Eliška Valko @NerfCrucifix Twitter profile

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Yesterday, I made some sweet music with a new friend. Please check it out..

Eliska Smiga - ANC Open Mic Night Jam with Barrett

bluesy jam with a new friend, Barrett Simms @ https://wbsimmsmusic.com

www.youtube.com

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

My mom just told me "please let me die before you cut your penis off." So how's everyone's day going???

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

I'm fine. Thanks to all for reaching out. I'm more annoyed than any thing. Convo started off great, I called to ask her about the czech slang word for pussy my g-ma used. I should have known a convo about genital terns was going to go south... my bad. It's Pudelka btw.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

My pronouns are:

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

1 year

Today I'm celebrating 1000 days on HRT. Damn y'all. Time flies. Here's to 10,000 more!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

1 year

I can now say that officially, on a cold December morning, a female baby named Eliska was born.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

ACAB does not include @calebsaysthings ’s character in Jurassic World Dominion: CIA agent Jeremy Bernier.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 years

@the_real_hard Roll call: who clicked on each one?

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

7 months

@masonmennenga

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Orkoectomy today! Finally getting rid of this guy.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

1 year

Yesterday, @thejosieyoung blindsided me with easiest question to answer, ever. Now, it took me a moment to answer, just because I couldn't believe it. Ahhhhhh, I'm so happy!!!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@KaresKaren lol Right?! I also could probably get it done without her ever knowing.... I don't see her that often.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Some fast-ass bluesy bullshit for ya’ll. Happy Friday!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Dressed real cute this morning and paid off my car note early, I think I deserve a little “Good girl!” for a job well done!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

@savbrads Didn't know Paul Giamatti had a new role

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@electrolemon

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@Transition_Vamp What a shitty thing to ask 🧡🫂🧡

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

5 years

@hunchpunch @ConcernedApe Agreed. This position is bonkers. Broad needs but also pockets of specialization. Basically must be webmaster/accountant/office manager/community manager.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

5 years

@NikTreehorne @ShutUpAndrosky I dReSs tO lOoK gOOd

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

5 years

@eatinginmycar Died how he lived, Auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 months

The "E" works if you work it.

Saffron Olive

@SaffronOlive

3 months

I think dropping "enters the battlefield" for "enters" is a fine change, although I imagine ETB is going to stick around as the abbreviation, since "E" doesn't really work.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

It's about fucking time LEGO came out with a lesbian commune playset.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

A facebook friend just posted this, asking her friends if they know anyone single that fit the bill...... Are the cis ok????

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Elon isn't going to see you dunking on his hair transplant but trans women who would love to get a hair transplant but can't, will.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

6 years

@BlackMesaResrch @j0324ch @RichardBieker @Fallout Tell him you’re doing some volunteer work for the Responders.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

A trans girl who’s way into crafts with the deadname Michael who changes her name to Joann.. send tweet.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 years

@AgeOfEmpires AoE4 info??????

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

11 months

@keplyq There's 2 were pitted against each other in my mom's county last year.....

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 months

@Mxdvgtbls @TheJosieYoung This set! It's such a great set with such great value.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

@vyrthandi Yup. Also, remember in the 90's when bad meant good? Well if we go a little further back..... that's right, another slur for trans.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

5 years

@protoutopiancr1 @kathbarbadoro That smile!!! 💋

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

8 months

@the_cruisetv @netflix Bro... I beg you, please grow as a person

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

9 months

@levitorres_ @jezheywood @mnurkic levi fartorres 🧡

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Welp... It's legally binding... no takebacksies. Ya girl is now legally Eliška, Female....😭

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 years

@wright3737 @franklinleonard @AOC This your boy?

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Dr. Strange and the Multiverse of Madness, 2022

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Had a wonderful Valentine’s Day dinner with the love of my life, @TheJosieYoung . We got all fancy and had the most amazing night. 💜🧡

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

7 months

@zachsilberberg tyler the creator, does that count?

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@sparhawk_james @andreagonram @thisisinsider @VOCInsider Lol, I can’t imagine being this fucking stupid.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

@The_Ada_Rhodes As someone who recently fled Texas, most have no fucking clue. My decision came as a total shock to just about everyone.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 years

@Robert_E_Kelly @abc7leslielopez Robert commenting on this made my day, he's the OG!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Saturday marked 6 months of being @TheJosieYoung 's girlfriend. Gosh, I love this woman so much... 💜🧡

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

LOL I paint some cedar planks for my girl and it goes viral..... lolol wtf

Respectful Memes

@RespectfulMemes

2 years

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

If you wanna be a girl you can just be a girl!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

5 years

@daveanthony

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

POV: I have your balls and you're not getting them back.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@Write_the_Write Lol she absolutely does not.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Another day at the office.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Just realized, today is my 1 year HRT anniversary. What a journey!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 years

@jkfecke @KingK4hn Free SShipping

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Ya girl made the front page... in two articles lol. If I only cared more and was more vocal about drought, I could have made it a hat trick.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Girlfriend hat-swap!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

6 years

@MikeAppleton3 @mitchellvii Page source says that entire page was created today

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

1 year

A lot of Trans people have been sounding the alarm about Brianna Wu for years now and the rest of y'all are finally waking up to her bullshit. Took long enough.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

This is 42.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@AlyAlyOutnFree Good morning all! I’m Eliška! She/Her. In a few days, I will be celebrating my 41st birthday and 1 year on HRT. If you love goofy bullshit, I’m your gal. Also if you love literal bull shit, I do tweet about bullriding here and there, lol 🐂

