiatric hospital. I have been homeless on people's sofas and floors. I have been homeless in emergency accommodation. I have been homeless in my car. None of it was a lifestyle choice.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

It amazes me that NHS mental health services & NHS autism services aren’t more joined up because many autistic people have mental health difficulties & many people with mental health difficulties could benefit from being offered autism assessments

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Latest NICE guidelines on self-harm: "Do not use aversive treatment, punitive approaches or criminal justice approaches such as community protection notices, criminal behaviour orders or prosecution for high service use as an intervention for frequent self-harm episodes."(1.7.5)

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

In 2017 I was sectioned by the police and in the process lost a jacket I loved. I've thought about it ever since. Last week I saw the same jacket on Vinted. I bought it for £2.60, it arrived this morning, I put it on and it's perfect and now it's like NONE OF THAT EVER HAPPENED

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

I am envious of people who can go to work and not get mentally ill

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

My Dad had bowel cancer during the pandemic. He got the all clear earlier this year. He’s 73 & today he completed the London Marathon & raised over £1k for @bowelcanceruk So proud of him!

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

11 months

Wow. This is a mental health message I can get behind, because it is truer than people realise. Watch it twice - the second time round it feels so very different...

@romankemp

Roman Kemp

11 months

This video from @NorwichCityFC is the best bit of Mental Health Awareness I’ve ever seen… watch until the end.

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Zoë Kristin

1 year

If you have a mental health issue that can be easily solved and they can get you back to normal again, services are happy to help. Quick wins! But if you're chronically mentally ill or you're neurodivergent & struggling, you're neglected and excluded as a lost cause.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Why bother having mental health services at all? Why bother with the Mental Health Act? Or with suicide prevention strategies? Why tell people to 'just ask for help' when this is the response they will eventually get? 2/2

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

9 months

I now have a start date for my new job: next Weds. Its 3 days a wk because work has made me suicidal from autistic burnout in the past. I'm choosing to work after 10 yrs (!!) of illness/recovery because I finally feel ready. But disabled people should never be pushed into work.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

I find it so hard to find people who understand when I say ‘just existing is incredibly painful’. I don’t mean I’m suicidal, I don’t mean I’m depressed. I mean that this reality & existing here in it is jarring to every cell of my being. All the time.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

What people with a 'personality disorder' diagnosis experience is far bigger than stigma: it is blatant discrimination, and it is multiple levels of abuse from the very services meant to care for us - institutional abuse, verbal, emotional, gaslighting, neglect. All of it.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

It also makes you a lot more susceptible to gaslighting because your perception of reality is already shakey. You feel gaslit by your own mind half the time let alone trying to figure out if someone else is feeding into it too.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

I wrote a short piece for the latest issue of @AsylumMagUK about my experiences of the BPD label and criminalisation. You can read it as a free sample on their website here:

Too Much by Zoë Kristin - Asylum Magazine

The hospital doctor smirked as he changed my diagnosis from bipolar to borderline personality disorder – BPD. And with that, the validity of my madness was gone. My fiery outward display of...

asylummagazine.org

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@Theholisticpsyc This definitely applies to me. My parents were never fighting physically, but there was open hostility, dysfunctionality, conflict, passive aggressiveness, & emotional/angry outbursts that were traumatic to be around. I don’t blame them now, but that is how it was.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

9 months

I confided in a nurse colleague at work today & told her I was autistic & didn't know how to approach management to tell them. It couldn't have gone better. She was amazing. She is going to support me with speaking to management & offered a 121 chat any time I need it 1/2

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Zoë Kristin

11 months

Does anyone else find media and social media just painful sometimes? The weight of all the problems in the world, all the people crying out in pain, all the nasty opinions, people arguing ... it hurts, it's distressing. I don't know if it's an autistic thing or not.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@aclientfirst I had a therapist arrive in 6 inch heels & a zebra catsuit, 10 mins late to our appointment, clutching a Starbucks takeout that she drank throughout, and then excused herself to pee halfway through our session. I didn't return but I guess that was about me...

