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Diane Langberg, PhD Profile
Diane Langberg, PhD

@DianeLangberg

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20
Following
445
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Psychologist. Trauma Expert. International Speaker. Consultant. "When the Church Harms God’s People,” releasing 11/2024.

Jenkintown, PA
Joined November 2012
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Pinned Tweet
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
8 years
I am so sorry that due to the nature of my work and the ethics involved in my profession, I am not able to provide individual responses.
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885
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Never assume that someone who is gifted verbally and has theological knowledge is spiritually wise and mature.
41
509
4K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
The length of the grieving is determined by the griever - not by how long you, as comforter, can stand to be sad.
21
442
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
When you sit with a griever, your work is to be with them where they are, not drag them out where you are more comfortable.
25
303
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
May we know Christ so well in 2022 that we can discern what is unlike Him no matter the seductive or religious garb it wears.
13
291
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
We damage the dignity of others when we refuse to wait for them – whether they need to tie their own shoes or they are struggling to find words for the indescribable. We bestow honor on another when we consider him or her worth waiting for.
29
357
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a man who stood for Christ and against not just Hitler but also the Christendom of his day, penned this benediction from prison: “May God in His mercy lead us through these times; but above all, may He lead us to Himself.”
14
292
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
When you sit with a griever, your work is to be with him where he is, not drag him out where you are more comfortable.
18
354
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
We will crush traumatized humans if we place on them the expectation that if they did faith right they would be instantly fine.
30
402
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Christianity does not look like praying and singing and giving money while ignoring the screams, unspeakable suffering, filth, and death of others. Christianity is not calling others *them*—somehow unlike us, not human, deserving of their suffering.
14
447
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
We will crush traumatized humans if we place on them the expectation that if they did faith right they would be instantly fine.
42
335
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Every time we treat someone with dignity rather than shame, respect rather than disregard, concern rather than exploitation, kindness rather than brutality and careful attention rather than turning away – we are doing things that are the reverse of trauma and evil.
21
421
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
We damage the dignity of others when we refuse to wait for them – whether they need to tie their own shoes or they are struggling to find words for the indescribable.  We bestow honor on another when we consider him or her worth waiting for.
37
351
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
When you sit with a griever, your work is to be with him where he is, not drag him out where you are more comfortable.
12
277
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
5 years
We damage the dignity of others when we refuse to wait for them – whether they need to tie their own shoes or they are struggling to find words for the indescribable.  We bestow honor on another when we consider him or her worth waiting for.
27
394
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Repentance is not seen in tears; it is not seen in words; it is not seen in emotion. Repentance is long, slow, consistent change over an extended period of time because it is from the heart outward. Heart change is supernatural work.
15
320
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
5 years
Christianity does not look like praying and singing and giving money while ignoring the screams, unspeakable suffering, filth, and death of others. Christianity is not calling others *them*—somehow unlike us, not human, deserving of their suffering.
12
357
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Christianity does not look like praying and singing and giving money while ignoring the screams, unspeakable suffering, filth, and death of others.  Christianity is not calling others *them*—somehow unlike us, not human, deserving of their suffering.
8
288
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Never assume that someone who is gifted verbally and has theological knowledge is spiritually wise and mature.
12
240
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
The length of the grieving is determined by the griever - not by how long you, as comforter, can stand to be sad.
12
382
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
A pastor with a theological degree and knowledge of Scripture can lift words out of those Scriptures, pronounce them with authority, and wound those under their care. An ability to articulate theological truths does not mean the speaker is an obedient servant of God.
26
235
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Trauma stories do not first come out with a beginning, middle and an end. They come out in broken pieces, disordered and perhaps unclear.
24
280
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
We damage the dignity of others when we refuse to wait for them – whether they need to tie their own shoes or they are struggling to find words for the indescribable. We bestow honor on another when we consider him or her worth waiting for.
20
288
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
If you are going to enter into the suffering of those who have been traumatized, you have to learn how to sit with and listen to fear, anger and great grief with compassion and understanding.  You will also have to learn how to do it for far longer than you prefer.
29
274
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
The length of the grieving is determined by the griever, not by how long you, as a comforter, can stand to be sad.  Your work is to be with them where they are, not drag them out where you are more comfortable.
18
344
2K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Contrary to popular belief, children are not resilient, a word which simply means they can return to their original state. They do not “bounce back” from abuse.
18
270
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Jesus’s strongest rebukes were for those religious leaders who used the words of God to crush and control.
