how is someone so vile so consistently funny? no wonder he was a reality show star lmfao like never has someone been so consistently memed or meme-able
after years and years of research and development, drawing what i learned in middle school over and over again, i am proud to announce an important discovery.. The Cool S But Round
@supitsalex
have you never seen shrimp on trays filled with ice? so much better and less fucked up looking. and no thought of shrimp juice flowing from top to bottom….
daily reminder I have a GREAT BUTT
and I’m also looking for a mid-to-senior-level copywriting role based in Chicago remote or hybrid fine and I have a stellar resume
HI! I have transcribed a bunch of the clips from the ZOOM CALLS with the LA POLICE COMMISSIONER!
If you or someone you know is hard of hearing, or if you want to pull quotes, I hope I have made it easier for you! Edits welcome in DMs, updates to come!
@Brittany_broski
this person literally spends all their time harassing big accounts. Like pls get a life you are so sad.
@EwdatsGROSS
isn’t this literally the same user from the other day
welp auntie
@jackieaina
was saying lip plumper is part of her routine so I was like, BET I'm bout to buy some bc I haven't owned lip plumper in years and BOY DID I FORGET HOW THIS SHIT FEELS
@Ya_Ali03
@s1cken1nggg
@postgrad_barty
ok a decent amount of ppl have liked this and I’m only ~40 followers shy of 1k on here so pls make my day?? or don’t. it’s ok! I won’t be mad. be nice to people and drink water thanks
You wake up on Sunday at 11am refreshed and ready to brunch and enjoy your day, I wake up hungover regretting every decision I have ever made that led to this moment including being born, we are not the same
@MrWorkSmarter
@jackieaina
Looks amazing but ARTIST COUTURE is spelled wrong under shops!!!! Had to point out. let me know if you want copy editing/proofreading done for free 😘
People in Chicago on dating apps will be like “love to hike! need a hiking buddy!” bro where are you hiking? At our one state park? Or along our endless plains and prairies? LMAOOO
I’m trying to move out to LA by the end of the year (spring ish?). I’m tweeting because my squad on here makes me feel comfortable, supported, and empowered. So thank you and hold me accountable?
Hi, some quick notes!!
if Trump dies:
-pence takes over til January
if he’s fine:
-he will use this to bolster his platform
if the test was a false positive:
-he will use the chance to slam all the discourse around testing
my friend is visiting chicago for the first time with my friend who is a chicago native (they flew in from LA) and she was so scared about crime we obviously clowned her but then she got pickpocketed AT PORTILLO'S ON ONTARIO THE FIRST HOUR SHE GOT HERE LMAOOOO
ran into an old acquaintance at a wedding this weekend (the second wedding where we were both guests) and now I’m crying cause wtf people can be so gentle and kind ?? And I needed this 😭
I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will fin
olympic competitor horses reaching for each other while also reaching and striving for olympic medal and win rivals but more importantly friends and stablemates
I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will find a job I will fin
i'm glad i went to festivals when i did and don't center my life around that anymore. because i would be BROKEN if i had to shell out $600 for fucking GA at forest. and SCI isn't even playing every night!! like omg y'all have it bad!!
@tkiramadden
the very basic simple steps montage to go from Homely but Adorable Girl to Standard Hot Girl will always weirdly satisfy me. but that might not hold up lmao