در بہ در @ZaphodGigglebox Twitter profile

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1 year

heard this dua, "umeed hai aap jahan bhi rahein khush rahein, abaad rahein, apnoN mei rahein." brought tears to my eyes. so beautiful to wish upon someone kei woh apnoN mei reh sakein

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

so sorry i say this, but same with german muslims. simple pattern one can observe: the more islamophobic a society/country is and the more it ostracizes the muslim community, the more conservative the muslims become to preserve identity & community. unfortunately a vicious cycle

Ayla ☾

@A_rndm

6 months

english speakers think uk muslims are the worst, you're so lucky you don't understand french muslims

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 months

my controversial opinion is i feel v uncomfortable & uneasy around hawkish business-minded ppl with a money-making mindset bcause so much of that personality can carry over into their personal lives & they always seem opportunistic, transactional, matlab-parast. lacking sincerity

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

desi ppl who were born in a stable home are the nepo kids of happiness

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

lmao amma telling me about this rishtedar boy who knew this girl. they liked each other and wanted to get married but parents sternly refused. so they both plotted, individually got into masters programs in UK, got there, cut off from their parents asap and got married 😂👏

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

half of lahore's current toddler population is walking around named elina/aleyana/alayna/elaya or something like that just because their parents wanted to give them a highly anglicized name 😭💀

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

tourists visiting europe: people living in europe:

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

it's genuinely heartbreaking to see how this is so prevalent in europe, root cause being europe's deep-rooted overarching racism which over time, literally disables certain minority communities from being healthy or functional.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

shahroz sabzwari apne abbu ki zindagi bhar ki kamaai hui izzat chai mei biskut ki tarha daboo daboo ke khaa raha hai

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

and this is in EXTREME contrast to muslim community in north america. coming from eurpoe, it blows your mind to see how prosperous and progressive (in a very holistic perspective) the muslim community there is. america isnt perfect but the degree of agency afforded is miles apart

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

using children as a prop to conveniently erase out the massive asymmetry of power that exists between the two sides and the highly unequal history of atrocities committed for decades is just... sad. wouldve been better to just not have said anything.

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@Malala

1 year

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@ZaphodGigglebox

2 months

junaid jamshed bc fraudiye aitebaar aa hi nahi raha

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@ZaphodGigglebox

10 months

kaash grade 8 mei kisi ne 2 thapaar laga ke bola hota "chup chaap computer science parho." aaj mei aram se programming kar ke note chaap rahi hoti. apni marzi ki parhai kar ke tou career ka moye moye hi ho gaya hai

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

mans abrar ul haq wouldve absolutely killed it at coachella instead we got... ali sethi...

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 months

the moving from pakistan to north america/europe to starting to romanticise tf out of a potential future life in the middle east pipeline

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

imagine ur on your 598th tweet and pak army announces martial law 😭

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

pakistani tv pei moroccan dramay nahi chaltay. and unlike turkey, morocco doesnt have an islamist megalomaniac as leader whom pakistanis can romanticize. ab iss situation mei empathy kahan se layen ham 🙃

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@RotiKholDeyo

1 year

Morocco is a Muslim country too and yet we haven't seen the same response as Pakistanis had when Turkey was struck with an earthquake.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

This is how a precedent is set. You do not see Meesha's team peddling lies or twisted facts out to the public. You do not see them manipulating the public and involving media houses as part of it. Might I add, only the truly desperate and despicable need stoop so low.

Noor Ejaz Chaudhry

@noorejazch

4 years

Leave granted by the Supreme Court of Pakistan in Meesha Shafi vs The Governor of Punjab to consider whether all women, including students, are covered under Pak's harassment law! We're very proud today & for Mr. Khwaja Ahmad Hosain for the most brilliant advocacy!

