Noah Grossman 🥑 @NoahGrossman214 Twitter profile

Last Seen Profiles

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

Not sure when I’ll tell the full story, it’s not super long, but I’m flying home and feel like I should mention it so I don’t forget. My girlfriend and I were almost murdered on a farm by an actual mentally ill man who believed we were witches. Yes like actual hocus pocus.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

Hey, @KeithLeakJr , I’ve got another great baby name: Klorox

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

We can all laugh at Fox News, Ye, and crazy blonde women warning of Jews, spells, and the end times, but that shit gets people killed. If my girlfriend wasn’t smarter I would not be here and she would have to figure out how to drive a car down a mountain to leave the scene.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

9 months

I promise I am not pictured here

COPPER N AMERICAN INDIAN (AKA) NIIJI🐢

@CopperAmerican

9 months

Mugshots of looters arrested by the Portland Police

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

5 SOS looks like a group of malnourished Hot Topic employees.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

I’m laughing about it, but really, I was almost killed because an actual crazy person believes the whack shit spewed by the modern GOP and their supporters. This happened yesterday so I’m still processing how to feel or what to say about it?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Now after having a cat for the first time in life, I understand why there are weird cat people. I honestly would rather talk to you about my cat than almost anything else.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

I’m not exaggerating in the slightest when I tell you this. If this man was not 60+ we both might be dead, or who knows what. I didn’t want to say anything until I knew what to say, but I actually just want to feel better rn so I’m tweeting about it.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

First celebrity I ever got to work with!

No Context Disney TVA

@NC_DisneyTVA

3 years

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

1 year

With all the legitimate points to boycott Harry Potter Legacy due to the authors anti-trans actions and rhetoric, I honestly forget about the evil greedy jew goblin antagonists. Being a Jewish American myself, I am 100% NOT buying this game…

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Officially now an uncle

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

My girlfriend is experiencing INTENSE period pains. Beyond normal - she’s essentially bedridden with pain and throwing up. Any suggestions? Pamprin normally helps but isn’t doing the job. All suggestions welcome!! Thank you.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

Just landed for my connecting flight. Y’all are beyond sweet, thank you. I’ll share the story once it’s a little less fresh and then it’ll be totally fine for us all to laugh at.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

I’ve only ever had threesomes. Jesus is always with me.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Today marks two years with my girlfriend 🥳

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

Thank you black men and women in Georgia! Thank you Pennsylvania. Thank you to Americans whom voted to dismiss this goon!!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

1 year

Guys, I know what’s happening the 29th. I’ve known the whole time. Y’all are hilarious and special and if it turns out I’m wrong, then you guys are weird and not funny at all.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

I married my brother and his wife yesterday

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

Quarter life Panic! at the Disco

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

So my girlfriend will sometimes write down what I say in my sleep, apparently this was last night’s conversation— Me: Round. Her: Round what? Me: Round people. Her: What round people? Me: Yeah, round people, sometimes they fight 3 rounds, sometimes 5.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Smosh fans are mad respectful 🤟🏼 in person and on the internet (mostly)

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Just found out @OliviaSui ‘s boyfriend was the voice of Chowder from Monster House. Monster House! This will be my favorite for a while.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Today is a sad day, for today my Xbox One has died. Just yesterday I was enjoying the remastered borderlands, alas, it has bricked, never to turn on again. @Xbox thank you for your service. Unfortunately I need to some how buy an Xbox One before Borderlands 3. Lotta recycling 😂

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

I have a lady friend! It's been a lil bit, but not too long. I'm a fan 🤘🏼

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Ok since it’s now been publicly announced, I was originally cast as Mario before Chris signed on. I understand why they went with a bigger name, but the performance is going to suffer

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

I hear echoes in my head to this day @supershayne

Smosh

@smosh

4 years

moments that live in my head rent free #15YearsOfSmosh

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Beyond grateful for my Smosh family 😊

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

No, YOU just spent 14 hours straight coloring your hair!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

😩 he chose me ; peace @anthonypadilla , thanks for yo love and trust

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

I’ll eat my own ass!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Seacrest

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

My friends in Los Angeles. Please stay home tonight.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

Mr. And Mrs. MushBags

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

If I was on death row, my final meal would be a singular capri sun, and every time the guard turns their back I’d just blow it back up. Feel free to use this

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

My girlfriend just told me she “doesn’t care” about hash browns. How ridiculous!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

Shayne’s arms look like his legs. @supershayne

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Billie Eilish is what happened after Cara Delevingne and Lil Xan touched bare feet

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

My tag is literally always out I just wanted to post one picture where I’m not a fool

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

1 year

When I’m asleep, I’ll have full conversations with my girlfriend in which I try my hardest to convince her I’m NOT asleep. She asked me last night if I was awake and understanding what she was saying and I said “I understand perfectly” she said okay what did I just say?…

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

😂😂😂

courtney

@Co_Mill

4 years

Can’t get over the fact that this is literally Twitter arresting YouTube and was a complete accidental symbolic masterpiece about the Internet

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

Hello @TheEllenShow ! I’m an LA-based influencer that is raising funds to deliver pizzas and kindness to the people most impacted by the COVID pandemic. Pizza Hut has offered to match pizzas and I’m hoping you can help me spread the word!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

I had some people ask! I was not in @smosh UTM because I was supposed to be in Thailand on a vacation I won on the price is right…however between a family emergency and getting really sick with RSV, I couldn’t leave the country, and also couldn’t be in the show!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

If I smell French toast am I having a French stroke?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

Went to the ER for dehydration because I got too lit at my brothers wedding this weekend. What I learned 🧵