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

My experience of being around people – as an autistic person who has masked most of my life – is essentially me pretending to be amiable & cheerful whilst every cell in my body & brain is repeatedly, endlessly screaming

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

9 months

Access to Work are allowing me some sessions with a neurodivergent coach to help me stay in work. Which is so cool! They said I can research online and find one myself if I like. If anyone has any recommendations, do let me know!

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Zoë Kristin

9 months

The fear of 'coming out' as autistic and in need of adjustments at work is REAL

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

7 months

Woe betide you if you Fail to engage or Over-engage with MH services Make sure you get the amount of engagement just right guys

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

10 months

I'm becoming more & more convinced I have ADHD as well as being autistic. When I gave my reasonable adjustments to the occupational health nurse, she even said it sounded like it. My brother has it. I have lots of the signs. But getting diagnosed is such a minefield...

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

7 months

@Shrink_at_Large This is not appropriate. Those conversations should be confidential, not media circus fodder.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

Getting paid for being my mental, autistic self, where I can talk about being mentally ill, sectioned and arrested and no one blinks an eyelid but instead nods with understanding and compassion is incredibly validating and empowering.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

10 months

Last month my GP sent me to hospital due to severe abdominal pain. On the paperwork she gave me to give them, it listed autism, EUPD & Bipolar disorder. The staff at the hospital never mentioned any of them, & how were they relevant to my stomach pain?

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

When you can feel yourself becoming a little unravelled but know there’s zero point going to your GP or any kind of MH service…

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

9 months

My first few days back in work this week (after 10 years of mental illness/recovery) went really well. There were moments of internal panic on my first day, where escape went through my mind! But from my 2nd day it felt much better & I'm looking forward to tomorrow now 😊

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

11 months

Not news to so many of us. CW SH, suicide & harm by services

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Mental health patient says NHS care has done her more damage than repair

Nicola Brokenshire says she has been in and out of inpatient care with autism and resulting mental health problems for around 10 years

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

@Death_Bow @Madiii03 I’m sorry to hear this. I am an autistic adult who has struggled for years and there is very little to no support

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

Left mental health services

@_Pammy_DS_

𝙋𝙖𝙢𝙢𝙮 ✨️

1 year

whats the best thing you’ve ever done that massively improved your mental health?

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

"Everyone who uses healthcare services should be treated with compassion, respect and dignity. For people who have self‑harmed, however, staff attitudes are often reported as contributing to poor experiences of care." 1/2

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

There are some people concerned about me because of this tweet. Just to confirm, I personally am not suicidal or currently experiencing this situation. I have had this many times in the past & continue to see people in this position constantly. I am fine, thank you for caring!

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

@nuwandiss I’m interested & glad to hear you - a professional - saying that. Patients with the dx get pretty exhausted dealing with the prejudice from clinicians too. Imagine having years upon years of it… in addition to experiencing the symptoms. It’s horrendous.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

There should always be an alternative to telephone contact with all services, businesses, everything. People with disabilities, mental health conditions, different neurotypes etc can find telephones incredibly difficult or inaccessible, sometimes to a life-limiting degree

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

10 months

I appear to have got my autistic self a job!! As an administrator in the public sector (being intentionally vague at this point 😁) Eek! Scared & excited...!! In the past, work has always broken me, but I'm determined not to let it happen this time.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@RachaelMole @_kasthomas @scope And this is a great example why benefits such as PIP should not be means tested. Disabled people who work should not be penalised or 'taxed' for being disabled.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

7 months

6 years ago on a Sat night I'd be paranoid & drunk, walking in roads, taking too many meds, getting 136ed or arrested. Today I'm tucked up in my flat w my love & 3 cats & I have a job & life is better than its ever been. Don't wanna ever go back.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

I used to think I had social anxiety but since meeting more neurodivergent people, I've realised it was being around neurotypicals that gave me anxiety

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

My best friend called today saying she’d heard on the car radio about people having terrible experiences on psych wards & being traumatised afterwards. She realised she had no idea what it had been like for me. I told her it was the first time anyone had ever asked.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@EleanorSegall @megs_is_living They’re mental health staff answering a crisis line. It’s their job to know what to say.