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

desi guy: having destructive full-blown anger issues their mom: ji bas aaj kal zara sa chirchiraa rehta hai hehe 😅🥰

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@ZaphodGigglebox

3 years

been noticing this for a while and will just say it i rlly like how this guy is having concerts across pakistan and i really mean across pakistan! cities like multan okara etc.irks me when i see many popular singers playing mainly only in upper class/elite unis/schools in lhr isb

Asim Azhar

@AsimAzharr

3 years

200 MILLION views on tera woh pyar!!! ♥️ and this is how we celebrated in Multan. So beautiful. Bohat bohat bohat shukriyaaa

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

@NPinjos agree. foundationally, north amercian muslims were quite empowered (education, wealth etc) & it cyclically continued through generations. for european muslims this widely has not been the case, and the society functionally ostracizes them making it worse (vicious cycle here)

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 years

@spectatorindex and his daughter has been sentenced to 7 years of imprisonment

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 months

didnt know weddings in some parts of the world include rehearsal processions with the planners. in pakistan the bride and groom just show up in the middle of chaos and hope for the best

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

the universe leaves you in awe. subah behen se kaha "life me bas itna ameer hona hai ke strawberries& blueberries araam se khareed sakun" aaj grocery shop gai strawberries 45% off thin. mei ameer nahi hui lekin aaj ke liye woh phal meri pohonch mei aa gaya. gratitude, forever 💖

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 years

had pakistan not provided its full support to foreign powers & had it refrained from intervening in afghanistan, the afghans would have never had to come to pakistan to escape their plight. we have afghan blood on our hands. shoaib can keep his hateful, racist stances to himself.

M. Sarosh Ebrahim

@msarosh

5 years

Shoaib Akhtar 100% right, almost all of them have Pakistani ID card, all of them learned all their cricket in Pakistan. Afghanis are Haramkhors no two ways about it.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

if he said all of this on-record despite having maintained an über-nice-guy public image all his life, one can only imagine the kind of remarks he has passed behind the cameras and the kind of filth he is capable of doing

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 years

some people are so incredibly kind, sensitive, and selfless it angers me so much to see the universe being cruel to them

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@ZaphodGigglebox

9 months

i bet studies will show how the male loneliness epidemic coincides with more and more women living happier, more wholesome and independent lives, without having to do emotional labour or become punching bags for men

rameen

@rameenwhile

9 months

personally I am a big fan of the male loneliness epidemic

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@ZaphodGigglebox

11 months

one thing im certain of: if a bunch of white dudes team up and tell everyone it's "too complicated" to shut us up, ALWAYS speak about it!!! and SHOUT at the top of your lungs!! even if you get antagonised for it. i promise you the worlds future generations will be grateful to you

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

this man, with his blinding disinformation, is singlehandedly after all persons, institutions, & platforms that stand in solidarity with or to guard women & their rights. he has no qualms about maligning and destroying the rest, in an attempt to protect his own interests.

Ali Zafar

@AliZafarsays

4 years

@WomenInLawPk I would advise a “little” homework. People are smart :) Also next time your founding members want me at their function and I refuse, don’t take it personally. Be responsible. We are entering 2021. It’s a new world.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

me going to the drawing room to greet the mehmaan, ammi se 3 thappar khanay ke baad

Donald J. Trump

@realDonaldTrump

4 years

FEELING GREAT!

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@ZaphodGigglebox

7 months

what did the mining company say to the mineral reserves? "teri ORE , teri ORE, teri ORE, haye rabba..."

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

almost every year my prof. would take his group to the research-mile by the river & explain his work to little kids, their parents, young students. he'd say it was important b/c the only way any discipline thrives & succeeds is when it becomes accessible & understandable for all

Roshni Rao

@drroshnirao

4 years

Academia puts too much emphasis on sounding intelligent as a metric of success. Meanwhile, there are people changing the world by leading with kindness and empathy. All this is to say your degree means nothing if you can’t back it up with some humanity. @OpenAcademics #phdchat

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@ZaphodGigglebox

11 months

your time is too precious to argue with any german who accuses you of antisemitism for supporting palestinian freedom. just say, "no. thats what your grandfather was 🤢🤮" and move on

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

perhaps you wanted to sound morally righteous while still appeasing to the western establishments. people calling for an end to occupation and apartheid do NOT condone or celebrate the harming of children ANYWHERE,in any way. sadly your statement necessitates me to point that out

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@ZaphodGigglebox

11 months

i cannot say this enough times, i really need to let it out. the way germans are bloodthirsty after palestinians is mentally paralyzing to witness. the third reich may have ended but the genes got passed down really neat. it's a lot of repressed nazism in full display everywhere.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 years

"war is not something i'm fond of but i'm patriotic."- satement by a UN ambassador, priyanka chopra. why did she use the word "but"? patriotism and backing a war don't go hand in hand. you CAN be a patriot and STILL call out war atrocities, only if you truly are for peace (oops!)

