People are blaming Daenerys Targaryen for losing it, after she lost 2 Grown Dragons...
John Wick lost just 1 fvcking dog...Just 1...
E no allow us rest...Part 1, 2 and 3
If John Wick lost a Dragon, he will probably outdo Hitler..😢
Eventually Nigerians will return to the days of “Trade by Barter” by the time Meffy is done experimenting all the economic ideas that form in his head while in the bathroom.
“I don’t have cash, I’ve passed my weekly limit, let me give you 5 tubers of yam for this your dress”
You become what you criticise!!!!
.
Linda Ikeji Criticised baby mamas, she became one..
.
Mourinho called Wenger specialist in failure, he is becoming one...
.
Now I will stop criticising Buhari...
And start criticising Dangote...
Imagine laughing at Seyi UBA for earning 80k.🤣
Only in Lagos tho😭
With 80k per month in Ibadan, you are a big boy.
With 80k in Ijebu, them go talk say nah Yahoo.
With 80k in Osun State, you go dey use escort 😭
With 80k in Kogi, nah you and Yahaya Bello dey run things.
If an average American is not a Mass Shooter, then Me, an Average Nigerian is not a Fraudster..
If an average white American Male is not a mass shooter, an average IGBO Male is not a Fraudster..
For every 80 Nigerians arrested for Fraud by the FBI, I can Name 100 doing Good.
🙂
Nick Cannon may be adding another baby to his brood ... at least that sure the way it looks, because there was big gender reveal party which appears to have been hosted by Nick and Bre Tiesi.
If Buhari should win this election,
The only person I pity is not even Nigerians.
.
.
It is Canadians...Cos the way Nigerians will run to Canada after elections, that country no go fit hold all of us.😂😂
She's 19 ?
Exactly why she should quickly go to jail, do a couple years and come out..
She can even still do 10 years and still make it in time for NYSC...
Elewe-eran prison in Abeokuta preferably cos Cynthia and the Tega babes are Goats.
Wizkid fans are going to have a wankfest this week cos Drake brought out wizzy😪
.
The Sad part is Messi fans will begin their own Wankfest tomorrow after Messi finally cripples Chris Smalling.😭
.
The worse part is Game of throne fans will start their own wankfest in 5 days.
😪
Hey CNN,
My country Nigeria just mounted a giant Broom in Abuja, please help us tell tourists to come and see..
.
We also have Mugabe's statue in IMO.
Our customers are on your TL 🙏🙏
Dear Twitter people,
My dad has a Hotel in Ijebu-ode, Ogun state, The Name is Rolak Hotel And Suite.
.
kindly help RT.
Someone on your TL might be passing through...
A thread in case you dont believe in true comfort👇
Thanks
Dear Twitter people,
My dad has an Hotel in Ijebu-ode, Ogun state, The Name is Rolak Hotel And Suite.
Sales can get better. kindly help RT.
Someone on your TL might be passing through... Thanks.
Chill Y'all...
Now that Dany is Dead, is everyone just gonna let a Dragon suffering from Heartbreak slip into depression?
.
Why not give the Drogon a new life purpose.
They could Make Drogon the first commercial Airline of the 7 kingdoms.
Jon Snow as the Pilot.
#GameOfThrones
I appreciate Nigeria scoring more than just 1 goal against South Africa.
First one For MTN charging 32k for Sims back then.
Second one for Dstv repeating same movies 2 billion times a year.
#NGARSA
Hazard will soon realise Real Madrid fans arent patient....
They booed Ronaldo...arguably the greatest player to play for them.
Chelsea fans might appreciate Take-ons and Twerk videos....but Madrid fans only want goals.🤷🏽♂️
#PSGRMA
Whether you agree or not:
•Rashford is just Welbeck that won't be sold to Arsenal
•Martial might never outdo Nani
•Lukaku moves like a bullion van
•Pogba might never reach the height of Lampard, Scholes &Gerrard
•Man utd is an average team
• Mourinho was right🤷🏼♂️
#BARMUN
Dear Twitter,
My Dad has a hotel in Ijebu-Ode, Ogun state.
Name is "Rolak Hotel and Suites".
.
Twitter Promotion has been my only contribution.
.
Kindly Help Retweet, people might be passing through..🤗
Vector was dropping ss2 punchlines...
What M.I did on the
#TheViper
was guidance and counseling 🔥🔥🔥
Once M.I drops that coin in the beginning of a song, you just know he is about to put on his crown again.
Hey Twitter;
It doesn't always have to be Lagos or Abuja...😩
My Dad's Hotel;
"Rolak Hotel and Suites"
Ijebu-Ode, Ogun state.