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Zoë Kristin

1 year

People are being increasingly pushed to crisis because it is so difficult to get timely access to NHS mental health care. And community services provide the bare minimum even when you do get to see them.

@nuwandiss

Nuwan Dissanayaka

1 year

What does this story tell us?

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

@mud_the_kid This whole thread needs a TW... There's so many. Just picking one. TW: SH (sarcastic nurse after seeing my yrs-old scars) "If you really want to k*** yourself, why don't you try cutting this direction instead" (as she's showing me on my arm). I said nothing, I was so shocked.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@davidhencke I feel uncomfortable with the amount of personal info about her that has been shared here. I’m just imagining if that was me. If a vulnerable person is funnelled into the CJ system, does that make it open season for sharing such painful things about their history/health?

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Been reading my psych record all day. 6500+ pages & still 1600 to go. I’m far enough out of services now (6 yrs) for it not to upset me, but I do feel very sad for the younger me. I behaved badly at times but I was treated badly too. I’m so glad those days are behind me.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

When you’re autistic & exhausted, it’s amazing how quickly psychotic symptoms come knocking.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

9 months

I cried with the emotion of it & feeling a little dysregulated but it's a huge weight off my mind. Huge. Off tomorrow so got a day to relax before going back in Weds. Thanks for listening Twitter friends 😘 2/2

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

@mamasimmerplays Really interesting points & I completely agree

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

@ScottJamesElder Simply a kind patient person using supportive language, instead of dismissing & shaming people when they ask for help is the key. It really is that simple & would make a huge difference.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

10 months

An article I wrote in the Spring issue of @AsylumMagUK this year... I've got a second one coming out in this next Winter issue, available soon. In the meantime, here's this one 👇

@AsylumMagUK

Asylum Magazine

10 months

"The hospital doctor smirked as he changed my diagnosis from bipolar to borderline personality disorder – BPD. And with that, the validity of my madness was gone." Too Much by @iamzoekristin #MentalInkness

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Zoë Kristin

1 year

I can't believe it. This is so sad. We've followed each other on here for some time. Her last few tweets say so much. I'm so sorry, friend. Another of us lost.

@wijsgerig

Wijsgeer truth speaker

1 year

TW SUICIDE Sad news about one of us. I am very sorry that I've just gotten to hear that @TraumaPhDandMe has taken her own life I am very sad

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

“Frequent attendance at A&E for compassion or emotional reward”??!! Not only does that show me there is gross misunderstanding of what people ‘want’ when they present to A&E in distress, but also… when has there been any compassion & emotional reward to be found there? 🤷

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@RobAKemp1966 I am not a fan of the police however they have always acted to ensure my safety in this respect 100% - they don't seem to have the same laissez-faire attitude that crisis services so often do

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@MsMaryB @ItsEmilyKaty I’m in the process of getting an autism assessment even though I’m 42 & people might think why bother, but nothing sums up why I want to better than this thing about zebras!! When I was small my grandad wrote a poem to me starting ‘Zoë was a zebra’. Maybe he was right after all

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@inihelene Yrs ago. Had 1 date. Happened to mention I worked for homelessness charity in nearby city. I declined another date. Next day, work say he's called over & over asking for me. He proceeds to spam my work with calls, threatening to come down there & get me. I had to call the police

