tom @tom_harlock Twitter profile

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tom

@tom_harlock

16 days

new video: Nikocado Avocado Is Two Steps Behind enjoy!

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

she won’t show her face but will tweet her arse to stop paparazzi profiting from her nudes. what a woman i love sia

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

literally nobody

BITCHIMBELLATHORNE

@bellathorne

7 years

Who's shook

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

alright maybe 2019

tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

in 2018 i’m turnin my depressy into successy

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

if anyone tells lele pons i’ma fucking rip your face off bitch

The FADER

@thefader

7 years

Founder of Vine says he’s working on a “follow-up” app.

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

in 2018 i’m turnin my depressy into successy

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

passing away in my sleep

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

logan paul, ladies and gentleman:

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

unrelated but how do I hide my watch history

Insider International

@InsiderIntl

7 years

Someone in the UK watched 'Bee Movie' 357 times in 2017

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I'm 23 with anxiety

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

🌱simple vegan meal: • glass of water • crack

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

to my ex who said i'd never settle down:

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

If three hearts and a date stamp means ‘instagram official’, I’m in a public relationship with my cat

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tom

@tom_harlock

4 years

i would like to speak to the manager

tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

alright i've given up on 2016. if i live to 2020 i'm having that year okay dibs

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

ha curveball bitch I don't sleep

lils🖤

@8x5lils

7 years

rt in 10 seconds or this doll will kill you in your sleep

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

this 😳 is 😳 sexual 😳 assault

The Sun

@TheSun

7 years

Harry Styles has his crotch grabbed by a VERY eager fan 😳

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

1) sharpay evans 2) ashley tisdale in hsm 1-3 3) ryan's sister 4) the true winner of the stardazzle award 5) girl who sings bop to the top

Chris Brown

@chrisbrown

7 years

Who are your top 5 best performers of our generation?

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

it: pennywise it 2: pennywiser

Rotten Tomatoes

@RottenTomatoes

7 years

🎈 IT: Chapter 2 will be hitting theaters September 6, 2019!🎈

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

imagine melanie martinez relaxing after a hard day of dressing as an infant, logging on twitter and realising she’s been outted as a rapist lmao

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

so baby pull me closer in the backseat of ur rover

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

i found this at a party

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

don’t worry if you’re lonely on NYE, just call that person you like at 11:59pm and if they answer at 12 you can hang up knowing they didn’t get a kiss at midnight ha ha loser

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

absolutely no sympathy lmao in the UK we say “chat shit, get banged” and Tampon L’oreal never shuts up

The Hill

@thehill

6 years

Trump praises Tomi Lauren after woman throws drink on her at a restaurant:

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

jojo siwa getting ready to leave the house

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

high heels (high heels) red dress (red dress!) jonas brother’s might reunite and now I’m stressed

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

no offence to my parents for bringing me into this world but honestly why

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

if you’ve had a hard week, treat yourself by laying your head on a soft pillow, face-down, and screaming until you pass out

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

if you’re under the age of 12, you are not allowed to use the expression “spilling/sipping tea”, but you may choose from the following: “spilling/sipping Capri-Sun” “spilling/sipping sugar-free juice” “spilling/sipping breast milk”

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

and for my next trick, I will simultaneously reunite one direction, mcr and JLS

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

when somebody says "how are you still single???" do they actually expect me to list off my issues bc I voluntarily will I love a chat

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

can we just delete america

Insider

@thisisinsider

7 years

This giant milkshake weighs nearly five pounds! 😱

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

trump: we gonna bop bop bop bop to the top clinton: slip and slide and ride that rhythm

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

nobody: jk rowling: dobby loves piss play

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I will fight you all

Carter Reynolds

@carterreynolds

7 years

Magcon is about to takeover Vine 2

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tom

@tom_harlock

4 years

1,000,000 subscribers? it’s what I deserve

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

i'm in a jacob sartorious mosh pit

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

somebody get this man a diary

Donald J. Trump

@realDonaldTrump

7 years

Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!

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tom

@tom_harlock

5 years

steve jobs, but make it 1970s sex offender

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

if any musical.ly stars are thinking about tryna hijack the rebirth of vine, don’t you fuckin dare or I will tell your mum you cursed at me and get you grounded with no phone for a week

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I just shit my pants

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

I’m a bigger prick than jake paul why won’t shane dawson make a series about ME

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

if you’re single this valentine’s day, celebrate by reminding yourself 100% of relationships either end in heartbreak, divorce or death

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

to take photos alone, I set my camera to record instead of self-timer and I’m glad because now I have my audition tape for spider-man

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

does the iphone notes app have preset apology templates or are racist youtubers just unable to use a proper word processor

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

i asked jacob sartorious to unblock me and then he cancelled his show because i was being "too dangerous"

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

look at me like that again and I’ll peck your eyes out @jakepaul

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

well thank god they have a spare

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I’m going into 2018 optimistic, and if any of you bastards ruin it for me I will 𝓻𝓲𝓹 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓭𝓲𝓬𝓴 𝓸𝓯𝓯

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tom

@tom_harlock

5 years

this is so hard to tweet, but in light of recent bullying allegations, I would like to share my own experience with @codyko he needs to be stopped

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tom

@tom_harlock

5 years

if you ever feel unwanted, simply remember @csydelko and I are so annoying we got uninvited from a charity walk for pancreatic cancer