Customers , Business contractors and potential employees are on your Timeline...👇
.
Please help Retweet and Repost.🙏🤲
Pep Guardiola and Zidane...when they realize they now both have to win a champions league trophy without Messi or Ronaldo..
#UCLdraw
Real Madrid v Man City
As a commentator my job is to comment. In questioning the times of 28 athletes (not 1 athlete) by wondering if the timing system malfunctioned, I was attacked, accused of racism, and of questioning the talent of an athlete I respect and predicted to win. Unacceptable. I move on.
Love how Buharists went from:
.
Segalink is a fraud
Segalink is a frau
Segalink is a fra
Segalink is a fr
Segalink is a f
Segalink is a
Segalink is
Segalink i
Segalink
Segalink abeg, I have just been arrested, help us
#EndSARS
Segalink abeg, help us
#EndPolicebrutality
Lmaooooooooo.
When I wrote this last ICAN exam....
After the Second Paper, I came out and said I can Only Pass that Paper If God himself marked my script...
This is June & I have cleared ICAN😩
Economist✔
Chartered Accountant ✔
I go just dey drop business thread.😂
In
#GameofThrones
,different houses, wildlings,Dothraki & all, United to defeat the Night King.
.
In
#Avengers
, different superheroes United to defeat Thanos.
But in Nigeria, We begged Fela Durotoye, Moghalu and Sowore to unite & defeat our Night King,
.
Dem no gree.
Awon Cersei.
#Falz
#Talk
just
dragged Muric 😂
dragged Buhari.😂
dragged your favourite pastors😂
.
If there's any artist challenging authority as Fela did, then its Falz.
.
No be to dey smoke weed and dey raise hands up go make you next Fela.
Champions league Album Track list:
•UEFA -Cold Balls, Hot Balls
•Ronaldo -One More Time
•Messi- Coming back to Camp Nou
•Lukaku ft Sanchez - Look at me now
•Chelsea - Just Visiting
•Man Utd ft Arsenal- Not Jealous
•Man City ft PSG- Money can't buy it all.
#UCLdraw
The Moral Lesson from this Northern Blockade is...
If Northern Nigeria was the one with Crude Oil... They would have seceded from Nigeria the Night of Independence Day...
Messi this...
Ronaldo that...
Why arent people even talking about Saido Mane?
Epl highest goal scorer.
UCL winner.
Still active in the AFCON.
Is everyone trying to be mischievous?😐
With Messi out of Copa America, Salah out of AFCON, Van Dijk Nations League runner-up and Ronaldo Nations League champion, who is now your favourite to win the Ballon d'Or? 🤔
Arewa Twitter and their takes on topics is pure entertainment....😂
Every time they trend, you start to understand why they give them very low cut off for exams....
Twitter should start putting the Handicapped sign on their tweets....
I'd really appreciate if Davido really takes the matter up and those girls end up in Jail.
Stats from the Nigeria Prison Service shows that of the total 74,081 people in Naija prisons...
98.08% are men.
Only 1.92% are female.
For the promotion of gender equality, lock em up.🙏
If no be for Mandela wey we just dey respect...
We for done beat South Africa pass that self🙃😒....
If you like tell MTN to increase price of Data🙄
#NGARSA
I think it's a good thing that Buhari has Dangote and Otedola on his campaign team..
.
It will make sending him back to Daura a bit easier.
.
Dangote Truck to pack his load, Otedola Forte Oil to fuel the truck.
When Ronaldo retires from playing for Portugal...
The number 7 Jersey should be retired...
In short, wearing a number 7 Portuguese Jersey in Portugal (even for non-footballers) should be made a criminal offence.
What Mourinho is doing with Dele Alli is what he wanted to do with Anthony Martial.
But if Jose dare looks at Martial, he'd frown his face like a tax collector...
Then his Nursery school followers will write to the International criminal court.
Lmao, they told you Twitter is about Savagery.
.
People are making money, getting married, getting employment through Twitter, but you are chasing Savagery.
.
Well done, Conan the Barbarian.😪
If the Allegations by Busola Dakolo, Timi Dakolo's wife should be taken up and Proven to be true,
The Coza Pastor should be Castrated and thrown in Jail....
Anyone that Says "Touch not my anointed", should also be thrown into Jail for at least 10 years with Hard labour.
Anthony Joshua took a picture with Drake...
And even boasted he will break the Drake curse...
He just got defeated by Andy Ruiz Jnr.😢😢
Only one man can break the Drake curse...
He is....
