natalayhehoo @highprobably1 Twitter profile

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

I will “baby girl” a 6’2” man, idgaf

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 months

I’m roasting garlic in the oven. My 13 year old thinks it smells like weed. I can relax now, confident that my youngest child has never smoked weed.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 years

Out of an emotionally/mentally abusive relationship with an narcissist after 15 years 🙌🏻

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 months

Oh look, it’s my coping mechanisms

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 months

If I have to switch from the heat to the ac one more time this week, I’m pretty sure it’s going to open a portal to another dimension.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 months

@DemocracyDfendr At least she’s not smoking shit then

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 years

In my defense, they weren’t called ‘tramp stamps’ when I got one

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Just heard someone asking for directions in a gas station like our forefathers

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

I’m not moving from this spot and you can’t make me

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

My ex told me it was inappropriate for me to wear shorts after I turned 39. I wear the shortest ones I can find now 💅🏻

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

I’m not moving from this couch until it’s time to go to bed

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’m pretty gangsta for a white woman in my 40s

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Just once, when a man asks me what I like to do for fun, I’m going to respond “masturbate”.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

My gag reflex is on point

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’m too pretty to be this single

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

“Divorce sucks”, yeah, but you know what DOESN’T suck? Doing everything on your own when he said there was no way in hell you could.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Dudes in my dms saying I’m “stunning” and “gorgeous”. Dudes in real life say, “excuse me, ma’am, you’re blocking the way to all the cheese.”

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Selfie Sunday because I can

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

All these peeps not believing I’m over 40 have me pretty happy on this rainy Sunday 😂😘

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

6 months

Reasons I can’t sleep at night this week: I have arms - seriously where do they go comfortably? My brain won’t stop thinking “Butthole Surfers is the craziest band name ever” I said something mildly embarrassing 19 years, 4 months, and 6 hours ago

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Had to clean up and do shit today - time to chill now

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

A man on the internet thinks my tattoos distract from my beauty. However shall I recover from this blow?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’m a sucker for a pretty dick

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Why do people say “dream job”? My dream is literally to not have to have a job.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

What is everyone wearing for WW3?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I think I’m gonna drink beer and chill

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

“I have something to tell you later”. No, no you do not. You have something to tell me right now or my anxiety will take us both out.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’ll wear your hoodie without a top on underneath, idgaf

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’d friendzone you but I don’t like you as a friend either.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Y’all… I have a confession. I think bacon is overrated.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 years

I followed you for that one good tweet

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Had a man tell me to go northeast like I know what that means

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Being single in your 40s is wild. I’m impressed by a full head of hair.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Sorry I told you the wrong way to Pound Town. I’m terrible with directions.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Sorry. I bite when I get excited

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Gimme my man card- I just ratchet strapped a load in the truck and said, “well, that’s not going anywhere.”

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

My tits identify as your pillow

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

This dress has pockets 💁🏼‍♀️ so selfie, it’s science

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Been getting a lot of “do you like bbc?” comments lately, and honestly, what’s not to like about the British Broadcasting Corporation?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

You think your ho’ing days are over, then bam! You get divorced in your 40s.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Friday night in my pajamas before 9pm- such a rebel

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Tuesday night no pants is a thing, right guys?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’m going to suck your soul out of your peehole

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

He thinks I’m sweet. Boy, is he gonna be surprised

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Got eye fucked by my waiter tonight. That’s the most action I’ve had in months

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Sometimes when I need a little extra help, I look at my divorce papers when I masturbate

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

*boops your morning wood with my ass*

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Sunday Funday? Football and laundry day

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Him: what that mouth do? Me: probably make you cry

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Eat me like the peach I am

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Is it too much to ask to have some war drums playing in the background when I get pissed?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Is it too much to ask for a 200lb+ man to pin me down on the bed?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

I just accidentally liked a tweet with my tit

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Apparently I don’t tweet enough selfies? 😂 Happy weekend!

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’m not sure it’s healthy to be this horny all the time.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I can never be a cougar because I like older men

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Fuck it. I’m getting drunk

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I solemnly swear I am up to no good

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Are you gonna make me cum or what?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Sunny Sundays are the best

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

It’s a blast Deftones on my lunch break kinda day

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I get it, guys. I follow back funny, pretty girls too.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Twitter is like the cool table in the prison cafeteria

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

A man who knows how to kiss is fucking dangerous

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

You look sketchy. Followed.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

“I think about you all the time”, is manspeak for “I jerk off to you”. Don’t fall for it, girls.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

The dads at this trampoline park have figured out I’m unattached and have sent forth a contender.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

7 months

I annihilated my 20 year old son at Mortal Kombat and Tekken. Therefore a healthy dynamic has reemerged in my household.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Don’t fuck with me. I’ll soak your cast iron pan.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 months

@SeedyROM 😂 well shit

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Let me save you the trouble of dm’ing me: 1. I don’t want to fuck you 2. I don’t want to see your dick Good talk

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Welcome to your 40s: you pull a muscle while masturbating now.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’d tweet my ass but I can’t have anyone else fall in love with me right now.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’ve come to the realization that men think every app is a dating app.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’m fucked up but at least I’m adorable about it.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

My tits are too nice to be single

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Older men at the office are obligated to say “here comes, trouble”, every time they see me

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

You’re cute. Let me sit on your face.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

My pussy is much nicer than I am

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I’m tiny, put off an insane amount of body heat, and I’m terrible for you. I’m basically a hot pocket.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I don’t “make friends”. I get adopted by extroverts and they make me do things.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Name something better than soft and slow kissing… I’ll wait

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I got hit on by a 24 year old guy and I don’t know if I feel flattered or I want to put him in timeout

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Welcome to your 40s. You’re either hungry or horny- and it’s probably both.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Fellas, the eye contact directly to checking out the tits is not as slick as you think it is.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Imagine falling in love with someone and then finding out that Red Hot Chili Peppers are their favorite band

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Apparently it’s National Selfie Day

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Nice to meet you, I’m the family disappointment

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

It’s not my fault I’m attracted to men who look like lumberjacks or crab boat fishermen

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Southern girl sext

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

I live in Kentucky and just heard “sushi” pronounced in 6 fucking syllables.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Just watched a dude walk into a brick pillar because he was staring at my tits

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

Rocking a Tool shirt AND a flannel today like the 90s girl I still am

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

C’mere and lemme squish that dad bod

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Halfway through this week

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

1 year

Every fucking man that has ever been interested in me has messaged me this week, so what the fuck is up with the zodiac?

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

3 years

I have a 3 pound dog and a 130 pound dog. If that doesn’t explain my decision making skills I don’t know what will.

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

It’s Friday, bitches 🙌🏻

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

I don’t trust anyone born after the 80s… and y’all in the 87-89 range are still pretty sketchy

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

It’s too hot to keep my legs together

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natalayhehoo

@highprobably1

2 years

My soul mate is probably on a different continent. Most likely India if my message requests are any indication.

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