Sir Frank Marcois @frankmarcois Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@galery_basah10

@ACEswallows

@MastCellAction

@Kmonpro

@PlaydogeGameDev

@Beamesderf75730

@titia_k

@imronvandermeer

@truckgirl32606

@saadalthoraya

@defifarmeralex

@plutomisfits

@somureddy09

@seo_pport

@The_Blue_Mark

@jandakembangstw

@sadendya

@kurooxyuroo

@ContraMolinism

@BinorRaja

@MsKonoXo

@CountryBearLive

@TakhliqKhan

@ulvetannahq

@KonkonVtube

@reddi41_

@momblack4

@PuntoENARM

@rob_ritchie2

@murakucofficiel

@chennaicorp

@checklv7

@taculea18al14t

@LMRiouxSoucy

@Streaming

@tararichards511

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Boris has called an emergency COBRA meeting to discuss the Indian variant. Now that he’s successfully got it into the country, there are loads of new contracts to dish out.

111

2K

7K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

Remember, it’s patriotic to be cold and hungry. The colder and hungrier you are, the more proud you can be to be British! 🇬🇧

138

1K

5K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Awkward Cobra breakfast meeting. Boris opened it by asking if anyone had snow last night. Gove started sweating.

75

722

5K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Late Cobra meeting last night. We couldn’t order in for pizza so had pot noodles. You should have seen Dido Harding’s face when the hot water was added. Mind. Blown.

81

600

4K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Great performance by Boris. I think we can draw a line under it now and get on with delivering Covid and the fastest Brexit in the G7.

688

403

3K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Boris has called an emergency COBRA meeting to discuss this new Omnicron variant. We need to mobilise quickly as there are unexpected contracts to hand out. Christmas has come early!

60

945

3K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

I created this account during the pandemic as I was bored. It was fun and I think it made a few people laugh (I’m not Mark Francois). Since Musk bought Twitter to ensure that free speech only benefitted the hard right it’s become less fun. Give me a 👋 if you love democracy.

611

203

3K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I received this heartwarming email from a constituent: “Just to let you know that, thanks to Brexit, we have sold our 3 bed villa in Spain and bought a 2 bed flat in Rayleigh. We can’t believe this has happened.” Welcome home patriots! 🇬🇧

113

401

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Crowdfunding for Boris's wedding. If there's any money left over I'll set it aside for the next one.

50

379

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

COBRA meeting today. Chartwell are sponsoring the catering.

126

303

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Liz Truss got in touch with me as she wanted some advice on how to deal with India in trade negotiations. We’re going to watch Carry On Up The Khyber on Sunday afternoon.

75

285

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Why are people tweeting #NeverVoteConservative ?

648

829

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Boris has called an emergency COBRA meeting to discuss ministers using their government positions for personal financial gain. It’s actually going to be more of a brainstorming session than a meeting.

83

483

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Just setting off for Jersey with some of the lads. When my country calls I say “how high?”.

139

310

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Just had my 3rd vaccine jab.

150

106

2K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Just heading over to Mike’s. He’s split up with the missus and said things are hard so he needs a mate to give him a hand.

93

129

1K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

Delighted to see my good friend Andy is featured in the Sunday papers. There’s a face that represents everything that is great about our wonderful Party.

208

227

1K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I can’t be bothered to be an MP today so I’ll be ignoring all constituent correspondence and will be focussing on new ways to financially exploit the pandemic instead.

48

272

1K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Delighted to announce that my first hotel, Marcois Mansions Heathrow, will be opening next week. Some said it was a risky time to enter the hospitality business but risk doesn’t scare me, I was a soldier.

80

179

1K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Spent the weekend dealing with a constituent who has had to move back to Essex after 12 years in Spain. I'm buying his house in Alicante.

46

114

1K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Boris is too hungover to attend the COBRA meeting this morning. He’s asked Laura Kuenssberg to chair it. Peston is seething.

10

160

1K

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Disappointing breakfast at MaccyD’s. I had a McBread Sandwich and a glass of McTapwater. They super sized the McTapwater when I showed them my picture of Ian Botham’s knob.

22

150

991

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Just applied to be on Dragon’s Den. I’ll be asking for £250million for a 5% share in my business selling VIP government contracts.

20

147

990

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Just taken Bill Cash up the Star Chamber.

158

102

906

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Text from Andrew Bridgen: “Is Brazil in the EU?”

56

113

861

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I had my fourth jab yesterday and now my right testicle looks like James Melville. My left one looks like Toby Young so no change there.

33

91

777

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Boris cancelled today’s COBRA meeting as he’s busy interviewing potential Trade Envoys.

67

233

780

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Text from Chief Whip: “You use Twitter, are you seeing the #TorySleaze hashtag? I’ve texted everyone and asked them to shutdown any mention of #TorySleaze . The public adore you, convince them that there is no #TorySleaze . The last thing we need is a #TorySleaze scandal.”

59

438

782

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

For the record, I shall not be writing to the 1922 Committee for the following reasons: 1) I don't know what it is 2) I can't be arsed 3) I'm not real I hope that makes my position clear.

