crazy to think that it’s now been 5 years since I walked down to the arena with Martyn to see Ariana and he never came back 😔 I can’t thank him enough for everything he did for me before he died and for everything his memory continues to do for me 💖
I (for reasons I don’t know) follow the mum from “I’m in me mum’s car” on Snapchat and it warms my heart that she’s so supportive of her son’s transition
omg walked past 2 builders and thought I was about to get gay bashed cos one went “look at that tshirt” but then the other went “ah Britney that’s mint” then the first one went “have you seen she wants to get all her dough back from her dad?” and the other went “good for her” 😭
was chatting away to this lovely straight woman in a club and she asked me “so when did you come out?” and I started going “oh well I was 18 and I had this boyfriend…” and she goes “oh sorry to stop you but I meant when did you fly out to Ibiza 😭😭
I absolutely love going out on a Friday cos it means you get my favourite thing which I coined as a “double Sunday” cos Saturday feels like a Sunday but then you get another Sunday on Sunday x
dunno why people waste their annual leave taking the time off between Christmas and New Year, in 3 days the only email I’ve had is from Hello Fresh from when I signed up with my work email to get another free trial
What happened last night was not funny. Far-left activists disrupted the event, which then had to be stopped for security reasons.
This is done to intimidate people and suppress free speech. I won't stand for it.
Would we see the same reaction if the activists were far-right?
I’m shaking that Sophie Anderson is in hospital after one of her implants literally exploded in her chest and her fella this morning has jizzed in a cup to bring and feed it to her when he visits, never a day off
imagine being Anne Marie rn, performing at Glastonbury on the Friday then you’re in court on Monday watching your husband get tried for two counts of rape 😬
After 2 weeks of multiple health screens and asking everyone to quarantine, I surprised my closest inner circle with a trip to a private island where we could pretend things were normal just for a brief moment in time.
back in my day you didn’t have step counters built into your phone, you used to have to buy 3 boxes of Special K, cut out the coupons and post them off to Kellogg’s for a free pedometer
there are certain jobs where I just don’t understand why the staff have to wear formal wear, like why is the bloke helping you choose glasses in Specsavers basically in top hat and tails
I’m so glad I don’t date because to me this is totally mental? the fella probably chose a pub he was familiar with and thought his date would like, and then this guy pathologises the whole thing and puts him on blast like wtf 😅
Keisha from the Sugababes once pulled up her Wikipedia page to show to the cashier at a shop she was trying to buy a bottle of wine from after they ID’d her, and they still didn’t serve her
I remember when I used to go out to parties, events, clubs nearly every night of the week, and now my diary is full of… the opening of the Arndale B&M 😭
everyone still gunning for Jonny based on ‘feelings’ after Anthony laid out a perfectly logical and well thought out explanation as to why Paul must be traitor, thick table
#TheTraitors
BIG NEWS!
We’re taking the show on the road for an exclusive town hall event with the former Prime Minister in Leigh on June 15.
Liz Truss said: “It’s great to be returning to Leigh with Dan Wootton and GB News. We want to get Britain growing again.”
🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧
as a Notts alum I knew I recognised Tia Kofi as the star behind this ICONIC piece of Student Union election promo - can’t wait to see what the verse she puts out on
#DragRaceUK
I can’t tell if people are retweeting this because they genuinely think this only happens every 200 years, because they know I’m taking the piss about how often it occurs, or because they just like that it is a rectangle 😂
if Carol Voderman is responsible for the downfall of this government then I am going to need a 10 part Netflix dramatisation of her life: from her childhood in Prestatyn, getting a third class degree from Cambridge, Countdown and being usurped by the evil RR, to the present day
one of my fave CBB moments is when Christopher Maloney is all timid trying to approach Gemma like “erm… I heard… erm… a couple have people have said…” and she just goes “that I called you a silly cunt and walked out? yeah I did”