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@ZaphodGigglebox

11 months

most ppl saying "lets call for peace" only now basically mean "lets call for momentary peace so israel can go back to operating their apartheid prison, legitimizing occupation, exercising police brutality, displacing palestinians–with no resistance while we pretend not to notice"

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

I hope people realise and practice this more: when you're around friends or family who are working on body image issues, it's not just enough to not comment on their weight/body, but also very important not to comment on your own body/weight in a derogatory way.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

sister was playing a football match and these were the spectators 😭😭😭

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

damn i need the confidence of a basic aitchisonian dude whose school pride is his only personality trait

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 month

overheard at train station, little kid: mummy dekho meine suitcase pei password laga diya hai!!! *10 seconds later* "lekin yaad nahi aa raha ab!!!"

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

the eldest sister urge to treat everyone even slightly youner than you as your younger sibling

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

no one: diaspora pakistanis: ive eaten KFC in NEW YORK🗽 LONDON🇬🇧 TOKYO🗼 the BERMUDA TRIANGLE🌊 queen elizabeth's DINING ROOM😍👑 DUBAI🏙️😎... but🤧🤧 KFC PAKISTAN is the BEST 😍🙌🇵🇰💯😩!!!!

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

are your fancy diplomas even worth anything if you've not figured how to separate trash in G*rMaNy

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@ZaphodGigglebox

8 months

im sorry but i have to let it out 😭 meine british-pakistanis se baray namoonay kabhi nahi dekhay 😭😭

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 months

pak twitter is so extremely shocking and confouding tbh. you get to read random ppls tweets and see the kind of men that are out in public. inkay gharon mei inko kisi ne bhi kabhi koi tameez nahi sikhayi hoti kya?? how's that even possible, it's so so insane!!

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

the neighbour to our right is a multimillionaire whose house the police have sealed multiple times in front of us all due to tax evasion & fraud. yet everyone calls him "haji saahab" and theirs is probably one of the most respected families around. money makes everyone blind

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

every time a woman stands up for another woman's dignity and safety, she's also ensuring and standing up for her own safety, and that of many other women. this is how we bring down the farsoodah nizaam of our our society. together, for one another.

. . 𝓐. .💖

@Afr33n_a

1 year

A rishta came for me. Guys mum goes; His divorced & we gave the kid to the mum he has no contact Me: No issue being divorced/the child. Issue is the mum encouraged him to disown his blood & he went with it, If he can do that, he'd disown me in a heartbeat🙃 No thanks.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

8 months

i'm just a girl ❌ mein ladizz hun ✅

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@ZaphodGigglebox

2 months

"people killed due to sectarian violence in parachinar" is the pakistani version of "palestinians lost lives in israe|-h/mas war" GENOCIDE. it is part of the SHIA GENOCIDE. enabled and backed by the state.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 months

bachpan me school ke bahir eik buzurg uncle rerhi pe shakrkandi (garmiyon me ice gola) bechtey they he was so sweet and kind. often have him in my thoughts, wish there was a way of finding him or getting in touch with him again. i hope hes doing well and life has been good to him

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 month

twitter is all about sending your silly little fun tweets out in the void until one of them accidentally lands in the jaahil pakistani incel men part of twitter 💀

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 months

kisi baat ke hawaley se i told my friend mere ghar tv nahi hai, kuch saal pehlay kharab ho gaya tha aur naya khareednay ke paise nahi they so weve just continued life without it since. and this is how she responded 😭💀

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 months

all that display of palestinian solidarity at eurovision... i just know germans watching it in their homes are having nonstop aneurysms

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

being a tourist in europe vs living in europe

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

if a man ever asks you to do parda by wearing extra clothing, in return please ask him to always leave his home blindfolded so he does parda of his nazar/sight. you *cannot* have him looking at other women outside. it's the only way this equation balances out. hope it helps <3

Khadiجah

@superkhadijaman

1 year

Dear men, if a girl is convincing you to do parda and cover yourself, doesn't mean she doesn't trust you, this means you're precious to her and women outside aren't women anymore, they are wolves. She wants you to protect from all bad eyes and animals outside.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

10 months

i asked amma "what would you do if i was a worm" and she called me to say "massal ke maar deti, aur kya karna tha.." 😭 aaj bhi ro ro ke hi neend aayegi

