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Cancer Final Girl

@CancerFinalGirl

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3 time primary #cancer haver. The killer is inside the house & I'm still fighting. Currently battling #Astrocytoma ( #braincancer ). Be nice.

Los Angeles, CA
Joined July 2020
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
After months of denials my cancer drug Tibsovo is finally being covered by my insurance with a $0 copay!! the drug is $36,000/month out of pocket I feel like I just won the lottery!!!
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
My cousin was diagnosed with breast cancer a few weeks ago and passed away today after only her first week of chemo treatments. I'm stunned, we were going to get together and commiserate about cancer, but instead she is just gone 😢
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I watch the Golden Girls and then cry uncontrollably because I already know I won't get to be an old lady. I was kind of planning on it, preparing for it, but if I make it to 50 that will be a surprise....
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
16 days
Today I'm struggling with the things cancer took from me. It's not healthy to enumerate them but I can't help it. In the past I would have woken up, run a 5k, gone to work, and studied for classes & wrote papers after work. I can't run, work, write papers anymore. I feel lost.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
I'm not in perfect health, but today the elevator is out in my building & I helped one of the older ladies who lives alone carry her groceries up 3 flights of stairs. Sometimes being able to help in small ways makes my day ❤️💜❤️
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
@ShikhaJainMD Insurance companies should be liable for practicing medicine without a liscence.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
@AjvictoryMD How is it that grown adults can not feed themselves in the year 2023? Does sexism make learning to cook hard?
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Thanks to this community of angry tweets the manufacturer of Tibsovo has finally approved me for financial aid 👍 so I will be able to TRY it. Fingers crossed this drug will help me!
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
In an ironic & unexpected twist #cancerTwitter is the most positive place on the internet. Not too many trolls, haters, or narcissists. Mostly just people in rough seas with empathy for all the other folks in the same boat.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I'm glad some folks recover from cancer and can still do all the things. This is my 3rd primary cancer & I can no longer do all the things. Let's try and respect eachother's experience & not rely on toxic positivity as a coping strategy. It doesn't work for everyone.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
One of my very good friends invited me to go to the spa. I haven't been able to go since my brain surgery and the pandemic and I'm crying just thinking about it. I'm worried I'll cry when we are there. Life is pretty fucked when you burst into tears over doing a small nice thing.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I miss my youth. It's unfair that cancer immediately catapults your life into your 80s,regardless of what age you were diagnosed. I feel like I went from 36 to 80 in one day.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Pain 😥 Unpredictable. Crippling. Just when you think you can have a "normal" day #cancer reminds you that your life will never be "normal" again
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
6 months
How many #cancer patients are so miserable that at times they ponder stopping treatment? I'm not at the end of my treatments, I have options, but sometimes I fantasize about just not doing anything anymore.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
11 months
Fuck cancer. Just discovered a friend who was recently Dx'd with kidney cancer in May passed away. He was my age, he only lived 6 months following his Dx. His wife is also my friend & my heart is breaking for her. There is nothing fair about cancer.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
@financebuzz Toxic capitalism be like "you need multiple jobs to pay your bills because under capitalism those who don't work 5 jobs will starve." I a person with cancer: no matter how many "side hustles" I have my bills will never be paid. Tell me what "side hustle" will pay for this.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
The thing no one ever talks about in regards to having hope & staying positive with #cancer is how utterly crushing it is when positivity meets the reality of recurrence. @ThanksCancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Scan on Monday, I know my tumor is growing, I was warned that even if I respond to Tibsovo it won't show on my scans until next year at best. So I already know what to expect. My brain: better start stressing about it now.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I have met some of the most wonderful people on #cancerTwitter . I wish none of us had to be here, but I'm so thankful for the truly wonderful & kind people I've connected with here. It makes the burden of this illness so much easier to bear. Thank you 💜❤️💜
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Here's one of my fucked #cancer thoughts: I'm jealous of the people who CAN get chemo & radiation ☢️ I know it is NOT a pleasant experience, I know it's a lot of suffering & hoping that it will work. I've been told this is a "last resort only" treatment for me.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Ok, I get that some people with #cancer can play the "maybe I'll be ok" game, but this tumor is eating my brain. It's in my memory, and vision centers. There is an inevitably to progression I can't avoid or deny. I already don't recognize faces & have a hard time with words
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
Tomorrow MRI + bloodwork + EKG. My every 3 month metrics of not dying.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
This spoke to me, and I think a lot of people with #cancer shares these feels. @ThanksCancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Omg being sick is a full time job. Doctors appointments, scans & tests, paying the bills, specialist referrals, 2nd opinions, fighting with insurance, obtaining medical records, sharing medical records, updating family members, packing for hospital, it feels like an endless to do
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
My dudes, I kind of hate how being a cancery person has been integrated into my identity. I held it at bay for adenocarcinoma & melanoma, but after brain cancer my whole life changed, my whole personhood changed. I want to be the kid who forgot about having cancer again.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
Everytime I see a doctor the nurse asks me when my last period was. My last period was in 2012 before my hysterectomy for cervical cancer. Every time I get asked this question I lose a little more faith in the medical professionals that I pay to see. Does no one read the chart?