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

10 months

What is the point in a hospital asking for & recording your accessibility needs in a pre-appointment online check-in, when the clinicians who you see ignore them? Out of 4 visits, 0 healthcare profs have acknowledged or asked about my specific needs during an appointment.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@julieruble @aclientfirst It just added to the bizarre experience - the whole thing was so surreal. I guess I prefer my therapist to look professional so I feel they're taking me seriously. I mean, I'm all for funky clothes, but it was raunchy club wear. It was clearly all about her.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Every morning I make coffee & sit back in bed to drink it & Alfie will jump up & sleep on my lap. Every day without fail. I call it our morning cuddle & the routine of it & the warmth & heaviness of him are both so soothing & reassuring. Animals are medicine for the soul.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

10 months

It feels embarrassing, much more than my list of physical health issues. And I prefer to disclose my autism when I choose to. It"s not like they use the info to provide extra help or adjustments etc. If anything, it leads to judgements being made

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

"Punitive or judgemental staff attitudes can be distressing for people who have self‑harmed and may lead to further self‑harm or avoidance of medical attention." 2/2

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

Just because some psychosis is transient doesn’t mean it isn’t terrifying

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

It is so important to watch this.

@GeorgeMonbiot

George Monbiot

2 years

You don't protest, so you think the Public Order Bill - the most repressive legislation of the modern era - doesn't affect you? If so, I'm sorry to say that you couldn't be more wrong. *Please* watch this. You need to know.

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

@GillGirlMum I had an asthma attack earlier this year. Doctor asked me: ‘are you sure you’re not just having a panic attack’. I’ve had asthma since I was a child, I reckon I know the difference by now.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

People with certain MH diagnoses, such as BPD, are increasingly prosecuted for 'antisocial' suicidal or distressed behaviour because they are deemed (controversially) to have capacity & so MHA not appropriate. We can't have autistic people going this way too.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

He is 12 tomorrow 😍

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

@shaker47 Whilst it isn't mandatory to follow NICE guidelines, they will now be going AGAINST the guidelines, not a good look. NICE guidelines sometimes require infrastructure changes that take time to accomplish but the direction should really now be away from SIM, no excuses. #StopSIM

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@ChloeSApter I went to A&E with Lithium toxicity. I was told to do so by care team as I had the symptoms. One of the nurses came in & said ‘so, you’re the overdose’ & was abrupt & discompassionate. I said ‘I didn’t OD, my Lithium levels were too high’ but they still treated me badly

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

@Autistic_Cherry I need & crave instructions & rules but I don’t like to be told what to do! I feel there is a difference

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

1 year

@__sp00kytherook @h_dgz My local autism charity concentrates solely on children, just as an example. It would be wonderful if they could include adults too.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

I support all of the strikes. I support any form of resistance in this country right now.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

PTSD is not being able to hear a car door being slammed shut outside the house without thinking ‘they’re here for me’ & feeling scared. 5 years crisis-free but these things are so deeply ingrained. (I’m fine btw: just an observation)

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Zoë Kristin

1 year

@EleniTWehner Yes, exactly! It doesn’t make sense.

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Zoë Kristin

1 year

Since discovering I’m autistic, I find myself being increasingly avoidant, even mistrusting, of neurotypicals. I’m wary of them because they so often cause me pain. But it’s not an ideal situation, because they’re everywhere. I’m becoming even less functional IRL. It’s not good.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@AutieBrainDump @autisticbutter1 I’ve been wondering this too. In my 20s I partied & went clubbing. Now in my 40s, just the sound of the TV is too much.

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

@drjanaway Her work is generally more about her own ego & agendas than anything else

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Just because you have psychotic states that are transient and happen under stress doesn’t mean that they aren’t highly distressing & damaging. You still lose your grip on reality & that is petrifying. Psychosis in ‘BPD’ is no joke, even if they like to call it ‘pseudo-psychosis’

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

8 months

Being autistic at work has been going well last few weeks but today I had to get out the office for a walk & have a proper cry. I'm covering for someone on leave & feeling overwhelmed. Everyone is kind & supportive, but my brain still implodes under pressure 🤯

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

Changing the definition of 'mental disorder' in the Mental Health Act to longer include autism, as recommended in the Draft Mental Health Bill, will in many ways be progress, though I worry about it leading instead to criminalisation & imprisonment of autistic people.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Acute & desperate human distress is increasingly being dismissed as unacceptable, antisocial & illegal. This is happening more & more. How is a criminal record on top of it all going to help? STOP PROSECUTING & CRIMINALISING SUICIDAL PEOPLE.

