โจIT'S BOOK 7 O'CLOCK!!!โจ thrilled to ~reveal~ the cover for THE RIVAL, a banter-filled, academic rivals-to-lovers, college YA from
@WednesdayBooks
set to hit shelves on january 23, 2025 ๐๐ you can preorder and add to goodreads now!
i went running in these pink shorts on the beach this morning and a woman i do not know yelled โhi barbie!โ and i yelled โhi barbie!โ back i canโt believe we both just peaked
taylor swift said thank you for social distancing here's the coziest stay at home chug your tea roll up your cardigan sleeves light your autumnal candle socially distanced album of all time
"romance novels are all so predictable" OF COURSE THEY ARE i go to starbucks and make the same order every time because i want to CONSUME THE THING THAT I LOVE over and over dear god let us LIVE
sometimes i'm like "what is wrong with millennial women" and then i remember how in the early 2000s special k tried to wipe us all out by telling us to replace breakfast and lunch with a cup of cereal and a splash of skim milk
stop getting mad about getting older. you think gouda gets mad when it gets older?? no. itโs just gets more expensive at trader joeโs. be like gouda!! know your worth!!!!!
i'm so glad taylor swift's "enchanted" is blowing up on tiktok right now because that song simply defines every crush a person will have in their entire lives. "please don't be in love with someone else"?? iconic. immaculate. other songs could never
every girl is defined by their one lost love. and by that i mean the one fast food item that was discontinued without warning, subsequently ruining their life
we are all talking so much about wonka but not NEARLY enough about the crime? of launching a movie about chocolate? without LAUNCHING A CHOCOLATE PRODUCT TIE-IN???? i can't be the only '90s kid absolutely FURIOUS that i still can't buy one of these wonka bars
authors: i'm stressed
fan fiction writers, chugging two cups of coffee on either side of them at 2am: it's finals week and i just got off a double shift please enjoy 10,000 words i just ripped out of my beating heart HAPPY TUESDAY MY FRIeNDS
i'm already so annoyed that my grandkids are going to be interviewing me for book reports on the 2020 pandemic expecting me to be profound and i'm gonna have to be like "i spent all the whole thing sending friends tiktok links against their will and eating cake and crying"
iโm at a john mulaney screening/talk about the sack lunch bunch and the kids are all here and LOSING THEIR ADORABLE MARBLES about seeing each other again and my heart is so full i may die
yes i am still single but also in my defense nobody has asked me to fake date them for the mutual benefit of our separate goals leading to a scenario in which we are trapped in a snow storm with only one bed and slowly confide our deepest secrets over the course of one night, so
the fact that teens today can just pull up fan fiction on their phones?? when sometimes i'd PRINT fan fictions from the FAMILY DESKTOP before we'd go on vacation????? i was born in the wrong time
friendly reminder that legally nothing counts in the days between christmas and new years, slide into those DMs, sleep through your alarms, run off to a greek island and get knocked up by one of three hot men and open your own hotel, everything is fair game
listen as a woman in her thirties i just didn't expect the curveball of taylor swift, a woman in her thirties, repeatedly releasing content at MIDNIGHT. i thought we we were in our bedtime era. our cozy sleepy time era. taylor .... taylor please
if you are a human who feels sad in january, a hufflepuff pro-tip: all the advent calendars are on sale and i can't think of one good reason why you shouldn't get a lil treat for getting through each day in january too
january in your thirties is wild because half your friends are doing dry january and half of them are pregnant and half of them are drunk texting you at 5pm on a tuesday about their exes and half of them are asking if you want to book a flight to italy and somehow this maths out
i know i'm not allowed to watch don't worry darling because i wouldn't be responsible enough to recognize a dangerous dystopian situation if i were married to harry styles
GOOD EVENING I was writing in the park on the same bench I do every night when A TINY! FUCKIN! PAW!!!! Taps my KEYBOARD and suddenly I am locking eyes with a full grown RACCOON who has NO RESPECT for the romantic TENSION I WAS TRYING TO BUILD good fuckin NIGHT I AM OUT!!!!!
a dear friend just texted me "we'll have to re-memorize all the lyrics to fearless before taylor swift releases the new version!!" and i've never been more insulted in my life!! i stayed through it all!!!! jump then FALL, bitch
the way every millennial reader knows precisely where they were sitting and what time of day it was when they first read peeta saying "maybe i'd think that too, caesar. if it weren't for the baby" and lost their SHIT
sorry to anyone who spent a long time shopping for valentine's day gifts because this picture of meghan markle and prince harry expecting baby number two is the best one anyone will ever receive ๐ญโค๏ธ
me every single night of the year: *stays up til 1am dicking around on the internet for absolutely no reason*
me on december 31: stay up until MIDNIGHT??? in THIS economy?????? SIR. good NIGHT
HARRY STYLES NEEDS TO APOLOGIZE TO EVERY HR DEPARTMENT ON THE PLANET FOR DROPPING THE
#HarrysHouse
TRAILER IN THE MIDDLE OF A WEDNESDAY IT WILL BE A MIRACLE IF I TYPE ANOTHER WORD AFTER THIS TWEET
i know millennials are getting old because i just slammed the follow button on rupert grint's instagram not for potential harry potter news, but solely for cute baby content
what i say: my favorite trope is enemies to lovers
what i mean: my favorite trope is enemies to begrudging respect to rivals to reluctant concern for each other's wellbeing to mutual understanding to fierce protectiveness to complete denial to SWEEPING DECLARATIONS to lovers
the older i get the more i appreciate that i have zero standards. i love most desserts. i do not get hung up on movie or book plots. i am just a little bit dumb and a little too easy to please and i am absolutely thriving
as a fan fic writer so far the weirdest thing about getting published is that the reviews coming in are written in actual human words and not just "kfjgalkdjgakldgjakjg" or "WHY"
it's been years but i'm still confused over why there was a love triangle in the hunger games. what part of "boy with the bread" does not immediately cancel out any other boy. he had BREAD. my god
"Basically, be a good little girl and shut up. Or you'll be punished" has been a central tenant in every creative industry i've encountered. TOSS THE DAMN GRENADE, GIRL.
#IStandWithTaylor
peeta would have been such a great fan fic writer. he pulled all the tropes out of his hat. you wanna kill us? we're in love. wanna kill us again? katniss is pregnant. wanna kill us *ANOTHER* time??? i'm brainwashed and only true love can bring me back. truly. a master class
please know that i am closed to any inquiries that do not directly relate to Dark Rey and her bombass double lightsaber for the rest of the day
#TheRiseOfSkywalker
the parallels between princess diana and meghan markle have been so stark for years, it just hurts my heart how disrespectful it is both to diana's legacy and to everything meghan has accomplished and will accomplish that the cycle has continued
after years of trying to assign myself a disney princess, adulthood has made me reckon with the fact that i am, in fact, the socially anxious and and overly-hydrated millennial icon that is panic from hercules