Adam B. Hill, M.D. @Adamhill1212 Twitter profile | Pikagi

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

@Adamhill1212

38,276

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6,206

Following

2,112

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13,352

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Father | Husband | Speaker | #Sober | Author #LongWalkOutOfTheWoods | Peds Palliative Medicine @ChildrensColo | My opinions & not employer

Colorado, USA

https://t.co/G1Ctt20gmV

Joined May 2013

Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

Although the subtitle will change to “A Physician’s Story of Addiction, Depression, Hope and Recovery” Proud to say my book “Long Walk Out of the Woods” has an ISBN and publication date of December 17th, 2019 Pre-orders Available on Amazon!!

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Long Walk Out of the Woods: A Physician's Story of Addiction, Depression, Hope, and Recovery

Long Walk Out of the Woods: A Physician's Story of Addiction, Depression, Hope, and Recovery

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Had a colleague tell me, “To be clear, I’m not depressed. I’m reacting appropriately to the world around me”. Oof, felt that.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Picking up a sandwich (with a mask on) Customer to me: “Living in fear, huh?” Me: “Yeah. I work with vulnerable, critically ill, immunocompromised children. So, yeah. I’m afraid of killing a child. Thank you”.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Hi. I’m a healthcare worker crying at the hospital. It’s important to show more of this.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

In medical school, I was told “Never get too close to your patients or families” My wife and I just got done with a 2.5h dinner with a mother of one of my patients A patient that died 1.5 years ago I continue to learn more from her, than any book I could ever read.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

My wife went to a store today w/ a toddler who decided to have a full meltdown in the checkout lane An older lady watched, offered a kind word & walked off The lady then returned, carrying flowers she bought from the next aisle over & said, “You are a great mom”. 😍❤️😭

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

I took a month off med school for mental health Took weeks off in residency for mental health Took 2 months in fellowship for addiction tx In 2019, I won Pediatric Faculty of the Year We must stop conflating “taking time away from work” as a negative assessment of capability

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

Yes. I’m a recovering alcoholic Yes. I tried to kill myself once Yes. I’m a doctor. Yes, addiction and depression can torment anyone. And Hell Yes, I talk openly about it Because Stigma and Shame have no place in my life.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Today , I celebrate 8 YEARS SOBER!! 🎉❤️🙌🏼

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

In my job. I’ve seen over 300 children die. And to maintain my medical employment Every two years I have to answer a condescending, punitive question that sets a tone of pathologic abnormality Have you EVER sought treatment for your mental health? Of course I have.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

This is me. Immediately after a therapy session. Six weeks after I spent all day in a home taking care of a child at the end of their life. We don’t just walk off a shift. And into our homes. The tears of grief need a space to live too.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Healthcare workers be like: 2020: “How do I avoid Covid?” 2021: “How do I avoid crippling depression?” 2022: “How do I avoid getting shot at work?”

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

A child in America is dying. Child needs meds at end of life for pain. Insurance refuses to fill it w/o prior authorization. Team member pays for med bc American healthcare is broken beyond belief that insurance denies a $12.99 medication to a dying child in America in 2022.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Walking out of the hospital to hear the guttural wails of a family in the emergency room halls. It always stops me in my tracks. I say a prayer towards the palpable pain. Shattered by the echoes of what can’t be unheard. And if you’ve heard it once, you know.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

On his own, my 6yo washed his mom’s car in the driveway tonight. Then went inside to get her and when she came out he said “Surprise!! I love you”. I just wanted to break up the doom scrolling by sharing that.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

My son told me tonight that when he grows up he wants to be a “good dad like me”. And after working so hard at sobriety for almost 7 years, it hit me in the heart like nothing ever has before.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

7 YEARS SOBER TODAY!!❤️👊🏼

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

I am a physician. I have days when I struggle with my mental health. It does not mean I am a liability It does not mean I’m not competent. It does not mean I’m not capable. It means I empathize deeply with others that don’t feel well. And it means I am human.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Crying with a patient isn’t unprofessional. It’s human.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Relatable.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

To the couple that looked down upon my 2yo having a public tantrum. Then walked by my pregnant wife. Rolled their eyes And mumbled “And she is pregnant with another...” Kids cry. You don’t know us. We don’t know you. Be better than that - for everyone’s sake.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

When my toddler really wants something she politely says “peas”. So, here goes nothing. Peas get vaccinated. Peas.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

In the midst of all of this, I got a letter this AM. I’ve been promoted to ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR of Pediatrics. As a doctor who almost lost his life to addiction, depression & suicidal plans. I’ll never lose sight of how far I’ve come. #LongWalkOutOfTheWoods

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

My 7 year sobriety token came in the mail today!!