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Locking down my social medias for a bit. Going to be speaking at my local city council tomorrow regarding a LGBT book ban. Also, on Thursday an article is coming out about me in the local paper, so since my visibility is going up a little, it's time to hunker down a bit.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

My local paper wrote an article about me transitioning in a small town... Mom is not going to be happy I put her on blast for not affirming me but, oh well, maybe this is what's needed.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 months

Half the fun of getting married is making the photographer spend half of his time taking pictures of you and your bride being absolute goofballs.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Just took two silicone bullets to the chest.. non lethal rounds. ACAB, the C also stands for C cup

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Going out with the boys!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

OMG just had my hair transplant consult. Date set for Oct 5th!!! Aaaaaah I get my hairline back!!!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Good morning, spell it back. That’s right, spelling pop quiz on a Tuesday.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

@keffals @izzitMichaela Yeah, you still haven’t deleted the tweet….

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

I’m not ready to post pics but my hair transplant is going well. The last 3 weeks of growth have been BONKERS. I’m beginning to believe this is going to work.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 years

@KevinTPorter @christianfunpod It better be the queen herself, Amy Motherfucking Grant.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

It's so amazing that I now fit in, and spend all day in, the high end lingerie I collected as a crossdresser.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

1 year

Transitioning did wonders for me but moving to a safe state and getting with a pcp that stocked me up with tons of injectable E has done more for my mood than transition ever did. Boston-Peace of Mind.mp3

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@AlyAlyOutnFree Good morning all! I’m Eliska, 41, she/her. I love buying absolute dogshit at estate sales. I picked up a Newsboys CD for a quarter today. Also, I’m 12 days away from my orchi, I’m pretty pumped about that.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Today is 2 years of presenting en femme full time! I just want to say to myself, "damn babygirl, you've come a long way." Can't wait to see future holds!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Headed over to Queer Pizza Hut for a personal pansexual.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Coming off these magical weekends with @TheJosieYoung is always so hard. Already missing my hammock buddy. 💜🧡

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

7 months

@tenaciousV56 @stephenwhittle They can always tell.... lol

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

11 months

My brother in Christ... God made you trans, stop going against His plan for you.

Daisy

@DaisyIsNotHere

1 year

Transition still plague me today. I still fantasize about being a guy at least a few times a week. I’m often a guy in my dreams. But now I know that I can’t indulge those fantasies. I have to be the best mother/wife I can be. Jesus Christ is my only hope. He is your only hope too

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@AlyAlyOutnFree Yeah, that’s me, Eliska. You’re probably wondering how I got here… Well when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, they get a little loose on Bartles and James wine coolers and then 9 months later, my she/her identifying ass comes online. Oh and I’m 41 and like Sting.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Had a wonderful and memorable Saturday night dinner with my wonderful girlfriend @TheJosieYoung . It was one of the many highlights of the entire weekend I was able to spend with her. 💜🧡

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

5 years

@VP @CBP STAGED

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

1 year

RIP Community Notes

Community Notes Violations

@CNviolations

1 year

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Me: "Josie! Look at these sexy boots!" Josie: "Ready for a big day down at the cranberry bogs, huh?"

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

So excited to cosplay as this dog on Monday.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

My small Texas town had its first Pride celebration. I totally expected it to be joke but Josie and I had so much fun. When we pulled up there were so many cars that Josie and I half-joked that those had to be protesters. We were so wrong. Did I mention there was fire dancing!!!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

I got to finally meet this wonderful woman! Thank you ⁦ @SuperMichelleHD ⁩ for being the absolute best to ⁦ @TheJosieYoung ⁩. You are so gorgeous and fucking fun to be around!!! 💚💜🧡💜💚

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Everything is a milestone today! -Last time my testicles will be in this Home Depot -Last pint of gizzards eaten while having testicles -Last Texas sunset for my ballzzzzzzz

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

@ampersandamanda Thought the same today! The lectionary has been serving up some really good trans related sermon examples as of late.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

@StacyCaySlays Damn girl. What's your monthly shovel budget? You keep digging... Just stoppppppppp, and yes, the answer is yes.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

4 years

@rayt4bern @krystalball Viagra has entered the chat.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@jesstheunstill I like the 💜🧡combo. Reminiscent of Figment at EPCOT.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

1 year

They're protesting the Rooster Teeth convention, which is going on right now, downtown. They were screaming stuff about how Red vs Blue went woke.

steven monacelli

@stevanzetti

1 year

NOW: Members of the neo-fascist white nationalist group Patriot Front, whose leader is based in Texas, are marching in Austin today. 📸 via @SomewhereinATX .

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Today is my 2 year HRT anniversary! Since that very first day, each day has been better than than the last. God, never have I been more sure that transition was the right decision.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Anakin’s down in Austin hitting the clubs. We calling’ it Sith Street.

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

@AlyAlyOutnFree Hi! I’m Eliška! She/Her 2021 has been a wild year for me. Too much to list but it was my first full year as myself. In a little bit, I’m going to family Xmas all dressed up.. I’m nervous. I’ve always boymoded around my family, but not today. 😬

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

Well, I’m a few hours past my orchi and the little fuckers haven’t grown back yet, so I think we’re out of the woods. I have a lot of thoughts about this, so here’s a short 🧵 1/8

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

3 years

If you have some extra Babybel and progesterone laying around, here’s a craft idea that’s fun for all ages!

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Eliška Valko

@NerfCrucifix

2 years

Just fyi for anyone with super receding hairlines considering a hair transplant. This is what mine looks like after a year of growth. It’s always going to be thin but I love it am happy with the results . I don’t normally style it back like this. They worked a miracle.