Mntano Mntlane @LMkonqo Twitter profile

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Mntano Mntlane

2 years

Took leave, dressed up, took a flight to EL with a huge teddy bear and surprised my daughter in her spelling bee participation nton-nton

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

For her GradeR graduation, I drove the whole night to surprise her. Umama wakhe kept on updating me that they're now on the way to the school not knowing that I was waiting for them on some ta-daaa!! Evidence of driving the whole night on the bumper😂

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

It's not a big deal but I am the 1st person to have a Polo R-Line in my village, I was the 1st one to have a Corsa GSi futhi😂😂😂

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

I took leave, dressed up and attended my daughters GradeR graduation. I was the only father by the way, the rest were GrandMothers.

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

When she told me that 2 boys were bullying her at school ndaphuma eSandton after work kwasa ndiseEastern Cape ndangena ndidontse ipanama kwesaskolo ndigushe Okapi yam..

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

How it started vs. How it's going

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

As a twin I had to go in first before the body of my twin can be lowered

Keletso💫💕💫

@KeletsoMss

2 years

Ko majiteng

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

She cried for it when she was 2 years and at when she was 5 it fit perfectly 😂😍❤️ Diva kaDaddy 😍

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

Finally, we are feeling much better and we can go home with the young leader🥵

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

East London students isukile #NationalShutdown

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

The most difficult thing I had to do this year was to tell my daughter that she has a lil brother, turned I was afraid of nonsense because she was so excited "sayombona nini kengoku Daddy" "ngubani gama lakhe".. He gets endless kisses whenever we go see him ❤️❤️

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

Nawe you played Errol on 7de Laan zange sithethe

UncleKeyz

@mnm_meya

1 year

So a Sotho guy is gon play Shaka 😂

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

My unemployed son has a Diploma in Analytical Chemistry, 2 years working experience. If you know anyone in the field who needs a hardworker nantsi. RT for awareness maybe his employer might be on your TL

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

When I started working permanently, the post was so dope bandenzela neBusiness cards😂😂😂 I was no longer asking for numbers zamaCherry ndandivele ndikugibisele ngeBusiness Card yam qha😂😂😂 So 31 Dec at night eBeach Front, apparently I gave iCherry yaseDutywa my card and..

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

In 2003, my dad said I must bring a note book & a pen. He then said bhala Imbeleko nam ke ndabhala, then he said bhala day1.. then he gave me a step by step guide sokuba yenziwa njani imbeleko from start to finish. I later typed & saved the information indincedaaaa!

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

Took leave, flew to EL to spend time with my son. The 10 days partenal leave is not enough, Fathers should be getting the entire month. Call the "Fish Swimming Applaude Gang" this side izondithuka

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

My lil Bro neGF yakhe, they even have initials of each other

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

Good morning to all the Polo drivers. Let me see your hot Polos under this tweet. Let me start... Nanku RaRa ♨️🔥🌡️

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

AKA must be smiling to see that uBongz is trying to give Kairo the type of love she knows from uTata. Bongz is making sure that Kairo continues experiencing the Daddy-Daughter love & bond even if Mega ayikho. Putting the child first 🖤🖤

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

My name was used in a Gang Rape ordeal... The year was 2006, I was doing my Honours. One Saturday morning I woke up and decided to go home - something I used to do and still doing when I get home sick. So I took 3 taxis to get home a total of 180km. Ekhaya kusekuqaleni kelali..

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

He told his family that when he dies he wants to be buried in Cape Town where he has spent most of his time, but when he died the family decided they are going to bury him in the Eastern Cape where he was born. Okay fine ke ingabinamsebenzi, the day they went to fetch his body..

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

I am packing my stuff, getting into parts of the wardrobe that I hardly check then I find this😂😂😂😂 my Ex kodwa😂😂😂 - she is my Ex ke zange ndide ndimtshate

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

Once had a thing with this hun who was staying with her 3 year old son. After 8pm we would be chatting on whatsapp & when I ask uBoy wenzan she would say ulele, but when I visit her uBoy does not sleep till 11pm and he be asking me questions "uzolala phi wena" 😭😭 Bayadika aba👶

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

So she drove into my car scratched it & deny it. She later agrees we exchanged numbers etc. I got home I receive a call from the husband saying I indimidated & disrespected his wife & he wants to meet me and knock me.I gave him my location ndathi makakhawuleze ndimlindile..