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Nothing like the MRI nurse asking "how much longer do you have to get MRIs every 3 months?" Me: "until I die or they cure brain cancer I guess? Which do you think will happen first?" No one likes my dark humor but you really can't leave the door open for me like that 🤷
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
My heart is full of hope today.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
People with cancer don't exist so you (someone without cancer) can reflect on "what's important" or make you realize some profound truth. We are people facing our own mortality, we are hurting, struggling and often just trying to stay alive. We are not your inspirational story.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
I used to dream about the possibilities of life, all the things I was going to do... Now I just dream of doing nothing and not being in pain.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Dear #cancerTwitter I'm feeling SO blessed today. I'm getting meds that might help me, I met a real life friend, I got to pet a very nice dog. I'm lucky.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
14 days
When do you just lay on the floor next to the bathroom because you're too sick up to actually go back to bed and you're afraid you're going to need the bathroom again.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I have leisons in the corners of my mouth that won't heal, they crack any time I open my mouth. I feel like this doesn't bode well. Maybe I'm ok but I'm starting to LOOK like I'm dying. Brain cancer is an invisible disability but these mouth sores bode ill.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
11 months
Having #cancer means I'm here for a good time, not a long time. So I'm really focused on that, but when I say it to people they think I'm a slut 🤣 No slut shaming here, have fun, be a slut, but it's a different meaning for me now.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
How long after your #cancer Dx did it take you to learn to ask for help when you need help? I always want to minimize my burden on others. Unless it's an emergency I never ask for help, and I need to learn how to do that without the anxiety & guilt of being burdensome.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
6 months
Living with #cancer diagnosis is such a mindfuck because you go through this whole mortality acceptance thing & then you continue to live (at least for a while!) which is more than a little empirically confusing. Like "prepare for your funeral, but we don't know EXACTLY when"
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
Since my craniotomy I've been extra sensitive to textures & fabrics. I started buying silk PJs and dresses & while it seems a silly expense being in soft comfortable warm clothes improves my whole mood & therefore quality of life. QOL has become my focus as much as survival.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
My MRI came back stable, so no tumor growth is a good thing! Meeting with #palliative care tomorrow about pain management, if they can help me maybe I can resume some kind of life again.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Remember, if you die of #cancer you didn't "lose the fight." no. Cancer does not win, it doesn't outlive you. If I die, don't say I "lost the fight", say "she took cancer down with her like Ripley in Alien 3" @ThanksCancer #livingwithcancer #fuckcancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
7 months
This time of year people start saying "remember Covid lock down? That was 4 years ago?!" Me: "remember the time I got diagnosed with brain cancer the same day as we were all told to 'lockdown' for covid?" How many of our lives changed forever on the same day? #cancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Feeling the deep unfairness of the extra pain and stress I got dealt today. It's such a stupid little kid feeling. "Life is unfair!" Life has never been fair, I know it intellectually, but emotionally I'm screaming.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
In the #BrainCancer world we don't get "Remission" we can only hope for PFS (progression free survival). This MRI marks 6 months of PFS for me. #Tibsovo is helping me survive, I hope Vorasidinib gains FDA approval soon for all the IDH mutants in the #BTSM community 💜
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
You might be a #cancer patient if... 1. You eat Immodium like pez 2. Zofran is stashed in every pocket & purse 3. Drs just hand you pain killers 4. You spend more time sleeping then awake 5. You only know the day by your Dr appointments/ treatment schedule Add yours 👇
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
How many of you hold it together in front of friends & family so you don't have to see them upset, then bawl privately?
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
8 months
3 month scan was stable 🎉 Tibsovo is buying me time but I hope Vora is approved soon!