16
272
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Unhealthy systems want to kill the one who is pointing out the cancer rather than killing the cancer.
17
295
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
You do not need to be extraordinary. You need to be the ordinary inhabited by the extraordinary life of God. A word, a meal, a cup of cold water, have the capacity to bring the life of God to this world and delight His heart.
9
232
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Oppression is literally a crushing of the image of God in humans. To say or do nothing when power is abused is to contribute to the defacing of God’s image in others. In other words, it is to join with the enemy of God who sought to destroy that same image.
4
395
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
If you are going to enter into the suffering of those who have been traumatized, you have to learn how to sit with and listen to fear, anger and great grief with compassion and understanding. You will also have to learn how to do it for far longer than you prefer.
19
263
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Trauma stories do not first come out with a beginning, middle and an end. They come out in broken pieces, disordered and perhaps unclear.
13
228
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Never assume that someone who is gifted verbally and has theological knowledge is spiritually wise and mature.
17
208
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
When a body is so broken that it is entirely dependent on the care of others or a mind is basically gone, we are called to give dignity to what remains, for it still houses one created in the image of God.
12
146
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
5 years
I swore never to be silent whenever human beings endure suffering and humiliation. We must take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Sometimes we must interfere. — Elie Wiesel
9
444
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Suffering people often need others to have faith and hope for them.  Admonitions to hope or trust only often result in despair; if the sufferers were able, they would do so.  It is often helpful to say, “I know you struggle to hope right now. I will hope for you.”
16
265
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
A pastor with a theological degree and knowledge of Scripture can lift words out of those Scriptures, pronounce them with authority, and wound those under their care. An ability to articulate theological truths does not mean the speaker is an obedient servant of God.
43
167
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Jesus’s strongest rebukes were for those religious leaders who used the words of God to crush and control.
19
223
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
When a body is so broken that it is entirely dependent on the care of others or a mind is basically gone, we are called to give dignity to what remains, for it still houses one created in the image of God.
16
143
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
10 months
Every time we treat someone with dignity rather than shame, respect rather than disregard, concern rather than exploitation, kindness rather than brutality and careful attention rather than turning away – we are doing things that are the reverse of trauma and evil.
14
311
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Teach your church that any form of abuse is NEVER acceptable to God no matter who does it or how important the abuser is. Call your people to holiness in all the corners of their lives.
14
202
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
When the mourner tells you what they feel and think - you do not teach.  You listen; you bear witness; you reassure because you understand the nature of grief.
6
224
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
We often assume that if sufferers are bringing God’s glory into their suffering they will not scream or bleed, but sit quietly, hands folded and smile peacefully.  Glory is never found in such pretense. Our glorious Lord screamed and bled.
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224
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
We often seem to want people who have suffered terrible things to just “get over it”. They cannot.  Evil has real impact and does real damage.
21
244
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
It is never helpful to remind one grieving of what they have not lost or of the fact that it could have been worse.  We do not grieve what we have but what we do not have. We compare our loss to the good we had, not to the bad that never happened. The empty space is that - empty.
9
224
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
6 years
Clergy sexual abuse is not an affair; pedophilia is not about struggling with difficult circumstances; molesting adolescents is not about a struggling marriage. Such things must be called by their right names- the abuser needs to be held responsible for his/her abusive behavior.
18
220
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
10 months
We damage the dignity of others when we refuse to wait for them – whether they need to tie their own shoes or they are struggling to find words for the indescribable.  We bestow honor on another when we consider him or her worth waiting for.
11
218
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
We must never assume that someone who is gifted verbally and has theological knowledge is spiritually wise and mature.  Sometimes that leader is power hungry and self-serving, working the system and the people in it to feed him/herself.
25
150
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Not a single word in the Beatitudes relates to human notions of what a kingdom is like. Human ideas of kingdom building focus on nation, race, tribe, military strength, and wealth. Jesus teaches that greatness in His kingdom is found in the character that reflects His likeness.
9
146
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Do not think you cannot kill a soul with words alone. Do not think, “Well, at least he didn’t hit her.” Yes, he did. He just didn’t use his fists.
15
183
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
When a body is so broken that it is entirely dependent on the care of others or a mind is basically gone, we are called to give dignity to what remains, for it still houses one created in the image of God.
9
100
1K
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
The length of the grieving is determined by the griever, not by how long you, as a comforter, can stand to be sad.  Your work is to be with them where they are, not drag them out where you are more comfortable.