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

So few days after the death of my father, we are sitting with our mom trying to draft his obituary and I am asking my mom "wayesebenza phi ke umyeni wakho"... did my mom not burst out laughing kulamatrasi 😂😂😂😂 wahleka walila inyembezi and we all laughed because we knew sh***

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

The society does does not really trust men with babies #StoryTime So my daughter was a prem,an urgent c-section was done at 33weeks of pregnancy, my lil diva was 2,1kg,delivered at 07h:55am on a windy Sunday of the 10th day of Jube 2012. When they took me to her ekwi-incubator

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

How I was sexually harassed.. So the 1st semester at University starts in February, right? There I was doing my 1st year BSc walking late into the class because I was lost for a while looking for the venue yePhysics "Thermodynamics" lecture

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

10 months

They been issuing licences to bottle stores opposite to schools in our black townships - xa isenziwa eCenturion niyakhala

Yusuf Abramjee

@Abramjee

10 months

How does the Gauteng Liquor Board @GautengDED @GautengProvince isssue a licence for a bottle store right next to a hospital in Raslouw, Centurion? This is at the Lifestyle @55 Mall. The Raslouw Private Hospital is situated right next to the bottle store and some locals say

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

When she speaks her Setswana with me I understand her, but when she is conversing with her sisters yho yho yho, even the tone changes and I would feel like they are talking about me yhuuuuu. I think she is using uStandard Grade weSetswana xa ethetha nam lamntana. Basop oBathong!

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

#StroyTime How I scored myself a criminal record because of this machine.....

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

Grootmans in suits 👌 Let me see you in your suit under this tweet gents.

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

My daughter with endless goodbyes 😂❤️

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

Great improvement, dropped kwiMaths and she is not taking my calls because of that. She is disappointed with that Level6, but Daddy is proud. Grade 5 sizongena ngevosho💃💃

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

My twin sister graduated with a BSoc(SWK) in 2010,got her drivers license and permanent employment the same year, then she died the same year... few days after my birthday. In 2013 I met some girls who went to Varsity with her and they asked me uba uphi uMakhanyi, with a smile on

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

My dad left my mom embarrassed #StoryTime My dad - a traditional healer always had people coming in and out of his house. Some were seeking help, healing from different sicknesses, some were just lingering around for food and alcohol. There is always gin, vodka brandy emagqirhen

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

I suffered from severe acne throughout Varsity.The way I looked was a major reason why I never got laid at Varsity, but the confidence I now have is a result of growing a thick skin through the severe acne scars that I now embrace. 2005 I didn't have mirror and never wanted one

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

The most difficult thing I had to do as iDyani was to go back home to my parents & tell them that my twin sister did not make it. Mom kept on calling while I was on the way & I just couldn't answer her calls..because I wanted to break the news and comfort her same time #2010Oct

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

2019 on a flight from JHB - PE, this young married couple was sitting next to me with this gorgeous lady here. She started crying before the flight took off, the mom would pass her to the dad she didn't stop crying abuyele kumama still akhale, then I asked them if I can hold her

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

What is happening on the N2 between Berlin & KWT is bad😐💔💔💔

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

I had an STI when I was 14 years old.... Took Tiger Lines to go to the clinic.. When I told the sister in charger that I think I have an STI, she was in disbelief and asked who am I sleeping with. I told her I have 3 GFs, wandibetha ndanya lasisi #TrueStory

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

6 months

Wasweleka nje kanjalo umntwam...ingaske ndivuswe kuthwe ndiyaphupha💔

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

Not everyone uyafanelwa yimoto yakhe. Eyam iyandifanela 👊💯👌 Let's see you and your car - let us tell you if yakufanela or not🤣😁

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

I have so much respect for anyone who has been to Build-It, CashBuild, Builders or any store that sells building material to buy ezizinto. Check the roof in F3, f*** up😡 it needed to be changed & the material can't be reused. Ndandifuna umfaka Okapi umakhi wathi umama hayi hayi

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

5 months

The month of April was the worst month for me, in fact it was a month from hell. Here is a mini thread of the events of April...

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

10 months

Dr: I'm sorry sir, but I will need to admit him.. where is his mother? Me: that's okay Doc, the mother is not here. Dr: but who is going to look after him? Me: I am the father.. Dr: don't you have a sister that can stay with him? Me: don't worry Doc, this is my son.

