CF @Clearingfog_ Twitter profile

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CF

6 years

New post on value propositions. would love peoples feedback. End product will probably be 3-5 similar length posts maybe more.

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CF

@Clearingfog_

2 years

CEO of portco just saw her CFO at a random ass airport dressed in a suit and tie...CFO on PTO for the day...lol

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@Clearingfog_

8 months

Hard agree. PE is less of of a meritocracy than HFs allowing for alot of mediocre folks at the top. The structural advantages of PE allow senior people to hide for a decade + where-as if they were in a HF would be out after 2 years

Shamu Capital #TinBaron

@ShamuCapital

8 months

@bucketshopcap Oh yeah i know - ive been there. But the idiot to genius ratio in PE is WAYYY higher. Few seniors in PE ever read a book

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Exiting my first ever PE deal today...Bought a duplex apartment with my mom before ibanking Also, apparently I didn't read the operating agreement since my parents fleeced me...somehow they get 55% and I get 45% of the proceeds even tho same $ contribution. Absolute killers.

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@Clearingfog_

8 months

Buying a PE backed portco feel like you should have access to the associate and VP for a two hour diligence session where no questions are off limits. Valuations probably drop 20%

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

The Hamptons suck. - one road and 3 hours - no ubers / need a dd - everyone trying to compare 8-> size - cost per night is more than the Ritz/4 seasons House parties with a buncha finance bros scouring tinder to bring girls to their pool party was fun for 1 weekend.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Fintwit is slowly becoming wall st oasis 2.0 in a bad way

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

How PE works: 1. own company doing ok not great, 2. text friend who owns or ran similar type company asking on margins, 3. their margins way better send our headcount to said friend 4. said friend says these 10 management positions not needed 5. begin rif talks with CEO.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Don't worry fintwit I am taking care of him

liens of new york

@liensofnewyork

3 years

There comes a time in every pod shop analyst's career where he is laid off. Today was that day. Not enough dollars in the book to go around. Going to take the time to play chess and eat more ice cream. After that, open to connecting with anyone looking for a L/S consumer analyst

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Investment bankers....you just sound dumb sometimes.

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CF

@Clearingfog_

11 months

Went to Germany for a week ripped cigs, ate what I wanted, drank beers.Didn't workout aside from walking. Didn't check labels but probably zero processed food Came back hit the gym and lungs were trash and id gained five lbs. V confused. Seed oil boyz plz help where'd I go wrong

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CF

@Clearingfog_

3 years

In banking i was a big LILO guy...stroll in around 11am grab lunch with the bullpen and crank until 4/5am. Recently been making a switch to LIFO and lemme tell ya there is a reason life is almost spelt out. Nothing better than being last in and first out, until bonus szn ofc.

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CF

@Clearingfog_

1 year

Last sellside I did we hired one of the big 3 to do a market study...first draft showed industry growth rate of 2-3%...final draft after some fun phone calls showed ~17%...year later now, I'd say industry has contracted 10-20%

CF

@Clearingfog_

1 year

🤔 I mean come on...some of the drivel consultants and bankers produce beg for them to be dunked on

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

Was all excited for wifey because had made new girl friend at gym....10 text messages into their budding relationship she gets hit with "are you and your husband open to diversifying your options for income outside of your professions". Damn MLM

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@Clearingfog_

6 months

Update on my end...decided to take the jump to doing my own thing and recently launched an investment firm focused on IT Services deals. Will be focused on partnering with businesses operating in the verticals of digital transformation (customer software development and ecosystem

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

@AutumnCapital @AnalystEgg Did you stop after first paragraph? Lol. Clearly this case study illuminates a one in at least 8.01 billion skill

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Funny PE interview story from back in the day: Associate is interviewing me for associate role so mostly fit type stuff...I tell him I traveled from NZ to Barcelona hiting 25+ countries in between for 6 months... The man stops me right there and says I was just in Bathelona...

