SofaRacer @SofaRacer Twitter profile

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

3rd. On a Honda. Next Honda, 18th. Be afraid. Be very, very, afraid.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

Amidst all the inevitable opprobrium being, rightly or wrongly, heaped upon Taka,we should perhaps take a moment to reflect on the fact that the dude head-butted a Ducati rear wheel in a MotoGP Race and lived to tell the tale.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 month

Dear Ducati, Could you not just give him a a full Factory GP25 and let him stay at Gresini next year? Because we’re Loving this story. Yours Sincerely Everybody

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 years

MotoGP pic of the year, no contest.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

Most of the time, they are nothing like us. But sometimes, just sometimes, they are exactly like us. Even when it is absolutely the right thing to do, leaving your Friends behind is never easy.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

17 days

Sprint : Pecco - “I saw Jorge had crashed” Enea - “I saw Marc was struggling” Bez - “I saw God”

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1K

SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

In Racing as in Life, you don’t have to win to be Happy. Be more Valentino.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

That is *not* what Valentino looked like after his first Exit.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

Disqualify them. Every. Single. One. No Race for you. Tell them to Fuck off. Off. You. Fuck. They NEED to do this, because it is going to happen. And a Kid will be splattered all over the TV Screen.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

10 days

Hey Pedro! How would you rate your performance today?

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978

SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 month

PLEASE let it be Valentino doing the Trophies.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 month

“Riders are now allowed to swap Bikes” Expect Fabio to come in for a Ducati.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 months

Everything else aside, that was one of the best performances of Marc Márquez’ life. He’s some man for one man.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 months

Boo Marc Márquez at Mugello if you want. But remember, it just makes him go even harder tomorrow.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Dear Valentino, It is difficult for me to write this You have had a long & illustrious career But today you qualified 21st on the Grid This is not what you, me, or the fans want I need you to make what I understand will be a very difficult decision tonight JUMP THE START!

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

Did they paint Sylvain’s house or something?

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833

SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

If Márquez ever gets a Bike that works the rest of them are fucked.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 months

*ring ring* *ring ring* - Hello? - Hi Boss. Can I bring my new Team Mate to the Ranch? - NO!

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 months

Liberty Media paid a lot of money to own MotoGP. Marc Márquez just owned MotoGP and got paid for it.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

BREAKING: MÁRQUEZ TO RACE GRESINI DUCATI AT MANDALIKA! In a hastily released late night Press Release as the Paddock left Motegi, Gresini Team Boss Nadia Padovani has personally confirmed the News that from Thailand to the end of the Season, Alex Márquez will ride for the Team.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 month

Last Weekend Pecco Bagnaia threw it away for nothing. This Weekend Jorge Martín threw it away for nothing. It’s like watching the World Championship of Stupid.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

6 years

True story : Lad came off his bike, severe trauma. Later, he thanked the Doc for saving his life. Doc - “Don’t thank me, thank the people who prepped you on the scene, they saved your life, not me.” MASSIVE shout out to the people in the red overalls who attended Tito Rabat.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Can’t wait to see Jorge on Oprah.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 months

*ring ring* *ring ring* - Hello? - Hi Lin - Hi Gigi, what’s up? - Remember when Lorenzo & Rossi were in the Team and you had to put a wall up in the Box? - I remember it only too well - Where did you get it, and do they do them in Red?

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

The Pressure Is On : Jack Miller - I need to win more races, or Ducati will go mental. Alex Rins - I need to finish more races, or Suzuki will go mental. Pedro Acosta - I need to tidy my room, or Mum will go mental.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

When Two Worlds Collide : All of India - Who is the Guy on the Motorbike? Everybody else - Who is the Guy in the Sidecar?