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

To everyone who donated and assisted her.. you have made it possible for her to attend her graduation. On her behalf, ndiyabulela kakhulu ndenze njalo nakwabanye. Congratulations Tishalakazi 🎓🎊🎉❤️

Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

If you are intersted and able to donate for her graduation, please let me know bethuna 🎓🙏🙏

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@GwiliYedwa Her other dad was there, he came to drop her by the way... Daughter stays winning because both her fathers are pulling in one direction

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

Eversince I was introduced to losisi ndayeka uthenga iDomestos bleach, sprays zocleaner laminated floor etc. I only buy Bicarbonate of Soda, Dish Washing liquid, White vinegar & Alcohol.... My name is Luvuyo Mkonqo and I aaaaaaaaam the male house keeper😂😂😂

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

I inspired my cousin - he got himself a Polo R-Line too. He is actually the 1st guy to have it in his village 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

One day I saw a police van driving behind me, I didn't know that they were coming for me I thought they were just going the same direction until I stopped at Tiger Wheel & Tyre and leVan imise kakubi behind me and cops jump out saying we have been trying to stop you why ungami..

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

5 years

They might not have everything but they are happy yazi😂😂😂 #TheQueenMzansi

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

At 16 years my friend got dumped by his GF and he was heart broken. I had my skills with girls so I told him ndingamcengela kulamntana wakhe, so we went together to the girls house and I told him to hide across the road ukwenzela lomntana angaboni uba sihamba soy2...

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

4 years

I don't have a father but I am father to my special daughter #FathersDay

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@LMkonqo

2 years

During the course of flattening the acne scars some girl said my face looks like Deboinars Something Meaty pizza 😂😂😂 I checked myself on the mirror and she was wrong my face looked more like a Lunchbar

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@LMkonqo

1 year

Today marks 11 years since we each scored ourselves new names. She calls me Daddy, I call her Diva kaDaddy. Ndithand'ukufa andifuni niks ngaye nguMafungwashe wam lo😍. Cela nithi hoooray🎉💐🎊

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

Ndayiporhela yaphambana laAdministartor ndandityaniswa noPrincipal fast ndafika ndikhohlela idangatye nakuloPrincipal the 2 boys were called in, reprimanded and I demanded they call their parents bafounelwa nangoku and the matter was resolved. My daughter was never bullied again

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

11 months

And then my son sent me this that sihleli soy2 endlini.... I was like tseek masiyothenga Old Buck fast kwedini rhaaaa usebenzile. Now I need R47K to pay UJ so that we can attend the graduation next year,buy for now idyani iHappy

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@Presley_phoebie Yhea no families are different, I send money every month but last month things didn't look good financially and I told my mom, she told me not to worry they still good and same day she sent me some money "nantso imali yepetrol ke ndoda" ❤️

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

6 months

East London came in full force... Dankie gents!!

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

This is the guy that declined his 1st ever job interview, just to support me & drive me to Aliwal North when I lost my sister. He is one brother that is solution driven. Ndicela nithi Happy Birthday kuNcibane umntakwethu!

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@khutso_donovan Fact 😂😂😂😂😂😂 it was not nice growing up as the only boy amongst 5 girls and being a twin yhooo haay... I was told that I can stop the rain and I used to dunusa when kududuma and raining to stop it

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@LMkonqo

3 years

Just when I thought episodes with Xhosa woman are crazy then uMazulu came to claim the Number1 spot #Uyajola99 #Uyajola99Sundays

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

4 years

Another man who deserves his flowers esaphela madoda #DiepCityMzansi #diepcity

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

1 year

This has been happening for a couple of weeks. They bunk school & go to one of the units here..it's been turned into a high school brothel. 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@reesey456 oClaustoWhatWhat zizobazi ngoku sesibadala, when you a black child growing up in the villages azikho ezonto😂😂😂

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

6 months

Had the best time of my life nomntanabantu...

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@ZiziFunani dlula ubengathi awuboni xa ikurhawuzelelisa ngezinza sisi

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

But zona izandla bekungamelanga uba zezam

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

4 years

I think my Boyz killed it 💯💯 abafana baseMonti #duduzanezumachallenge

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@east_maps Send me your location nja yam, ndizokuphendula f2f

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

5 years

He is one of the best actors eMzansi, he is multilingual jonga lalela he is good #Gomora

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

6 months

IsiXhosa sithi induku entle igawulwa ezizweni, namhlanje ndikwezozizwe to bid farewell kulonduku intle

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

⚠️Car accident on the R63 highway, a blue Ford Ranger with registration number Mzabalazi EC has overturned. It is suspected the driver lost control of the vehicle and it overturned. The driver is suspected of being under the influence of the baby formula

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

6 months

From talking everyday, texting each other every hour to not talking forever, like forever ever, rhaa sies maan ukufa kundibambe yinkunzi. Ndivele ndabawela iNip yeOld Buck....ningandihoyi ningandisizeli because andigowi ndiyafokofa & by the look of things kusezonyiwa goed..