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Been seeing some crazy takes on the Tweeter today ❌ Gridlines on in Excel ❌ Justifying Merge and Center ❌ Starting formulas with = instead of + ❌ Not formatting numbers...2353857 instead of 2,353,857 Just waiting for some pyschopath to try and argue mac > PC for modeling

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CF

@Clearingfog_

2 years

Does anyone in PE read the investment highlights of a CIM? absolutely useless section

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CF

@Clearingfog_

2 years

please stop

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

ib analysts going to the "Buyside" when they could have shirked off in college and cold called for insurance instead of dialing on Joe's HVAC .....at least they can exit to that school in Boston

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

ibanking analyst just told partner and I to send a calendar invite to discuss a deal they are marketing....that's like the analysts one job: send calendar invites and move logos.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Used to drop a k on bottle service at PhD now i just dropped $1,200 for a vet emergency....lot of takeaways here but the most obvious is vet platforms DESERVE those 20x multiples. Doggo ok.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Everyone complains about SPACs having crazy projections that didn't pan out and that's FRAUD! Wait until I show you a CIM from a leading, blue-chip customer base, 500 yr tenured management team, high switching cost janitorial services company marketed by Blaird Williams.

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

The naivety of this post is amazing. Rolling up doc practices successfully is unreal hard...try dealing with 20 physician owners who produce all ur cash flow and forget u paid them "4x" two years ago. Also good luck with stark law and $1mm legal bills on small tuck ins

Michael Moreno

@HealthcareREguy

1 year

A LOT of money is being made by rolling up healthcare practices. A client of mine operates a large private equity firm. When he buys a practice he's paying a 4x EBITDA multiple. As soon as he closes, it's worth 12x. That's a 3x return day 1. How's that for a portfolio premium?

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

When did ibanking start at 8am for analysts? Would rollin 10-11am

Bullpen Clown

@nunchukdave

1 year

You leave the office at 1am - it’s the earliest you’ve signed off in 2 weeks. “Maybe it’s better from here?”, you think. You weren’t thinking. You were dreaming, you realize as the uber driver shakes you awake. You shuffle into the elevator and head up. The day begins in 7 hours.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

In investment banking this is simply known as "plz fix. Thx"

David Perell

@david_perell

3 years

If you ever need to delegate a task, do this: 1) Outline the vision. 2) Share resources. 3) Describe your definition of done.

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

Man can't miss

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

Remembering that time in banking where we did a 110 page CIM with a different version for strategics...coming to PE and realizing that they spend 15 mins on the book -- company overview and financials. brutal

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Hanging with a VC friend and I was bragging that a deal I did should be an 8x return realized this year...he had the audacity to ask if that was good

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Aside from carried interest, there is another way in which PE is able to game the taxman (will delete in couple days). Structuring GP commitments as options with 1.001x strike prices and deducting the "contribution" from one's bonus. Example:

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

Remembering that time in banking when my VP would massacre slides with red ink (actually decent comments only 80% formatting related) and i once told him how the red ink made me die a little inside and from that moment on he only ever used blue pen (but never acknowledged it)

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Going to start an interpretation series... Associate says: "Not sure we’re smart enough at this stage to be more precise than that [re attached work product]" = "I do not have any desire to comb through the 70 tab model to get smart on deal we already know where we bidding"

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@Clearingfog_

4 years

"140 hour work week(S)"!! Massive exaggeration, would bet money he barely crested 100. Idk why that triggers me, but to me people that exaggerate to that extreme (read: lie) invalidates a lot of what one says / opines on.

Nick Huber

@sweatystartup

4 years

We didn’t make much money at all the first few years. A lot of grinding. Late late nights in warehouses. 140 hour work weeks. A logistical nightmare of a business.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Obligatory mountain pic

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

I can tell he stopped listening so I slow my story and he just looks me in the eye and says I can't believe you went to Barthelona and didn't go to Barthelona's best club...suffice to say I didn't get another interview.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Imagine if a public company handed over all their contracts, customer info, supplier info, employment agreements, any potential lawsuits, etc....how much more conviction would you have?

Jon Medearis

@JonMedearis

3 years

Why are people comfortable with private equity funds holding 5-10 core positions, but are nervous when public funds have the same conviction?

