Guardian TV critic, author. Bookworm; a Memoir of Childhood Reading, is out in paperback now. New book (and first novel) Are We Having Fun Yet? out Oct 14
Forgive me - my crap photography cannot do justice to my paperback’s superb ORANGENEITY so have a jpeg instead. And a link, in case you felt inclined to make one of those pre-orders that help
@authors
so much 🙏❤️ xx
My Dad died yesterday. Here he is celebrating yet another convincing Scrabble victory over me a few years ago. And here’s to all the dads worthy of the name ❤️
You could literally have had three policewomen attending Clapham Common tonight, handing out tissues, and that would have been more than enough. Instead, for all-too-fucking-fathomable reasons, we get this
Just seen the Gove/Ferrari clip again, them sniggering over how outrageous his "I drive to test my eyesight too!" claim is. And...children have died alone. Children have died, alone. Because people did what was good and right and lawful, children died alone. I cannot bear it
We’re ending free movement to open Britain up to the world.
It will ensure people can come to our country based on what they have to offer, not where they come from.
Home last night, slept in my own bed for first time in a week, and all I have to do is concentrate on getting better because I haven’t been left with medical bills or anything shitty else. Thank you, NHS 🙏🙏🙏❤️
My local shops in Thailand. In 2 seconds scans my temperature and to see if wearing mask. Doors don’t open if not. 3 cases in 100+ days here. Removes awkward mask arguments for staff as well.
Made cheese scones with the child for the first time.
"Baking is boring, Mummy"
"Yes it fucking is, son. Yes it fucking is."
And they'll taste like shite
Going through another unable-to-read-or-work phase. This is because everything is absolutely awful, mostly in ways it wouldn’t be if we didn’t have nothing but selfish, incompetent cunts in government
Thank you so much to the lovely man and his daughter in Wells Ice Cream Company who just quietly paid for my boy’s cone and drink when, after an already shitty day, I found I had no cash card. So kind. Thank you, thank you 🙏 ❤️
Dear Twitter - Mum, my sister and I have been completely overwhelmed by all your lovely, lovely messages to my post about Dad's death. Thank you so, so much for such kindness. It has helped us every day. With gratitude, the Mangans xxxxx
Finding some minor comfort in how deeply unhappy Boris must be. Just wanted the job. Never wanted his mettle tested. No urge or ability to rise to an occasion. This is a charlatan/narcissist's nightmare
Mum is deciding which of Dad's underpants to relegate to floorcloths in anticipation of the new pack he will unwrap on Christmas day. It's the most wonderful time of the year
If we waste this lockdown - all its hardships, all its sacrifices, all its already-built-in consequences - by coming out too early, which will THEN cost untold additional lives too, THEN send us BACK TO LOCKDOWN I will honestly lose my mind
To the young couple who just stopped me on Vauxhall Bridge Rd to tell me I am beautiful, made in God's image & tried to hug me & would only settle for a high five, it was an entirely hateful experience & I suggest you find another way to proselytise. Thanks
Should we build a royal yacht to boost morale?
Former trade minister Lord Digby Jones has called for £100 million to be spent on a new one to lift the nation's spirits after the coronavirus crisis. But is this the boost the nation needs?
#JeremyVine
I’m gowned n ready to go under the knife and get sorted. And my diabetic friend (a GP who’s been working online while shielding for nearly a year) has just been vaccinated 💪 The rest of this shitshow can wait xxx
Listened to an exhausted nurse crying and being comforted by another last night. Thanks again for everything, Boris, and the rest of your fucking scum mates
I’ve gone back to not being able to read 😭😭😭 I’m so upset at lockdown being lifted so early I can’t settle to anything. Unless it’s staring at the wall
This has been the greatest fucking source of my rage all along. The vacillation. The half-arsery. The laziness. The cowardice. The immorality. The abnegation of responsibility to a literally murderous degree. Fuck Johnson, Cummings and the rest, forever
This is a real moment. Professor Neil Ferguson:
"The epidemic was doubling every three to four days before lockdown interventions were introduced. So had we introduced lockdown measures a week earlier, we would have then reduced the final death toll by at least a half."
I’m so tired I could cry but I haven’t the energy. Now back up to bedroom to force child through maths worksheet. Fuck everything, and good luck to everyone xxxx
Operation over, morphine haze not. Ideal situation 😀 Thank you again for all your kindness, Twitter, and your excellent suggestions for kit afterwards. A list is being made ❤️🙏🙏
I have completed two vile admin tasks today that have been crouching in my soul for weeks and weeks and I wish to cry with pride and relief but will probably just have a Magnum
I am either pre-menstrual, entirely broken by the pandemic or both but the touching simplicity, practicality and best-endeavours-ness of this has just made me cry
My god BBC. “The extraordinary story of paralympic and Olympic sprinter” who “suddenly found himself at the centre of a murder investigation.”
Extraordinary? Found himself? INSPIRATIONAL?! No way to talk about a convicted murderer. Talk about minimising the murder of women.
I've said it before and I'll say it again - Floella Benjamin laid her hands upon my belly when I was six months pregnant and the child and I have basically existed in a state of grace ever since 😍
Thank you for another day of kind messages, Twitter. I have to have an operation on my ankle tomorrow so am in hospital for at least a further 24 hours. To answer your main question - my Kindle is here and fully loaded, so all is basically well xxxx
Foot not deswoled sufficiently so op will be Mon at best. It’s all very...2020. Still, Xmas with parents was already cancelled so why not lean into it? Still aware I’m v lucky. I will heal, my friends are being wonderful, & Twitter so kind. Love & thanks (&evening morphine) xxxxx
NEW: Boris Johnson's Rule Of 6 has a controversial exemption - for grouse shooting and similar field sports.
Upto 30 people can gather to hunt with guns cos classed as a licensed outdoor sport.
EXCLUSIVE: Cab Office drafted special meeting on exemption
Today my sister tries to set Mum and Dad up with Zoom so we can 'meet' later. The risen Christ will be less of a miracle than if she succeeds. Happy Easter xxx
Yes, the deliverance from evil of America and everything BUT ALSO I just sent my final draft of my new book to my editor so - double slainte, everyone, and hallelujahs xxxxx
I just want to go out for dinner with friends and see and speak to them properly and it feels like that’s years away. (I’m not really complaining - I know this is hardly a problem - just...yearning, I suppose. And missing folk)
I miss when hygge was a thing. That was a happy time. Tell me what you do to make yourself cosy. It's the best thing, I don't want to lose it yes I've been drinking what of it
My mum and dad got their first jabs today - no queuing, no problems, painless in every way. Thank you everyone organising things at Downham leisure centre ❤️🙏🙏🙏
So this morning, like many of us, I just want to cry and cry and cry, but what shall we do instead? Normally I’d throw myself into work but that’s one of the things making me cry, so...🤔
Please don't lift lockdown without knowing what you're doing and why. That's all I ask of people in charge. But they're absolute fuckheads, so on we'll go
Foreign Secretary and Conservative leadership candidate
@Jeremy_Hunt
says he would like to see the legal time limit on abortions reduced from 24 weeks to 12.
#Ridge
For more, head here:
I am in Norfolk. For less than 48 hours, but I could cry with happiness. Also with misery because I saw my shielding parents for three hugless hours but... anyway, booze now