Candice @candice Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

@facefuckerr

@KS60a

@bokeplokalmalam

@33sacasna77

@AlisonCill

@JoshChuckMugg

@Vhoyde

@WinstaMum

@si_incess

@LifeSoFree_

@tousdayz

@MazingManda7777

@Pa1LHorse

@haellchin

@Sc16Fabricio

@avcanosa

@trulyyrocio

@Mea_Uno

@RandiHenderson_

@bartzlab

@Impr0visions

@Nobody_ist_back

@sliwnk

@MPKA__

@sc_asset

@luca_dx

@jenn0295

@DabbleDoodles

@bigslazboy

@raemyoon

@cell2109

@creeestina

@landonromano

@KleYukik

@bokeplokalmalam

@msantoriESQ

Candice

@candice

2 years

@ThreatNotation Turns out I can read music better than I thought. Turns out I should stop.

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Candice

@candice

8 years

@JeffFlake Why bother emphasizing you're taking calls just to make it clear you don't intend to consider what AZ voters like me have to say?

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Candice

@candice

4 years

People who sit in your cars for hours in the dark with the engine running, why do you do that?

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@bmxmom156 @greg_doucette @_flateric @WallofVets Questioning authority is healthy, hell, necessary. No child should ever be taught to blindly follow.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@lionloya @samelaanderson @noel_mace Stop bringing humans to work?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@Seainlvx @KariLake That's because you tried to vote twice and failed because the system works.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

I know it's almost certainly due to all the minerals I've googled recently in relation to #mincup , but the number of ads for engagement rings I'm seeing lately still seems quite presumptuous.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@JovanniOrtiz @AndrewYang That seems like the literal definition of sexism and racism. So, ew.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@ThePostsOffice Big boobs are a pain. The only pro is drawing attention, so of course that's what I'm doing with them.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@pylonfan This is her favourite pose. There's no way she's not intentionally setting a trap.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@MohanadElshieky Gosh, how romantic it would have been to be proposed to in the closed-door mop closet where TSA made my take off my top with no witnesses. What a dream.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@UnbiasedKatie @JamesEnsor Don't tell me what I should look like.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@l1ghtw0rkz @mainely_Sota @azteleman @Brandonstheguy @honestsportz @KariLake How are you going to insult someone for using an emoji when you've gone and spelled your username with numbers?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

Should be in bed, but instead I'm adding rules to my custom Twitter stylesheet to hide any tweet with a "show more" link.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

. @MineralCup Google ads might be about to make some wrong assumptions about me. But I was just trying to make sure I vote for the home team in #MinCup2021 , which I was only just made aware of (and, okay, I do prefer the sparkly ones that belong in jewelry...)

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@Freeyourmindkid I already saw this shit, so...

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Candice

@candice

4 years

I've lived in America for close to two decades now. I still haven't convinced any Americans that mid-90s Canadian alt-rock is the superior form of music. I'm losing hope.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@Mantia Everything about this is awesome. Including (maybe especially) this thread explaining things. Thank you for the wise words.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@man_ditch I got with an astronomer instead of an astrologer. Imagine my embarrassment

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Candice

@candice

1 year

@on_da_spectrum Who was the original guy?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

Hire someone to answer the damn phones instead of requiring everyone to take turns. Interruption by random social interaction or simply the irritating ringing made me anxious all day. They made me bring the thing with me when we went work from home, just to transfer every call!

Myk - 🇺🇦🌻🇵🇸🍉 - Here To Help

@mykola

2 years

If you're #ActuallyAutistic and have struggled to maintain a career, can you retweet this with a thread talking about what kinds of accommodations would have changed your life? What did you need and could never get? Let's show the world how easy it would be to make room for us.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@Aella_Girl @okcupid That's even worse than Trump's bullshit surveys. At least those let you answer "other".

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Candice

@candice

3 years

Hi, Internet. I want your upvotes. I started running. And now I can run for half an hour without stopping. I haven't managed that before, ever. Once upon a time I was good at sprinting and jumping, and even that was in high school. Please give me some kind of points to continue?

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@ChrisG_NSF From experience, if you seem to be serious, they'll seem to take you seriously. I'm somewhat convinced that 99% of flat Earth/moon landing denial bs began as jokes. It's hard to tell who really believes what, though. Poe's Law, and all.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@lockdownurlife Seems unnecessary. As far as I can tell they're currently pre-triggered and maybe we should hug them instead.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@ClaudiaGeorgios @djp2k18 @buitengebieden I agree. Every dog I've been well acquainted with has loved cucumber, but this one might just be too polite to take it away from the buns. Give the very good doggo a snack!