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Few wks ago, I restarted on anxiety/depression medication for 1st time in 6 yrs All good. I’ve spent a decade in recovery/therapy to know when to utilize another tool in my toolbox I share not bc I’m struggling, but to normalize seeking all layers of support for mental health

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

When I was a fourth year medical student, I took care of a young child, critically ill w/ a rare cancer. Cure/survival felt impossible Today, her mom posted this pic of her graduating high school w/ a caption to me (shared w/ permission) 14th in your class & one in a million!

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Signing death certificates for children on Christmas Eve while baking cookies in home with my own children puts everything into sharp perspective. Grateful tonight for every moment. Every memory. While holding a space for those who grieve during this otherwise joyous time.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

A doctor I know brought tears to my eyes this morning. She said, “I want you to know you’ve changed the way I practice medicine. I don’t question or judge substance use disorder history. I ask, how is recovery going? And can I be a supportive part of your journey? “ 😭😭

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Supreme Court votes 5-4 against Cholecystectomy.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

When I have a hard day at work I say to myself.., “The work was hard today Because I do difficult work” NOT “I need to work harder because it’s difficult work for me” I used to have that backwards. And it almost killed me. #Reframe #ChangeTheConversation

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

I’m a doctor. I couldn’t do my job without a therapist. That’s the whole tweet.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Today marks 8.5 years of sobriety & I’m feeling the best I’ve ever felt in my life ❤️🔥🎉

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Grieving can start long before someone actually dies. I wish more people knew that.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

Things I studied in med school: - Pharmacology - Anatomy - Biochem - Stats - Neurophysiology Things I wish I’d learned in med school: - Grief & Emotion processing - Self-Compassion - Coping w/ Failure - Humanities - Life Balance - Business - Fundraising - Grant Writing

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

I once overheard someone talking poorly about a patient who passed out in a parking garage after an opioid overdose. I felt it was a good time to tell them I blacked out in the woods behind my house once. And like, don’t fucking judge people by only their worst moments

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

My wife just whispered in our infant daughter’s ear “your future just got brighter today”. And I felt it in my bones.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Just a friendly holiday PSA: Avoid buying alcohol as a gift if you don’t know the individual person’s relationship with alcohol.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

I’m a pediatric oncologist/palliative care doctor. I’m a recovering alcoholic with a hx of depression/suicidal ideation. Mental health treatment saved my life. And made me the empathic, compassionate human & physician I am today.

@choo_ek

Esther Choo, MD MPH

4 years

I’m an ER doctor. I’ve seen a therapist and have been on antidepressants. Our system considers this a red flag, instead of a positive signal that I’m taking the best care of myself possible. This needs to change.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Called bc a mother of a patient was “angry”. I walked in, sat down & just her & I sat in silence for almost 20 min. Then, her phone rang. She picked it up, “Call me back later, I’m talking to someone”. We continued sitting together. Sitting together in silence is communication.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

💔 our 15 year old dog died last night. She came into my life as a single man, weeks after graduating med school. A month later, I met my future wife & for 15 years Sadie’s life chronicled our life together Thank you for helping us through the hardest times. You’re a good girl!

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

In 2006, I took care of a young patient who accidentally fell out of a window & died. I held pieces of an open skull. I’n reminded of that often when my kids walk towards a window. That’s how medicine in the real world works. It’s called trauma.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Whenever I hear the phrase “there is nothing left medically for us to do”. I like to remind people that praise, empathy, respect, support, reassurance, compassion & just showing up are all medical things you can do.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Life announcement: My wife, I, our 3 kids & 3 dogs will be moving to Denver, CO in July An incredible 10 years. From depression/addiction to a new life of raising kids, a beautiful marriage & an exciting nee chapter as Chief of Palliative Care at Children’s Hospital Colorado

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

At pediatrician appt w/ 5yo: 5yo: Is the nurse coming in to do shots? Me: Yes 5yo: The same one who checked me in? Me: Yep 5yo: So doctors do the talking and nurses all the hard stuff? Me: Ummm 5yo: Daddy, aren’t you a doctor? Me: Yes sweetie. To both questions.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

My hardworking wife goes into work at 6am I have the kids solo in the morning I often give myself “pep talks” Out loud To work through the morning This morning I kept telling myself “You got this” 2yo looks up while I’m putting on her diaper “You got this, Adam”