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

New routine: everday i lose money in the market I workout so I'll either be rich and fat or fit and poor. Truly a win win.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Man, why is Cisco Webex such TRASH. Like dudes you had 20 years to get this right.

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

Read "barbarians at the gates" once - dawg if PE could still do that I would be long retired with one ridiculous carry check. Those days haven't been around for 30 yrs....

NY_Flâneur

@ny_flaneur

1 year

@Clearingfog_ How PE really works: acquisition financing 90% of the purchase price with debt at historically low interest rates, helping to hide how stupidly high that multiple you paid was

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

I give my associates tons of runway e.g. let them run a 3rd party dili call. Sometimes i will msg them points they need to bring up, but it interrupts their train of thought and you can tell when they read my message...not sure of a better way? if i speak myself i undermine them

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@Clearingfog_

8 months

Too often investors get silo'd into their asset class...in mm private equity your first ten years are focused on deal-making and pseudo-management of your portcos. Outsized returns come from finding/lucking into the right niche (~60%), creating value at the companies by putting

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

@modelsnadderall Automatic level up to MD and provide comments verbally

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

We swapped out the hour long lbo model test with a data analysis exercise. More indicative of the actual job....even still we hired one associate who got all twisted around and bombed it but after quizzing her for an addtl 45 mins was clearly not illustrative of her skill.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Locking the ole account. Some Associates found out who I was...I did post a lot of dog pictures there for a minute.

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

Is it bad for your portco to send a budget to the bank that shows a busted covvie in Q1? asking for a friend

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

I am good friends with a cple partners that spun out prior fund i was at, their first fund is round ~$200mm but too cheap to buy CapIq, so w/o fail every quarter i use my curent firms sub. to update their comp sets for fmv marks....once an associate always an associate.

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

Sell your company in the spring that way you don't get useless 1st yr analysts and associates crafting the CIM

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

The good ole days when we could fund with 95% debt

Masa Capital

@MasaSonCap

3 years

Private Equity, when they buy a co using 95% debt, cut half the jobs, outsource another 40% - destroying communities in the process - and then issue a dividend to get paid tens of $millions as the company goes bankrupt - that’s totally fine. Only when they mine bitcoin is PE bad

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

1. Why PE -- literally dont care, banking sucks thats why 2. Why my fund -- literally dont care, i know u are interviewing for 5 other funds. 3. Would you invest in your deal -- dont care, we all have no clue if it was a good deal

Head of VDR Provider Relations

@ebitdass

3 years

PE peeps - what’s the most common reason you ding IB analysts looking for an associate role? Is it failing modeling tests? Their “story” sucked? Their “why PE” answer was canned? Curious

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@Clearingfog_

5 months

Loving the big law discourse. As a non lawyer, and someone who went to a school that didn't know what iBanking was I found the below graphic helpful.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

So true. Prior fund I used to do weekly refreshes as we learned more... 1,000 line gross profit builds Current fund I asked about it & founder was like these things trade for 8x and if xyz we'll make money or lose money. If you need a model to tell u that then somethings wrong.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

@justinfromvegas @litcapital @dunc_bot Tell me you couldn't get a job in ibanking without telling me you couldnt get a job in ibanking.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Business broker for HVAC deals just sent me his calendly... Effing A right I opened that up and selected a spot. The man has got businesses to sell and I'm here to buy

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

$RICK call getting wild. Have esotric non-cash tax questions because an auditor flagged it (0 value in this Q), have a complete troll, then a question about ATM fees because my guy has been robbed by those 15% charges one too many times

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Two office mates got covid even tho vaxxed. This was post going to an MP where cfo wasnt vaccinated, had symptoms and he still attended. later got tested as positive. You know what that means? Wfh is back in full swing and I aint traving as much. 🙏🙏

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

4) ask questions to look smart or even better make your superior look smart. 5) don't copy the associate or anyone junior to you on *important* emails; vaguely hint that these emails are going around but never fwd them either. 6) wrong analyses are always associates fault.

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

In ibanking I told someone in my analyst class that i was interviewing at Genstar -- he didn't know the firm...I did not get a job at Genstar. He did.