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@Aella_Girl It's not that I don't believe these dudes, but... Okay, I don't really believe these dudes. Not that your followers are going to be representative of dudes in general, so who knows. I also generally dislike receiving, so there's that bit to screw with my experience.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@lilowch "Get better" is subjective. Things will, though. That's obnoxiously difficult to prevent.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@avenaim @bjmapes @DanSlott It's campaign marketing garbage, probably unrelated to her online ballot request. Unless she went online and filled out a form to request to get another form by snail mail to fill out in order to request a ballot? Toss the trash, check registration online, wait for ballot.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

Thanks, ChatGPT, I'll try this tonight! Tropical Tilapia Cocktail 1 frozen tilapia fillet 1 can of pineapple tidbits with juice 1 can of lychee syrup 1/2 cup white rum 1/2 cup peach juice ice

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@Aella_Girl As an autistic person who has met you in person (but didn't interact with you very much because you were the only other person I noticed who was sitting alone at that party and seemed content to stay that way, observing everything else), I voted yes.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@t_lynettecarter @itsjustchrislol That seems to be the problem.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@imsfshook @ScottHech She looks like a normal 45-year-old woman who is simply not wearing makeup.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@BringBackGulagZ Who is supplying you with this script?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@PhysicsFox1 @MineralCup But which mineral is the ultimate mineral? Either way, opals are just irritating. Very tryhard. Quartz for sure.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

Hi, Internet. I am still alive.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

I tried again. Apparently I will never learn. Baths are still stupid. I want to trade brains with someone who enjoys them, because I can't see how it's possible. My butt is wet, my boobs are dry, I couldn't hear half of my podcast because I had to run more water to warm my butt.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

If anything is keeping me alive right now, it's the anticipation of hearing @BenjaminAhr and/or @CutForTime pronounce Chakotay the way the future's future thinks it should be pronounced.

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Candice

@candice

1 year

So did Agnès

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@okaychloegreen @forexposure_txt @Iron_Spike Got this argument from someone asking for my time and effort for free just yesterday. Pretty much said sure, you haven't made money from this project of yours YET, but you're assuming that you WILL, correct? Sometimes investing in an idea needs to be literal.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@l1ghtw0rkz @verkbench @mainely_Sota @azteleman @Brandonstheguy @honestsportz @KariLake I see. Well, then next time remove me from the replies when you post questions to Stanley.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

The dumb jokes have never bothered me (okay, some of the poor execution does...), but now I'm offended. Twitter is denying my very existence.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

Asking for a friend.............. If you were in control of someone's domain name that expired... uh, like, today,.... And you had asked multiple times "hey, let's transfer this, okay?" And they don't bother. For several years. Should I let it expire, or

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@NeuroClastic And if the body language and spoken language are communicating different things? I have no idea how to deal with that. Even though it seems to be the default! Everyone is lying all the time!

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@mikko @Viss Wait. But I already know who I know on Twitter. Do people not know who they know?

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@AZDHS @uarizona If today's 8am online appointments were gone well before 8am, can you let us how long before 11am on Friday we should actually start trying? Or were there none to begin with? Ugh.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@NeuroClastic I usually want to be sure someone has understood the facts of what I'm saying. Others seem to want to be sure someone has understood their emotions. The body language is absolutely different, but seemingly impossible for me to evaluate in the moment.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@MarisaKabas The thing I find most insane is that I've known so many women who have had women as doctors who were still dismissive of this kind of pain and bleeding. What the fuck?

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Candice

@candice

3 years

Have some Orion and friends from my light polluted apartment complex with some generic filters using my new #Pixel6Pro .

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@Aella_Girl Now ask whether they'd approach a taller woman, and whether a height difference makes them feel insecure. Because I'm not even that tall, but I've had quite enough annoying experiences.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@Aella_Girl I don't know that a poll can be unscientific. The interpretation of a poll could be, but your data is always out there, if somebody would like to interpret it differently.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

I don't know why I love this ugly photo of me but fuck you

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Candice

@candice

2 years

Clearly I am an expert gardener.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

I'm not sure whether I have only 5 people I'm following who still tweet, or if Twitter is choosing to show me only those 5 people's tweets.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@ladyleet @notwaldorf You got "cute" out of that!? Welp, I guess I stand by my "ew" reaction to your initial tweet.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@Viss See, that makes sense. But there are a bunch of people in my neighbourhood who are just... ALWAYS OUT THERE. All night, every night. I wondered if they were smokers, and just can't smoke at home, except I never see them smoking. I guess I should ask them to sell me some drugs.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

Besides body bags, my YouTube ads are all crypto bullshit, or from people who want me to buy their ebook to learn how they make $100,000 a month (I'm pretty sure it's by selling ebooks that explain how to make $100,000 a month, or they'd mainly keep doing the other thing).

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@kathrinebreda @bufordtjinder Guess what else masks can prevent!

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@nyttypos These jeans are not typos, but they certainly don't conform to any style guide.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

Maintenance man coming to fix my AC just now was absolutely baffled by the fact that my thermostat was set to Celsius. It displayed 20°, but he kept trying to turn it up, and was frustrated that it wouldn't go above 32.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@MineralCup Green green green green green Green

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Candice

@candice

3 years

Welp, the good news is I'm pretty sure I killed at least 95% of the 1000 spiderlings that just hatched in my office. The bad news is... I'm pretty sure I killed only 95% of the 1000 spiderlings that just hatched in my office.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@WeAreAutastic If I don't get enough of you to sign up they'll cut another one of my toes off

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@CyberSnark Sound better, no batteries to wear out... Much more likely to cause sudden earhole trauma when I catch the cord on a door handle. 50/50

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Candice

@candice

3 years

If I wasn't expecting a package, I'd find random texts with photos of my mailbox mildly threatening.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@Aella_Girl I've seen too much. I've circled back around to sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@Chinchillazllla That's one photo. Here's another one. Meh, still want.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@alanaevansxxx @APAGunion If you didn't tell us it was coming... nothing would have happened. Exactly in the way it's not happening now.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

They're supposed to be cherry tomatoes, so they were never going to be very big... Anyway. Behold!