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

This morning I hit the road at 6am. Drove almost 3 hours to Chicago to share donuts/coffee w/ 40 sober friends. Friends I’d never met in person, only in zoom recovery meetings. Until today. Then, after donuts/coffee, drove 3 hours back home. With a full heart & so much gratitude

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

So, my parents apparently had a friend make a piece of stained glass for their home. A piece of art as an ode to my mom’s love of books. In the stack, they had the artist include my book “Long Walk Out of the Woods”. And....I’m ugly crying. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

Let’s start a thread to discuss the worst children’s toy to step on. I present “Fighter Jet” For your consideration. #SharpObjects

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

95 months sober today, of one day at a time, welcoming in a beautiful new life. ❤️🎉

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Walking into the hospital behind a mother & 7ish year old kid. 7yo: “Is the hospital closed?” Mom: “Hospitals never close, dear”. 7yo; “That’s a lot”. This is the most validating thing I’ve heard over the last 3 years.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

Yesterday, I received a message From the parents of a child That passed away from a brain tumor several years ago "Can we swing by for a hug?" They live half way across the country now & made the trip to visit friends They thought enough to message me And so, we hugged

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

Birth in the time of #COVID2019 All the same joys, a few more fears, and a lot more masks. Welcome to the world sweet baby girl. #COVID19

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

Today is my 40th BIRTHDAY!!! And my 7th straight sober one as a physician in addiction recovery. I am so grateful to be alive today & excited about where this journey may take me. #LongWalkOutOfTheWoods

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

SIX YEARS SOBER TODAY!!! It’s been an amazing ride. #LongWalkOutOfTheWoods

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Was made aware that “a mentor” warned someone about working with me, you know, because of my “being an alcoholic”. I could relapse and “not be reliable”. Oof. That my friends is stigma. And bullshit. Both, actually.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

6 months

10 year sobriety coin came in the mail today from a friend in recovery.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Remembering in med school I took care of an elderly patient, dying of progressive cancer. She had difficulty falling asleep, so I asked, “What helps you sleep at home?” She said, “One Busch Light & some Harry Connick Jr” Bet your ass I showed up to rounds w/ a 6-pack & a CD.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Today I celebrate 9 years of sobriety ❤️🎉🙌🏼 Thank you to every single person who has helped along the way!

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

6 months

10 years of sobriety!! 😭❤️ My heart is filled with so much gratitude for this amazing journey.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

Let’s take a moment to reflect that being in the hospital IS NOT a sign of weakness. And being out of the hospital IS NOT a sign of strength. And confusing the two is a detrimental stereotype.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

8 year coin came in the mail today from my amazing Chicago recovery friends 😍

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Been sober for 8 years now, so my mom gave me back my 5th grade D.A.R.E Certificate.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

Kids are playing “hospital” 2yo is “sick” 4yo brought in her favorite blanket Tucked her in Kissed her on her forehead Called our dog up into the bed Turned off the lights & told everyone to be quiet in the room So, kids practice healing better than most hospitals....

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

6 years

I was asked to come see an “angry” family. Or they were scared, helpless, worried, heartbroken, grieving, distrustful, afraid, anxious, confused, defensive. Or maybe they were angry. And all of that is normal when a loved one is sick. Feelings are messy. And normal

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

I took care of a patient yesterday Who reminded me of my own daughter. In the unspeakable sadness I cried when I left the room Identifying deeply with her and her family And crying is a normal human reaction. And it should be normal to talk about it. #CryLikeADoctor

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

So, I just saw two (male) doctors complain that a female colleague “got to take 6 weeks off work” (for maternity leave). So, go ahead and create a “wellness program” for employees without addressing sexism in medicine.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

Let me be blunt. Healthcare professionals don’t ever get scared. Healthcare professionals are scared.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

The beautiful wreath that hangs in our office. Each ribbon represents a child we cared for who passed away during the last year. I stare at it for a while some afternoons. Thinking. Feeling. Remembering.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

I dropped something in a grocery store parking lot. Guy (I don’t know) stopped & picked it up. I turned, “Oh. Wow. Thanks man”. He said, “Love ya man” & walked off Maybe it was an accident/inadvertent slip of the tongue. But, I choose to believe it. I still need to believe in it

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

After almost two years of addiction recovery, I relapsed. And I picked myself up and tried again. That’s the tweet.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

2500 DAYS SOBER TODAY WOOHOOO!!!

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Came downstairs this morning. A beautiful, random sober Saturday morning. My wife gets teary eyed, looks at me and tells me how proud she is of me choosing a life of recovery. Damn. Didn’t expect to have joy tears before 9am.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