I sincerely hope the Busola Dakolo Allegations against Pastor Biodun of Coza leads to well structured
#MeToo
movement in religious side....both Pastors and Catholic Priests.
My take:
Do not let your faith in God stop you from seeing the flaws in your religion.
Mourinho & Tottenham were 2 goals down...
Tweaked the game ...and is now 2 goals up..
You think Mourinho is here to sell beans?
You better delete that nonse you have in your draft..
Before Twitter suspends your account.
#TOTOLY
Dear Twitter people,
My dad has a Hotel in Ijebu-ode, Ogun state, The Name is Rolak Hotel And Suite.
Sales can get better. kindly help RT.
Someone on your TL might be passing through... Thanks.😊
Dear Twitter people please..😭
I am here again...
My dad has an Hotel in Ijebu-ode, Ogun state, The Name is Rolak Hotel And Suite.
Sales can get better. kindly help RT this thread.😢😭
Someone on your TL might be passing through... Thanks.
Kendrick:
Kendrick:
Kendrick: *Coughs* on a beat.
Genius lyrics: with this Poetic act, Kendrick tries to reenact the discomfort felt by Black young men as a result racial discrimination just as Malcom x did in 1955.
What Arsenal is trying to tell Manchester United is that:
" No matter how fast the Anus runs, it will always be behind"
-Pete Edochie (1945).
🚶♂️🚶♂️
#ARSMUN
Elisha Abbo never even spend 3 months for Senate, baba done dey shop for sex toy..😂
If Baba ever rise to become Senate president, he will use the Mace as a giant dildo..
Senator Johnny Sins with Sprinkle of Bash Alli...😩😩
Everyweek
People's Gazette releases groundbreaking Exclusives with documentations to back them.
But Nigerians are numb. This kinda Information is useless in the hands of people who have lost the will to fight, but they still provide them anyways
100% respect to them.
You see Arewa Twitter take on issues....
And you begin to understand why it is easy for Boko Haram to recruit...
If the educated ones have opinions like this...
What will the ones on the street now do..😩
Oluwa shine your light on them..biko. 🙏
My uncle was planning on moving to Canada with his whole family but as I have now shown him this your tweet he has changed his mind and decided to remain in Nigeria and pay cheaper electricity bill. Thanks.
I understand the fears of the African Americans and South Africans and why they treat us different too🤣
Trust me, no one wants to compete with a Nigerian with equal opportunities...
They'd outperform you...
We resilient bastards..
Make una no vex..🙏🙏🙏🤣
Zidane and Real Madrid swapping Courtois for Navas feels like when you swap your Samsung Note 8 that functions perfectly for iPhone 6 with broken screen just cos you want Twitter for iPhone..😩😩
#PSGRMA
Never seen social Media so connected to a family's pain...
.
Everyone wanted to be involved in the search...
.
Everyone shared in the hope that she'd be found alive...
.
But sometimes, hope can't hold the hands of death.
Rest in Peace Adewura.🙏
As Samuel Eto once implied,
Pep Guardiola does know how to Twerk for the Media..😂
.
I cant imagine how Jose Mourinho talking to Rashford after a game like this would have been painted...
.
The media decides for the fans who to love and who to hate..❤
This sums Pep Guardiola up 😳
Raheem Sterling has just scored a hat-trick in a 6-0 FA Cup Final win to complete a domestic treble...
And he still gets a passionate lecture from his boss. Relentless pursuit of excellence.
See,
If you want to vote Kingsley Moghalu, or Fela Durotoye or Madam Oby, vote for them.👍
.
.
But if your wishful thinking swings the pendulum in Buhari's favour and we end up with 4 years of this nonsense.
.
If you try to run to Canada, they will deport you to Zamfara.
.
😒😒
It’s not like Wole Soyinka was in his Early 30s when he protested against Goodluck Jonathan...
Only difference now is Wole Soyinka has realized the things he did and said against Jonathan, if he tries it with Buhari, he will be writing his next book in a DSS safe deposit box.
Lmao...🤣😂
Coza and Biodun Fatoyinbo shouldnt be using Davido, Wizkid and Tiwa to promote their event...
If they need someone to promote their program, they should link up with RKelly or Bill Cosby...
Zero Consent, a thousand victims..
Your MCM Buhari just changed the Chief Justice of Nigeria Onnoghen like someone that's changing Sim Card from sim 1 to Sim 2.
.
.
The fact that Buhari still has supporters shows that if some people ever get back into the Garden of Eden, they will still eat the forbidden fruit 😪
If you attended a boarding school.
You will understand the logistical nightmare of moving 300+ boys.