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Dear @MugelloCircuit We don’t care what you have to do We don’t care about the cost (we will pay huge €) We don’t care if you have to quarantine the whole Paddock for 3 months But we want to see a MotoGP race at Mugello And we want to see Valentino win it Yours Everybody

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

You only catch Jorge Martín if Jorge Martín wants to get caught.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

Gresini Nothing since 2006, and that was with Saturday Night Specials Pedrosa didn’t want Last year, the big guy went the garage in the sky Today, on equal terms, they Aced the lot of them The moral of the story? If you want to get ahead, put a girl in charge Chapeau, Nadia

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

For Voicemail, Dial 901 : Gigi it’s Pecco. Call me back please Gigi it’s Luca. Call me back please Gigi it’s Jorge. Call me back please Gigi it’s Bez. Call me back please Gigi it’s Digi. Call me back please Gigi it’s Enea. Call me back please It’s Vale. You are dead to me.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

Valentino was on the podium at one point. I had my cock half out…

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

There has been a lot of talk, too much talk, about Marc Márquez’ age. He is only 30. MotoGP is currently obsessed with Youth. People forget the reason why MotoGP is obsessed with Youth. The reason MotoGP is obsessed with Youth is “Marc Márquez”. He has plenty of time.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

6 years

FOR SALE : Satellite Yamaha MotoGP bike. Bought for 2019 season. Change of circumstance, now surplus to requirements. Offers. Contact : J Lorenzo 99 Main Street Bologna

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

The level of talent in MotoGP now is incredible. There has never, ever, been a time when there was so much strength in so much depth. Stop reading articles about ‘back in the day’. There is no ‘back in the day’ anymore. The time is now. And it is joyous to behold.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

There is photobombing There is “This isn’t just any photobombing, this is M&S Photobombing” Enter, Cal Crutchlow “Out the way. Where’s Jack?” World Level.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

Dateline Gresini : Nadia Padovani meets her new Rider. “Bring the Spanish boy to me”

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Dear Jorge, Remember that time you won that race & jumped in the lake? Shit cool! But here’s the thing You’re turning into that old guy who sits in the corner of the Bar watching Sport on TV telling anyone who will listen that you used to be somebody Don’t be that guy, Jorge

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

No need whatsoever to show a distressed Girlfriend.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 months

Ducati will send out a Press Release this evening which will explain everything. As soon as the wording is agreed with Factory Team Principal, Marc Márquez.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Lots of people wise after the event. But you don’t have a save like that and then ride through the field like that, then settle for third. These people are just not made that way. That’s why they are on the track, and you are on the couch.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 months

How Fucking forced is that smile?

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 years

Somewhere in Japan, there’s an engineer crying his eyes out. “My beautiful swing arm. Look what he did to my beautiful swing arm!”

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 years

Dear Santa, Haven’t written to you in years, scusate il ritardo. I have been good (mostly) You’ll be dead busy, what with all the kids and stuff But if you could let me see Valentino Rossi win at Mugello just one more time, that would be the bestest present ever Yours Sofa

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

16 days

Say what you like, but Jorge Martín had that shit rolling again a Second and a Half after he dropped it. The Bike didn’t have time to catch its breath. ‘SofaRacer Approved’

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

This is no criticism of the Marshals whatsover, because Marshals are absolutely awesome. But that Green Flag has to be one of the most wildly optimistic things I’ve seen in my entire life.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

Fuck sake Fuck me No fucking way I’m fucking fucked I don’t fucking believe this Fuckity fuckity fuckity fuck The Ducati MotoGP Riders WhatsApp group is ON FIRE tonight.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

‘Do you want to buy a secondhand Hypercar and a really cool jacket?’ ‘No thanks’

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

Alex Rins not only held off the onslaught of 8 Ducatis, he also beat Marc Márquez in a last lap shootout at Phillip Island No Rider in history has done that If he doesn’t get arrested for being drunk and disorderly tonight, there’s something wrong with him ‘SofaRacer Approved’

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

7 months

“He’s got some fucking balls” - Cal Crutchlow “He can Win in his Rookie year” - Marc Márquez “He knows where he’s heading” - Dani Pedrosa “I get a stiffy just thinking about it” - SofaRacer And here’s the Lad himself, not exactly looking overwhelmed. ¡Vamos!