18
214
995
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Know Christ so well you can discern what is unlike Him no matter the seductive or religious garb it wears. God is building His kingdom in the hearts of men and women, not in the externals we have come to love and protect and praise.
10
186
986
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
11 months
Contrary to popular belief, children are not resilient, a word which simply means they can return to their original state. They do not “bounce back” from abuse.
18
205
988
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
One of the characteristics of dealing with trauma is the repetitious nature of that work.  Survivors will say the same things over and over.  They will be repetitious in dealing with their emotions.  They will repeat their losses again and again.
22
151
983
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Suffering people often need others to have faith and hope for them. Admonitions to hope or trust only often result in despair; if the sufferers were able, they would do so. It is often helpful to say, “I know you struggle to hope right now. I will hope for you.”
19
208
981
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Trauma brings silence because it feels like there are no words to really describe what happened. Many times people need us to sit with them in silence. It is a way of joining with them so they are not alone in their experience of struggling to find words.
16
217
974
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
When the mourner tells you what they feel and think - you do not teach.  You listen; you bear witness; you reassure because you understand the nature of grief.
7
187
963
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
As Christians, in our disagreeing we must never dismiss or de-humanize another or we become ungodly. The trashing, demeaning, humiliating and labeling of others is horrifying and grieves the heart of our God.
12
153
972
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Every time we treat someone with dignity rather than shame, respect rather than disregard, concern rather than exploitation, kindness rather than brutality and careful attention rather than turning away – we are doing things that are the reverse of trauma and evil.
6
254
956
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Timely reminder from Elie Wiesel: “I swore never to be silent whenever and wherever human beings endure suffering and humiliation. We must always take sides. Neutrality always helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.”
6
282
948
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Clergy sexual abuse is not an affair; pedophilia is not about struggling with difficult circumstances; molesting adolescents is not about a struggling marriage.  Such things must be called by their right names- the abuser needs to be held responsible for his/her abusive behavior.
19
133
943
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
I fear we often tend to select leaders in the Christian world according to gifting rather than character.  We have watched large institutions - ones we believed successful and godly - come apart when there is exposure of ungodly but “successful” leadership. Integrity must lead.
19
183
922
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Clergy sexual abuse is not an affair; pedophilia is not about struggling with difficult circumstances; molesting adolescents is not about a struggling marriage.  Such things must be called by their right names- the abuser needs to be held responsible for his/her abusive behavior.
15
163
925
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Teach your church that any form of abuse is NEVER acceptable to God no matter who does it or how important the abuser is. Call your people to holiness in all the corners of their lives.
15
194
900
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Know Christ so well you can discern what is unlike Him no matter the seductive or religious garb it wears. God is building His kingdom in the hearts of men and women, not in the externals we have come to love and protect and praise.
6
177
915
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
It is always the responsibility of the person with power to maintain the integrity of the relationship. Always.
8
156
898
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
You will never meet, talk to, walk with, or work beside a human being who has not been purposefully knit together by the hands of our Father. Never. We are all one race, and in that race, all are image bearers. There are no exceptions.
8
128
897
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
10 months
Trauma has a profound spiritual impact. Trauma raises questions about who God is. Victims are uncertain of His character; His faithfulness; His love and His capacity to keep us, to be our refuge. Trauma mutilates hope; it shatters faith; it turns the world upside-down.
23
177
891
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
It misrepresents God when we tell victims of atrocious, life-changing abuse to simply forgive and forget. Forgiveness of any wrong, let alone a life-shattering one, is never a “just do it” task.
26
149
889
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
You do not need to be extraordinary. You need to be the ordinary inhabited by the extraordinary life of God.  A word, a meal, a cup of cold water, have the capacity to bring the life of God to this world and delight His heart.
14
155
888
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
5 years
We must never assume that someone who is gifted verbally and has theological knowledge is spiritually wise and mature.   Sometimes that leader is a well-disguised narcissist, working the system and the people in it to feed himself.
25
183
871
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Every time we treat someone with dignity rather than shame, respect rather than disregard, concern rather than exploitation, kindness rather than brutality and careful attention rather than turning away – we are doing things that are the reverse of trauma and evil.
12
258
867
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Every time we treat someone with dignity rather than shame, respect rather than disregard, concern rather than exploitation, kindness rather than brutality and careful attention rather than turning away – we are doing things that are the reverse of trauma and evil.