Talk less of doing it against their will.
Even If you use lorries to move them....you talking 5-8+ lorries.
So its very troubling that "Bandits" have the resources to do that.
Vector dragging Jesse Jagz into all these might not end well for him..
You people are pushing Lanre oh..🤣😂
Jagz is not M.I, Jagz will change it for him.😂🤣
#JudasTheRat
#pastorsSon
"It is Because Messi isnt playing:
" it is Because Valverde isn't using this formation"
"I know Barcelona spent lots of money on Griezmann, Dembele and Coutinho but"
#AthleticBarca
Football Twitter:
Premier league fans: La Liga is a farmer's league..Messi should come to the premier league😂
Messi All the way from Spain this UCL:
Tottenham: 2 goals for you.
Manchester United: 2 goals for you
Liverpool: 2 goals for you too.
In short 2 goals for everyone of you here.
#BARLIV
To my future Children...
Before you turn 15, even if I have to force you, you must learn
• An extra language aside English & Yoruba (most likely French or Chinese or even Arabic)
• Learn at least 1 musical instrument.
• Practice a particular sport.
• Start a business.
Everytime Messi fans make jokes about Ronaldo, something bad happens to Barcelona and Messi..😂
.
Laughed at Ronaldo's Juventus losing to Ajax, Liverpool whooped them 4 goals.
.
Laughed at Ronaldo not winning the European Golden boot, Valencia whooped them to
#CopaDelRey
Using Exchange rate of 360Naira to $1,
.
This $470 Earring =
#169200
Naira.
.
Minimum wage of
#30
,000 Naira means
A Nigerian Worker has to work:
5months & 19days to afford this.
Minimum wage of
#18
,000 Naira means
A Nigerian worker has to work:
9months & 12days to afford this.
Ambode should have collected Past Questions from Saraki..😩.
.
"How to deal with impeachment threat from your Party"
.
Ambode is about to Join the Millions of Nigerians to lose their Job under Buhari's regime...😪
.
Next Level Impeachment..😨🙌
Here is a theory.
I think Air peace WILL crack travel from Nigeria to US & Canada for cheaper & with far less flight time than currently available alternatives
And I think they are already working on this.
How?
About 9 months ago they announced direct flights to Antigua.
1/5
Anytime I enter public transport....
I just smile and greet everyone....God forbid there are kidnappers in there...
Maybe Dem fit reason say " This one get respect, make we free am"🤔🤔
For me,
#TheViper
wins...
Vector's
#JudasTheRat
didnt just have that touch or flow M.I's diss had..
Vector honestly sounded like someone clutching at straws...
😪
E for Effort.
"How the Flawed Nigeria Education System contributes to Unemployment"
.
.
A thread.
.
In my final year in Uni, (Economics)
We were asked to choose project topics,
I submitted " The effect of human psychology on effectiveness of Economic policies"
.
My supervisor, threw away the
In Nigeria, you are just 1 wrong move from a bullet.
.
.
You dont even need to:
Be a Yahoo boy,
Snatch Ballot box
Keep dreads
Keep beards
Be a thief.
.
.
The bullet could easily come find you.
#EndSARS
Fear Not, Ye Men of Criminal Intent.
Thy supreme defender of Yahoo Yahoo.
Sir Naira Marley shall plead thy cause.
Whilst others of thy kind, shall create a go-fund-me to finance thy case.
Thy Chief Entertainer, Sir Zlatan Ibile shall provide music that comforts thy.
Fear Not.
Another 9 Nigerians again arrested in US for wire fraud.
1. Seun Adelekan
2. Lekan Daramola
3. Solomon Aburekhanlen
4. Gbenga Oyeneyin
5. Abiola Olajumoke
6.Temitope Omotayo
7. Bryan Eadie
8. Albert Lucas
9. Demola Adebogun
Buhari's government closed borders to allow local businesses compete...(according Buharists)
.
Then the same government wants to collaborate with Hyundai to compete against Innoson.
This government isnt just clueless, it is wicked.
Today the President/CEO of Hyundai Engineering Company Limited visited, and put forward a proposal to set up a vehicle manufacturing plant in the country. I pledged the full collaboration and support of the Federal Government to make this planned investment a reality.
Meanwhile Nigerians, it would be unfair to make jokes about Xenophobia or about AIDS epidemic in South Africa.
There's difference between Banter and straight up disrespect.
#NGARSA
When I saw Kepa trending, I thought Chelsea officially announced him as Sarri's replacement...
Kepa Starting ahead of De Gea....
It is Smalling and Jones, I blame for De Gea facing such embarrassment...😪😪