54

49

757

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Rumours about food shortages are FALSE! I went to my local Tesco earlier today and there was plenty of fresh produce!

111

82

725

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Cheeky foreign mare, Ursula von der Leyen, said “the Brexit agreement was written in English so they could understand it". Well the joke’s on her as we didn’t understand it! 🇬🇧

35

187

710

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Please feel free to tell anyone upset by the original tweet that it’s a parody account. If the tweet has pissed them off then we are on the same side.

46

25

727

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Meeting two of my old army buddies for lunch. We like to get together at least twice a year to reminisce about our time in the forces. We saw things in Llandudno that created a bond no one will ever break.

61

82

706

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I'm going clothes shopping with Therese Coffey today.

145

63

685

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

I’ve sacked my PA. I was fond of her but she acted unprofessionally. She arranged for my team to visit an art gallery as a team treat. At no point did she tell me that Camilla from accounts went to a state school and wasn’t qualified to visit a gallery. Dom found out and flipped.

15

92

696

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I finally located my missing underpants.

53

88

671

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

I’ve been invited to referee the GBEEBIES’ Mourn Off. Dan and Darren are both grieving like no one else has ever grieved before. It’s a privilege to be asked to oversee and decide which one of them is the most patriotic.

39

63

631

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Splendid picture of Councillor Joe digging the trenches on the front line.

45

79

605

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

Boris is admired from Kiev to Karlisle but most people from Kardiff to Kilmarnock think he’s a kant.

17

89

622

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Text from Gavin Williamson: "You said Ben Shephard presented GMB on Thursdays". Gotcha Gav.

18

84

583

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

A warm welcome to my new follower. I don’t think he’s going to like Sir Frank.

61

30

579

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

As promised, here is the front cover of the 2nd edition of my autobiography - AN ARMY OF ONE

43

130

572

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Terrible evening. Popped into the chippy. Foreign sounding chap (white but greeted us with something that sounded like “alryt”) took tremendous umbrage when I ordered “Build Back Batter”. He called me a Tory bastard and asked me to leave the premises. I don’t much like Manchester

32

63

566

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

A constituent got in touch as he’s worried about this cladding issue. I told him not to worry, none of my investment properties are affected by it. God bless him.

13

89

569

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Delighted to announce that the landlord of The Raven pub in Bath has joined GB News as its food and drink correspondent. He will mostly be visiting Wetherspoons establishments. Obviously I’d love to take him up The Albion.

23

94

549

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Boris completely flipped at the COBRA breakfast meeting this morning. He was ranting about how he should have just got everything from Ikea. Liz Truss is currently trying to contact their trade envoy.

11

94

539

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

COBRA breakfast meeting. Told Andrew Bridgen it was St Pancake who chased the snakes out of Ireland. He’s now explaining to Nadine Dorries the methods that St Pancake used.

18

95

535

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I took this young patriot up The Albion this afternoon. He loved it.

91

37

494

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Blocking everyone who has tweeted #BorisJohnsonIsAliar

355

218

504

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Just off to Heathrow to pick up my South African au pair. Obviously the two week quarantine rule will be respected. It’s been a while since I stayed at Claridge’s. I hope she likes it.

39

68

501

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Check out the Mail On Sunday tomorrow for the big story about my affair with Boris Johnson. He showered me with avalanches of love.

49

74

501

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Very proud to announce the release of my new album - NATIONAL HERO

43

114

483

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Looking forward to the COBRA meeting this afternoon. Laura K is announcing the local election results.

8

85

496

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Boris has called an emergency COBRA meeting. He wants an update on who’s shagging who.

35

74

479

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

I’m back. Fighting fit and raring to go.

293

30

453

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

They died in the Channel, “French waters”, because they were desperate. A terrifying, life threatening journey to a hostile country was a better choice than staying where they were. No one chooses where they’re born. You didn’t choose where you were born. You are lucky.

12

57

471

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Text from Gavin Williamson: "When are schools re-opening?"

18

60

471

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Text from John Redwood: “Looks like there may be a gap in the smoked salmon market soon”.

24

68

448

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

We need to bin #Eurovision and launch UKvision. England would win that.

113

41

435

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Splendid news. Big Dog has invited about 50 of his staff to Chequers for Sunday lunch. He said he wants to do some team building and get our stories straight.

17

63

432

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I’m fed up with all this criticism of Dom for not making a phone call. Can you people honestly say there’s never been a time when you just couldn’t be arsed to do something? That’s all it was. Dom couldn’t be arsed. We’ve all been there.

19

53

410

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Delighted to be on Covid Marshal duty today.

32

63

395

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

I’d like to take this opportunity to quash the ridiculous, unpatriotic suggestions that Prue Leith had both her vaccine jabs in a 3 week period because she’s wealthy and famous. Poppycock. Auntie Prue was fast tracked because her son is a Conservative MP.

9

103

406

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I’ve seen a lot of criticism of Tory MPs who supposedly only visited food banks for the photo opportunity and left ASAP. I would like to put it on record that I did NOT visit our local food bank as a PR exercise. I went to get some free food.