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Yesterday, the Ducati coffee machine broke down. This morning, the lead Factory rider quit. Always knew Italians were serious about coffee, but WOW!

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572

SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Márquez taking the time he needs to heal before returning to MotoGP is really smart. He’s 27 & has raced in GP’s since he was 15. Missing a year now to rest & fully recuperate could lengthen his career considerably A big decision, but easier to make if you’re on a 4 year deal...

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 months

Bike changes. Team changes. Manufacturer changes. Nothing new, Riders conduct them all the time. This is different. What Marc Márquez has conducted, is a Coup d'état.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

Today’s MotoGP Podium : Factory Ducati Factory Ducati Two year old scrapper Some Manufacturers have got some serious thinking to do.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

HRC have learned the hard way it’s best to get a photo of the 2nd Repsol Rider before the Season starts, while he’s still smiling.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

Danilo i cried into my pillow when you left i was bereft then heard from afar a stage win in dakar next to the states to eat food off big plates i said yikes he will love superbikes now a call from livio (the new davide brivio) to do the thai race because you are ace

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

Night night, Danilo Look at you! Doing the Dakar, and winning a stage as a Rookie. Seriously impressed. Complementi! Love Everybody x. @Petrux9

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

7 months

8th to 2nd in his second Round on a year old Bike. Difficult to see how Marc Márquez comes back from this.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

6 months

There may be a Billion alternative Parc Ferme’s in a Billion alternative Universes. And in none of them is Valentino congratulating Marc.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

A simple guide to MotoGP Data : 1 or 2? If Marc Márquez has one functioning arm, he has a big problem. If Marc Márquez has two functioning arms, the rest of the grid has a big problem.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

6 months

“You cannot imagine how much I enjoyed overtaking the boys” I am in Love with Pedro Acosta and I don’t care who knows. The Boys! THE BOYS!

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Rule Change : Any Moto3 Rider not pulling a stand-up wheelie out of Pitlane in FP1 at Qatar is automatically docked 50 Points for bringing the class into disrepute. No appeals.

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557

SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 months

Was really Cool to see Johann Zarco throwing his Gloves, Knee Sliders etc into the Grandstand for the adoring Crowd at the end. What they didn’t show on Television however, was Joan Mir being physically restrained in the Box from throwing his Bike into the Crowd.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

Factory Updates, Assen : Aprilia - Ride Height device, for improved reliability KTM - Aero Package, for better stability Honda - White Towel, for throwing in

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

Crutchlow needs to dial it back a bit. If he’s not careful, they’ll give him a Factory Ride.

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555

SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

Digi stays. Justice has been done.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

In other news, Dani Pedrosa is the best test rider on the planet.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

He gained fuck all, shove your fucking Track Limits up your fucking arse.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

Dear Toprak, Oh, fuck off! Yours The Ordinary People

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

It’s really come to something when Marc Márquez, yes Marc Márquez, is rolling out of it at the Sachsenring, yes the Sachsenring, because to push for more than 7th, yes 7th, was too big a risk The worst of it being, that was a smart decision We’re being robbed of his best years.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

They should rescind his Title, just for this. It’s the only Language these people understand.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

MotoGP Winter Development Plans : Ducati - Get Riders to stop Crying when reading Marc’s Data KTM - 3D Print a Marc Márquez that looks like Jack Miller Aprilia - Buy Process Flow Chart off Amazon and fill in Yamaha - Offer Fabio €100m to stay Honda - Downsize Trophy Cabinet

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 years

If your Dad wasn’t your Dad and you needed somebody to be your substitute Dad...

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Sam Lowes isn’t a better rider than he used to be. Sam Lowes isn’t a faster rider than he used to be. Sam Lowes isn’t a better racer than he used to be. He was always this good. Sometimes, confidence is everything.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

First Presidential debate : Neither candidate mentioned anything about redeveloping Laguna Seca to get MotoGP back, thus giving America something to be proud of again. Disappointing.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

If Jorge Martín wants to down in History as the first Rider to Win a Title on a Satellite Bike, he might want to think about getting on with that.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

7 years

What Tech 3 should have done; 1. Sign M Dunlop 2. Tell M Dunlop ‘That Italian lad on the 46 bike says you’re fat’ 3. Collect World Championship

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Johann Zarco now needs to be really careful. Any more results like that, Ducati will give him a GP20 and that’ll be his career fucked again.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

Ladies and Gentlemen, A Star is born.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

Know nothing about Football, but guessing Ronaldo doesn’t play anymore?