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@LMkonqo

2 years

The Father vs. The Son

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@LMkonqo

2 years

@gnont Naku ekhaya

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

28 days

Flashback Friday - birthday yam yokuqala naye. The most difficult adjustment for me was to let a woman pay ndikhona, she called on my bday and asked my plans ndathi ndizonxila mna and she said ucela undikhupha for lunch, ndabuza phi wathi she will come pick me up ndathi haibo..

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@LMkonqo

2 years

The Tswana hun is turning thirty-ntonnton ❤️, ndicela nithi happy birthday if niyafuna uba anifuni niyeke andinicengi.. My Tswana people how do I say a proper Setswana message without "lerato lapilo yaka"? Please help a brother out..

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@LMkonqo

3 years

Appreciation tweet for this man. There is a lot we wouldn't know about celebrities if it was not for this podcast. Ntinga ntakandini #PodcastandChill

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

3 years

She got me feeling like Uncle Vinny 😂😂😂😂😂 Yhooooo #BigXhosa 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

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@LMkonqo

2 years

@mwebiamutugi DNA yantoni wena utsho ngeShirt yeSoul Brothers apha

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@LMkonqo

2 years

@Mthoka2 The Gold one is full full like igcwele qhu, le iGreen iphungulwe like two teaspoons missing

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@LMkonqo

2 years

How many spiritual kids do you have? Spiritual kids are miscarriages & abortions. Something we are all not ready to share, right??

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@LMkonqo

6 months

Ndimthandile...

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@LMkonqo

4 years

How many likes for Ntokzin debate speech 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️ #Gomora #gomoramzansi

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@LMkonqo

2 years

I think I passed more than 10 cars ezimoshakeleyo, be it a burst trye, eliflat or mechanical kuvulwe bonnet.... I made it home safe ngentando kaQamata neziNyanya

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@LMkonqo

1 year

Now I need to sit with Olady & ask about ezinye izinto ndizibhale nazo

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@LMkonqo

6 months

I took pics & videos of every moment sindawonye as if I knew that her life would be cut short. The only thing I am now left with is all these precious memories 🕊️

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@LMkonqo

1 year

Hayi kwedini ❤️👌🙏🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

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@LMkonqo

2 years

@vdm_vicks It was tears when I had to run to the airport

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@LMkonqo

6 months

For the past few days I couldn't take phone calls - people were calling tryin to find out uba ndinjani but bendingaphenduli. I tried replying & reacting to the text messages to show that andifanga ndiyaphila qha ndiyafokofa. Received a lot of DMs comforting me. ENKOSINI ndigrand!

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@LMkonqo

6 months

The King turns 2 today ❤️

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@LMkonqo

2 years

My dad once fetched the cops who disrespected him and his work, wayobalanda ePolice station - cops had to run for the lives #StoryTime So y'all know my dad was a healer (iGqirha) - his purpose was to help heal people. Okay fine, in the early 90s while we (kids) were playing..

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

So, after talking with my crying daughter on the phone, getting all the details of the young bullies. I wrote a long email to the school detailing the incident but when I left the office isikolo asikayiphenduli email yam. I was so pissed, like really pissed - got home and packed

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@LMkonqo

6 months

Truth is we never know how much time we have kulomhlaba. The date of death is always hidden..

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@LMkonqo

3 years

On behalf of amajita we want #SexFirstDateLater or kanjani maGrootman

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@Inenekazi1 😂😂😂😂😂 Cremation is a new thing, it is not an African way but I guess you also going jump embizeni before kulaytwe umlilo😂😂😂😂 Haay tseek futhi

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

It's not a big deal nyani, my boys have Mercs guys...don't be emotional😂😂😂😂😂

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

My twin sister (imfusi yamawele) died in 2010, 2 years later uThixo neziNyanya gave me her photocopy as a daughter. I almost cried when she dreamt of uDabs wakhe that she only knows from photos.

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Mntano Mntlane

@LMkonqo

2 years

@C_that Nothing really because I knew while growing up that, it was something that one of us had to do....I was in a grieving state, most of what was going on was something that needed to happen from identifying the body, fetching it and the spirit...ndayenza yonke

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