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

ghatya insaan. will never forget the day little zainab was found dead, this man as sitting minister victim-blamed and said parents should be responsible for where their children are, instead of condemning and acting against the pedophile rings operating in kasur and other places

Khan’s ally

@WithIK_V

1 year

Interior Minister of Pakistan knowing the gross human rights violations taking place l on women under custody has started to do victim blaming that if any woman comes up with rap* allegation it will mean she is lying. @hrw @volker_turk

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@ZaphodGigglebox

10 months

had work planned out for today but instead im here crying because this reminded me bachpan mei dadajan always taking us to azam ki dukaan in b block after his namaz and would let us get anything we wanted so brother and i would go crazy with excitement every time

viberator•

@thatsadrizlaa

10 months

aao

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

replies show weve entered classic left-wing vs right-wing territory: is it important to ensure empathetic treatment of any minority/foreign group so they progressively prosper, or should we just relegate them as outcasts/troublemakers. u can gauge your politics by how you align

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

so sorry i say this, but same with german muslims. simple pattern one can observe: the more islamophobic a society/country is and the more it ostracizes the muslim community, the more conservative the muslims become to preserve identity & community. unfortunately a vicious cycle

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

fun fact: cacao (chocolate) beans aren't always brown or black, but often tend to be violet too, depending on the fermentation conditions. below is a moderate quality picture of the purple beans after being cut

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@ZaphodGigglebox

11 months

weird relationship: the more narcissistic a person/entity, the greater their need to feel and project themselves as the victim. and they often become so blindly consumed by this victim complex that it ends up becoming their own trap and leads to a self-exposé

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

unlike replying to texts, apparently you do not need any serotonin to tweet absolute crap 24/7

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@ZaphodGigglebox

10 months

im that non-smoker friend who starts talking about cancer every time a friend pulls out a cigarette or mentions anything smoking related 😭 sorry

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

so many men in pakistan really cant stand as much as *looking* at happy, successful, emancipated women even from afar (who obviously happen to be way outside their league), and immediately resort to saying things like "buddhi" "paise ke peechay hai" etc as a knee jerk reaction

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@ZaphodGigglebox

3 years

so after graduation this guy totally disappeared from the face of earth and just made an appearance on instagram with the hottest girl possible. mans really won at life 👏

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

jump on to the next massive failure

Philosophy Of Life

@PhilOfLife_

1 year

What is the first thing you do after a massive failure?

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@ZaphodGigglebox

6 months

perhaps Irfan Khan Phenomenon: theyre a minority trying to survive in a society so deeply plagued with hateful far-right intolerance which can in any moment threaten their peace/security of life so they decide to double-down on those very sentiments as self-protective mechanism

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

not me regularly opening random school books to find love letters left by my sister 😂😍😭😭

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@ZaphodGigglebox

8 months

3 constants in life: - death - taxes - pakistani aadmiyon ka maar peet ya aurton ko sexually harass karnay ke baad har jagah defamation notices bhijwana🤢

Ashfaq Ishaq Satti

@SattiAshfaqe

8 months

I have sent legal notice to @RabiaAnumm for defaming me

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@ZaphodGigglebox

10 months

"what radicalized you" bachpan mei was driven thru a labour camp in dubai,saw the living conditions. a painful realization that the world is so fundamentaly&entirely rooted in injustice. every minute of comfort u r able to experience, undeniably comes at the cost of someone elses

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

did you load the 5 gallon water bottles on dispensers at home to defy patriarchy and prove you were strong & independent enough or are you normal

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 years

my sister's not in this picture; she was crying at that moment due to being sick (hasn't recovered from typhoid) and thought she couldn't play. she then scored 7 of those 26 goals and is currently the tournament's leading goal scorer. you're a champ, @gilani_dua 💖 keep fighting!