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

Reviewing the first sections (exec, growth, investment highlights) of the CIM with our sellside banker and debating to tell them that ppl only look at Co. overview and financials...can't burst the bubble of the 5 person junior team tho...gotta keep that morale up!!

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Damn I went to coolege not even knowing what ibanking was.

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

PSA: if you are interviewing for a PE associate position try and not talk about a company where the PE interviewer is on the board of a competitor...unless you know the industry cold. Unfair, but depth of questions will likely exceed analysts knowledge base

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

The anger I feel when my $2k desktop computer freezes from opening an excel files knows no bounds!! *for you laptop noobs, thats like a $6k laptop

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

@HighyieldHarry What the 3 hour drive, having to Uber everywhere, no cell service, fiHnaNce bro flexing everywhere doesn't appeal to you??

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Is there a more annoying diligence stream in M&A than benefits and corporate insurance? Always fairly complex/nuanced, your *advisor* is looking for business aka not objective, and it affects everyone at the target company so it matters a ton.

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@Clearingfog_

5 years

@VCBrags Investment memo highlights: "I have a soft spot"

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@Clearingfog_

4 years

Girlfriend and I just finished with a bout of covid. We both have been wearing masks since March 10th and went out max twice a week for groceries (never in elevators with other ppl), so crazy contagious. Symptoms:me, bad flu for 4 days aches, fatigue, oddly eye pain, low fever

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

Seller counsel sends us a purchase agreement at 8pm July 3rd...signs off with hope you have a great 4th!!... -_-

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

Y'all bitching about "mark to market" or whatever that means....Well I just had to take a 3 flight and 3.5 hour drive to middle of nowhere Iowa for an MP.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Well zoom meetings subbing out travel are almost over... Planned to virtually meet a doctor practice for an add-on but other PE fund in process met them in person. Guess what, having dinner in a suit tonight -_-

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Anyone else hate turning in receipts? I refuse to use Concur, never keep paper receipts and hate emailing my admin the random ones i get emailed. Idk its just one of those things i really really dislike

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

lol just saw a new one: Adjusted GAAP EBITDA

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

I wish people would stop using Excel on beginner mode. Many people don't know this, but you can generate significantly better EoY bonuses with these 10 easy "hacks".

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@Clearingfog_

4 years

(1/8) A thread on all those crazy(?) SAAS valuations...please poke holes I have a good friend who is in VC and constantly pitches SAAS names which, to his credit, have mooned. Coming from private equity, my valuation metrics are anchored in cash flow aka multiples on EBITDA..

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

New view who dis

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

PE twitter - what's your funds WFH policy? Just got the news that June 1st we are Tues-Thurs office mandatory. Mon and Friday optional. NYC based

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

@CarryDaInterest @SoulessAnalyst Doesnt stop in PE either but ur late 20s and trying to impress with ur "network" so u call like the 2 lenders and 2 bankers who ur close enough with and then just BS it when they dont know either

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@Clearingfog_

5 years

Do real estate and PE guys know that cap rate and EV/EBITDA are basically the same thing?

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Also....15% IRR. Would have been better w/o capex items, a squatter...actually two squatters...yes I wasn't buying best-in-class buildings at 21 yrs old. So incorporating those add-backs IRR was ~27%. Weirdly, every yr had an addback....feels like there's a lesson somewhere..

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@Clearingfog_

8 months

@InnocenceCapit1 Intellectual honesty and curiosity, which I think are staples of successful public equity investors, isn't overrated and over the long run I do think it matters in private equity as well.

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@Clearingfog_

5 years

@AppleHelix Good analysis. Few accounts I respect and follow retweeting this w/o doing more than 5 seconds of fact checking

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

Generally believe PE is overrated but my god I am thankful to not be a VC today. Bless up squad, the private investors in over banked/auctioned *cash flowing widget manufacturers truly are doing the lord's work. *Defined as pro forma adjusted NTM EBITDA less maintenance CapEx

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

CFO when I ask them why they are missing budget when they barely have a handle on AP and AR.

