I need to cuddle but it's that one special kind of cuddling where someone rubs your insides until you both end up sticky. What do they call that again?
Despite all the horny posts, I would much rather live a life full of cuddling without sex than a life full of sex without cuddling. Even if the cuddling has no inappropriate touching.
The key to happiness is one or two more people rubbing and slapping their cocks on you until all four of your cheeks are slick with precum. And also nachos.
I just really need two men so I can sit in both of their laps at the same time. And if that sounds NSFW to you, then you need to get your head out of the gutter because I never specified that these men were also erect and dripping. You did that. Bad you.
Tops aren't supposed to be submissive. Whenever I encounter a submissive top, I get so angry I want to slap them on both cheeks, just roughly grab them by the hips and pull them deeper into me until they've learned their lesson
Sex at the beach sounds great and all but just remember that at some point afterward you're going to feel awkward as you tour the lighthouse with an elderly couple and you feel someone else's DNA dripping down your legs. Be diligent, go on the tour before the fingering starts.
Learn to appreciate the simple vanilla joys like being idly fingered over the course of a movie on a nice, lazy afternoon, like some kind of soft and pliable fidget toy.
Apparently one trip to the hospital is all it takes for your friends to not want to fill your holes for a week because "we want to go easy on you so you can recover" I need my guts to be destroyed beyond recognition
@FemboyKingpin
I think Smash Bros games between friends should have all of them wearing lovense toys that react to the rumble feature and also they should cuddle afterwards.