aeia @badboyrepublic Twitter profile

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

distance is my new answer. I no longer react, I no longer argue, I simply remove myself.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

when I'm already in an irritable mood and someone decides to have zero common sense around me.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

"are you okay?" no, from the bottom of my heart, I'm tired.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

maybe it's sounds so selfish but honestly I feel so comfortable when no one's at home. being left at home while no one's around feel soooooo so gooooood, I feel emotionally and mentally safe. a home feels like home when no one's around, no loud anger, no shaming ksksksksks

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I immediately go silent when something upsets me. it's a coping mechanism I have developed over time. instead of expressing my anger or frustration, I simply withdraw and try to process my emotions in private. I prefer handling my problems on my own.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I really want to hug someone so tight and tell how drained and tired I am. I want to sob hard.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

happy mother's day to all eldest daughter who had to face parenthood and take their parents responsibilities early. you are all valued and I'm so proud of you!🫶🏻

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

that random urge to just cry everything

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

when you randomly cry because you still get flashbacks from your past, knowing it'll always be at the back of your head no matter what you do or how much time has passed.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

be careful, cause you'll never understand the damage you did to someone not until the same thing is done to you. I swear, whatever goes around eventually comes back to you :)

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

nobody knows how many times I've sat in my room and cried, how many times I've lost hope, how many times I've been let down, how many times to hold back tears. sometimes the strongest people are the one who cried behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

it's not just Friday, but it's also the last day of the month. you've been so brave marching through life and surviving this month of March, what a rollercoaster ride. I'm so proud of you!

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

we were so excited to become adult, but look at us now, tired, lost and confuse about future.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

death doesn't scare me, academic failure does.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

silent breakdown because no one knows how tired and exhausted I am.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

lately, it feels draining. no amount of rest can suffice this tiredness. but I know that this day will pass like other days. I just need to hang on to see the edge. but what I can do now is take a deep breath. trying to swim through the ocean inside me that tries to drown me.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

sometimes it's hard for me to communicate how I feel because I don't always understand why I feel the way I feel. I need someone who is patient enough to understand my silence. sometimes I really don't want to vent, I just want someone to be there for me so I don't feel alone.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

let me guess. you're in the stage where you're not sad about it, but you think about it often. you regret it but also glad it happened. you're not angry but disappointed. you don't miss it but you miss the feeling it gave you.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

feeling okay> triggered> relapse> feeling okay again

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

be careful with your words because you'll never know how much it keeps repeating in someone's mind.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I wanna become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I'm definitely not the ideal kind of friend. I disappear a lot, I'm barely available, I find comfort in being distant especially when I'm dealing with my own struggles too. it's my coping mechanism, but I'll try to be there for your as much as I can that's the thing about me.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

i promised myself to be better this time. but I still end up being disappointed to myself once more.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

she's standing on the line between giving up and seeing how much more she can take :(

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

it's either I distance to protect myself or I distance to protect others from me. I know when my peace is at risk. I also know when I'm being toxic already. in both situations the best approach for me is to disconnect until things get calm.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

right now, I can't afford any situation that might drain me and bring the worst in me again. I know I can no longer recover easily as it requires too much for me, I've had enough already. I just want peace and calmness in life.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

its unfair no? we were doing our best to make them special, treat them good and gave them assurance. We treat them the way they deserve but in the end, all they give is heartache, betrayal, ungrateful, plasticity and even questioning your worth.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

the understanding and soft hearted girl inside me is dying.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

after acads and finals, may we experience the best rest we deserve and may we feel our genuine laugh again.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

no one can noticed that I'm at my lowest again without me telling them. it is unfair how I know when they are at their lowest and still be there for them.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

behind my loud annoying personality it's just a little me who wants to run away and disappear.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

i think we all need someone who’ll make us feel heard and validated; they are to remind us that we can openly communicate our feelings with them without having to worry on how they will react or take it.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I hate the fact that I used to think that I was just paranoid or overthinking when the whole time I was right.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

u have no idea how hanging out can temporarily heal someone. after school, the first thing that comes to mind is to go somewhere, anywhere peaceful just to escape the toxic household. then we'll laugh continuously there the place that feels safer than our so-called homes.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

I hate being suspicious about things, but damn gut feeling is always right.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

and all of a sudden I felt really tired. like the world has drained me for everything that I had.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

I'm literally so tired of being nice to people and going out of my way to make sure they're okay and happy just to be treated like sht.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

did it bother me? yes. am i going to say something? no.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

silence is the best attitude when you are disappointed with the situation.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

one of the most priceless feelings in the world is knowing that there's someone who is truly proud of me even for the smallest of my achievements. it validates my efforts and reminds me that it is okay to fail at times because I got these people anyway.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I really don't know why some people don't even think about other people's feelings and keep on being so insensitive and still invalidating someone's feelings.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

have you ever acted independent ang strong, but deep inside you still have this inner child of yours who wants to experience dancing under the rain, enjoying slides, playing with the swing, rolling over on the grass and wanting to hear compliments.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

can someone enter my life without disappointing me in the end?