FootballPakistan.com

@FootballPak

5 years

WAPDA women's team defeated hosts Khyber Pakhtunkhwa 26-0 in the #NationalGames2019 football competition. In a bizarre move, the match was reduced to 70mins because "larkian jaldi thak jati hain" as somebody said at the venue, they are already playing on a smaller pitch.🤦🏾‍♀️

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@ZaphodGigglebox

9 months

this one time i told a jordanian guy at uni i know a bit of arabic and he got so excited with a big smile...then i completed my sentence "because i lived in UAE for some time" and he suddenly looked at me like he was about to puke in my face😭 we also never spoke again after that

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 months

have reached "fk it ill just eat this kiwi with the chilkaa on" phase in life because kaun fazool mei itni mehnat karay cheelnay ki

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

@chaiandkimchi and like, dessert tastes totally OKAY in the same plate. koi baat nahi agar beech mei halka halka saalan ka taste bhi aa jata hai tou

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

i have an organic chemistry joke but im afraid i'll fail at it

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 months

will never forget this one time outside jinnah hospital an ambulance was stuck in traffic but no one was giving way (agar koi jaga deta bhi to someone else would stick their car in to get ahead). they had to take the patient out on a stretcher in the middle of the road to rush in

Javaria Waseem

@JavariaWaseem

5 months

There's a special place in hell for people who tail an ambulance to get out of traffic and then take over the emergency space created by others for the ambulance to pass just so they can save their time.

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@ZaphodGigglebox

1 year

yes, quite a statement. it's no surprise - a country which shamelessly masterminded a ruthless holocaust, now 9 decades later has learned nothing and is again stubbornly backing an apartheid regime. time will tell and i hope this haunts the germans as much as the holocaust does

ian bremmer

@ianbremmer

1 year

brandenburg gate, berlin right now quite a statement from the german government

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

not afraid to admit that i teared up earlier today after reading about oxford's vaccine results. safe, affordable, effective, and primarily catering to the developing world. a moment of triumph for humanity

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 months

uncle and aunty at punjabi store are so nice 😭😭😭♥️♥️♥️ they also let me have the hari mirchein for free, "betiya ji yeh aap ke liye gift hai" 😭🙏

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@ZaphodGigglebox

2 years

so happy to see you at yet another jacobs meet-up in munich, looks so fun 👍 unfollowed+blocked

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@ZaphodGigglebox

3 months

bohot koshish karti hun ke mera rona nah nikle phir bhi nikal jata hai

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

friendly reminder that corporations like pfizer and GSK have repeatedly denied life saving prevention to millions of at-risk or afflicted people around the world by refusing to lower the costs of drugs or vaccines for the developing world or humanitarian organizations

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

"you changed" bro i took advanced organic chemistry in college

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

a mutual from alevels got outed by a friend for having harassed her. the girls whatsapp group with my friends showed nothing but tremendous support & character tonight. the amount of strength, wisdom, dignity, love,& kindness women are capable of is beyond any man's understanding

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@ZaphodGigglebox

3 years

im so dumb a friend posted a picasso painting and i asked him "did you make it?" 😂😭😭 theres no way to undo the shame

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

it's been ages since the sun was last out and the weather app says it'll be seen again on december 25. the last molecule of serotonin has decomposed itself after hearing this news

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@ZaphodGigglebox

3 years

amma asked brother where he is to check up on him and this was his reply 🤦🏽‍♀️😭😭

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@ZaphodGigglebox

2 years

amma went inside greeted neighbour and said "sobia baji aap nei (kaam ke liye) choti bachi rakh li hai?" and the neighbour went "haww zahra, woh tou aapki beyti hai!!!" 😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 it was honestly wild, ill never get over the fact that that happened 🤣

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@ZaphodGigglebox

5 months

one of the most heartbreaking things in life is witnessing your elders go from offering namaz on a prayer mat to sitting on a chair for namaz as they age

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@ZaphodGigglebox

7 months

i was born in the right generation i love coming on twitter and hating on men 🥰 if it were the 1600s i wouldve been burnt at the stake in a public square by now

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

kept searching for my moms facebook account by typing "amma" in the search bar for two whole minutes and kept wondering why she wasnt showing up 😂🔫

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@ZaphodGigglebox

2 years

this one time my sister was in dupatta(on her head) and my mom didnt recognise her😭😭😭.neighbours invited for some khatam, amma was late so she told dua kei app chali jao mei baad mei aati hun. when amma got there, dua, with dupatta covering her head, opened front door for amma

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@ZaphodGigglebox

7 months

landlady saw me in the kitchen making kheer to take out for lunch with friends and left a cute note and cherries to take with 😭💖💖💖 will forever and ever and ever be grateful and indebted to all the kindness friends and family and so many people in life always, always show 💖

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@ZaphodGigglebox

2 months

this unemployed friend keeps tweeting reminders for every olympic sport thats about to start😭😭😭

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@ZaphodGigglebox

4 years

and that someone will be your own self! ✨

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