8
211
864
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Contrary to popular belief, children are not resilient, a word which simply means they can return to their original state. They do not “bounce back” from abuse.
12
155
866
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Trauma does not heal apart from being spoken and it needs to be heard in the context of a safe relationship where the dignity of the one crushed is restored.
5
227
857
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
It is very common for survivors of chronic childhood abuse to say, “I am fine” when in fact they do not even know what “fine” feels like.
11
148
859
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
The length of the grieving is determined by the griever, not by how long you, as a comforter, can stand to be sad. Your work is to be with them where they are, not drag them out where you are more comfortable.
4
188
862
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
We damage the dignity of others when we refuse to wait for them – whether they need to tie their own shoes or they are struggling to find words for the indescribable.  We bestow honor on another when we consider him or her worth waiting for.
18
165
863
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
It is always the responsibility of the person with power to maintain the integrity of the relationship. Always.
6
135
856
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Grief is work. It takes tremendous energy and is often exhausting. But it is a worthwhile task and you will not heal by avoiding it.
12
144
858
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Jesus’ strongest words were for those religious leaders who used the words of God to crush and destroy humanity.
9
163
857
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
As Christians, in our disagreeing we must never dismiss or de-humanize another or we become ungodly. The trashing, demeaning, humiliating and labeling of others is horrifying and grieves the heart of our God.
22
149
856
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Verbal power is a tremendous power.  People who have a command of words, or are articulate, can dominate a conversation, a room, a relationship, a group or a nation.   Words can be used to influence, shape and encourage or to humiliate, deceive, maneuver and control.
7
275
835
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
I fear that a portion of Christendom today has become less interested in truth and more interested in power. We have acquired fame, money, status, reputation, and little kingdoms.
17
136
849
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Healing generational trauma is like turning a very large ship. It must be done little by little or the ship will sink. But if you turn it, even a bit, the passengers on the ship will now be facing a different way-they will have a different view. The unimaginable becomes possible.
5
180
836
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Tears require strength and courage because they mean facing pain.
6
144
838
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Clergy sexual abuse is not an affair; pedophilia is not about struggling with difficult circumstances; molesting adolescents is not about a struggling marriage.  Such things must be called by their right names- the abuser needs to be held responsible for his/her abusive behavior.
19
126
827
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
5 years
Every time we treat someone with dignity rather than shame, respect rather than disregard, concern rather than exploitation, kindness rather than brutality and careful attention rather than turning away – we are doing things that are the reverse of trauma and evil.
7
277
830
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
A pastor with a theological degree and knowledge of Scripture can lift words out of those Scriptures, pronounce them with authority, and wound those under their care. An ability to articulate theological truths does not mean the speaker is an obedient servant of God.
17
135
830
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
9 months
When you sit with a griever, your work is to be with him where he is, not drag him out where you are more comfortable.
9
158
811
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
For many people trauma is not a terrifying event followed by care but rather an utterly and relentlessly terrifying life. As a result, the individual develops vigilance, constant anticipation of danger, chronic anxiety and terror. He or she is never at ease.
16
167
806
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
The length of the grieving is determined by the griever - not by how long you, as comforter, can stand to be sad.
6
122
811
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Suffering people often need others to have faith and hope for them.  Admonitions to hope or trust only often result in despair; if the sufferers were able, they would do so.  It is often helpful to say, “I know you struggle to hope right now. I will hope for you.”
24
177
801
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Learn how to sit and be quiet with one who is suffering. When we don’t know what to say, it is usually best to say nothing rather than allow our discomfort with silence and pain to drive us to rattle off an answer.
9
157
791
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
We need to understand that neither grace nor forgiveness means letting people do what they want or giving them what they feel they must have. Grace is not a lack of restrictions. In fact, sometimes the thing that is most grace-filled is restriction.
15
177
794
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
When someone thinks verbal repentance and a few tears are all that is necessary for restoration to leadership or marriage, the addiction to deceit remains alive and well.
12
128
786
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
3 years
Everyone, no matter their birthplace or capacity or *unlikeness to you* is an image bearer of God.
5
116
786
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
2 years
Numerous studies have documented that it is rare for children or adults to lie about abuse. When victims do lie about abuse, they tend to lie to protect their offender, not to get him or her into trouble.
17
177
781
@DianeLangberg
Diane Langberg, PhD
4 years
Everyone, no matter their birthplace or capacity or *unlikeness to you* is an image bearer of God.
2
134
780