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

when u realize that you will never healed from all the traumas you've ever had and just simply accepted the fact that you'll always be stuck in that dark place.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

this week is so draining. lately having sleepless nights due to bunch of workloads and mental breakdown. actually don't know how I continues dealing this hell week but still proud of myself for being tough and I guess, after all, I deserve the rest I needed.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

be proud of how you've been handling these past months. the silent battles you fought, the moments you had to humble yourself. wipe your own tears and pat yourself on the back. celebrate your strength :)

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

Goal for this month: survive again.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

honestly can't find anything more peaceful than sleeping during the day to avoid everyone and staying up through the night because it's the only time when everything is quiet.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

brb, I'm having a war with my head rn

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

little did they know how dark my mind is. the attempts I keep on silent, the secrets I bury deep inside, the struggles I face alone, the demons I battle everyday & the pain that I've never shown. the unsaid thoughts that says "why is life unfair to me?"

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

until now, no one knows my favorite food, the flower I want so bad, the song that can make me blushing no matter how many times I listened and the song that can hit me into the pieces.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

life's starting to feel like I should cut everyone off again and deal by myself.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

it hurts, that no matter how hard I try to change and think positive, I still keep on going back to this phase of being alone and lost

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

if peace means cutting ppl off, putting it phone in silence mode, stepping away without a word, or even if it means being alone, then I'm good with it.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

why am I not allowed to get angry, but everyone is allowed to do things they know that will make me angry and then make excuses for it ?????

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I push away the people I want the most in my life & I tell myself that it's because I need to learn to live w/out attachments. but deep inside, all I want is for someone to resist my efforts at pushing them away & tell me I am worth holding on to even when I'm acting like a child

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I can't even describe how I'm feeling rn, all I can say is that, it hurts... a lot.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

it's hurting me but nevermind.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I can't do it anymore. I can't fix it anymore because I'm here again at the situation that I don't want to be again.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ᵐᵉᵈʸᵒ ᵗᵃⁿᵍᵃ ᵃᵏᵒ ˢᵃ ᵖᵃʳᵗ ⁿᵃ ᵏᵃʰⁱᵗ ᵗᵃᵐᵇᵃᵏ ⁿᵃ ˢᶜʰᵒᵒˡ ʷᵒʳᵏˢ, ᶜʰⁱˡˡ ᵖᵃᵈᵉⁿ ᵃᵏᵒ. ᵀʷⁱᵗᵗᵉʳ ᵖᵃ ˢⁱˢ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

ma, I'm tired. I am so tired that I wish I could tell every single thing that is happening with my life rn.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

I have conquered so much battles without anyone's help. I have cried every night without anyone knowing about it. I always stand up when I stumble and fall. but idk how much longer I can keep standing back up after every fall.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ˢᵉˡᵉⁿᵒᵖʰⁱˡᵉ ⁻ ᵃ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ʷʰᵒ ˡᵒᵛᵉˢ ᵐᵒᵒⁿ ᴬˢᵗᵉʳᵒᵖʰⁱˡᵉ ⁻ ᵃ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ʷʰᵒ ˡᵒᵛᵉˢ ˢᵗᵃʳˢ ᴺʸᶜᵗᵒᵖʰⁱˡᵉ ⁻ ᵃ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ʷʰᵒ ˡᵒᵛᵉˢ ᵈᵃʳᵏⁿᵉˢˢ ᴾˡᵘᵛⁱᵒᵖʰⁱˡᵉ ⁻ ᵃ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ʷʰᵒ ˡᵒᵛᵉˢ ʳᵃⁱⁿ ᴹᵉ ⁻ ᵃ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ʷʰᵒ ˡᵒᵛᵉˢ ʸᵒᵘ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

finish studies, get a stable job, build confidence and be rich.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

hmm

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

"your trauma made you stronger" no. my trauma made me traumatized, weak, gave me sleepless nights & memory loss & unwanted feelings. I made myself stronger by dragging myself out of the dark place & dealing w consequences that weren't my fault.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

they say to enjoy ur life when u're still young. but I think my life situation rn is far from that. there are a lot of disappointments, doubts & probs that I don't know how to overcome. it hurts me so much; everything hurts. my chest & heart feel so heavy that I want is to cry.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I'm dnd person, u lucky if I'm not ignoring you.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