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

I don’t get erections

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

For SpongeBob’s birthday at #Vidcon2019 🎂 @KeithLeakJr @Nickelodeon @SpongeBob

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

People who are into feet, is somebody with eleven toes like super sexy?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

God is good, most of the time.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

I might not be able to sing, but at least I sound better than Ben Shapiro

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

🥰 thank you

Smosh

@smosh

4 years

Happy birthday to our boy @NoahGrossman214 💕 Please shower him with love, like we do everyday 💦

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

My penis? You mean my beef beam

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

My girlfriend just told me the back of my knees look like the front of my knees. Like, how should I take that?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

1 year

@Co_Mill Court it’s 3am and my foots stuck in the toilet at this Burger King for the last 20 mins. I couldn’t agree more 🥳

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

I’m on that spaghetti energy

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

Can't. Stop. Posting. She. Too. My Baby!!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

Florida can’t be real, they should have safari tours.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

My dog Cooper passed today. I truly feel for everyone who has ever lost a pet. We all loved him very much. Please give your little friends a big hug tonight. 9-09-02 until 3-28-19. I’ll be off here a couple days ♥️

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

Today is my 23rd birthday and I’m celebrating the only way I know how, with a Lt. Dan’s Surf n Turf from @BubbaGumpCo —

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

Thanks to the wind and the amazing firefighters the fire has gone back over the hill! My home is looking safe at the moment!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

For your lover.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

I’ve made myself too much soup!!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Noah is my name, but if I was a woman, my name would be Noweewee.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

9 months

@supershayne OD on laced coke in the bathroom of his all boys catholic school

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

I am now known as Miranda Costco

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

Another mass shooting, this time in Thousand Oaks. 12 dead, more injured when a white male in a trench coat opened fire at Borderline Bar. This happened in the valley, MY valley! I’ve got friends who received texts from victims that night! How do we stop this?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Happy Father’s Day To my biological father, Mardy, and my theological father, @SmoshIan 🥰

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

No joke, my hair took 17 hours to finish - legit 15 hours over two days to apply the color 😂 shout out to my girlfriend! Can’t wait to reveal 🤟🏼

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

I’ve been forgetting ever since I can remember.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

In Alabama you can only get married if you’re under 18

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

Just bleached my asshole, what color should I dye it?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

Hey! I’m starting a campaign to feed people experiencing homelessness in Los Angeles, and I need your help! I’m raising money to purchase and personally deliver pizzas to neighbors in need, visit the link in my bio to learn more! You can win free pizza yourself! 🍕🍕

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Instagram took down my baking video for hate speech, nudity, and graphic violence. Glad to know there’s nothing I can do about it!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

AAAAHH MY BROTHER IS GONNE GIT MURRIED

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Yo, my bad, what do you need?

Keith Leak Jr

@KeithLeakJr

6 years

@NoahGrossman214 help

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

I stand by my actions

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

If I ever win the lottery, everyone’s getting a 401k

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Thank you everyone! Heating pad + CBD oil has seemed to calm it enough to let her sleep! Thank you!

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

I still use 😂 in case you wanted to know if I’m cool or not

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Can’t watch a single Studio Ghibli movie without crying at least 3 times. Seriously some of the best story telling, characters, art humanity has ever made. I am in awe consistently.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

Can't hide from the truth. I'm prettier this way. *half way through removing Kimber make up

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

Today's four months 😋

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

How do blind people drive?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

So, did y’all not have soap before? Why’d you have to buy so much?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

Couldn’t have asked for a better life — thanks y’all

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

WOW

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

5 years

We have a time traveler!

Brandon Pero

@GamesWithBP

5 years

@smosh @SmoshIan @supershayne @NoahGrossman214 @Co_Mill @KeithLeakJr @OliviaSui Have you seen the Twitter handle of the person who asked this question in 2016...

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

Big plans coming! You've seen the teases, gotta lot o legal paperwork but you guys are gonna flip when it's complete, my largest goal yet...

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

😂😂😂 I have no comment

Smosh

@smosh

4 years

tired: no simp september inspired: noah simp september

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

I shall now be known as Moist Mayo.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

I’m sorry, like really? My tax dollars are being spent giving cops Captain America tazer shields? What...?

Hunter demster

@hunterdemster

4 years

Shelby County Sherrifs just met us with their new electronic "Tazer" shields. "Operation Legend" Funds funneled by the Trump/Barr adminstration. #ThingsAreNotOk

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

7 years

This doesn't even look like me

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

!!!!!!

Pizza Hut

@pizzahut

4 years

@NoahGrossman214 We'd like to help. Mind sending us a DM?

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

Hey @dominos ! I’m soon to launch a campaign to raise funds to purchase as many pizzas as I can to deliver to people currently experiencing homelessness! I’m hoping you can help me “deliver” kindness to people in need 🍕

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

1 year

Vidcon was so dope!!! Thanks for coming y’all. Always a pleasure meeting and talking with y’all 🤟🏼

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

2 years

Sprained my big toe having just the wildest sex. That piggy went to the market 🐖

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

3 years

Choke on a hamburger!

Donald J. Trump

@realDonaldTrump

4 years

Anarchists, Agitators or Protestors who vandalize or damage our Federal Courthouse in Portland, or any Federal Buildings in any of our Cities or States, will be prosecuted under our recently re-enacted Statues & Monuments Act. MINIMUM TEN YEARS IN PRISON. Don’t do it! @DHSgov

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

4 years

I haven’t pooped since January.

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Noah Grossman 🥑

@NoahGrossman214

6 years

I can barely stomach this

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