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I mute the grieving loved ones who tweet about the death of cancer patients. Their feelings are real & valid, but I fear those feelings for my loved ones more than I fear death for myself. It's too much for me, I'm just trying to cope with my own feelings about mortality.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
When doctors ask me about my psychological well-being and I casually explain that I have my "cry time" in the morning where I wake up before my husband and cry for an hour or two they act like this is not normal. I then have to explain that this is totally reasonable behavior.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I distracted myself really well the last few days. I met new friends, I petted very nice pets. Looking at tomorrow's all day of appointments just made me burst into tears. The reality of fighting #cancer just overwhelmed me & now my thoughts only loop in a doom spiral.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
How do you cope with the existental dread of facing up with mortality much sooner than you expected? Please drop recommendatons for books, podcasts, or drugs. I'm 38 and I get very upset when I realize that according to "median survival rates" my time might be VERY limited.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
These days my least favorite question is "How are you?" Sometimes I emotionally vomit & tell them all about my brain cancer. Sometimes I just terrify them by saying "horrible." I don't know how to behave like a person under this much stress.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I'm just gutted. Today I've been denied access to the only drug my Dr thinks could help me. Surgery is only an option if the FMRI shows no important activity in my tumor area. I've just lost my job. I have a headache. I feel doomed. Fuck cancer, fuck the US medical system.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I wake up every day and ponder the dumb fucking luck of having #cancer . It's like waking up and losing the lotto of life every single day. More than "why me?" it's "what the fuck?"
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
Normalize making a doctor give you tests to prove you're not dying of #cancer instead of treating symptoms only. There are no self checks for the brain. You can't check for lumps & symptoms like headache are written off as normal. I had brain cancer for 20 years before a scan.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
No one warned me that #braincancer & various meds would leave me constantly constipated. Yes, I eat a LOT of prunes. I feel like I'm 100 years old, I'm 37.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
So the tumor board says "just keep cutting out the bad pieces of the brain." Looks like brain surgery for me again. Trying to be positive, because "inoperable" is a bad word, but last surgery left me with lots of deficits and HURT so much... Not ready to do it again.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I don't think I'll ever be a #cancer "survivor" because I'll never be "cured". #braincancer patients don't get remission, we don't get NED, we don't get to move on. Even if our tumor is "stable" we are just waiting for them to come back what with the 99% recurrence rate.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
When you master the art of crying silently as to not alarm your loved ones with your grief. @ThanksCancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
#cancer is the worst way to meet some of the nicest people.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 months
Putting this here as a note to myself. I've had some bad pain days recently but I did manage to wash my face. Today might be a whole shower!
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Now I'm glad I missed my scan last week. I had a whole extra week not to think about the worst. I mostly enjoyed it. I can see why some people forego treatment & let nature take its course. I don't want to spend the time I have left stressed & sad & suffering in treatment...
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
4 years
A lot of us fighting #cancer don't "look sick" or disabled. Invisible disabilities reveal the abilism of the world around us.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
I swear #cancerTwitter is where are all the kindest people are. Just having so many kind messeges of support makes this all a little bit easier. Plus there are almost no trolls or racists trolling #cancer people. Thank you everyone for making this such a supportive place ❤️
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
3 years ago today I got a voicemail telling me I needed a consult with a brain surgeon after my CT scan that discovered my brain tumor. The voicemail was how I was informed I had a brain tumor. Surreal. So thankful to still be here 3 years later. #astrocytoma #braincancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
They should really list "pants shitting" instead of "diarrhea" as a side effect 🙄 on some drugs.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I don't want to move. My husband doesn't want to move. I told him I just want to move or get a chair lift BEFORE I fell down the stairs. Today I fell down the stairs. I'm ok, just some big bruises on my knees. I know we don't WANT to deal with my mobility issues, but...
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
7 months
4 years ago today I was Dx'd with a brain tumor. All while everyone thought covid was going to be like smallpox. Every year is a bonus. The day I was born I almost choked to death but my dad gave me CPR & saved my life. EVERY DAY is a bonus day.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Happy new year! My 2023 resolution is a continuation of my resolution since March of 2020: just don't die.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
It's my birthday and I'm trying to remember that getting older is a privilege, instead of being morose about the passage of time and getting older...it's a weird thankful grieving process.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Thank you to all the medical professionals who are trying to find ways for people like me to live longer. You guys are my rockstars & I totally fangirl when you follow me back or comment on my posts. Thank you for the time, energy, effort & money you have spent trying to help ❤️
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
9 months
Hoping that science continues to progress & maybe save some of our lives in 2024 🤞
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Fellow cancer peeps: if you were a fitness junkie before treatment & had a hard time getting back on it after years of recovery, meds & fatigue, please tell me how you did it. Everything makes me so tired, but I miss my daily 5k. #running #cancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
These days when people who don't have cancer ask me "How are you doing?" my response is now "best not to ask."
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Fuck fuck fuckity fuck. We had a friend come visit after many negative covid tests. We have been so careful for so long. Today he had 3 positive tests in a row, confirming that we have been exposed. Our tests are negative SO FAR, but I'm really hoping that I dodged this...
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I've started doing my makeup every day to try and make myself feel better about life. It's a kind of fucked up paradigm that when I feel the worst I don't want to look my worst?