it's either I distance to protect myself or I distance to protect others from me. I know when my peace is at risk and I also know when I'm being toxic already. in both situations, the best approach for me is to disconnect until things get calm.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ᶜʳᵃᵛⁱⁿᵍ ᶠᵒʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗⁱᵍʰᵗᵉˢᵗ ʰᵘᵍ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

the way I value people makes me wish I had someone like me in my life. sometimes, I longing for the same appreciation and understanding I give to others, the way I care, treat and love the people around me makes me hope I could meet someone exactly like me.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

little miss smiling and laughing so much in public but can't stop crying silently whenever she's alone

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I wish I had a place to go where I could hide, cry and scream when I don't want to be in our house :)

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

let's unleash our inner child at the amusement park

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

I thought I was getting better, I honestly did. but sometimes I just lay in bed at 3am trying to figure out what the fvck is wrong with me and why I'm never enough.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

I keep reminding myself to appreciate myself more bc life has been so hard for me lately. The academic pressure has just been too much. Surviving each day feels hard. I need to keep reminding myself the reason why i started and why I kept ongoing or else I might lose myself soon.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ᴵ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᵃ ˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ᵈⁱˢᵉᵃˢᵉ ᶜᵃˡˡᵉᵈ: ▪️ᴹᵃʳᵘᵖᵒᵏⁱˢᵐ ▪️ˢᵃⁿᵃᵒⁱˡⁱˢᵐ ▪️ˢᵉˡᵒˢᵃᵗⁱˢᵐ ▪️ᶜᵘᵗⁱˢᵐ ▪️ᴾⁱᵏᵒⁿⁱˢᵐ ▪️ᴬⁿᵗᵒᵏⁱⁿⁱˢᵐ ▪️ᴳᵘᵗᵒᵐⁱⁿⁱˢᵐ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I don't know what kind of rest should I do to be able to regain myself :)

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

just wanna stay busy so I don't have time to feel anything :)

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

it hurts seeing them move on so fast like your presence never really mattered to them.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

I wish I had spent more time on self-improvement and focusing on myself instead of worrying so much about what others thought of me. I realize how much I could have achieved if I had just taken the time to focus on myself.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I don't want to be hurt again so I started to become quiet, I stopped expecting. I'm starting to care less each day.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

i have my limitations, i’m not always kind and understanding.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

really thought I was over this era sksksksks guess we'll never get over questioning our self worth :)))

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

why can't people realize that their words can hurt.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ᵍᵃⁿᵈᵃ ⁿᵍ ᵖᵃˢᵒᵏ ⁿᵍ ᵒᶜᵗᵒᵇᵉʳ ˢᵃᵏⁱⁿ ˢᵃᵏⁱᵗ ᵃᵍᵃᵈ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ᵍᵃᵍᵒ ᵖᵃˡᵘⁿᵍᵏᵒᵗ ⁿᵃ ⁿᵍ ᵖᵃˡᵘⁿᵍᵏᵒᵗ ʸᵘⁿᵍ ᵇᵘʰᵃʸ ᵏᵒ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

leaving me is okay, people leave me all the time, I'm used to it. what hurts tho is when you made me feel so special one day and the next day I was so unwanted.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

no, you only like me when it's convenient for you.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ᵉʸʸ ᵐᵃᶜᵃʳᵉⁿᵃ ᵐᵃᶜᵃʳᵉⁿᵃ ᵐᵃᶜᵃʳᵉⁿᵃ, ᵘᵐᵃᵃᵇᵒᵗ ᵃᵏᵒ ᵏᵃʰⁱᵗ ˢᵃᵃⁿ ⁿᵃ ʰⁱⁿᵈⁱ ᵃˡᵃᵐ ⁿⁱ ᵐᵃᵐᵃ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

1 year

I'm starting to realize that maybe being by myself is actually better than surrounding myself with people who make me feel alone.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

I have so much to say but I have no clue how to say it.

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

ᵏⁱˢˢ ᵒⁿ ᶠᵒʳᵉʰᵉᵃᵈ ᵃʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ˢʷᵉᵉᵗᵉˢᵗ ᵏⁱˢˢ ᵉᵛᵉʳ

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

5 years

Tbh may mga babae talagang consistent. Once they like someone, hirap na agad silang kalimutan ito. It takes months and sometimes years yung feelings nila sa taong yun. Pag ikaw at ikaw lang talaga. Once you find that kind of person please keep her dahil bihira na lang yung ganyan

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aeia

@badboyrepublic

2 years

walang katapusang relapse.