Noah Grossman 🥑 Profile Banner
Noah Grossman 🥑 Profile
Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

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1,004
Following
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Actor, Comedian, Writer, Host | likes colors | he/him | business contact: noah.a.grossman @gmail .com |

Joined February 2013
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
Not sure when I’ll tell the full story, it’s not super long, but I’m flying home and feel like I should mention it so I don’t forget. My girlfriend and I were almost murdered on a farm by an actual mentally ill man who believed we were witches. Yes like actual hocus pocus.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
Hey, @KeithLeakJr , I’ve got another great baby name: Klorox
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
We can all laugh at Fox News, Ye, and crazy blonde women warning of Jews, spells, and the end times, but that shit gets people killed. If my girlfriend wasn’t smarter I would not be here and she would have to figure out how to drive a car down a mountain to leave the scene.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
9 months
I promise I am not pictured here
@CopperAmerican
COPPER N AMERICAN INDIAN (AKA) NIIJI🐢
9 months
Mugshots of looters arrested by the Portland Police
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
5 SOS looks like a group of malnourished Hot Topic employees.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
I’m laughing about it, but really, I was almost killed because an actual crazy person believes the whack shit spewed by the modern GOP and their supporters. This happened yesterday so I’m still processing how to feel or what to say about it?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Now after having a cat for the first time in life, I understand why there are weird cat people. I honestly would rather talk to you about my cat than almost anything else.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
I’m not exaggerating in the slightest when I tell you this. If this man was not 60+ we both might be dead, or who knows what. I didn’t want to say anything until I knew what to say, but I actually just want to feel better rn so I’m tweeting about it.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
First celebrity I ever got to work with!
@NC_DisneyTVA
No Context Disney TVA
3 years
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
1 year
With all the legitimate points to boycott Harry Potter Legacy due to the authors anti-trans actions and rhetoric, I honestly forget about the evil greedy jew goblin antagonists. Being a Jewish American myself, I am 100% NOT buying this game…
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Officially now an uncle
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
My girlfriend is experiencing INTENSE period pains. Beyond normal - she’s essentially bedridden with pain and throwing up. Any suggestions? Pamprin normally helps but isn’t doing the job. All suggestions welcome!! Thank you.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
Just landed for my connecting flight. Y’all are beyond sweet, thank you. I’ll share the story once it’s a little less fresh and then it’ll be totally fine for us all to laugh at.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
I’ve only ever had threesomes. Jesus is always with me.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Today marks two years with my girlfriend 🥳
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
Thank you black men and women in Georgia! Thank you Pennsylvania. Thank you to Americans whom voted to dismiss this goon!!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
1 year
Guys, I know what’s happening the 29th. I’ve known the whole time. Y’all are hilarious and special and if it turns out I’m wrong, then you guys are weird and not funny at all.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
I married my brother and his wife yesterday
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
Quarter life Panic! at the Disco
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
So my girlfriend will sometimes write down what I say in my sleep, apparently this was last night’s conversation— Me: Round. Her: Round what? Me: Round people. Her: What round people? Me: Yeah, round people, sometimes they fight 3 rounds, sometimes 5.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Smosh fans are mad respectful 🤟🏼 in person and on the internet (mostly)
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Just found out @OliviaSui ‘s boyfriend was the voice of Chowder from Monster House. Monster House! This will be my favorite for a while.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Today is a sad day, for today my Xbox One has died. Just yesterday I was enjoying the remastered borderlands, alas, it has bricked, never to turn on again. @Xbox thank you for your service. Unfortunately I need to some how buy an Xbox One before Borderlands 3. Lotta recycling 😂
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
I have a lady friend! It's been a lil bit, but not too long. I'm a fan 🤘🏼
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Ok since it’s now been publicly announced, I was originally cast as Mario before Chris signed on. I understand why they went with a bigger name, but the performance is going to suffer
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
I hear echoes in my head to this day @supershayne
@smosh
Smosh
4 years
moments that live in my head rent free #15YearsOfSmosh
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Beyond grateful for my Smosh family 😊
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
No, YOU just spent 14 hours straight coloring your hair!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
😩 he chose me ; peace @anthonypadilla , thanks for yo love and trust
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
I’ll eat my own ass!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Seacrest
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
My friends in Los Angeles. Please stay home tonight.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
Mr. And Mrs. MushBags
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
If I was on death row, my final meal would be a singular capri sun, and every time the guard turns their back I’d just blow it back up. Feel free to use this
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
My girlfriend just told me she “doesn’t care” about hash browns. How ridiculous!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
Shayne’s arms look like his legs. @supershayne
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Billie Eilish is what happened after Cara Delevingne and Lil Xan touched bare feet
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
My tag is literally always out I just wanted to post one picture where I’m not a fool
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
1 year
When I’m asleep, I’ll have full conversations with my girlfriend in which I try my hardest to convince her I’m NOT asleep. She asked me last night if I was awake and understanding what she was saying and I said “I understand perfectly” she said okay what did I just say?…
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
😂😂😂
@Co_Mill
courtney
4 years
Can’t get over the fact that this is literally Twitter arresting YouTube and was a complete accidental symbolic masterpiece about the Internet
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
Hello @TheEllenShow ! I’m an LA-based influencer that is raising funds to deliver pizzas and kindness to the people most impacted by the COVID pandemic. Pizza Hut has offered to match pizzas and I’m hoping you can help me spread the word!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
I had some people ask! I was not in @smosh UTM because I was supposed to be in Thailand on a vacation I won on the price is right…however between a family emergency and getting really sick with RSV, I couldn’t leave the country, and also couldn’t be in the show!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