14

35

376

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

A very intense COBRA meeting this afternoon. I’m not going to lie to you, I’m absolutely smashed and I’ve got brie all over my bow tie.

8

44

379

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Text from Lee Hurst: “Is your Twitter working?”

10

36

372

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

Meeting Boris for a work breakfast. We’ll be absolutely smashed by 9.30am. I love Tuesdays.

6

37

365

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Wilf and I are having a splendid time at Peppa Pig World but I’ve no idea how Boris managed to get so pissed when he was here yesterday.

9

53

347

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

Absolutely delighted. My mortgage has been approved! Work starts on the Tree House first thing tomorrow.

6

11

348

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I had an email from a constituent who is worried about the National Insurance increase. I’ve reassured him that, as my main income is from property, it doesn't really impact me. It's lovely that they care so much.

6

78

338

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Wasted overnight trip in full combat gear to the Irish border.

30

42

331

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Delighted to see Therese Coffey looking so sprightly on TV this morning. Colin and I took her up The Albion last night and we both feel pretty grotty this morning.

42

28

322

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

We smashed it Matt! The stupid plebs voted for us despite everything we’ve done to them. We can literally do whatever the fuck we want and they’ll still vote for us. We’re going to make a fortune!

10

87

324

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

Big Dog has just told us that we can’t wank off OR grope anyone in the Commons anymore. This woke leftie stuff is getting out of control.

11

50

325

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Massive party at The Prittster’s house tonight. Chips, dips, chains and whips.

21

38

304

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Delightful morning at the beach. Unfortunately the sea was closed so I couldn’t go paddle boarding. I made some phone calls instead.

9

33

316

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I'm exhausted. I was up at 2am and 4am to sing God Save The Queen with Nadine and Andrew. The first effort was a bit awkward as Nadine started singing Bohemian Rhapsody.

16

41

310

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Boris called an emergency COBRA meeting this morning. The entire team agreed to invest in his brother’s new business, VacPass.

9

94

320

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Text from Tim M: “Where are the bloody foreigners? Who’s going to collect glasses and shampoo the carpets in my pubs? Can we get some Indians to do it?”

28

41

310

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Delighted to be the first to congratulate Baroness Gray on her peerage.

8

38

318

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Delighted to have secured two tickets for Nigel Farage’s comeback tour. Nige tells me that the tickets are selling like bags of coke at a Tory party conference.

26

50

308

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Going to a leaving party every night next week. 👍🏼

14

28

304

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

It’s wine o’clock! 🍷 #WineFriday #10DSparty

50

41

304

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

8 months

Shaun’s right. If women want to be taken seriously in the political sphere they should be experienced like Charlotte Owen or demure like Michelle Mone. #SexistShaun

8

65

295

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

A constituent wrote to me and expressed his dismay at the fact that England is not welcoming Ukrainian refugees. I reminded her that we had the fastest GDP in Brexit and our vaccine rollout was increasing at 5% per Europe!

16

30

281

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

A warm welcome to my newest follower. I fear she may end up disappointed.

47

5

288

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

This morning I held a surgery for constituents who are struggling with exports to the EU because of Brexit red tape. It was a very worthwhile exercise. I got 36 half price pork sausages and 12 litres of cider for a tenner.

17

39

276

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Just off out for breakfast with my financial adviser. He says he’s got some good news and some bad news.

23

46

271

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

I have many contacts in Russia (I served during Cold War One). They reliably inform me that Putin is absolutely shitting it at the prospect of going head to head with Liz Truss.

11

22

278

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

We’re back with our new single “Money, Money, Money”!

15

43

271

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Really looking forward to the post PMQs COBRA meeting. Mattie H says he’s got a mate in the drinks trade who can provide the booze at cost price.

17

41

266

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Sajid and Rishi sat next to each other at the COBRA meeting this afternoon. Gav looked really confused.

12

43

263

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

To be clear, Big Dog didn’t smirk because the interviewer mentioned death threats to the leader of the lefties. I’ve spoken to him about this and he assured me that he was just thinking about boobies. Boobies always make him happy. Big Dog loves boobies.

10

24

266

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Tinder just paired me with someone called Jackie Weaver.

20

23

260

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Text from Grant: “What is an HGV?”

11

28

255

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Only 45 years to go until we see the benefits of Brexit. So looking forward to it.

7

33

255

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

Unfortunately I will no longer be launching my new show "Can I Be Frank?" on GB News. Earlier I accidentally dropped a 5kg dumbbell on my foot which caused me to lurch forwards and bang my head on the oven door before falling back into a holly bush. I will be out for some time.

30

22

251

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

4 years

Is there a way to delete all tweets that contain a specific slogan or name? Asking on behalf of some colleagues.

10

26

246

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

2 years

TILF.

17

33

252

Sir Frank Marcois

@frankmarcois

3 years

A constituent contacted me to say that the Chancellor should be gravely concerned about the oncoming energy price increases. I reassured him that the Chancellor is extremely wealthy.

4

36

246