I took off 2+ months for mental health and addiction treatment From a medical career as a doctor It was hard Fraught with stigma, paperwork, and other people’s perceptions But none of that matters I’m Healthy Happy Thriving And Alive to experience it all.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

When my grandmother died suddenly. I was 23 years old And in medical school I don’t remember anything about the medical procedures, interventions or discussions about her end of life care I only remember how the bedside nurse made me feel Welcomed. Comforted. Loved.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

I walked into a pt room yesterday Stared at 3 IV poles, holding 14 pumps and countless continuous infusions Alarms & Lights And thought to myself “Shit, I wouldn’t even know where to begin” As an ICU nurse calmly orchestrated a symphony of medical movement. @nursekelsey

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

COVID has hit our love-filled household. Staring down a long few weeks ahead. Prayers, hugs & positive vibes welcomed & appreciated.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

Took a bath after my kids did tonight. They used glitter bath bombs I walked up to the mirror just now to view remnants of sparkly glitter on my face, hair...well, everywhere The question is... I’m hosting a statewide webinar tomorrow. Should I just rock the glitter?

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

8 years ago, I was in a partial hospitalization addiction rehab program, working on my first month of continuous sobriety. Today, I’m making my son breakfast & then driving him to school. People count on me & I can count on myself. And that is a miracle.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

My sister has been in the hospital the last few days, minimal visitors still due to Covid restrictions. Her husband driving the 4 kids to the hospital parking lot to wave goodnight to their mother is everything right with the world.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

5 years

I’m a physician I had therapy today I’m a person I had therapy today I’m a recovering alcoholic I had therapy today I’m a mental health patient I had therapy today And I’m worth it. Reminded of that in therapy today. #Therapy

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Been heartbreaking witnessing the grief of our surviving dog. She didn’t eat for two days & would lie in her sister’s bed. She is doing better with love, ear scratches & patience. But, dog grief is very real.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

My “favorite” part of people talking bout “burnout in medicine” nonstop is literally everyone in medicine has struggled over the last year & people still talk about it like it’s a personal issue thing, instead of a toxic broken work culture in the middle of a fucking plague thing

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

Six years ago, I shared publicly that I’m in addiction recovery. I was years sober at the time, physically healed but my world still felt so isolated & small. The last six years of being open about sobriety have been the greatest yrs of my life. A full life. Full of connection.

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Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

I call this candid photo “6am work from home pandemic meetings while raising toddlers & 38+ weeks pregnant”. Subtitled: “Superhero Moms”

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Tomorrow I’m presenting grand rounds at Duke University, a place I finished medical training almost 8 years ago. A place I almost died in active addiction & suicidal ideation I haven’t been back since I can’t wait to go back now. To share a story about what is possible

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

Utter shock & sadness to lose one of our chief residents during childbirth this past weekend. Please consider donating to baby Charlotte & Anthony as they grieve the loss of a mother & wife in Dr. Chaniece Wallace. @Seventh_Wonder

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Charlotte Wallace, organized by Anthony Wallace

On October 20th, 2020 my wonderful, beautiful, loving wife and I brought into the world our first ch… Anthony Wallace needs your support for Charlotte Wallace

www.gofundme.com

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

“Oh! You go to therapy?”, a colleague asked. “Well, I have a history of anxiety and intimately cared for three tiny humans that died last week”. So, seems like a pretty easy call and a really normal thing to do.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

Me as a kid: “Why does Dad wake up so early just to sit in kitchen & drink coffee by himself?” Me tiptoeing in the dark at age 40: “Omg, this is the only time people leave me alone”

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

This installation piece makes me smile.

Tweet media one

17

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

We are at this stage of the surge: Coworker: “I’m no longer sure if I have Covid or If my eyes, throat, nose hurt just because I’ve been crying all day”

12

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

4 years

I walked into the living room as my son picked up my 7 year sobriety coin from the counter. My wife walked over to him & I heard her whisper, “Be careful with that. Daddy worked very hard for that”. They didn’t see me standing there & I just melted Happy Valentine’s Day, indeed.

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

2 years

A little over 3 yrs ago, a hospital operator accidentally gave my cell # to a community doc who called asking for me. She called, she was in trouble, desperate to stop drinking/needing help. 3+ yrs later, she is sober & one of my best friends. God works in beautiful ways.

18

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

5yo asked me to go find something downstairs. I couldn’t find it. 5yo: “I’ve got an idea. This time, go back downstairs and try your best”.

43

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@Adamhill1212

Adam B. Hill, M.D.

3 years

I made a list of what healthcare workers have been asked to do these last 18 months: 1) Too much.

18

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