I don’t really stay in touch with Winnie the Pooh anymore. Ever since he went public domain he’s been acting strange. Hitting the “nose honey” a little too hard, if you catch my drift.
Hey Ted, it’s your manager. The network wants you to post something like “Hey everyone, are you caught up on every episode of my show? What was your favorite moment?” Please don’t copy & paste that, and make sure not to include this part in the post like last time.
Now that Ted's got a number 1 show he keeps blowing up my phone with his "big ideas" 🙄
#ted
: The Event Series,
#PokerFace
,
#TheTraitorsUS
, and more are streaming now on Peacock.
The rumors are true, I had my stuffing redistributed to play my younger self. It’s a simple procedure — a guy holds my feet and swings me around. Light sedation, I was home by lunch
Happy Valentine’s Day! Caution: If you give your girlfriend a stuffed bear today, there is no guarantee it will transform into a best friend like me. It’s more likely that she will transform into your ex girlfriend.
A shocking amount of you keep asking “does Ted poop?” Can nobody find joy in the great mysteries of the universe anymore? Is there not beauty in the unknown?