If I smell French toast am I having a French stroke?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
Went to the ER for dehydration because I got too lit at my brothers wedding this weekend. What I learned 🧵
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
I don’t get erections
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
People who are into feet, is somebody with eleven toes like super sexy?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
God is good, most of the time.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
I might not be able to sing, but at least I sound better than Ben Shapiro
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
🥰 thank you
@smosh
Smosh
4 years
Happy birthday to our boy @NoahGrossman214 💕 Please shower him with love, like we do everyday 💦
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
My penis? You mean my beef beam
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
My girlfriend just told me the back of my knees look like the front of my knees. Like, how should I take that?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
1 year
@Co_Mill Court it’s 3am and my foots stuck in the toilet at this Burger King for the last 20 mins. I couldn’t agree more 🥳
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
I’m on that spaghetti energy
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
Can't. Stop. Posting. She. Too. My Baby!!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
Florida can’t be real, they should have safari tours.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
My dog Cooper passed today. I truly feel for everyone who has ever lost a pet. We all loved him very much. Please give your little friends a big hug tonight. 9-09-02 until 3-28-19. I’ll be off here a couple days ♥️
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
Today is my 23rd birthday and I’m celebrating the only way I know how, with a Lt. Dan’s Surf n Turf from @BubbaGumpCo
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
Thanks to the wind and the amazing firefighters the fire has gone back over the hill! My home is looking safe at the moment!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
For your lover.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
I’ve made myself too much soup!!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Noah is my name, but if I was a woman, my name would be Noweewee.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
9 months
@supershayne OD on laced coke in the bathroom of his all boys catholic school
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
I am now known as Miranda Costco
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
Another mass shooting, this time in Thousand Oaks. 12 dead, more injured when a white male in a trench coat opened fire at Borderline Bar. This happened in the valley, MY valley! I’ve got friends who received texts from victims that night! How do we stop this?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Happy Father’s Day To my biological father, Mardy, and my theological father, @SmoshIan 🥰
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
No joke, my hair took 17 hours to finish - legit 15 hours over two days to apply the color 😂 shout out to my girlfriend! Can’t wait to reveal 🤟🏼
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
I’ve been forgetting ever since I can remember.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
In Alabama you can only get married if you’re under 18
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
Just bleached my asshole, what color should I dye it?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
Hey! I’m starting a campaign to feed people experiencing homelessness in Los Angeles, and I need your help! I’m raising money to purchase and personally deliver pizzas to neighbors in need, visit the link in my bio to learn more! You can win free pizza yourself! 🍕🍕
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Instagram took down my baking video for hate speech, nudity, and graphic violence. Glad to know there’s nothing I can do about it!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
AAAAHH MY BROTHER IS GONNE GIT MURRIED
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Yo, my bad, what do you need?
@KeithLeakJr
Keith Leak Jr
6 years
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
I stand by my actions
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
If I ever win the lottery, everyone’s getting a 401k
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Thank you everyone! Heating pad + CBD oil has seemed to calm it enough to let her sleep! Thank you!
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
I still use 😂 in case you wanted to know if I’m cool or not
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Can’t watch a single Studio Ghibli movie without crying at least 3 times. Seriously some of the best story telling, characters, art humanity has ever made. I am in awe consistently.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
Can't hide from the truth. I'm prettier this way. *half way through removing Kimber make up
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
Today's four months 😋
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
How do blind people drive?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
So, did y’all not have soap before? Why’d you have to buy so much?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
Couldn’t have asked for a better life — thanks y’all
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
WOW
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
5 years
We have a time traveler!
@GamesWithBP
Brandon Pero
5 years
@smosh @SmoshIan @supershayne @NoahGrossman214 @Co_Mill @KeithLeakJr @OliviaSui Have you seen the Twitter handle of the person who asked this question in 2016...
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
Big plans coming! You've seen the teases, gotta lot o legal paperwork but you guys are gonna flip when it's complete, my largest goal yet...
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
😂😂😂 I have no comment
@smosh
Smosh
4 years
tired: no simp september inspired: noah simp september
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
I shall now be known as Moist Mayo.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
I’m sorry, like really? My tax dollars are being spent giving cops Captain America tazer shields? What...?
@hunterdemster
Hunter demster
4 years
Shelby County Sherrifs just met us with their new electronic "Tazer" shields. "Operation Legend" Funds funneled by the Trump/Barr adminstration. #ThingsAreNotOk
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
7 years
This doesn't even look like me
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
!!!!!!
@pizzahut
Pizza Hut
4 years
@NoahGrossman214 We'd like to help. Mind sending us a DM?
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
Hey @dominos ! I’m soon to launch a campaign to raise funds to purchase as many pizzas as I can to deliver to people currently experiencing homelessness! I’m hoping you can help me “deliver” kindness to people in need 🍕
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
1 year
Vidcon was so dope!!! Thanks for coming y’all. Always a pleasure meeting and talking with y’all 🤟🏼
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
2 years
Sprained my big toe having just the wildest sex. That piggy went to the market 🐖
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
3 years
Choke on a hamburger!
@realDonaldTrump
Donald J. Trump
4 years
Anarchists, Agitators or Protestors who vandalize or damage our Federal Courthouse in Portland, or any Federal Buildings in any of our Cities or States, will be prosecuted under our recently re-enacted Statues & Monuments Act. MINIMUM TEN YEARS IN PRISON. Don’t do it! @DHSgov
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
4 years
I haven’t pooped since January.
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@NoahGrossman214
Noah Grossman 🥑
6 years
I can barely stomach this
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