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

How was Valentino so fast today? Because he’s really fucking good on a bike.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

10 months

Trackhouse Racing bringing the NASCAR vibe to MotoGP be like

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

*ring ring* *ring ring* Hello? Hi Nadia, it’s Alex What’s up? I’ve just had 3 boxes of Gresini Team clothing delivered, and it’s all a size too small for me. Check your phone, Alex…

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

He’s nearly fucking 60!

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

“Why would they do that? I’m beginning to think they might not want me back. That can’t be right”

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

This ‘Toprak’ character in the Superbikes. Celebrating a Race Win with a Rolling Stoppie. Have you ever seen the like? The FIM need to conduct an urgent investigation into this kind of behaviour. With a view to making it compulsory. ‘SofaRacer Approved’

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

2 years

Should Márquez appeal the amended Penalty? Yes he should. And every Rider & Team should back him. The Stewards cannot be allowed to retrospectively alter a Penalty in a rearguard action purely designed to cover for their own inadequacies. It’s nonsense on stilts.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

It’s not often at the end of a days racing that Moto3 was the most sensible thing you saw.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 years

Will never forget how, as a relatively young man, Jorge Lorenzo conducted himself with incredible dignity, showing respect and humility, as he entered the lions den in Italy and attended the funeral of Marco Simoncelli. The mark of a true Champion.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

7 months

“We need to improve in many areas” - Pedro Acosta “Oh Fuck” - Rest of the Grid

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

6 years

Tonight at Aragon : Jorge Lorenzo - Checking lap times. Marc Márquez - Checking sector times. Valentino Rossi - Checking flight times.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

11 months

“Theres smoke coming from the Gresini Ducati” Yeah, because Digi is ON FIRE!

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Not saying KTM have come a long way in a short period of time or anything. But if they decide on Monday morning to start building electric cars and Space Rockets, Elon Musk is bankrupt in 5 years.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 month

You know Marc is back when the Commentator is saying “This isn’t as convincing as his Win last Weekend at Aragon”.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

Strategies for Austria: KTM - This is our Home Race. Make it our Fortress. Ride like Hell and get the Win. Ducati - If you can Win, do so. If not just take the Points, we’ve got this. Honda - Do 6 Laps, see how it feels. If you need to come into the Pits for a hug, it’s fine.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

6 years

Andrea Iannone has strenuously denied that he crashed on the slowing down lap after receiving a dashboard text message saying he’d sold a bottle of Amber & Musk.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

1 year

Uttar Pradesh? Utter Success! Hey India, think we fell a little bit in Love with you this Weekend. ‘SofaRacer Approved’ Sleep well…

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

5 months

Saturday : 13th to 2nd “It will be much more difficult to do this tomorrow” Sunday : 13th to 2nd Dear Marc, Fool us Once, shame on you. Fool us Twice, shame on us. Also, please feel free to shame us again. Repeatedly.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 months

This is why a Factory Ride is so important. Satellite Riders have to share a Yacht. It’s the Racing equivalent of poverty.

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

4 years

Via @denkmit ‘Viñales said Cal’s presence gave the riders peace of mind that they could rely on him to make decisions’ Translation : We’re too terrified of him to question what he says, so we just ride the bike as hard as we can & hope we don’t disappoint him. It seems to work

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SofaRacer

@SofaRacer

3 years

How bad is the ‘Viñales situation’? To give you an idea of the scale of the issue; Maverick Viñales was hired years ago by Yamaha to replace Valentino Rossi. Maverick no longer rides a Yamaha. Valentino still does.

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