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

touched down in LA. they surprised me 😭

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

just found out a girl I dated in school has a very rich and basically dying sugardaddy and if I’m honest, I’m proud and a bit jealous

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

David Dobrik can torture me like a war criminal if it means I get bought something nice

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

@BTS_twt the album omg boys well done

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I spent 2009 lookin for a disco to panic at

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

vine 1 died and I rose from the ashes to become average/good at youtube, so the lesson learnt is I’m a bad bitch you can’t kill me

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

being jake and logan paul’s parents gotta be difficult cuz on one hand you know you’ll probably get bought a few mansions soon, BUT you gotta live your life knowing your combined DNA creates demon children

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I know I’m not exactly the most secure of people, but being jealous of my own bitmoji is a new low for me

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

imagine how exciting it was for previous generations when MOVIES were invented and THE INTERNET and all we have to look forward to is the earth’s inevitable death because people are greedy and nobody knows how to fuckin recycle

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tom

@tom_harlock

5 years

today marks the 26th anniversary of the world revolving around me

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

as a country, we need to focus on more realistic things coming home, for example Tracy Beaker’s mum

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

I’m never late to ANYTHING because: 1) time is a social construct 2) I’m there in spirit

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

why u making rape sound like a partytrick smh

VICE Life

@ViceLife

7 years

There's a growing movement of men who secretly remove condoms during sex

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

the next youtube boxing event should be christine vs elijah

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

congrats tom daley’s boyfriend, but you tagged me accidentally lol

Dustin Lance Black

@DLanceBlack

7 years

Helluva night. Receiving the @WGAWest Valentine Davies Award surrounded by those I love and admire so much.

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

he is called Pomme Frites don’t be fucking rude

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

DON’T CALL YOURSELF SPOOKY IF YOU AIN’T EVER SUCK A GHOST DICK

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tom

@tom_harlock

5 years

please find attached my application for white boy of the month™

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

please cast me as Ron or even Rufus idc I’m british we have the same teeth

Disney Channel

@DisneyChannel

7 years

Call me, beep me, if you want a #KimPossible DCOM! Casting has just begun for live-action Kim Possible Disney Channel Original Movie. Who would you love to see play Kim?

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

my cat got a card from my grandparents cat and I didn’t so yeah basically my christmas is ruined

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

u don't have to ask me twice

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I wish rap music was more relatable to me because ‘popping xans’ and ‘stuntin bitches’ sounds fuckin exhausting

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

if you play the spongebob theme tune at 11:59:34pm on new year’s eve and follow the captain’s instructions, we will all hit the deck and flop like a fish in unison at midnight and honestly I think the world needs that

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

I want to solve Madeleine McCann but I need Shane Dawson and Nev from Catfish to complete the trinity

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

not watching the oscars this year, as I think it’s disgusting I haven’t been nominated for my role as Me in the real-life Horror/Drama that is my life

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

the chainsmokers' parents gotta be proud bc they won a grammy but also kinda embarrassed bc their son is one of the chainsmokers

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

I can finally breathe

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

#NewProfilePic

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

pls help my lyft driver won't stop

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

why does every youtuber feel the need to own some overpriced, ugly gucci clothing??? full offence, you cannot buy class and ‘internet superstars’ are proof

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

roses are red, violets are blue, Valentine’s Day makes me want to die, but I did this for you💕 (and likes)

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

melanie martinez is the only time I endorse a baby being dropped

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

sorry guys gotta get this off my chest. ross from friends was a dick. it's been long enough for me to say it idc rachel deserved better

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

happy thanksgiving to all my american friends I’m sorry your president is awful but at least you have nice food

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

please ignore this parody meme account using my photo. I would never endorse a gym as I was born, and will always be, a skinny legend

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

lmao kylie jenner isn’t gonna look anything like her own baby

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

if you need to leave early from a social event, politely say you have a basketball game tomorrow and if they get the reference you have a good friend and if not you get to go home so win/win

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

Me when I flawlessly remember a username and password I haven't used in six months

Gucci Mane

@gucci1017

7 years

I am amazing, I am a masterpiece

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

fergie shouldn’t sing any song that doesn’t heavily feature spelling

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

@jamescharles by UK youtubers I can only assume you mean me

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

she didn't wanna lose her snapstreaks

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tom

@tom_harlock

8 years

satan: "ok u gotta live in a world where troy and gabriella didn't get the part in the musical OR shave off ur eyebro-" me:

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tom

@tom_harlock

4 years

hang me in the louvre (down the back, but who cares, still the louvre)

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

[shania twain voice] man! I feel like a crackhead

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

i will always respect cher lloyd for being the reason this video exists

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

this ended on day 97 nvm u right

tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

to my ex who said i'd never settle down:

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

happy one year anniversary of that time my american mates gave me the traditional july 4th experience

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

haven’t seen my sleep paralysis demon in a few nights and I’m like ???? I thought we actually had a proper connection😔 must have mug written on my forehead x

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

i'm gonna fuck ur son just to piss u off

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tom

@tom_harlock

6 years

it’s a week into october and my house has zero poltergeists :(

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tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

I’m sorry for being smug, it updated and I want to drown myself

tom

@tom_harlock

7 years

my snapchat still hasn’t updated and honestly I feel invincible

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