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@MowtenDoo I've spent hours of my life arguing takedowns on the basis of "um, we own this this!??" Shit's busted.

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Candice

@candice

1 year

@brainspiked @whatsuptucson They could just say yes, right? Easy. The answer is yes.

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Candice

@candice

9 years

Nah, but look! I haven't been able to vote legally ANYWHERE SINCE.. uh.... 2000-I-forget. http://t.co/C4OBYqUNaF

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@erinisaway @crimefish What? Who is this "they"?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@l1ghtw0rkz @verkbench @mainely_Sota @azteleman @Brandonstheguy @honestsportz @KariLake You are replying to a person named Stanley.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@sissyloser152 @AlsJane_therapy I was diagnosed with depression, and being self-employed, couldn't get health insurance again, period, until ACA. Now I have bipolar on my records. I will never pursue autism or anything else they can't even do fuck all about. To hell with people who judge the undiagnosed.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@chaykak Oh, ok, I see. You're that sort of trash.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@TSLA4orphans @Rainmaker1973 It's just a funny bird

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@Viss Yes, that is the same thing...

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@ToS_Respecter Parents really need to have a conversation with their children about choosing only sex toys made with body safe materials.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@Theiss2Jack @Yes99T @elonmusk Do you see any clothes?

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@avenaim @bjmapes @DanSlott You can also actually use that thing to register, it's just designed to be thrown out by anyone who doesn't want to vote for Trump. If it's the same thing I've seen, anyway. It's past my bedtime to be squinting that hard.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@kadska @chairhair22 You can kinda dunk them in like teabags. Sigh.

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Candice

@candice

3 years

@crimefish I don't think we disagree. I have THOUGHTS about Mastercard at the moment! I'm really really fucking mad. When there's no alternative form of payment available, their rules are equivalent to censorship. I guess I get pedantic, but I think you're on my side and I can calm down!

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Candice

@candice

4 years

"There have been no charges filed against Radvinsky and the allegations within the banking documents are not conclusive evidence of any criminal wrongdoing." Fucking yawn. Yeah, banks are suspicious prudes. Such shocking exposé! Time to buy more Doge?

Scott Stedman (indefinite hiatus)

@ScottMStedman

4 years

BREAKING: Secret documents reveal that multiple banks filed suspicious activity reports on @onlyfans and @MyFreeCams owner Leonid Radvinsky, warning that he may be laundering money and providing platforms to underage and/or coerced sex-workers:

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Candice

@candice

4 years

I need some LSD.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

Unfortunately for me, my Commodore 64 had a 1200 baud modem and I basically went straight from learning to read to FidoNet. Whoops.

Jimmy.. 💙✊🏾💙

@GenX_74

2 years

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Candice

@candice

3 years

Someone told me "I'm sorry you feel that way" in response to me trying to explain facts to them that I don't necessarily feel any particular way about. I'm most frustrated when people don't understand why I'm frustrated. Either way, that's a non-apology!

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@TheMichaelHammo @Phantom0f0pera So what is your point, then? As I said, I'm not defending the big bang, but why do you have this particular vendetta, and why bring it up here, since it's completely unrelated to carbolic acid? What did the big bang do to hurt you?

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Candice

@candice

3 years

Actually, I'd like to see someone spoil Dune. For educational purposes. I've read the book 47 times, and I can't even adequately summarize the basic plot to anyone.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@FhockeyfanSp @lukeoneil47 Well, in theory. I think that was the point? Because who should I vote for to fight fascism? That hasn't really been an option on any ballot I've received lately.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@Phantom0f0pera Do you have a better theory?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

One day I'll cut hot peppers and then not immediately touch my eyes and/or nose before adequately washing my hands. But that day is not today.

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Candice

@candice

1 year

@ZachWeiner I cannot do anything if I'm being watched. Never could. I can do the thing, but performing doing the thing in a pretty way for an audience is too much. Do you like it when people watch you draw?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

@TanukisRevenge Hi, I live in southern Arizona, and I wish you would have yelled at me that it was already too late.

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Candice

@candice

2 years

Cats. Just my cats.

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@UnbiasedKatie @JamesEnsor (Seriously, though... I get the sentiment, but you're being so very absolute, and it's total bullshit. Of course no one should feel that they have to shave in order to conform to men's expectations. But there are a billion other reasons why people modify things about themselves.)

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Candice

@candice

4 years

@Viss What if "friend" means "ex" and no updates in months means they want their domain redirected to... I dunno, whatever we're redirecting to this week?

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Candice

@candice

2 years

Pretty sure this election is just a ploy to make me pay for YouTube.

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Candice

@candice