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
My job is having #cancer . My duties entail: *Calling insurance & fighting with them for hours *Lots of medical & legal paperwork for Drs, disability etc. *Lots of Dr appointments *Lots of blood tests & scans *Sleeping because I can't stay awake 👉Add the work you do to be sick
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Someone please eat right and exercise for me.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
#cancer gives some strange contradictory feels. I feel so unlucky to have had so much of my life be eaten away by this disease. On the other side I feel incredibly privileged & lucky to have the medical care, family & friends who are still here for me. I'm still here. I'm lucky.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
10 months
Up early today for a friend's funeral. #Cancer is so devistating. My friend was Dx'd only 6 months ago with #kidneycancer . He was 39, otherwise healthy, and it took too long for them to figure it out. Don't ignore symptoms, SCREAM at Drs if they don't do due diligence testing.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I know some people name their tumors. I a #StarTrek geek so I've named my most recent bastard Kobayashi Maru. It's a no-win situation, but perhaps with the right sacrifices and by some impossible cheat I might still get though it.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
4 years
Thank you #cancer community for being supportive and loving to me. I used to be very jaded about strangers (especially on the internet) and this is the one place everyone is kind and empathetic. I hate having cancer, but I really appreciate you all 🙏 @ThanksCancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Not all of us can even hope for "remission," with my most recent #braincancer Dx my doctor said "because of the 99% recurrence rate we don't use that word."
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
My mind is degenerating and I feel it happening. Reading is harder. I have severe aphasia & memory problems. I have walked past my own husband of 8 years without recognizing his face. Please stop with the "prognosis doesn't mean anything." That's just a denial of my reality.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
Doctors acting like you don't have #ChronicPain from #cancer treatment because you are no longer in "active treatment" is a denial of the reality of many patients. The surgeries & treatments I endured left long lasting pain & Quality of Life issues, there is no back to normal.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Maybe I should just accept that my body is never going to stop trying to kill me and make the best of it while I can...
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
4 years
I'm especially proud that I earned my Masters Degree WHILE I had a giant brain tumor. I didn't know I had #braincancer at the time, but looking back it makes this achievement extra special for me. #livingwithcancer #braintumor
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
Dear docs, if you want to do something horrible to me like a lumbar puncture or marrow sample you WILL have to knock me out. Don't rely on people to hold perfectly still during painful or stressful procedures & then blame us for MOVING during a critical moment.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
I used to resent the "fight" language of cancer as the implied "losers" didn't make it. As time goes on I identify more with the fight. That I will sacrifice many things, money, sleep, time, and risk losing everything just live. I will suffer to live. I will fight to live.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
11 months
I'm so over doctors telling me everything is fine and not to worry when I know something is really wrong. Sometimes it feels so pointless to fight the illness AND the medical system. Sometimes I feel like it's all a big waste of time & why bother if this is going to be life.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
11 months
Thankful I'm alive. Every day.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
1 year
Who said "cancer doesn't hurt"? Why is this a thing people believe? This is misinformed and only denies the pain so many people experience every day.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
After 20 years of being told I "just have migraines" and then having to DEMAND a brain scan to convince years of doctors that something was really wrong, my faith in medicine is shook. Why did I have to diagnose my own brain tumor? Don't give me "odds are low" give me SCIENCE.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Just a reminder: cancer support groups are not an appropriate place for caregivers to discuss: 1. How annoying their partner with #cancer is 2. How they are the real victim for having to take care of a loved one. 3. How they are thinking about abandoning their sick family members
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
There is a special hell for people who tell #cancer patients that "clean" eating and positive thinking will heal them.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
How are we all doing out there in #cancer land? I'm living in limbo & denial for now, trying to ignore everything that makes me think past the next 6 months when my current treatment will either help or I'll be having more brain surgery. 😅
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
3 years
#cancer muggle: complains about something they're dealing with, follows it up with "nothing like what you're going through". Me: "suffering is not a contest. I know #cancer sucks, you don't need to dismiss your pain by telling me mine is worse." @ThanksCancer #livingwithcancer
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
The #braincancer is growing back 😢
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
8 months
Got my MRI today & for some reason my arsehole brain was like "3 hours of sleep is enough. Also everything is probably fine." Living with #cancer means living in Schrodinger's denial: Assume everything is fine until proven otherwise.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Today I get to go get a FMRI (functional mri) so they can map how my brain works before I get another craniotomy. I want to keep my memories very badly, but I also want to live. Real quality/quantity issues with the brain #cancer .
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
You know how Doctors have the policy "you will be charged a fee if you cancel your appointment less than 24 hours before its supposed to start"? I think if your doctor cancels an appointment with less than 24 hours notice they should pay YOU the fee. My time is just as valuable.
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@CancerFinalGirl
Cancer Final Girl
2 years
Thinking about the future is different after a cancer diagnosis that forces you to realize the best years really are behind you. The ones where you were young & felt immortal. It's hard for me to enjoy those memories without grief for young me who could do anything.
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