Tim Hwang

@timhwang

3 years

my ideal email response, courtesy nikola tesla, 1908: "i agree with you that the subject is most interesting. but to express myself in regard to it would necessitate a concentration of thought which, in the midst of my present labors, is impossible for me"

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

@BustedAuction I had 3.5 yrs of PE experience and had to get a sr associate role...ultimately in 6 months was paid like VP and had associate below me. Responsibility and comp > title

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@Clearingfog_

4 years

Decided to become a commodity investor, hoping for a 10x return....I positioned it differently with my now Fiance.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

"go into MDs office" is the best. Would call from an MD's office other analysts and pretend to be said MD. Had one MD that would grind to 1am once a month, so would always use his phone. When the caller ID came up for analyst I was calling u could here the gasps of dread.

Profits Interest

@CarryDaInterest

3 years

Creating this triggered my PTSD

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Is this parody? Surprised he didn't tell her about his 9:15am post coffee shits. "Always ensure double ply at 9am"

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

And I thought PE folks were the inventors of fantasy EBITDAs....NTM long term EBITDA??? What's the point of the NTM in this instance?

Vivek Goyal

@Goyal_Vivek

3 years

Internet Index now trading at 18x NTM LT EBITDA. 10% discount to long term average of 21x. Many stocks (CVNA, PINS, CHWY, MELI) below Jan 2020 multiples..

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Americas back. At an MP in the rust belt and some random ass hotel has about 30 ppl at the lobby bar doing shots.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

(1/2) Thinking of starting a Telegram chat with SMB buyers, search fund folks, and a few PE funds. Purpose would be to share experiences and knowledge with the PE folks providing mid/large cap advice and (ideally) capital as the businesses scale/add-ons come available...

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Associates all ignoring my Teams call means I have to figure out how to do dual axis line graphs again....miserable.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

First year analyst fired (why? Because no attention to detail aka google m&a volume in '21) before bonus season kind of vibes.

Alex Yablon

@AlexYablon

3 years

WFH is good because it inhibits M&A, which generally destroys value

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

@guessworkinvest @capreseceo Second @guessworkinvest big time. 50-$80k delta won't mean much if you stay in finance. Accelerate the learning/experience/time to carry pool and trust me... you'll learn more in one month of PE than an extra year of IB.

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

4) index match match formulas should be everywhere and there should be nested if statements embedded within those. when i open a blank excel its the first thing i do. 5) if a file is <100mb I don't bother opening it. This means the associate hasn't put time and energy into it.

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@Clearingfog_

2 years

@hedgie007 because amortization is all noise and if accountants could calculate an *accurate* depreciation number they wouldn't be accountants they'd be masters of the universe

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Cold called a VP at Greenhill when I was in college. Still have a relationship to this day

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Wife just got sent an NDA to talk about another position in which there was a noncompete clause...asinine. Don't worry I asked for the word doc so one of my associates can redline it.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

Pretty shocked 0 responses. back in my day some strapping PE person offers a beer you grab it. you all are disinvited.

CF

@Clearingfog_

3 years

Hitting this Saturday if folks want to meetup... @liensofnewyork is going as well. Probably get there around 3pmish but no promises

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@Clearingfog_

1 year

🤔 I mean come on...some of the drivel consultants and bankers produce beg for them to be dunked on

Paul Millerd

@p_millerd

1 year

Dunking on McKinsey is a clear tell you are more interested in status games than business. It’s one of the most well run organizations I’ve seen. Most people that leave end up missing the culture. The high standards, feedback and fast pace are very hard to find elsewhere.

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@Clearingfog_

3 years

"Everything I tell you to do is calculated" If I change the bar graph color to a deep burgundy, ITS BECAUSE IT IS DEEP BURGUNDY ON SLIDE 112. #valueadd

Wall Street Gossip

@WallSt_Gossip

3 years

What’s happening at Baird…?

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0

20

CF

@Clearingfog_

4 years

M&A lawyers have it worse than ibankers. Greater probability of weekend blowup since everyone gets them comments on Thurs / Fri. Just had seller send, purchase agreement, multiple EAs, LLC agreement and our lender sent CA redlines friday afternoon...not envious of M&A law life.

1

0

18