@SurvivorsNotPD

Survivors against PD #StopSIM #StopOxevision

@SurvivorsNotPD

2 years

Woman rescued from A40 bridge while in mental health crisis is prosecuted #stopSIM

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

@lydianaomii @RITB_ "no mh professionals discriminate or treat people with pd's differently" - this is blatant gaslighting

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

So excited to be getting my piece published in the Spring issue of @AsylumMagUK !!

@AsylumMagUK

Asylum Magazine

2 years

Spring issue of Asylum is going off to the printers. Don't forget your subscription Contributions by @iamzoekristin @jaunty_aphorism @awaisaftab @maddoggie2 @JanineBooth @CHARMManchester @waiting_he @INQUEST_ORG @DollyDollysen @RealityTourists @tareen_jane @mud_the_kid etc

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Zoë Kristin

1 year

I have a colonoscopy tomorrow & my god the bowel prep drink is the most horrendous thing ive ever put into my body

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Zoë Kristin

1 year

As someone who has been criminalised for my mental distress, I know how damaging & traumatising schemes such as SIM are. Professionals! I'm calling on you to please sign this open letter & show solidarity with the #StopSIM coalition. This is so important. #StopSIMallies

@mental_activist

Ezra (they/them) #StopSIM

@mental_activist

1 year

Colleagues & comrades, our #StopSIMallies open letter in support and solidarity with the #StopSIM coalition is now live. Sign here to call on NHS England to show accountability, transparency & respect by publishing the joint #StopSIM policy:

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Zoë Kristin

2 years

Happy that the issue of Asylum Magazine came through my door this morning! Lots of great art & writing. @AsylumMagUK Particularly powerful piece by Wren in there 💜 @jaunty_aphorism

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

I got sent an Autism Passport to fill in & it says to carry it with me. From local UK charity. I’m new to this: how often do these things actually get used/asked for?

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Having a slight identity & creative crisis as I've been writing/blogging about living with PD but since discovering I'm unmistakably autistic it all seems a bit redundant and is also making me feel quite angry that I was made to think that way about myself all that time

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

11 months

"It's OK not to be OK" as long as you don't stay not-OK for too long, or even worse, go from OK to not-OK and back too frequently and too intensely.

@InchOrInfinity

L 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

@InchOrInfinity

11 months

"It's OK not to be OK" until you say something icky no eww we don't like that

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@Invisshadows86 It means don’t criminalise people who present to services in crisis often, or use things like SIM schemes.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

I have such an overwhelming week ahead I feel close to paralysed just from the thought of it. The sort of week that would be nothing to most but is enough to make me feel ill. My cat is unwell & I think that is making me extra anxious about everything 😢

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@adamfare1996 I once had a nurse take my blood & no word of a lie, she said “tiny prick” just before she stuck me. I had to hold my mouth with my other hand to stop myself from proper cracking up 🤭

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Published 07.09.22

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

@n_y__l_a Yeah, seems pretty criminal to me. Interesting that it is now, as of last month, in NICE guidelines they should NOT be doing this.

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Today I learned that NHS mental health services records are kept for 20 years from the date you were last seen

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

I opened my back door just now and there was a hedgehog on the back step!

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@iamzoekristin

Zoë Kristin

2 years

Filling an online form out for my initial assessment for autism. It asks if I am 'well-co-ordinated'. What the hell does that mean? Does it mean mentally? Physically? In terms of what I wear? How I think? Arggg. It's so hard to understand what they mean & I have to tick a box.

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